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I don't know if anyone else feels this way, but for me JavaScript kind of feels like trying to understand people. The more I learn, the more history I understand, the deeper the foundations of my knowledge become, only leaves me with more questions. Now, this is true of programming at large but the divergent nature of JavaScript just blows my mind. I'm sure that's not unique.

Like, I was learning about accessor objects today, sure they're similar to other languages, but the reason it fucks me up so bad I guess is the why? Just like the motivations of people. I understand it to be dynamix creation, but still. And, for a long time what's really drawn me to programming is how humbling it actually can be. But I just feel like some student of philosophy where meaning starts to circle back onto itself.

I got it admit, as much as I love programming, it's insanely frustrating. It feels like one step forward is always two steps backwards, and so there is no root place to understand meaning. Maybe I'm just rambling and this isn't a unique feeling at all it's just so frustrating trying to master something, feel like it's at your fingertips and it moves away. It's almost like Heisenberg or something, when I quantify and measure my skill, it invariably makes the measurement wrong.

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