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Search - "broken link"
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You know what?
Young cocky React devs can suck my old fuckin LAMP and Objective-C balls.
Got a new freelance job and got brought in to triage a React Native iOS/Android app. Lead dev's first comment to me is: "Bro, have you ever used React Native".
To which I had to reply to save my honor publicly, "No, but I have like 8 years with Objective-C and 3 years with Swift, and 3 years with Node, so I maybe I'll still be able help. Sometimes it just helps to have a fresh set of eyes."
"Well, nobody but me can work on this code."
And that, as it turned out was almost true.
After going back and forth with our PM and this dev I finally get his code base.
"Just run "npm install" he says".
Like no fuckin shit junior... lets see if that will actually work.
Node 14... nope whole project dies.
Node 12 LTS... nope whole project dies.
Install all of react native globally because fuck it, try again... still dies.
Node 10 LTS... project installs but still won't run or build complaining about some conflict with React Native libraries and Cocoa pods.
Go back to my PM... "Um, this project won't work on any version of Node newer than about 5 years old... and even if it did it still won't build, and even if it would build it still runs like shit. And even if we fix all of that Apple might still tell us to fuck off because it's React Native.
Spend like a week in npm and node hell just trying to fucking hand install enough dependencies to unfuck this turds project.
All the while the original dev is still trying TO FIX HIS OWN FUCKING CODE while also being a cocky ass the entire time. Now, I can appreciate a cocky dev... I was horrendously cocky in my younger days and have only gotten marginally better with age. But if you're gonna be cocky, you also have to be good at it. And this guy was not.
Lo, we're not done. OG Dev comes down with "Corona Virus"... I put this in quotes because the dude ends up drawing out his "virus" for over 4 months before finally putting us in touch with "another dev team he sometimes uses".
Next, me and my PM get on a MS Teams call with this Indian house. No problems there, I've worked with the Indians before... but... these are guys are not good. They're talking about how they've already built the iOS build... but then I ask them what they did to sort out the ReactNative/Cocoa Pods conflict and they have no idea what I'm talking about.
Why?
Well, one of these suckers sends a link to some repo and I find out why. When he sends the link it exposes his email...
This Indian dude's emails was our-devs-name@gmail.com...
We'd been played.
Company sued the shit out of the OG dev and the Indian company he was selling off his work to.
I rewrote the app in Swift.
So, lets review... the React dev fucked up his own project so bad even he couldn't fix it... had to get a team of Indians to help who also couldn't fix it... was still a dickhead to me when I couldn't fix it... and in the end it was all so broken we had to just do a rewrite.
None of you get npm. None of you get React. None of you get that doing the web the way Mark Zucherberg does it just makes you a choad locked into that ecosystem. None of you can fix your own damn projects when one of the 6,000 dependency developers pushes breaking changes. None of you ever even bother with "npm audit fix" because if security was a concern you'd be using a server side language for fucking server side programming like a grown up.
So, next time a senior dev with 20 years exp. gets brought in to help triage a project that you yourself fucked up... Remember that the new thing you know and think makes you cool? It's not new and it's not cool. It's just JavaScript on the server so you script kiddies never have to learn anything but JavaScript... which makes you inarguably worse programmers.
And, MF, I was literally writing javascript while you were sucking your mommas titties so just chill... this shit ain't new and I've got a dozen of my own Node daemons running right now... difference is?
Mine are still working.34 -
Me: "We should remove that popup"
Marketer: "But our A/B testing statistics show a 14% increase in signups to our newsletter, and people who get our newsletter are 4% more likely to buy something"
Me: "0.14x0.04... so slightly more than half a percent improvement. And you also qualitatively measured how many people decide to never visit the page again, just because of that popup? Did you measure the how many internet users with adblockers run into a broken webpage? Did you measure the amount of emails to support from users who can't unsubscribe from the newsletter because there is no unsubscribe link?"
Marketer: "Why would they want to unsubscribe? The newsletter adds value to our users!"
Me: 😩26 -
Although this is gonna sound like bullshit, this happened to me for real. Since that moment I use even more backup services AND I regularly check EVERYTHING.
Had a backup of my important data (still used mainstream services back then) on:
- Hotmail email attachments
- Google Drive
(Both link to another email account).
- A few data backup services
- DVD
- USB
- External HDD.
I wanted to copy some backup data over again:
1. Walk to my staple of HDD's, tried to grab it, somehow missed and knocked the whole fucking pile over. HDD broken.
2. Well fuck, let's go put some of my clothes in the washing machine for clean clothes at study/monday. After this shit being in the washing machine for just a few minutes, I realized my backup USB stick was in one of my pockets, in the washing machine. FUCK. Couldn't stop it so I waited till the end, tried it and well, it wasn't working at all anymore.
Fuck my fucking life slightly right now.
3. *remembers about the backup disc*. I forgot to keep it in its case, very deep scratches and so on, unreadable. FUCKING FUCK.
4. Right, I still have those online services! *tries to login to all of them (including hotmail/gdrive) but forgot the password. Well, let's login to my backup account then (hadn't used that one in years). Account was suspended for some reason.
Started to get really anxious because every online backup service was linked to that email address.
Contacted customer support. They really couldn't restore it because of some issues they weren't allow to tell me. Sorry but I couldn't retain access.
5. Well this is fucked up. Couldn't get into any of the backup/hotmail/gdrive accounts anymore.
I tried contacting their support but never got any replies.
This was the moment I realized I fucked up big fucking time because damn, this stuff at this level hardly happens to anyone.
FUCK.39 -
--- GitHub 24-hour outage post mortem ---
As many of you will remember; Github fell over earlier this month and cracked its head on the counter top on the way down. For more or less a full 24 hours the repo-wrangling behemoth had inconsistent data being presented to users, slow response times and failing requests during common user actions such as reporting issues and questioning your career choice in code reviews.
It's been revealed in a post-mortem of the incident (link at the end of the article) that DB replication was the root cause of the chaos after a failing 100G network link was being replaced during routine maintenance. I don't pretend to be a rockstar-ninja-wizard DBA but after speaking with colleagues who went a shade whiter when the term "replication" was used - It's hard to predict where a design decision will bite back and leave you untanging the web of lies and misinformation reported by the databases for weeks if not months after everything's gone a tad sideways.
When the link was yanked out of the east coast DC undergoing maintenance - Github's "Orchestrator" software did exactly what it was meant to do; It hit the "ohshi" button and failed over to another DC that wasn't reporting any issues. The hitch in the master plan was that when connectivity came back up at the east coast DC, Orchestrator was unable to (un)fail-over back to the east coast DC due to each cluster containing data the other didn't have.
At this point it's reasonable to assume that pants were turning funny colours - Monitoring systems across the board started squealing, firing off messages to engineers demanding they rouse from the land of nod and snap back to reality, that was a bit more "on-fire" than usual. A quick call to Orchestrator's API returned a result set that only contained database servers from the west coast - none of the east coast servers had responded.
Come 11pm UTC (about 10 minutes after the initial pant re-colouring) engineers realised they were well and truly backed into a corner, the site was flipped into "Yellow" status and internal mechanisms for deployments were locked out. 5 minutes later an Incident Co-ordinator was dragged from their lair by the status change and almost immediately flipped the site into "Red" status, a move i can only hope was accompanied by all the lights going red and klaxons sounding.
Even more engineers were roused from their slumber to help with the recovery effort, By this point hair was turning grey in real time - The fail-over DB cluster had been processing user data for nearly 40 minutes, every second that passed made the inevitable untangling process exponentially more difficult. Not long after this Github made the call to pause webhooks and Github Pages builds in an attempt to prevent further data loss, causing disruption to those of us using Github as a way of kicking off our deployment processes (myself included, I had to SSH in and run a git pull myself like some kind of savage).
Glossing over several more "And then things were still broken" sections of the post mortem; Clever engineers with their heads screwed on the right way successfully executed what i can only imagine was a large, complex and risky plan to untangle the mess and restore functionality. Github was picked up off the kitchen floor and promptly placed in a comfy chair with a sweet tea to recover. The enormous backlog of webhooks and Pages builds was caught up with and everything was more or less back to normal.
It goes to show that even the best laid plan rarely survives first contact with the enemy, In this case a failing 100G network link somewhere inside an east coast data center.
Link to the post mortem: https://blog.github.com/2018-10-30-...7 -
Once we were going to present a web service to governmental firm. All is going well so far and my boss asks me to host the web application the day before the presentation.
I hosted it and all was good with demo production tests, but I had a bad feeling.
While it was running on our server, I also ran it locally with a reverse proxy just in case.
* Meeting starts *
* Ice broken and down to business *
"And now our developer will run the demo for you..."
* Run the demo from my laptop to double check --> 500 Internal Server Error *
Holy shit!!!
* Opens reverse proxy link on my laptop. Present demo during meeting. Demo works like a charm. *
Firm representative: "Great! Looking forward to go live."
*Our team walks out*
GM: "Good job guys"
ME:4 -
DO NOT USE JAVASCRIPT FOR PUBLIC WEBSITES IF YOU DON'T KNOW HOW TO USE IT!!!
Almost every fucking day, I click a fucking button and NOTHING HAPPENS. I open the console and find tens of JavaScript errors, that *I* have to debug and fix in order to proceed.
FUR FUCK SAKE, JavaScript is not strictly needed, those fucking React and Vue are also not needed. Just now I wanted to download a form: IT'S A FUCKING PDF FILE, why the fuck are you putting your broken JavaScript function to let me download it!? PUT A FUCKING DOWNLOAD LINK YOU FUCKING MORON!
Nobody is forcing anybody to use JavaScript or those fucking fancy frameworks, SO WHY THE FUCK PEOPLE OVERCOMPLICATE THINGS THAT USED TO WORK SO WELL!14 -
Microsoft Internet Explorer is my least favorite enterprise software. We are forced to use it. I hate being forced. This is like being asked to climb a mountain with a broken leg...not fun, painful, hopeless, threatening, discouraging, slow, and ugly, and infected...it is downright evil corporate bullshit.
<!--[if IE]>
<link rel="styleshit" type=trash/css" href="die-die-die-you-evil-bastard.css"/>
<![endif]-->
Just push it over the edge with a chrome sword stuck in its back. I will just sit here by the fire with my pet fox and watch the opera as I listen to vivaldi.3 -
A friend found this Microsoft link a few weeks ago. The background image is missing because it's been removed from imgur and it's still broken to date 🤔
https://microsoft.com/upgradecenter...8 -
I took a civil service exam October last year, the list of passers where posted in the government website last December. My name wasn't on the list. I was heart broken. :'(
I wasn't able to apply for the job I wanted. I thought that I'm so stupid I can't even pass an exam.
I was depressed for almost a month.
Then yesterday, a friend of mine was searching google since I refuse to tell her my middle name.
Suddenly she exclaimed, wow! you're a civil service exam passer!
I was shocked beyond belief!
I checked the website, my name is still not there. HAHA. (deep inside it hurts)
I cursed my friend for trolling me but she swear that it's true. She sent me the link and BOOM! my name is on the list of APRIL passers!
WHAT THE HECK???
i just verified through phone that I actually passed and that it was an error on their website that included me on the wrong list. I don't know whether to be angry or pleased. lol XDundefined error404 name not found oops it's there...wrong error. i passed oh my gosh after 6 months good news8 -
Client:
"Ok,. so your saying that its gonna take you 63 hrs to create a simplified CRM with basic functionality and auto fill docs or automated work flow docs as an added feature?"
My response (after already under-quoting and planning on cutting some corners because he has a smaller budget than normally necessary):
"It sounds simpler than it is. There are a lot of things I need to take into account that you wouldn't even think about.
For instance:
Making sure your emails don't go to the client's spam folder. This requires the sending domain to be verified via DNS settings. I have to ensure your email content passes a spam test (link to text ratio needs to be good). I assumed you'd want an email that has your logo and looks good. This means testing the design in Outlook to make sure it's not broken.
What if the email doesn't send due to an invalid email address, or bounces back? You'll need to be notified.
What if the client list for the week contains duplicates? You need them merged or ignored.
Generating a PDF from HTML can be tricky because the conversion isn't apples to apples so there are things I need to adjust to make them as close as possible.
Making a site completely mobile friendly (the tier 3 option) can be very time consuming as well. It's not about whether or not it fits on a mobile phone, it's about whether or not it's intuitive and useful. You're essentially getting a mobile app without paying for separate development of an app.
If I took everything into consideration and built this to be 100% bullet proof, it would cost tens of thousands.
I'm doing my best to leverage your needs with the probability of running into an issue. I'm not going waste my time/your money on something that will likely never happen."9 -
>>>> Followed link to a post
* Do you Accept Cookies?: Yes
* Our customer supports online: Okay, I know
* Subscribe to Newsletters?: Click Click Accept
* Website wants to turn on Notification?: Okay
* Seen Our New Product?: No, not today
* We require you to be over 18?: Yes, I am
* We value your privacy?: I Agree
* Looks like you're using ad-Blocker?: Turn Off
* Don't forget to follow us on...: Okay!!! I get it already, just show me the f*cking post!
* What next
***** 1 million ads appear around a single post broken to bits having (1-2-3-4-5-6-7-8-9 next>>) *****
Just wondering who invented this money making strategy.8 -
Everytime 🙄
Client: it's not working.
Me: what isn't
Client: the app video and link thing locator
Me: device and spec ? Like I always need
Client:iPhone
Me: yes. What one and what version of iOS
Client: urm 6s iOS 10 something
Me: great 😏 not broken for me
Client: well everyone is complaining so we need it fixed.
What can i even do now 😐7 -
Rant about my application - mate thinks he can add features that are insanely hard to implement. Dare initiated. $150 if he does it, he buys me 3 rounds if he looses.
Proceed to give him the link to the repo. He downloads it and runs it in VS. Complains that it doesn't work and is broken...
"Have you installed the frameworks?"
"What frameworks"...1 -
TLDR: crappy api + idiot ex client combo rant // devam si duška
I saw a lot of people bitching about APIs that don't return proper response codes and other stuff..
Well let me tell you a story. I used to work on a project where we had to do something like booking, but better..crossbreed with the Off&Away bidding site (which btw we had to rip off the .js stuff and reverse engineer the whole timer thingy), using free versions of everything..even though money wasn't an issue (what our client said). Same client decided to go with transhotel because it was sooooo gooood... OK? Why did noone heard of them then?
Anyhow, the api was xml based.. we had to send some xml that was validated against a schema, we received another that was supposed to be validated againts another schema.. and so on and so on..
...
...
supposed..
The API docs were nonexistent.. What was there, was broken English or Spanish.. Even had some comments like Add This & that to chapter xy.. Of course that chapter didn't even exist yet. :( And the last documentation they had, was really really old..more than a year, with visible gaps, we got the validation schemas not even listed in the docs, let alone described properly.
Yaaay! And that was not everything.. besides wrong and missing data, the API itself caused the 500 server error whenever you were no longer authenticated.
Of course it didn't tell you that your session was dead.. Just pooof! Unhandled crap everywhere!
And the best part?! We handled that login after inspecting what the hell happened, but sent the notification to the company anyways.. We had a conf call, and sent numerous emails explaining to them what a 'try catch' is and how they should handle the not authenticated error <= BTW they should have had a handled xml response for that, we got the schema for it! But they didn't. Anyhow, after two agonizing days talking back and forth they at least set up the server to be available again after the horrified 500 error. Before, it even stopped responding until reset (don't ask me how they managed to do that).
Oh yeah, did I mention this was a worldwide renown company?! Where everybody spoke/wrote English?! Yup, they have more than 700 people there, of course they speak English! <= another one of my ex clients fabulous statements... making me wanna strangle him with his tie.. I told him I am not talking to them because no-one there understood/spoke English and it would be a waste of my time.. Guess who spent almost 3 hours to talk to someone who sounded like a stereotypical Indian support tech guy with a flue speaking Italian?! // no offence please for the referenced parties!!
So yeah, sadly I don't have SS of the fucked up documentation..and I cannot post more details (not sure if the NDA still holds even though they canceled the project).. Not that I care really.. not after I saw how the client would treat his customers..
Anywayz I found on the interwebz some proof that this shitty api existed..
picture + link: https://programmableweb.com/api/...
SubRant: the client was an idiot! Probably still is, but no longer my client..
Wanted to store the credit card info + cvc and owner info etc.. in our database.. for easier second payment, like on paypal (which he wanted me to totally customize the payment page of paypal, and if that wasn't possible to collect user data on our personalized payment page and then just send it over to paypal api, if possible in plaintext, he just didn't care as long as he got his personalized payment page) or sth.... I told the company owner that they are fucking retards if they think they can pull this off & that they will lose all their (potential) clients if they figure that out.. or god forbid someone hacked us and stole the data.. I think this shit is also against the law..
I think it goes without saying what happened next.. called him ignorant stupid fucktard to his face and told him I ain't doing that since our company didn't even had a certificate to store the last 4 numbers.. They heard my voice over the whole firm.. we had fish-tank like offices, so they could all see me yelling at the director..
Guess who got laid off due to not being needed anymore the next day?! It was the best day of my life..so far!! Never have I been happier to lose my job!!
P.S. all that crap + test + the whole backand for analysis, the whole crm + campaign emails etc.. the client wanted done in 6 months.. O.o
P.P.S. almost shat my pants when devRant notified my I cannot post and wanted to copy the message and then everything disappeard.. thank god I have written this in the n++ xDundefined venting big time issues no documentation idiot xml security api privacy ashole crappy client rant11 -
applying for a job at a company whose website is broken is kinda ironic
Todays gems are
- the menu item jobs isn't clickable. I have to find a link elsewhere
- the application form has a second page a "this is what you entered" page. It switches month and day of my birthday. I returned to first page to check. Here it's still fine. Now I needed to reupload my attachments because the "field is empty" - lets see if they get my CV twice
- the jobs page doesn't even load. firefox eventually prompts "This site is slowing down the browser ... [stop]"6 -
Oh gee whiz fellas. I lived through my nightmare. Recently too.
(Multiple rants over last few months are merged in this one. Couldn't rant earlier because my login didn't work.)
I joined a new shithole recently.
It was a huge change because my whole tech stack changed, and on top of that the application domain was new too.
Boss: ho hey newbie, here take this task which is a core service redesign and implementation and finish it in two weeks because it has to be in production for a client.
Normally I'd be able to provide a reasonable analysis and estimate. But being new and unaware of how things work here, I just said 'cool, I'll try my best.' (I was aware that it was a big undertaking but didn't realize the scope and the alarming lack of support I'd get and the bullshit egos I'd have to deal with)
Like a mad man I worked 17+ hours a day with barely a day off every week and changed and produced a lot of code, most of it of decent quality.
Deadline came and went by. Got extended because it was impossible (and fake).
All the time my manager is continuously building pressure on me. When I asked questions I never got any direct/clear answers. On asking for help, I'd get an elaborate word vomit of what was already known/visible. Yet I finally managed to have an implementation ready.
Reviewer: You haven't added parameter comments on your functions and there aren't enough comments in code. We follow standards. Clean code and whatnot. Care for the craft verbal diarrhea.
Boss: Ho hey anux, do you think we'll be able to push the code to production?
Me: Nope. We care for the craft and have standards. We need to add redundant comments to self documented code first, because that is of utmost importance as Nuthead reviewer explained.
(what I wish I had said)
What I actually said: No, code is not reviewed yet.
And despite examples of functions which were not documented (which were written by the reviewer nut), I added 6-7 lines of comments for my single line functions describing how e.g. Sum takes two input integers and returns their sum and asked for a review again.
Reviewer: See this comment is better written as this same-meaning-but-slightly-longer way. Can we please add full stops everywhere even though they were not there to begin with? Can we please not follow this pattern and instead promote our anti-pattern? Thanks.
Me: Changed the comments. Added full stops. Here's a link for why this anti-pattern is bad.
Reviewer: you have written such beautiful code with such little gems. Brilliant. It's great to see how my mentoring has honed your skills.
.
.
.
I swear I would have broken a CRT on his stupid face if we weren't working remotely (and if I had a CRT).
It infuriates me how the solution to every problem with this guy is 'add a comment'.
What enrages me more is that I actually thought I could learn from this guy (in the beginning). My self doubt just made me burnout for little in return.
Thankfully this living nightmare will soon be over.rant fuck you shitty reviewer micromanagement by micrococks wk279 living nightmare fml glassdoor reviews don't lie9 -
PayPal = GayPal
PHASE 1
1. I create my personal gaypal account
2. I use my real data
3. Try to link my debit card, denied
4. Call gaypal support via international phone number
5. Guy asks me for my full name email phone number debit card street address, all confirmed and verified
6. Finally i can add my card
PAHSE 2
7. Now the account is temporarily limited and in review, for absolutely no fucking reason, need 3 days for it to be done
8. Five (5) days later still limited i cant deposit or withdraw money
9. Call gaypal support again via phone number, burn my phone bill
10. Guy tells me to wait for 3 days and he'll resolve it
PHASE 3
11. One (1) day later (and not 3), i wake up from a yellow account to a red account where my account is now permanently limited WITHOUT ANY FUCKING REASON WHY
12. They blocked my card and forever blocked my name from using gaypal
13. I contact them on twitter to tell me what their fucking problem is and they tell me this:
"Hi there, thank you for being so patient while your conversation was being escalated to me. I understand from your messages that your PayPal account has been permanently limited, I appreciate this can be concerning. Sometimes PayPal makes the decision to end a relationship with a customer if we believe there has been a violation of our terms of service or if a customer's business or business practices pose a high risk to PayPal or the PayPal community. This type of decision isn’t something we do lightly, and I can assure you that we fully review all factors of an account before making this type of decision. While I appreciate that you don’t agree with the outcome, this is something that would have been fully reviewed and we would be unable to change it. If there are funds on your balance, they can be held for up to 180 days from when you received your most recent payment. This is to reduce the impact of any disputes or chargebacks being filed against you. After this point, you will then receive an email with more information on accessing your balance.
As you can appreciate, I would not be able to share the exact reason why the account was permanently limited as I cannot provide any account-specific information on Twitter for security reasons. Also, we may not be able to share additional information with you as our reviews are based on confidential criteria, and we have no obligation to disclose the details of our risk management or security procedures or our confidential information to you. As you can no longer use our services, I recommend researching payment processors you can use going forward. I aplogise for any inconvenience caused."
PHASE 4
14. I see they basically replied in context of "fuck you and suck my fucking dick". So I reply aggressively:
"That seems like you're a fraudulent company robbing people. The fact that you can't tell me what exactly have i broken for your terms of service, means you're hiding something, because i haven't broken anything. I have NOT violated your terms of service. Prove to me that i have. Your words and confidentially means nothing. CALL MY NUMBER and talk to me privately and explain to me what the problem is. Go 1 on 1 with the account owner and lets talk
You have no right to block my financial statements for 180 days WITHOUT A REASON. I am NOT going to wait 6 months to get my money out
Had i done something wrong or violated your terms of service, I would admit it and not bother trying to get my account back. But knowing i did nothing wrong AND STILL GOT BLOCKED, i will not back down without getting my money out or a reason what the problem is.
Do you understand?"
15. They reply:
"I regret that we're unable to provide you with the answer you're looking for with this. As no additional information can be provided on this topic, any additional questions pertaining to this issue would yield no further responses. Thank you for your time, and I wish you the best of luck in utilizing another payment processor."
16. ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME? I AM BLOCKED FOR NO FUCKING REASON, THEY TOOK MY MONEY AND DONT GIVE A FUCK TO ANSWER WHY THEY DID THAT?
HOW CAN I FILE A LAWSUIT AGAINST THIS FRAUDULENT CORPORATION?12 -
Why do people who cannot write specs still write specs? There are guys who just cannot produce anything human readable.
- Don't list 50 things in the same sentence separated with semicolon. Don't you have list bullets in your Word?? Or table, anyone??
- Now that you managed to add a table, don't write a novel into the cells. Especially now that you have decided to use 30pt font size and 3cm wide columns.
- If it's not an equation, don't use parenthesis. Why? Since they (and this is just my opinion (someone else might think otherwise)) are a little bit (or a lot, depending on the reader(s)) annoying (or otherwise irritating) since they (the parenthesis) tend to make the text (of any kind) very difficult (hard) to read especially (there can be other reasons) when you (or someone else in the company) have decided to write reaaaally long and complex sentences which add no information but make the reader go back and forth of the text trying (and sometimes not succeeding) to make any sense out of it.
- Always remember to use cross-reference number like [1] but don't tell what it is referring to. Special bonus will be awarded, if the link is broken!
- Save space and time by not explaining things that you can just refer to. Just add vague "read from [1], [2] and [3] for info about this." And then expect the reader to go through thousands of pages of boring jargon.
And oh yeah, please ask comments in the review session and then ignore all of them, since "well technically all the information was in the spec". You just need to be Sherloc Holmes to connect the dots.2 -
So, by a cruel twist of fate I ended up on the front line of tech support for the app we've built. It's aimed at non-IT professionals, in general people who are not expected to know too much about computers but who should have at least two neurons to bash together in their pretty little heads.
No.
It really makes me drop my faith in humanity considerably. Clicking a confirmation link is too much. Filtering an excel sheet is too hard, despite it being their technically main work tool. Tickets are basically "shit's broken go fix". What is broken? How to reproduce it? Why do you expect the person on the other side of the screen to be a fucking diviner? I recently ran all out of dove guts to search for the answers of your questions.4 -
!rant
Who do I have to murder or pleasure to get this at home not only in my cloud system
Gif is broken so here is a link http://i.haazen.xyz/U5YrvCqF.gif6 -
So just babbling my shit down here.
(Tldr : i am a crazy guy who followed my half slept brain, went onto a stage , gave some kind of motivating , stammering talk to a large group of professional strangers, enjoyed that day with a red embarrassed face and just got my first pic of me speaking on stage and that is so awesome !)
Last Saturday i went to a gdg meetup and i embarrassed the hell out of me.
I went there with just 2 hours of sleep from the previous night.
After a few talks there comes a guy who is taking some time to install is setup and the host calls for lightning round session ( ie he asks if anyone from the audience would like to share something about their product or something).
I am a fucking nutt guy. I can explain something to you nicely in a hacky way as long as i have done enough work on that and you speak my native language.
But giving a talk on English stage, hell no! I stammer, mix hindi with English and start speaking werd shit.. And that's what happened.
I don't know what went into me but as some guy went to the stage and talked for 2 mins, i was like yeah i want to do that too. So in next turn when he asked for a show of hands, i raised mine and fucking went to stage!
I forgot that if you go on stage you should have something to talk to . But the moment i was on stage, i was like... "Nope, we will do this differently".
I had been working on a video ads module from the last week which could be easily explained in 2 mins. But i felt like giving a non techy talk instead.
It went something like this: i introduced myself with my experience details ( who gives experience details on stage !?!) Then host said to speak loudly and i went like "Bharat mata ki jai!"( Victory to mother india (wtf!?😆) .
Then started talking about how the developers feel disheartened when searching on internet where the resources are scattered . And the solution i told them was :"don't be disheartened. You will eventually find it (like wow dude wtf, as if they didn't knew that) . Look on the youtube and other resources " and then went full on explaining/marketing about some online tutor who gives advice/consultancy via a subscription based payment ( tbf that guy really helped solve a lot of my doubts, he has written books on Android dev and is the top so answerer for Android).
Then i went on sharing my thoughts live on that fuckin stage ! ( Live because i usually post my thoughts here on devrant before discussing them out with real people, you guys are my safe space) but there i discussed my thoughts on libraries!
I have this believe that Android devs these days are having lesser knowledge of the system because we have all the libraries and templates available to us. But when we have to customize stuff, we need to go deep into docs and source classes and find ourselves in trouble there. So i kind of said this out loud and that we should try to read more the code and implement stuff ourselves instead of using the library 😅🙈)
I was feeling so fucking embarrassing after that all stuff! It was so full of stammering , broken English and worst attempt at motivation. At that time i was regretting this and about to burst cry and run away, but somehow i gathered my self, got my mood back to the event games and talks, later went to the organizers and apologized(and they were very nice and didn't cared about it), and overall enjoyed my weirdest day!
When i came home, my mom gave me a little more confidence about it. Now i think i shouldn't be that much instinctive. Next day i went hack to work and everything got normal.
But Yesterday i found a link to the public repository of the photos. Ohh fuck, someone had took my image! and that was too in full hd!!! 🙈🙈🙈😅😆😆 Oh mann I can't stop looking at that cool stage speaker image, i love it ! I, the shy-est and the most uncool awkward person , present on the stage with a mike, oof , i think i lived my dream !
I hope i could get enough confidence and speaking skills to take a real stage talk next time ( and maybe enough interesting talks and confidence to talk with girls of our office, ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ )5 -
Fuck Wordpress, Fuck Wordpress's PHP
I'm so fucking tired of everything in this godforsaken CMS. Import a JS File? Sure, just add a *completely obvious* line into a very specific PHP File, where you'll have to specify a lot of "useful" parameters. No, I somehow DON'T want to specify that I don't wand jQuery in every import. And don't even get me started on Content Delivering. Embed CSS? Sure, just write the fucking whole path to the file, or use the broken get_stylesheet_uri() Function. Embed an Image? Sure, let me just go to the Backend and wait 6 Minutes for this bullshitty System to upload the image and then copy the hard-coded Link. Oh, you want to remove googleapi embeds? Sure, let me just fuck up your whole Website in return.
You want jQuery? Well instead of using the "$" Symbol, you have to use the jQuery() Function. Except when you don't have to, which is 100% random each time you reload the page. Oh, you actually did import a JS File? Sure, let me just not run it. Thank you fucking piece of shit thats calling itself "WordPress" and fuck you and everyone whos actively encouraging its usage1 -
Took a web accessibility course somewhat recently. Here’s the list of typical accessibility problems according to those who use assistive technologies, from the most common to the least common:
1. CAPTCHA
2. Buttons and links that don’t work
3. Lacking/incorrect alt attribute
4. No input labels
5. Sudden layout shifts/content changes
6. Lacking/wrong headings
7. No keyboard access
8. Too many links
9. No skip link in header (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/...)
10. Lacking/broken search
11. Complicated and/or long forms
12. No closed captions for videos
13. Bad grammar
14. Bad contrast
15. Custom checkboxes
16. Custom dropdowns
17. Font size
I never knew CAPTCHA was THE worst offender. I also never knew that font size was perhaps the least problematic aspect.11 -
TLDR; macOS wouldn’t update to the version I needed because I have a 3rd party SSD. All I needed was a firmware update only found deep within a google search and a secondary SO answer.
I have a video edit project this weekend. No big deal.
Except that the Final Cut Pro project was saved in the latest version of FCPX, for which I need latest MacOS version
As a music producer on the side, I had heard the new file system of MacOS High Sierra would possibly break audio plugins. I didn’t bother updating until now. Looked further into plugin problem, it would be simply a broken hard link which I can easily fix. No big deal.
Except that I have upgraded my MBP SSD from 256gb to this 3rd party 480gb SSD. macOS does not recognize this SSD as compatible with update. No big deal. Simple google search for a terminal command would do the trick.
Except that I found and tried several solutions, including wasting an entire hour updating the original ssd and booting from that to try to update it.
Nothing worked, but deep down in the google search, found in a secondary answer on SO, there was a link for a beta release of a firmware update for the SSD that took two minutes to install, and I was finally able to update.
That firmware update needs to be more prominent everywhere. Wasted well over 3-4 hours updating crap, swapping out SSDs, and googling when all I needed was a fucking firmware update.9 -
When a company reaches the point where ya need to do welfare checks and send out a link to a crisis helpline at Christmas, y'all gone fucked up so many times you're putting a band aid on a broken arm.7
-
Fuck, I want to report a bug to KDE, but the more I think of it the more it looks like it's someone who implemented the shit.
It's a feature!
For some fucking reason KDE launcher overrides the commands from one of my programs with its shortcut entries. That's mostly OK.
Now, the problem is that if for some reason the shortcut goes broken, KDE makea sure it is stores in some sort of database, so that even if you delete it from the disk you will still have a broken link overriding the real command.
Until here it's OK. The thing is that, if you delete the shortcut , you will be prompted with a message showing its contents, asking if is it secure to launch the corresponding shortcut?
I'm like, what? Man I deleted the file, there's no shortcut anymore, just let it go and show me the original command.
why would I want you to store previously deleted shortcuts so you may make sure I launch my programs through them?
PS: forgot to tell the whole problem started from a bug in another program, which for some nonsensical reason creates shortcuts calling system commands through itself rather than just calling them out. The result is that once this program is removed all the shortcuts it created no longer work. -
The fuck is this shit?
The upper link is the actual link to the exherbo-project, a new source-based linux-distro.
The lower link forwards to a broken site, largely copying text from the original, while adding certain paragraphs about easy encryption and data-wiping to hide incriminating material.
Did someone from Gentoo went mad, because someone's developing an actual alternative to their shitty distro and package manager or what is happening here?5 -
(Repost: Broken Link)
Announcing Covey (v0.1)!
A lightweight (or at least that's the goal) Linux cluster orchestration/management system.
https://github.com/chabad360/covey
Why?
Because there are no systems with a (web) GUI (that I could find) that can run on a Raspberry Pi or similar.
This doesn't have a GUI!
It's coming in the next week or so (hopefully).
The codebase is shit!
I know, I'm actively refactoring it (feel free to send a PR).
What is it written in?
Go, with Postgres as the database.
Can I use it?
Go ahead and try, it's currently more in the MVP stage then at the stage where I recommend you use it.
Do you know what you're doing?
Maybe... This is my first big project in Go, and the first time I've ever used SQL. So I'm learning as I go along.9 -
Fuck you, magento and yes, fuck you, customer as well.
After 2 days of fixing crucial things like missing discount functionalities, taxes being displayed as 'tax' because some monkey hardcoded the term in the template instead of getting the tax class name and overall fumbling in magento's core just to make this broken shit do its job, the customer emails me, asking if we're making 'progress at all because the test link looks pretty unfinished'
Burn in hell, you two!12 -
I. Hate. Windows. Apps. UGH.
I may never be able to play FS2020 from the Xbox Game Pass again as... Its unable to install, gives a helpful 0x1 error code, and the help page link goes to a 404.
Now, I caused this myself... Partially... Er, no, fully, but I had a good reason!
I wanted to install something larger again and didn't have enough disk space. Fired up WinDirStat and there was a huge, like... 45 GB file in C:\Program Files\WindowsApps\Somedir\
Googling around, I found some people saying its a temp file so that Windows Store could reserve enough space for the app instalation... Okay, so... It got stuck, and I had no way to remove it?
Of course I didn't want to remove all apps of the windows market... So, I did something any *sane* person would never do - Took ownership of the whole WindowsApps and gave myself full control. Then I removed the file and... FS2020 never launched again.
I couldn't even uninstall it! It would give me no error either. It just lagged and then did nothing.
I tried resetting all the ACLs, tried giving ownership back to TrustedInstaller, nothing worked. Failed on some of the files, wtf?
Launching the game only ever told me there was an update in progress.
Tried booting a windows iso image and fix the ACLs from there, nope, also failed for the same bunch of files of FS2020. (Permission Denied while on a live image? Wow)
Last resort, I booted up Linux and tried removing the offending folders from there, only to find out that... Huh. The NTFS module labelled the offending folders as... broken links leading to an "unsupported reparse point". But hey, it let me remove it at least.
Since then, it no longer appeared as installed, but... Now, anytime I want to install it, it just throws an error 0x00000001 with no further details.
So yeah, I know I caused this myself, but after fiddling with the permissions and ACLs and NTFS dark magic, I feel justified in saying - Fuck you WindowsApps DRM.8 -
What the actual fuck is MSDN doing? I'm struggling for a whole goddamn month to make a WCF service used for only authenticating users. MSDN has around 4 different tutorials on this, from which one has a project to download, but the fucking link is not working, another one lacks basic information about the problem, and the rest of them are just a mess of links to solutions working when you are using a ASP web page. In the end, I'll probably find a single unmentioned issue, and it will work, but seriously, why the flaming fuck would you put solutions so broken, that even when copy pasting it it doesn't work at all?
-
My current task involves processing the commoncrawl web archive, and it's like a box of junk you buy at a flea market. You find so much useless stuff, broken stuff, stuff that makes you question people...
My latest find makes me wonder what lies out there if what I found was in plain sight. I found tens of thousands of websites that look like someone used markov chains to generate pron ads. Those websites exist in 10+ languages, use the same url-scheme, read like a dyslexic camgirl reading alphabet soup and are hosted on the same three ip-adresses. There is no javascript involved and some pages link to a variety of twitter accounts.
I queried a few commoncrawl files and amassed 4GB of this spam. Every time I look at it it gets weirder. There is an italian article about malware in there too.
Here's a text sample:
"Not from her bedroom, she her stream view and meet new experience. In hd india, because swimsuit still laws exist no interaction or frigthened and."1 -
Director walked in asking about the new homepage which we’re currently running an A/B test for. This page has been made and discussed by her direct colleague, the general director.
While walking though the page together with my colleage the designer the encounter a broken link.
Easy to fix ofcourse, and so we did, but shortly after he went back to hos room my colleage got an email asking who was responsible for this mistake.
It’s not one person. In first instance it’s our 6 headed web team. But after we deliver it multiple people test the page, and also the company who creates the A/B test sees tests and confirms.
This all happened during my holidays, but still i feel also responsible.
Couple of tiny mistakes, and still nobody in this whole process notices.
(At least 10 persons)
HOW THE HELL is that possible?!3 -
Devrant is so fucking broken. Sign out and go to devrant.com. No fucking way to login, Two fucking identical install buttons in the top right for your fucking crap iOS and Android apps, only way to fucking tell which is which is to hover over link.
I sign in by using a search engine to direct link to a random rant then I can login and post this, but now for some reason /feed and /stories fail to load too many redirects.
Even a worse eXperience than reddit.8 -
If I get one more escalation from the IT helpdesk about a login issue but it’s actually an broken link I am going to screem! Find the new link (it’s in multiple places) give it to them and then put the page location in the ticket you dumb fucks so I can update the URL.
This person called in 3 times over the weekend over this and no one thought to have give them the link.1 -
So as a personal project for work I decided to start data logging facility variables, it's something that we might need to pickup at some point in the future so decided to take the initiative since I'm the new guy.
I setup some basic current loop sensors are things like gas line pressures for bulk nitrogen and compressed air but decided to go with a more advanced system for logging the temperature and humidity in the labs. These sensors come with 'software' it's a web site you host internally. Cool so I just need to build a simple web server to run these PoE sensors. No big deal right, it's just an IIS service. Months after ordering Server 2019 though SSC I get 4 activation codes 2 MAK and 2 KMS. I won the lottery now i just have to download the server 2019 retail ISO and... Won't take the keys. Back to purchasing, "oh I can download that for you, what key is yours". Um... I dunno you sent me 4 Can I just get the link, "well you have to have a login". Ok what building are you in I'll drive over with a USB key (hoping there on the same campus), "the download keeps stopping, I'll contact the IT service in your building". a week later I get an install ISO and still no one knows that key is mine. Local IT service suggests it's probably a MAK key since I originally got a quote for a retail copy and we don't run a KMS server on the network I'm using for testing. We'll doesn't windows reject all 4 keys then proceed to register with a non-existent KMS server on the network I'm using for testing. Great so now this server that is supposed to connected to a private network for the sensors and use the second NIC for an internet connection has to be connected to the old network that I'm using for testing because that's where the KMS server seems to be. Ok no big deal the old network has internet except the powers that be want to migrate everything to the new more secure network but I still need to be connected to the KMS server because they sent me the wrong key. So I'm up to three network cards and some of my basic sensors are running on yet another network and I want to migrate the management software to this hardware to have all my data logging in one system. I had to label the Ethernet ports so I could hand over the hardware for certification and security scans.
So at this point I have my system running with a couple sensors setup with static IP's because I haven't had time to setup the DNS for the private network the sensors run on. Local IT goes to install McAfee and can't because it isn't compatible with anything after 1809 or later, I get a message back that " we only support up to 1709" I point out that it's server 2019, "Oh yeah, let me ask about that" a bunch of back and forth ensues and finally Local IT get's a version of McAfee that will install, runs security scan again i get a message back. " There are two high risk issues on your server", my blood pressure is getting high as well. The risks there looking at McAfee versions are out of date and windows Defender is disabled (because of McAfee).
There's a low risk issue as well, something relating to the DNS service I didn't fully setup. I tell local IT just disable it for now, then think we'll heck I'll remote in and do it. Nope can't remote into my server, oh they renamed it well that's lot going to stay that way but whatever oh here's the IP they assigned it, nope cant remote in no privileges. Ok so I run up three flights of stairs to local IT before they leave for the day log into my server yup RDP is enabled, odd but whatever let's delete the DNS role for now, nope you don't have admin privileges. Now I'm really getting displeased, I can;t have admin privileges on the network you want me to use to support the service on a system you can't support and I'm supposed to believe you can migrate the life safety systems you want us to move. I'm using my system to prove that the 2FA system works, at this rate I'm going to have 2FA access to a completely worthless broken system in a few years. good thing I rebuilt the whole server in a VM I'm planning to deploy before I get the official one back. I'm skipping a lot of the ridiculous back and forth conversations because the more I think about it the more irritated I get.1 -
Goddamn I've been fighting with unRAID lately, all to find out I've probably got a broken SSD. And to top it all off I've fucked up the other one so I had to reformat it. Sometimes when shit goes south, IT REALLY FUCKING GOES SOUTH. Fml.
Link to forum post for more details: https://forums.lime-technology.com/...
Damn it feels nice to have a place to rant.1