I'm so annoyed.

Now I can't even have an online portfolio, publish articles, or just any kind of online presence for my career. First, I receive emails from exes. Now, my relatives. They can't find me in other social media so they google me instead, find my website, and try to contact me there. It sucks because my projects are picking up some attention and one of the reasons I find it easy to land a job is because companies can search for my name and see my work. For that to be turned into a burden is just another thing they try to take away from me. I have no life. I can't have one. They will always follow.

I am already paranoid that the people emailing me regarding code are just them posing as someone else which doesn't help my confidence at all. Some of the LinkedIn recruiters who ask for my contact number could be them. At this point, all I can do is ignore. Just push through with my projects, have zero online presence unless code related, and just fucking hope they get tired eventually although it's been half a decade of silence from me.

It's so fucked up how disrespectful these people are. No matter how many times you tell them to fuck off, they still try to sabotage all your efforts of having a life or career from a distance. Also, how convenient that you're reaching out to me after a typhoon. I guess you need money and you immediately thought of that "one rich relative who want nothing to do with us but blood is thicker than water so she will definitely help us".

Fuck you. Fuck off.

Leeches. Leeches everywhere.

  • 14
    Their excuse, "I dreamed about you. It's been four years, we miss you." Lol. The convenience of this dream happening after a calamity, after four years of silence.
  • 8
    Staying silent will work best, I guess.

    Besides, feel invited to watch a nice romantic DVD. You know, with a Linux ISO. ^^
  • 4
    Official name change? Or use a penname
  • 4
    @donuts uhh exciting! designing a whole new identity from scratch.
  • 4
    I hate it how ”blood is thicker than water” is now understood completely the opposite of what it means, since it’s short for ”the blood of the covenant is thicker than water of the womb”...

    Anyway that sounds real annoying...
  • 2
    @heyheni given all the dirt the govt and tech companies have already collected from you, maybe not a bad idea?

    I at least nuked fb... I hope.... At least now I don't owe $80 for ads I never intended to place....
  • 3
    I have the same issue. My ex wife abused and cheated on me for years until I filed for divorce in 2018. She refused to sign the papers until February of this year and she still stalks me and my life, I get calls from random females that shes stalked, harassed, and threatened after other men had left her since and it's almost terrifying. Yesterday, she showed up in my tiktok stream, and twitch stream prompting me to get the hell off. Be safe, my guy.
  • 2
    🥺 that is the worst, I'm sorry you're going through this. You know where to find me if you need to vent. I have hugs and cookies ❤️
  • 3
    Change your screen profile name to Donald Trump, Jr. I guarantee NOBODY will email you!

    In all honesty, just ignore the bullshit. You say you're starting to get hits from legit companies. Focus on that. It's a lesson of life to separate the wheat from the chaff.
  • 3
    @donuts That sounds exciting but I can't think of a name. Also, I don't like the idea of hiding when I did nothing wrong. By the way the internet works, my new presence with my new name would probably be suggested to them at some point because you know, "let's connect everyone and relive old trauma, look how smart our algorithm is".

    Maybe it would be my last resort.
  • 2
    @ihavePCSD Guilt, regret, misery, etc. I would hate to be in their position. They inspire me not to be an asshole to other people. Take care, my dude. These people are garbage.
  • 1
    @Elyz Thank you, my love.
  • 0
    @bols59 I learned a new word. Didn't know those were called chaff. Thanks, man.
  • 1
    @rutee07 well the suggestion part just don't use social media?

    And suggested fine, but if you profile is private, nothing should be visible unless you actually connect?

    But yes would be really don't trouble depending how big ur network is.

    For me I wanted to unlike a lot of things but FB doesn't let you bulk.... So easier just to delete ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
  • 1
    @donuts I mean LinkedIn makes it easy for me to get contacts and effortlessly receive interview invites. I remember creating a new account with a new number and email address, only for exes to start viewing my profile on the first day. I assume my profile was being suggested because I also see some past people suggested to me.

    If I delete it, I'd be closing my door to a lot of valuable connections and opportunities. They can't view my full profile without being connected first but they'd still see my face and new name.

    Yeah, Facebook sucks, same with everything else they bought - WhatsApp, Instagram, etc. I've avoided them for years and yet here I am still having problems. Haha. The only solution is to become a hermit online and offline. :D
  • 1
    @rutee07 Ah OK... yes LinkedIn is harder. Forgot about that. Not sure what I'd do if I ever lose my job...

    Maybe you could try threatening them, saying their activity is stalking and next time you will have them arrested.

    Something to just scare them away.
  • 2
    @donuts Yes, haha. This actually worked with some guy who's been stalking me online. Telling him to fuck off didn't work. Ignoring him for years didn't work. I lost my patience and threatened him that I will forward all his emails to his family and colleagues and good luck finding a job. I have not heard from him since.

    My relatives have no shame though. They think they're right but I think I have enough dirty laundry to shut them up. It's sad that only shit like this works but thanks.
  • 1
    Dam, that's hard
  • 1

    I ignored the email and decided that if they harass me further, I will threaten them with a restraining order. Today, I got a view on LinkedIn. Keep in mind that earlier, they emailed me through my portfolio (website). Now, they are trying to reach me through LinkedIn. The desperation and the lack of empathy that those are profiles I use for my career and they still shit on them.

    My nephew is in high school, zero connections, fresh account, and there is no way that's really him. There is so much child abuse and manipulation in that clan that I can almost imagine how it all went down. They probably ordered him to create the profile and try to message me because "she didn't respond to me but she has a soft spot for you". Too late, my dearies, thanks to you, my soft spot can be switched on and off easily.

    I want to report this behavior so bad but manipulating a kid is not something the law cares about unless it's hardcore sex or violence. I blocked the account.
  • 1

    Received another email, this time from my cousin telling me how much she loves me and even giving me her contact number if I wanted to talk. It's like they've been trying to find me on Facebook and now one of them discovered "this Google thing" and they went all out. Been there, done that. I know damn well that it's a trap. No more emotional manipulation. I know that as soon as you get my number, you would dismantle my life just like you're attempting to now.

    Disgusting. Now I'm just laughing. The collective delusion of these people has further convinced me that I made the right decision of staying the fuck away from them.
  • 0
    Now the same cousin tried to add me on LinkedIn and I also blocked the shit out of her. Damn, they all dreamed of me all at the same time? I must be really stupid to believe this.
  • 1
    Damn, that's low using kids like that :-( As you say though, the whole "I just dreamed of you" thing gets less and less believable the more they try, and it was already about a 0/10 on the believability scale when they started.

    I'm not sure there's a good answer here - it sucks, and I feel for you. Ping me if you need to chat anytime.

    Only other practical piece of advice I can think of is to maybe grab another mobile number you use as a disposable, "unsafe" one when random recruiters contact you on Linkedin. That way if the worst happens and said leeches do get hold of it, you trash it, pick up a new disposable one and all that's happened is you've lost touch with a few crappy recruiters. Dual sim phones make that even more convenient.
  • 1
    @AlmondSauce Thanks. I have trouble accidentally texting from one sim to another with a dual sim phone though so I might use an old phone that's working really slow anyway. If they still find my number in some way then I have more proof that they are crazy.

    I'm still consulting with a lawyer to see if there's anything I can do for now. Right now, I feel disrespected and not taken seriously. Maybe getting a lawyer would nail it into their brains that I'm dead serious.
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