46
irene
13d

Feeling like shit recently. Hello depressman.

Comments
  • 6
    Hello Shit.

    - Another Shit
  • 4
    @cursee hello, another shit 😁
  • 2
    @irene not much tasks to finish at work?
  • 3
    @cursee I have tasks but they are even more dull, boring and undefined than previous ones.
  • 3
    @cursee half of the team on last retrospective said it is boring right now.
  • 4
    @irene Hello Irene ... anything I can do for you?

    *hands you a box of chocolates
  • 4
    @redman chocolates do not work on me anymore.
    Food don't work.
    Drinks don't work.
    Movies, videos, anime, games don't work.
    Nothing works.
  • 5
    @irene *grabs jumper cables*
  • 3
    @irene Sorry to hear that ... than I'll do it the old fashioned digital way:
  • 2
    @Jilano are you going to strangle me to death? I accept that.
  • 4
    @redman hugs would be nice. Maybe. I dunno. I don't like humans. ._.
  • 2
    @irene A long time a go I read this quote:

    "Today, give a stranger one of your smiles. It might be the only sunshine he sees all day."

    *gives you a smile
  • 3
    @redman what are you planning? *Looking suspicious* -__-
  • 4
    Think of a cool side project. Start that, learn lots, pretend not to do it in work time (I mean don't do it in work time, of course.)
  • 1
    @irene Absolutely nothing, just trying to help you feel a little better than shit.
  • 2
    @redman people who smile to strangers for no reason are suspicious
  • 2
    @irene technically everyone here is a stranger
  • 1
    @irene Could do lots of things with them! From whipping to strangling, stuff for all tastes!

    @redman You can't say that!

    @jAsE sent me a baby emu.
  • 1
    @irene have you watched the absolute wholesome anime series "Aria"?

    I watch that one when I'm depressed. Comfy, peaceful positive anime.
  • 0
    @sergiolarosa89 no. I haven't
  • 2
    Same
    Is there a way we can help you? @irene
  • 0
    @RootPixl if I knew what would help I'd probably did that already 🤷
  • 4
    @irene try meditation, lo-fi and playing some games (shooters or strategic games), it works for me haha
  • 1
    @irene basically its an (old but not very old) "slice of life" in a curious scifi setting.

    Mars is already terraformed and colonized from mankind. It's a paradise: beautiful oceans, giant forest, a friendly ecosystem.

    The main city is Neo Venezia (Neo Venice), a perfect recreation of the old Venice just like it was back on Earth (during our current millennium, our actual Venice is already under the sea, sadly... Climatic change).

    In the peaceful Neo Venezia, the true starts of the city are the Gondola Guilds: they train the new gondola drivers (a job historically reserved to girls in this future) in order to show the city to the tourists, between water canals, bridges, the famous Campanile and all the buildings of the city (some are the original ones, saved from Venice fate on Earth).

    The story follow a girl during her training as a "undine" (gondola driver), under Aria Corporation.

    Very cute anime that restore my faith in humanity every time.

    (Sorry for my bad English)
  • 0
    @sergiolarosa89 never heard of it 🤔
  • 3
    @irene

    > I don't like humans. ._.

    Have you tried online games where you shoot people ?
  • 1
    @Nanos yes. i'm not good agains "koreans" who just headshot you every time
  • 1
    @redman

    At what point does a stranger become no longer a stranger ?
  • 0
    > Feeling like shit recently.

    Is that because life is being shitty ?
  • 2
    @Nanos yeah. something like that. everything isn't that great recently. even weather
  • 2
    @irene, ha i know how u feel rn.

    No change in sight... no change... :(
  • 3
    @irene

    Any questions any of us might be able to answer which could improve your life ?

    Not that wisdom alone can make your life better without resources to action that wisdom..

    But sometimes it can at least help to know what direction to head in, so that tomorrow sometime if you do possess those resources, you could action change for the better.
  • 5
    @Nanos I second this. @irene please let us know if there's something we can do. And if there's not, please vent about it on devRant if you need to.
  • 3
    @Nanos I don't know. I'm having apathia and anhedonia for a pretty long time already. I literally do not want anything except not feeling constant boredom. And I cannot feel it because nothing feels interesting.
  • 1
    @irene

    FX [ Wonders what kind of things might interest irene.. ]

    https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/... ?
  • 3
    @irene

    I have a theory (Oh wait, I'd better use the more scientific term, or people will complain I'm being too simplistic.. but then folk will complain I'm using too many long words..), I mean hypothesis that in males in particular, that as we age, we risk self-destruction if our, lets call it, genetic programming determines we are unsuccessful in life.

    I've studied this a little, to try and better understand peoples reasons for taking their own life for example. (Many leave notes, but it isn't easy to gain access to such material for study.)

    Many are stuck in a catch 22 situation, their life is shit, they don't have the means available to improve it.

    Unless someone literately throws money at the problem, it isn't really solvable, at least not in the short term.

    Long term, if you can find out what could improve your life and head towards that goal, if you reach it, things can feel better.
  • 2
    @Nanos a mineral?

    I feel I'm just a failure in everything possible. Right now I'm just a corporate drone without any ambitions.
  • 1
    Were here for ya 😘 punch that sucker in the nuts
  • 0
    @Nanos

    I reckon you can cheat a little and fool your primitive genetic programming with such things as computer games.

    Beating a machine, can provide similar benefits to beating other humans. (Though in essence, you are beating another human, the programmer who built the software!)

    It is one of the reasons I think you see assholes online causing trouble, because they feel better when they hurt others.

    Other folk turn that into themselves, punishing themselves to try and feel better.

    Others, just feel like shit..

    I find I have to constantly fight this feeling now, much more so than previously, even though my life is slowly improving. (He says, still in debt, but hopefully out of it this year, after nearly 20 years in debt..)

    There is a lot out there, that you might be unaware of, as such, there might be something that sparks an interest, if only you knew about it.
  • 2
    Also this
  • 1
    @Nanos

    Or it might be simply that you desire human contact.

    Physical contact is rather a necessity I reckon.

    And increasingly difficult to come by for some.

    Difficult to find an answer there, at least, I've not found one yet.

    But hey, wisdom of the crowd N'll that jazz..

    (Ok, so I've read that it doesn't always work well..)

    https://health.howstuffworks.com/me...

    Related link:

    https://youtube.com/watch/...

    > Refuting "Groupthink," Research

    > Proves Wisdom of Crowds Can Prevail
  • 0
    @karma

    Reminds me if you ever ask someone in hospital how are they, they always 'fine', when they should be saying "No I'm in bloody hospital, what do you think !"

    Also reminds me of people who ring up a hospital to cancel an appointment because they are ill..
  • 1
    @Nanos ya, most ppl say they fine while really they struggle
  • 1
    @Nanos games don't help anymore. I'm not good at them nor really interested anymore
  • 1
    @Nanos yeah, maybe some contact would help.
  • 1
    @irene

    It's such an unusual material though !

    -------------

    Herbertsmithite, in a pure synthetic form, was discovered in 2012 to be able to exhibit the properties of a quantum spin liquid, a generalized form of strongly correlated quantum spin liquid [3] due to its Kagome lattice structure.[4] Herbertsmithite is the first mineral known to exhibit this unique state of magnetism: it is neither a ferromagnet with mostly aligned magnetic particles, nor is it an antiferromagnet with mostly opposed adjacent magnetic particles; rather its magnetic particles have constantly fluctuating scattered orientations.

    Optical conductivity observations[5] suggest the magnetic state in herbertsmithite is a type of emergent gauge field of a gapless U(1) Dirac spin liquid.

    -------------

    Also its kryptonite..
  • 0
    @irene

    Would easier games help ?

    I have to say, nowadays, you have to spend like a decade training your character up before you can actually enjoy the game !

    Maybe some old fashioned arcade games via the MAME emulator ?
  • 1
    @Nanos no, I just get bored in single games. Often I play one game only one day and then loose interest in it after I've slept.
  • 1
    @irene You might want to consider talking to a professional about the issues you are facing. Getting help might get you out of the continues circles your thoughts may lead you. It helped me in the past to get over issues I had to deal with. Getting an objective feedback might help.
  • 0
    @redman I cannot. It's an unknown human.
  • 1
    @irene Okay, unknown at first. Tell him/her that and get to know the person in a couple of sessions. Would that make it easier?
  • 0
  • 1
    @irene Okay, professional is out ... any close AND dear to you to whom you can talk?
  • 0
    @irene

    Less of a failure than me, I'm not even a corporate drone !

    > I feel I'm just a failure in everything possible.

    I guess some of us have to be at the bottom, whilst others are at the top.

    Do you gamble a little at all ?

    Random chance can help a little, the unexpected changes that could occur. (I recommend just one lottery ticket a week.)

    Usually I hear doing something you are good at helps, but then you need the motivation to do that..

    And you might not be good at anything !

    But maybe you could become good at something.

    But then, it takes effort to gain that skill..

    Catch 22 situation.

    In some countries, the therapy for that is to stick you in a room full of attractive friendly women. :-)

    But if that isn't available, ones choices are, limited..

    At least online contact can help a little I reckon.

    Apparently those most happy in their jobs, work in the demolition trade !
  • 0
    @redman no close peers at all.
  • 1
    @Nanos I don't gamble. Because I never win in gambles. And no attractive woman is friendly to me. 😞
  • 0
    @irene

    Do you find multi-player games less boring ?

    Gives me an idea, perhaps I can develop games that help improve feeling like shit ?

    I'm not sure if that is really possible, without a change in the physical world offhand..

    But then, if you are remotely controlling a robot someplace, you are actually changing the real world.

    Just not where you are..

    So, maybe that might help if you was involved in remote build a moonbase..
  • 0
    @Nanos multiplayer games are less boring if you have a team. Without a team it's nothing different than an even more boring single game.
  • 1
    @irene open world games maybe? Mindlessly wander around blowing shit up. Fallout with the bloody mess perk on is a good option. Or skyrim, sending an arrow sailing through a bots dome always seems to work wonders.
  • 1
    @M1sf3t I've played Skyrim before. It's grindy
  • 1
    @irene

    I believe the standard gambling rate of return is something like 1/3 of your money back.

    Yes, I'm familiar with the not friendly issue of others there.

    I hear an improved physical body can help there, and being physically strong.

    But I guess no motivation to start doing that ?

    Struggling there myself..

    You know the way to help prove a theory right, is to try and disprove it.

    So, if you started buying one lottery ticket a week, you could report back to us here, that you didn't win, to prove to us that you are right !

    Of course, it would have to be over a long enough time period, say a year or two.. to have any statistical accuracy..
  • 2
    @M1sf3t also it's hard for me to enjoy a game without a certain goal. And I feel the same in life. I need someone to set me goal.
  • 1
    @irene

    So many games today are grindy aren't they. :-(

    I hope mine isn't !
  • 2
    @irene Without professional help or close peers to talk to, getting help (assuming you want to) is going to be a serious challenge ...
  • 0
  • 0
    @irene

    Do you have your own means of independent transport ?

    Are you fit and athletic ?
  • 1
    @redman I've figured out that answer already. It's not like I'm just recently feeling like that.
  • 1
    @redman

    We can be substitute close peers. :-)

    And I dare say, probably just as good as many professionals out there !
  • 1
    @Nanos I have no private vehicle. And my body state is total shit. Worse than ever.
  • 1
    @M1sf3t

    I used to like Battlefield 2 for that, especially putting explosives under bridges and waiting for some hapless person in a jeep to drive over.

    Or stick them on the helicopter and wait till they have lifted off. :-)

    Or stick them on a wall just around the corner of a building..
  • 1
    @irene

    2 possible goals there, get your own vehicle and improve your body.

    A bicycle counts as a vehicle right..

    Or a go-cart even. (I had one of those, most handy for transporting things around, even if you look like silly in your 20's with one..)
  • 1
    @irene it is in the beginning, you get to about level 25 its starts getting pretty good if you put your perks in the right spot. For example, level up you sneak to 50 then select the dagger perk and you'll get a cut scene of slitting the bots throat anytime you sneak up on them with a knife.
  • 0
    @Nanos why should I get a vehicle?

    What is a go-cart?
  • 1
    @Nanos I don't care about my body. No one needs it and no one cares about my existence. I see no reason to even care about myself.
  • 1
    @irene

    I care.
  • 1
    @Nanos but do I care that you care?
  • 1
    my internet is sooo not keeping up with this conversation 🙄
  • 0
    @irene

    Vehicles are useful for getting from A to B.

    Handy for dating purposes, or making female friends.

    Go-cart, gravity based vehicle.

    I used to collect firewood mainly with mine.

    Nowadays, I have a bicycle.
  • 0
    @irene

    I don't think it matters if you care that I care. :-)

    I just do.
  • 2
    @Nanos that was definitely not the go-cart I was picturing...
  • 1
    @Nanos well. even if i'd had a car i would have no new peers anyway.
  • 1
    @M1sf3t

    I've probably not got the bicycle you are picturing either. :-)
  • 1
    @irene I am sorry about your situation and really wish I could help you. Not because I have an angle, but simply because people helped me when I *really* needed it.
  • 0
    I would just try something manual. I dont know your intrests, but maybe there is some thing that you belive creating is like huge challange, maybe try digging into that topic figure something and maybe put something together.

    Around year ago or so, I was meeting my friend very often (like 4-5 days a week), and mother of my friend does pottery. Maybe sounds silly but I found it intriguing, and after small 2-3 hour long lesson I made finally something usable (okay, it needed to be heated etc, so it was not yet usable). Huge mug that can hold over .5 l of coffe and fits into tiny coffe machine.

    Im sure you are able to find your thing. If you literally dont have any idea where to go, try opening up incognito mode (so your cookies tracking what you like and are intrested into aren't obstructing) and just try looking through random garbage on internet and if something catches your attention follow the trail.
  • 0
  • 3
    @DubbaThony making video games is a huge challenge. Making some decent AI as well. Making a board game is a challenge as well. And i canot do any of those. I have no energy and no creativity.
  • 1
    @irene Hmm.. Some time ago I started toying around creating games. Honestly that's one big hell (maybe becouse I chosen godot and I really hate python and started to hate gdscript). But do something small. No idea what to do? Most simple match-3 game, dosent really matter. If you want to see how shitty my first emm... piece of shit? it looks more like demo that I can move objects around and I can actually fucking accept user input lol

    EDIT:
    (yes, I have 0 expirience in mobile department)
  • 2
    @DubbaThony i have made a tiny game which works in console. it had a simple maze generator in it as well.
  • 2
    @irene

    Oh if you have a car, suddenly everyone wants free lifts. :-)

    But its a useful tool for obtaining peers.

    And, if you get something like a bicycle, not only can it get you from A to B, it can also improve your body at the same time.

    Though I'm not sure how many new friends you'd make on a bicycle just riding around.

    Some folk I know make tons of friends that way.

    I can't say that has ever worked for me, but then, perhaps I just need a more interesting bicycle..

    Ok, so technically I probably have the most interesting bicycle in the entire country, and no one has really come over and chatted to me about it, but hey, that is probably because I just haven't bumped into enough people yet!

    The downsides to living in the middle of a desert I guess..

    Reminds me:

    https://youtube.com/watch/...

    > No tie, no beer

    Well, I couldn't find the mirage one..
  • 1
    @irene

    I remember decades ago doing a maze game, I was particular proud of the assembler maze generator based on someone else's algorithm I read in a magazine.

    How did you generate your mazes ?
  • 1
    @Nanos no one would like my lifts if no one knows me. and especially if i only go to work and back home.
  • 1
    @Nanos randomized A* algorithm
  • 2
    @irene Nice, you are officially better than me.

    if you share how it looks, im sure community can supply you ideas how you can extend it, if you want.

    Just dont stop and dont set your goals too high. Just tiny bit higher than last success. I know you dont have energy for anything, but try to feel satisfaction from something. It can really fuel person. (I know becouse I was once writing encrypted chat in c++ while learning networking and c++ and... man, that was one huge difficult thing, but when I actually managed to send over anything and it worked, and custom created protocol worked, I quickly started learning QT to bring it to GUI life from terminal. I failed/abandoned project at some point but I coded like 2 weeks in nights)
  • 1
    @M1sf3t

    Not even close. :-)

    Unrelated links:

    https://youtube.com/watch/...

    > Steam powered bike

    https://youtube.com/watch/...

    > A UK pensioner built his own

    > steam-powered bike

    You'll see more with my other username sometime..
  • 3
    @irene the point of mindlessly wandering around the video game is the same as it is with physical exercise. The human body has this weird quirk where the lazier you let it get, the lazier it will get. The only way to counter it is through exercise.

    Exercise, realistic exercise, doesn't start off with grand goals or schemes, its starts off with doing something small and then building from their based on what your limitations are. Eventually you build small goals and work towards then move on to bigger goals. Over time, you find yourself strong enough to take on real world scenarios and not just exercises.
  • 3
    @DubbaThony the maze renders as you traverse it. coins (yellow Os) render at a certain distance and hide if outside that distance
  • 2
    @irene nice.

    First thing I can suggest is obvious, add time passed, I suppose win condition is having all coins.

    So simple small improvements.

    Score based on time.
    High score, maybe top 3 high scores.
    Do some pixel arts to represent player and coins.
    Maybe search through web for royality free sound to put in?
    Maybe form less trivial things camera that follows you and it uncovers nearby stuff, so you have to literally scout through but you dont see the "hidden" areas.
    extending above, minimap of found areas.

    even simple maze game can be extended a lot. And these ideas are just you know, figured out quickly ;)

    EDIT:
    jusst figured out you used terminal, not engine. So try doing it in godot (IMHO its actually harder lol)
  • 1
    @DubbaThony it's a console. there is no art in it other than symbols.
  • 2
    Yeah, just figured it out, see edit :/

    so you can try godot or anything else, look what seems most readable to you (and dont hate UI tools, they deserve hate but when you are trying to use its good to pretend they are your ally)
  • 1
    @irene you know now that I think about it, playing devRant would seem to be a good mental exercise as well. Not quite as much blood and gore tho 😂
  • 0
    @M1sf3t

    devrant scrapper to make simple devrant API?

    okay, I absolutely suck and understanding what you mean ;-;
  • 0
    @M1sf3t playing devrant?
  • 0
    @irene

    Nice @ game picture.
  • 0
    @irene

    > i only go to work and back home.

    Car pool ?

    (Split fuel costs for example.)
  • 0
    @irene

    > if no one knows me.

    Probably want to avoid driving slowly with your window open and chatting to random women on the street. :-)

    https://avvo.com/legal-answers/...

    Maybe you could have a vehicle where there is a local meetup group associated with it.

    A bit of research might answer some questions such as, which kind of vehicle will you find the most single women in a group ?

    I don't know the answer to that one, but its probably related to how expensive the vehicle is..
  • 0
    @DubbaThony

    I thought it already had an API ?
  • 0
    @irene

    I'm a big fan of console stuff, much less complicated than all that pixel stuff !
  • 1
    @Nanos well, I'm not going to buy a petroleum car anyway. Too much additional costs.
  • 0
    @irene

    Is why I haven't got a car, expensive !

    How about a bicycle ?

    If you get a tandem, you could give a lift. :-)

    Or maybe you could get an electric car, but only perhaps if you have access to free electricity..
  • 0
    @irene

    What language did you write your maze game in ?
  • 1
    @Nanos also a car costs as much as a small apartment.
  • 1
    @Nanos it was C#
  • 0
    @irene

    Indeed !

    One of the reasons I'm building my own.
  • 0
    @irene

    Roughly how many lines of code was it, and how long in hours do you reckon it took you ?
  • 0
    @irene

    Any monsters in the maze ?
  • 1
    @Nanos not many. Just a few hundreds.
  • 1
    @Nanos no monsters. Just a maze.
  • 0
    @Nanos I dont know, I didnt look for it.
  • 1
    @DubbaThony not entirely that specific

    @irene wanders around devRant, makes a comment here, a rant there, gets a few relatable and relevant, yet generic (no offense anyone) responses then along comes someone with something different to say and next thing you know, look a quest...
  • 0
    @M1sf3t a quest to argue with someone?
  • 0
    @irene

    I vote for the following features to be added:

    Monsters.

    Related link:

    https://gameinternals.com/post/...
  • 1
    @irene i was thinking more project ideas. When did y'all start arguing, I'm a little behind.

    It would seem that the thunderstorm overhead has everyone in the county rained out and home from work today. Or they're at work watching youtube because everyone else is at home 🙄
  • 3
    Oh same, man.
    I lose interest in everything really quickly. Cannot get anything done these days. Cannot concentrate, weird intrusive thoughts. Pressure inside my head. Or absolute silence. It’s like I cannot articulate thoughts inside my head, sometimes. I either feel angry or really sleepy.
  • 1
    Advice from another person who doesn't like humans https://youtube.com/watch/... (it's not me)
  • 0
    @Chrupiter

    I like cycling, as you get to sit down. :-)

    Plus you can add electric motors..
  • 2
    @Nanos motorized is about the only way I can cycle anymore unfortunately. My knee has a tendency to forget which direction its supposed to pivot in when I pedal.
  • 1
    Get someone pregnant.
  • 2
    @rutee07

    You know, some places pay you for your sperm !

    And if you go on the unofficial market, you can get even more !

    I was once offered $10k for mine.

    But after seeking legal advice, I decided against it. (Child support payments could still be demanded of $250k..)
  • 1
    @Nanos Really? You still have to pay child support if they got your sperm from the sperm bank? I think they should have records of that when someone orders your sperm and goes through the implantation.
  • 2
  • 1
  • 1
    @rutee07

    That kinda approach doesn't work so well for a guy..

    I'm aiming for something like this:
  • 0
    @Nanos

    Though at the moment, I'm a bit more like:
  • 1
    @rutee07 it is more complicated than it sounds.
  • 1
    @irene

    I've got a life like that !
  • 1
    @Nanos that works well until you get in front of a crowd and you do something ridiculously dumb and end up flat on your ass in front of everyone 😂
  • 0
    @irene Getting someone pregnant?
  • 0
  • 1
    @irene getting someone pregnant is definitely not the complicated part of that equation 🙄
  • 0
    @M1sf3t there are two possibilities: 1) consensual sex; 2) rape.

    For first one I'm not attractive enough for women to engage in such activity.

    For the second one I'm not physically strong to force anyone.

    So, I'm screwed anyway.
  • 1
    @irene
    Trust me, possibility #1 allways exists, becouse people are different.

    And more males than you think care more about mind and less about body.

    My girl isn't really attractive for today's standards but often do cute things and just fits what I like and most importantly, mentally, well that's what I wanted from life before I met her, so yeah. And we both are quite fat lol.

    So no offense, but "im to ugly" means nothing. There is nothing like beeing too ugly. Your self-esteem is just low enough you dont belive it's possible that someone will like you, and thats it. Its your personal opinion about you, you dont like your looks, but that's where it begins and ends, its not any form of any fact that nobody will like you or some shiet like that.
  • 1
    @DubbaThony bear in mind, I'm not a female. That changes all the things drastically :D
  • 1
    @irene

    Didn't know that but that means it's actually even easier for ya, bruh. Just dont look for girl forcefully like some do. I think everyone has time to time occasion to literally just effordlessly get to know one that will be fine ;)

    Me, as no-life antisocial guy, who wont stick nose from monitor when it's not nessesary, person who meets literally less than 5 people on regular basis (excluding work related shit etc.) somehow managed to just.. be in right place in right time. It happenes, its not miracle, its pure probability. It's just not immidiet ;)

    Assumed from nickname and avatar you are female.
  • 1
    @DubbaThony I've managed to be "in the right place" several times already. My lifetime luck reserves are depleted to NULL.
  • 0
    @DubbaThony and really I don't look for a girl at all. I have almost no attraction to girls. I can admire looks of a pretty female but my body does not react in sexual way to any girl I meet nowadays.
  • 1
    @irene

    Yeah, it's getting more and more normal. Its becouse your body may expect the mental part of girly girl, not the visual part.

    Girls these days are getting more and more into that race of making fuck ton of makeup and beeing as pretty as possible etc. Which in my honest opinion is biggest bullshit Ive seen in my life.

    My luck in my life few times also exceeded NULL, first unlucky thing I had in my life was I was born in family I was born in ;-;

    anyway, fuck it. I moved out and now I dont give a single flying fuck about them.

    Point is, if you endure you can get and conquer anything.
  • 1
    @DubbaThony maybe the main unlucky moment for me is not the family i was born in but the whole country.
  • 0
    @irene
    Dont worry, I hate my country too.
  • 0
    > beeing as pretty as possible etc.

    The complete opposite of my country..
  • 0
    @irene

    3) Sexbot.
  • 0
    @Nanos nah. It cannot be impregnated as rutee suggested.
  • 0
    @irene you shouldn't attribute so much to luck, the laws of attraction are far more complicated than any one person will ever grasp sure, but making the mistake of chalking it up to luck will only repeatedly cause fate to dangle something in front of you just to then slap you in the face with it.

    Individual men and women all have their quirks and fetishes but mature relationships, ie a relationship you would want to bring a child into, are built on security and trust and the most attractive candidates for these types of relationships are simply those that know who they are, handle their shit, stay out of drama, and take care of their body, both mentally and physically.

    Everything else is just an illusion created to sell movies and vice.
  • 1
    @M1sf3t

    > far more complicated than any one person

    > will ever grasp sure,

    I think they are pretty simple:

    Athletic body.

    Vehicle for transport.

    Enough disposable income. (After all living expenses are taken into account.) This is around $3,000+ USD a year.

    Geographically close enough that you can get from your place A to their place B within 20 to 40 minutes with your means of transport. (When they have 'the urge' to see you.)

    You get a bonus if you are over 6ft tall.

    Everything else doesn't appear to matter at all.

    You are competing with other males, so if anyone else has a better vehicle than you, is taller, higher disposable income, lives closer, then all those variables will come into play and the other person could be seen as a better choice.

    Doesn't matter what kind of person you are.
  • 1
    @M1sf3t no one seriously talked about raising a child here
  • 0
    @irene

    I've tried that, it is really difficult.

    I wouldn't recommend it unless you are pretty wealthy and can afford to hire staff.
  • 1
    @Nanos I'm not going for that ever.
  • 0
    @irene

    Have you had the snip to make sure that doesn't happen ?

    Though, in some rare cases, people have 3 tubes and they only cut 2, or one grows back..
  • 0
    @Nanos no, haven't yet. I've had no money before.
  • 0
    @Nanos and now I have no reason at all. I've had no encounters with females for 5 years.
  • 1
    @irene I realize that, I was mostly pointing out the significance of someone wanting a mature relationship over just a fling.

    @Nanos your essentially right about everything except the competition part. You can thank the jersey shore assholes and all the other player-wannabes for that.

    They rush out and check all those boxes to attract the girl then the girl comes along and discovers that the sharp ride is actually in mom's name along with place A. Or that they're over-extended and that large disposable income is only paycheck. Who knows, maybe the athletic body attracts more competition than they were prepared for.

    In any case, most people, both male and female, eventually come to realize that the grass is never greener and whats worse, the person fronting could care less because they got what they wanted, its now on to the next spot for them, with not a tear shed.
  • 1
    @M1sf3t people may realize something but instincts aren't sleeping anyway. And attraction is not consious at all.
  • 1
    @irene

    7 years for me.

    I've practically ran out of ways to try and disprove my theories..

    Interestingly this links in a way to another related item:

    https://devrant.com/rants/2096966/...
  • 1
    @irene your right it isn't. It's also not what people consciously see on the tv or internet either. Also being fit is not genetic and being financially secure is not inherited. Those things can help sure but they are not required. What is required for them is for you to kick the funk and get off your ass.

    Not that your not allowed to take a break every now and again but 5 years is a long break. Its most likely time to start taking steps to re-enter the land of the living. A daunting task, trust me I'm welll aware of it, but you have to start somewhere or otherwise your just going to be more and more miserable until you off yourself. Given that that option is always realistically on the table, I would try something else first personally.

    If physical exercise is too much, go with mental. If your like most, you'll eventually go stir crazy and find the urge to at least get up and go for a walk. Build that into a routine and then slowly work to a run.
  • 0
    @M1sf3t

    > except the competition part.

    I don't understand.

    Could you explain more.
  • 1
    @M1sf3t I have no options "on the table".
  • 1
    @M1sf3t

    --------

    otherwise your just going to be more and more miserable until you off yourself.

    --------

    This is a common thread among the many people I spoke to before they did so.

    One of my many hobbies..

    I'm also interested to study myself too, how far away am I from wanting to do the same..

    Well, considering how many decades I've taken to get here, it would be rather a waste to leave early !

    But that doesn't stop how you feel..

    To change that, is more difficult.

    I've some ideas, and testing some solutions, which appear to be having some positive effect, but always keen to find better solutions.

    Here helps some.
  • 0
    @Nanos the road maturity involves learning to appreciate what you have and accepting that you cant have everything.

    It also involves learning to trust that your partner is with you and not what you deem as their more attractive friends.
  • 1
    @irene

    FX [ Understands all too well limited table options. ]
  • 1
    @M1sf3t

    I notice many today in some cultures never reach maturity, and die lonely in their old age !

    By many, I should perhaps say, the vast majority, 100% everyone in certain groups..

    I've checked a few hundred thousand people, they are all immature !

    Well, apart from us. :-)
  • 2
    @M1sf3t

    I like computer games for mental exercise, and you can find others to chat to as well.

    I recommend LOTRO, its fun, and not too difficult, and older sensible people to chat with.

    And its free.
  • 1
    @Nanos I doubt people ever been mature.
  • 1
    That's all a lie.
  • 0
    @irene

    Any thoughts on how we could test if we ourselves are mature or not ?
  • 1
    @Nanos no need for test. I'm not mature. I'm so infantile that people tend to think I'm years younger than I am.
  • 1
    @Nanos i can believe it, look how fickle most societies are in general. Thats still no reason to take yourself out of the game thinking that everyone is.

    And feelings are influenced by exercise as much as they anything else. The point is to start small and make little accomplishments so that your body feels like it is useful again. Same with your mind, if your job is completely mind-numbing and your doing nothing else to stimulate your mind (redbull doesn't count @irene) then you are going to be depressed, there's no way around other than to change your habits and find something in which you feel productive again
  • 1
    @M1sf3t what if nothing makes me feel better at all?
  • 0
    @irene

    I think a person can be both infantile and mature.

    I've been both since I was around 4 I think..

    You sound mature to me..
  • 1
    @M1sf3t

    FX [ Nods in agreement about mind and body improvements. ]
  • 1
    @Nanos many people said I was more mature when I was a child. But actually I just wasn't a normal child at all, probably. And now are the consequences of that.
  • 0
    @Nanos I'm just a showoff shitbag without much skills or knowledge.
  • 0
    @irene

    You can do a lot with a little bit of skill and knowledge.
  • 0
    @Nanos not me.
  • 0
    @irene

    > consequences of that.

    I don't understand, what consequences are there ?

    Similar boat myself, so nice to be aware of things I'm not aware of !
  • 0
    @irene

    That isn't true, you showed us that C# game you wrote.

    Not everyone can do that.
  • 1
    @Nanos consequences are that I never had a proper childhood and never learned basic human skills. So now I'm egotistical and have little to no empathy or consideration of other humans but strongly believe that for every miniscule thing I'll be beaten for even trying anything.
  • 0
    ugh, @irene if you were off shitbag you wouldn't admitting that your a showoff shitbag 🤦🏻‍♂️
  • 0
    @M1sf3t or would I?
  • 0
    @irene no, maybe just a showoff but not a shitbag
  • 1
    @M1sf3t I'm also manipulative. Though that skill became much weaker with age.
  • 0
    @irene

    I also missed out in basic human skills. (What, you can't tell.. :-) )

    > So now I'm egotistical

    I'm not sure one follows the other.

    You might always have been like that. :-)

    > have little to no empathy or consideration

    > of other humans

    Everyone is like that really.

    > strongly believe that for every miniscule

    > thing I'll be beaten for even trying anything.

    Oh I know that one is true !

    I've made a lifetime of trying miniscule things and getting beaten constantly.

    But I try to learn from my mistakes (And others!) and look for niche spots where the competition is less and I might stand a decent chance.

    Was one of the big reasons for moving where I did, as I reckon my chances here are higher than average.

    Though no girlfriend here in 3 years, doesn't really bode well so far !

    But I think I can get one in 3 years time if I work really really hard.

    It's just hard to be motivated when I might simply be wrong..
  • 0
    @irene

    You remind me of my ex's :-)
  • 1
    @Nanos well, I've stopped trying. I'm tired of being psychically beaten. I just want some calmness (which never happens).
  • 0
    I'm reminded about:

    https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/...

    Which I only recently heard about.

    Obviously, must be on the reading list in some schools..
  • 0
    @Nanos in which way?
  • 1
    @Nanos yes. It's that thing.
  • 0
    @irene

    My ex's was very manipulative.

    I think its standard for a specific gender..
  • 0
    @irene you must've came crashing down from pretty high up there?
  • 0
    @Nanos which I am not a part of.
  • 0
    @M1sf3t probably. I don't really understand what do you mean.
  • 1
    @irene

    > I just want some calmness

    > (which never happens).

    FX [ Hugs. ]

    I ponder when I get to my retirement age, I might just give up trying and sit around all day in my slippers watching TV..

    FX [ Notices he is sitting in his slippers currently watching TV.. ]
  • 0
    @irene i mean you were well on you way to reachin the summit an someone swept the whole goddamned mountain out from under you
  • 1
    @Nanos

    My mind is fighting my instincts.

    Instincts say, slippers + TV..

    Mind says, programming and sex.
  • 0
    @M1sf3t I cannot verify. I don't remember much from my past. Probably a psychological block.
  • 1
    @irene yea that sounds about right, i blocked out most of mine too. helps cope with how hard you landed and the resulting pts when you start trying to find your feet again.
  • 0
    @irene

    Forgetting things I reckon can actually be healthy.
  • 2
    @Nanos Ive been attempting to pack for the happy trails caravan for over an hour now. I got a weight limit of 100lbs including all guns and ammo.

    Which would be quite physically straining in real life i might add. I don't even think a saw gunner's loadout is quite that much. Idk maybe the new world they have super human strength due to radiation. Or maybe their scale isnt the same as ours, the notation just happened to survive the war 🤔
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