I FOUND JAVA RECRUITERS ON MOTHERFUCKING TINDER LMAOOOO

I met a skater who had a fork bomb on his skateboard

STOP WHAT YOU'RE DOING AND LOOK HOW BEAUTIFUL TOR BROWSER HAS BECOME

Fun but cringy

Client: I am unable to turn on my computer after running you app. Can you plz help me out.

Myself: Sure, since my app is corporate web app and nothing to do with OS lvl functions but still I will help you. (Didn't really had a choice🙄) Tell me your exact scenario.

Client: I think I was downloading some torrent as well, and then I am unable to turn on my computer.

Myself: Ok, try restarting your computer. Press power button 1-2 times.

Client: Nothing's happening.

Myself: Plug in your charger and try again.

Client: ohh! It started.

Myself: DUCK FACE😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑
( Disconnect the call immediately) And start writing code for people who doesn't even fucking know how to start the computer.

⏺ Procrastinating - SoundCloud on shuffle mode.
⏺Concentration lvl - NOOB or repeated work - Something that a mindless zombie could do. I play OneRepublic, Maroon 5, Coldplay, GreenDay, etc.
⏺ Concentration lvl - Serious - AudioMachine, Two Steps from Hell, etc
⏺ Concentration lvl God mode - I require absolute zero silence. You make as much a *sigh* anywhere within 4m radius of me, or I realise of your existence, you would wish you weren't born.

Waisting some times on codewars.com

~~~~
3 kyu challenge:

Given a string with mathematical operations like this: ‘3+5*7*(10-45)’, compute the result
~~~~~

*Does a quick and easy one liner in python using eval()*

*sees people actually writing some 100 lines parsing the string and calculating using priority of operation*

Poor them...

(Btw, passed to lvl 4 kyu thx to this)

I have a friend that is a girl that loves to snapchat everything she does, the problem is that she now works (in apprenticeship) at a huge company and she snapchats her desktop who has a lots of post-it notes and her screen which is showing excel spreadsheets with customers data and stuff...
And she does this on a regular basis btw
Who can be possibly that dumb...

!rant

I've been doing wrong these last year, so I decided to step up my game, implementing on my work cycle:

+ Testing
+ CI

It feels fucking great. If you're not doing it, it's time.

This is where the magic happens 😉

I had to migrate ~100+ svn repos to git that were "useful" according to the client but found out that there were a lot of projects (+6yrs old) with only one commit message "--no-commit-message" and i'm not even joking...
And then I had to explain to these "devs" how to use fucking git with eclipse (+they all use light theme...) cos' terminal or gui client is too complicated

And then I saw their "Java libs" with ~3k line of spaghetti

Do you even dev bro?

Before I die, I'll make a bot that'll tweet stuff I could say

First off murphy is a bitch. Week started off good, nothing bad happening then friday night came and i get an email about a site being down. Ok check it out real quick, cert is expired. No real big deal just a 20 minute fix, didn't bother me that i didn't get an expiry alert. Now is where murphy decided to be the biggest fucking bucktoothed cocksucker, generate a csr for a wildcard domain using an existing key and sent it off when i get it back the private key doesn't match the cert. Again ok maybe i fucked up, generate a selfsigned cert no fucking problem. Contact support to see if they have an idea. Oh now is when it gets fun, the fucking dumbass preceded to tell me how i didn't know what i was doing and how i just had to generate a csr and private key at the same time after i explained to the bastard that I've already tested it with a selfsigned cert. (How does this fucker have a job) By now apparently i was pissed off enough to scare murphy's pansy ass away cause i told the fucker to refund my money, got a list of 30 subdomains and setup letsencrypt on it. Now the part on this that is fucking hilarious is that it took me damn near 24 hours to be called a fucking idiot from a guy that doesn't know his ass between a hole in the fucking ground and 30 minutes of being pissed off more than i have been since i took anger management classes in the 9th grade to say fuck it and switch.

First day of holiday - manager messages that about small issues, ignored that.
Second day of holiday - received a message that everything is going wrong. Apparently I can't take any holidays as the world will burn in the meantime...

When i first got introduced to programming in highschool, java was the only thing offered. years later i picked up java again to throw together my first project. a 100 lvl java android phone game on my own. needless to say lol it was my utter failure! i remember my phone acting like it was on heroin constantly after install lol fuck that game

Well I wish I could abandon jQuery and bootstrap all together and just use some vuejs admin template with my Laravel app. But things are not that easy and I am a lvl 1.0 vuejs user.

So sorry V girl, you gotta learn how to live with Mr.J for a few more months.

I invested in a brand new 27" curved monitor to work more efficiently with my laptop but now
HDMI isn't recognized by my linux distro on dual boot where it works perfectly with fucking windows and it used to work nice before the latest update
Tried to install official nvidia drivers to try to fix that
🙃 Guess who has a fucked up X configuration now 🙋🏾‍♂️

I always recite borg quotes in my head when my classes need to inherit properties. Your technological and biological distinctiveness with be added to our own. Resistant is futile.

Autohotkey.

Is it just me or is AHK a bit braindead?

1. Why invent a worse version of other scripting languages instead of just writing a library..

2. Despite it's high lvl complex syntax it can't even manage multiline things without having 'or' 'and' '||' ',' '.' in front of every line?

Look what I had to do..

options := { image : "../../Resources/OpacitySlider.png"
, from : [ 0 , 0 ]
, to : [ a_screenWidth , a_screenHeight ] }
( commas were aligned with the curly bracket )

3. #Include isn't relative to the current file but relative to the main script?!

What the actual fuck.

Worked around it with:
#Include %A_LineFile%\..\Gdip.ahk
but wtf

( Including library files from other library files )

4. probably more, I just got the thing I was working on to work so I'd rather never touch it again if I can..

5. Profit?

Graphic & Web Designer
(job offer)

- graphical proposals for:
-web pages,
- banners,
- presentation materials,
- gaming graphic,
- application (iOS, Android) graphic...
Bla bla bla...

Min. 2 years profesional experience...
Valid certification and lvl of proficiency in (Adobe Photoshop, I lnDesign, Illustrator)...

Fast delivery....

Salary 3,50€ brutto / hr 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣....

Jobs in Slovakia 🤣

Finally managed to get gitlab ci working !

!dev

Sorry if this is a bad read, pretty new to devRant and writing in general.

I can't help but think and think of how much I fucked up my opportunities to completely change my life/financial status a couple of times. Damn.

A few years back (it was 2009, I think) I was playing Diablo II online, helped some random guy get through the hard levels. Normally, in such situation the lower lvl player allowed the higher level guy to grab the valuable boss loot; however this time the guy except sharing the loot with me asked me if I want his spare 2000 bitcoin. I asked if it's of any value, he said "not really".

I said I'd contact him later, when I figure out how this thing works and how to setup a wallet.

Guess what, I was too lazy and forgot about this thing completely. Then we lost contact.

In 2010, I made a comeback to bitcoin, but instead of buying it, I downloaded the bitcoin client, the blockchain (it was 800 mb in size, I remember) and have been contributing by running it on my PC for like a year.

Finally decided to get it ~3 years ago. Bought 2.5 BTC for 400$.

Was holding it, until I fell for the "free OmniseGO" scam and somebody stole them off me.

All of these can't get out of my head.
I visit coinmarketcap literally every hour to see how much I could have now. My girlfriend, friends, family, all fail to cheer me up. I still made a pretty good deal buying 5.5 ETH for 45$ and thats like 2500$ soon, its nice but this much I can make by coding

Shit, what do I do to stop being stressed except for seeing a psychologist.

May my failure make you smile today

Java sqlexception stacktrace lvl impossibru

I started working as back end dev and I was given a pc sadly with no admin rights (which I neede oc) so I happily requested them to IT services. After 3 weeks of waiting got a msg telling me that the script for giving me admin rights was not working so they had to send the request to the next lvl and bla bla bla.
So... I called them. A really nice guy just connected to my pc, used an admin resque account and added my user as admin (2 mins) et voilà. 1 month of waiting for a 2 mins shet. Hate big companies...

My top 3 open source projects are :
KDE ❤️❤️❤️❤️
Libinput gestures (allows you to do custom actions with your touchpad)
Strapi (Wich is a nodejs headless cms that gets the job done very quickly I haven't tested it in prod tho)

Let's see: Right now I am in two recruitment process of two enterprise.

One enterprise (Genexus, a big enterprise) I would join the I+D team, good salary, EXCELLENT work place, and 2hs of travel from home.

The other enterprise (InnovaAge, a little but powerful enterprise in grow) I would join as trainee / junior developer who helps in the development team and I would constantly learn to become like my teammates, same salary than Genexus, good work place, and 1.5he of travel from home.

Same working hours amount and same salary but InnovaAge have the GREAT advantage of be near from my University, Genexus is TOO far from there.

So, I ask you: if both enterprises would want to recruit me ... What offer should I accept?

I ask to you because you have more knowledge and exp. You are lvl 20-40 xD

Hey guys.
So, got tired of trying to learn on top of the knee (Portuguese expression) and decided to do some courses to get the basics.
Where do you recommend I go?
1. Course must be free
2. Not over 100 hours per course (I'll have 1 to 2 hours a day if I really focus on it)

What I need:
Language (lvl of knowledge)
- Python (know the basics) + kivy (basics)
- Html (good) + css (basics) + javascript (basics)
- node.js (0)
- Jquery ( 0 ) + Django (0)

I know there's lots of good courses out there and lots of dumb stupid ones, care to give your opinion? Thank you

cables. lots of cables. also, an ethernet switch.

But the toys I have (and other ppl keep burrowing) is a dalek, tardis minuatures - about 6cm Height (2.1"), and lvl 5/6 hanayama metal puzzles.

This is really annoying when you’ve good paid job with really good coworkers but you want to change it... I always wanted to be a programmer but when I started my work in IT trade I got job as administrator... several years have passed and now changing my job is a big deal (degradation of my salary to 1/2 of actually). I don’t know what should I do... my programming skills is not impressive...I know java a bit with spring boot , hibernate and some other things(totally junior lvl of these skills)... but I think it’s not enough...this is really hard situation :/

So I plan to ditch my 17" heavy gaming laptop to chose something more suitable for school for a (13/14") ultrabook (I plan to run Debian on it) that has a decent battery life
Anyway, I looked at those chinese ultrabook on AliExpress/gearbest but I'm a bit skeptical about some factors.
Anyone has recommendations about a model or some advices?

!rant, but story

Update: I now work as a 1st lvl support

After 5 to 11 months I'll work in deployment and after that in development.

<long post>

To start of I'm a student in the Netherlands, I have just finished finished a support management study and I'm currently starting with a IT Management study on MBO 4 lvl.

At the moment I'm in conflict scout doing the IT Management study or doing a application development study as I just don't know what to do. I kind of want do development as I do it in my free time and I like it but I also want to do data center engineering as I also like to work with the hardware.

Should I take a month break of my study and try to get in contact with company's to work there to finalize my decision or should I just drop in the towel and do this study without knowing if I'm going to like it in the end.

And if you work at a company in the Netherlands do you think i can do some orientation internship at your company or do you guys know some places to look at.
</Long post>

What would you want to tell to your past you ?
Like, the advice that could have helped you a lot if you heard it at the right time

Today I learned how to read extract and parse a multi lvl XML file in Perl, only took 4 hours to make the script from 0 knowledge of Perl.

I'm... Confused? Undecided?
I like the place where I work because of the people... Even the worst are nice (tough sooner or later I'm gonna have words with the engineer... I had no problems so far but when he gets mad his a dick).
I'm being prazed a lot... One of my bosses say that I'm a find and every time I talk about looking for other jobs everyone tries to make me change my mind.

On the down side... They pay like shit. I should be getting double at entry...
Machines have no mantainance... One is even working without oil and that brakes my hearth.
I'm still a temp... One would think the owners would be doing everything to keep me, since I can get to a lvl that others take years and I keep finding mistakes that more experience workers don't see.
Well... I'll wait and see. They can't keep me as a temp for more than a year...

for christ sake.. I ended up receiving all problems at a startup, I am alone every lvl of support from software exceptions to plc. Even for machines I have never received any training or explanation. How can a company afford mass holydays and rely for all level support on a single person who is still under training? I cant dug deeper in any issue because then I got overfilled with questions. I really want this week to end...

How the fuck are lifts programmed? Two lifts in a shaft, one at level 0, the other at level 4, I call it from level -1. Which one comes? You bet your ass it's the one from lvl 4. Is it Math.random()?

Hey guys I have a NUC and a spare monitor are there "fancy screensavers" that I could modify if needed ? Or should I do one myself haha

Feel boring on Sat.
Open laptop and refactor a bit of code. Haha