Girl: "hey"

My Brain:
java.lang.NullPointerException:
at net.brain.functions.Talk.retrieveSpeech(Talk.java:2978)
at net.brain.functions.Talk.createFlirtyResponse(Talk.java:3132)

Me: null

*Girl walks away*

Heard a conversation between my colleague and the boss

Boss: (saw my colleague's messy desk) hey, could you organize your desk? It's not nice to see when clients come in. You know what they say, messy desk represents a messy brain..

Colleague: (glanced over to the boss' empty desk) and what does an empty desk say for the brain?

My Brain @ Day Time And Night Time

My brain hurts just from thinking that i need to write regex

I guess my brain needs more processing power, or better recovery times?

My brain hurts.

Gave a talk in front of 150 people today. For first 5 seconds my brain was like wtf, fml
Managed to not shit myself for next 30 mins
Fuck! Should stay introvert

Advice from my neighbour:
" Don't use laptop so much, you know eyes are really soft, virus can easily enter to your brain through your eyes. If you take my advice it's good for you."

-_-

Internship interview...
First question...
Them : Why are you here ?
Me :
My brain :
The girl beside the guy who asked me the question :

Stack Overflow is down, gotta use my brain now

!Rant

Doctors called me back, I’ve got brain decompression surgery in a month... fuck my life. If it’s not one fucking thing it’s another.

My brain, randomly delete stuffs. Lossing data at the rate of writing them.

I just hit the scales this morning. I need to lose 10 kg ASAP.

My brain loves programming but my body hates it.

Well, the OS that is my brain has an official uptime of 19 years... It's gotten pretty buggy, I'm not sure what the devs were thinking with half the features...

When my brain is on turbo boost mode to complete my coding projects and my parents are like "son stop playing with your laptop, do some productive work, think of your future". 🙂🔫

My brain at 5:00 AM

A while a go in class we were told to look at this article about poor to stupid security... and my brain melted

Can i just plug a usb with the information into my brain? Why do i have to download this incrementally? This takes too long!

Me: I've been using ubuntu with i3 for 6 months. Is awesome. Everything works great.
Brain: Have you seen debian or arch linux. They're better than ubuntu. Just try' em
Me: Brain shut up. I don't have time to reinstall everything + I'll 100% fuck my pc up. I'll do it another time.
Brain: Trust me. I know what's better for you. Try it now
Me: No.
Brain: Pleeeeease.
Me: Ok fine.
Me: Now windows doesn't work, debian doesn't work. I need to format my hard drive and do this shit all over again.
Brain: ¯\_(ツ)_/¯. Hey. Install arch linux.

I 💓 PHP.

It seems my brain is hacked.

How can I like PHP so much.

!rant

I often find myself reading a physical copy of a book or something written on paper and my brain just wants me to Ctrl+f

I wish I could download developer knowledge into my brain like Neo did in "The Matrix".

"I know React"

I fucked up my brain while learning brainfuck! 😣

Edit: And yeah, I still don't know how to use it...

**Evolution of Cursee's Search Queries**

Chronological orders from 2007 to 2018

- internet not working
- wifi not working
- wifi not working on ubuntu
- wifi not working on ubuntu XX.xx
- install wifi driver ubuntu XX.xx
- install Realtek rtl88xxxx on ubuntu Xx.xx

Another fucking rant about my fucking goldfish brain.

At meetings, I usually note down things I need to fix, to do on the sticky note pad that comes with the OS, currently Mint.

I sat at my desk.
Looked at my notes.
Decided to properly put them as tasks on trello.
I copied all notes, planning to paste it on a trello card quickly.
Then I can just work on trello and separate into different tasks.
Connection issue.
Ethernet said connected but websites are not showing up.
Maybe restart will fix since I haven't opened any app and started working anyway.
Reboot.
Internet works.
Yayyy.
Trello showed up.
Yayyy.
oooh
f
u
c
k.

fuck.
fuck.

It's way past midnight, I just want to sleep aaaaaand my brain is thinking of a very interesting application to write..

A pause function for my brain would be fucking amazeballs :/

My favorite method?

Step 1: Meet Morpheus
Step 2: Swallow red pill
Step 3: Wake up from the Matrix
Step 4: Upload needed Knowledge directly to my brain
Step 5: Go back to Matrix

Me: "I've got an exam tomorrow morning, I should try to go to sleep early tonight".

22:00 - Get into bed and put on audiobook
23:00 - "Alright I'm getting sleepy now, I should fall asleep soon :)"
00:00 - "Must be soon now"
01:00 - "Maybe in 15 minutes"
02:00 - "Still got 6 hours to sleep, plenty of time"
03:00 - "My body is tired, my mind is not"
04:00 - "RIP"

It's safe to say that my sleep rhythm is utterly fucked.

Bumped my head very badly
To check if my brain was alright, I revised recursive factorial program.

I FUCKING FORGOT MY LAPTOP IN MY DORM. I HAVE NO PC FOR THIS WEEKEND. I HAVE 2 PRESENTATIONS, THAT I HAVE YET TO COMPLETE, ON IT. FUCKING BRAIN. FUCKING DORM THAT CLOSES AT 2 P.M.

So I was procrastinating on my side project, then somehow started a new one but this time with three partners, now I procrastinate on this new project by working on my side project.

GREAT

So I got 10 days of national holidays now starting tomorrow, gonna learn some PowerBI and neural network for college paper material. Problem is my brain just not fuckin good enough to absorb all of this algorithm. Fuck brain

My fingers: typing
My face: nervous
My text: // this is a comment im to distracted
My teacher: staring at me
My brain: syrup sandwiches and syrup syrup sandwiches syrup sandwiches

me when I complain that Win10 update is so fucking slow and someone suggests that I do a puzzle to exercise my brain while I wait

Pretending to have a hard deadline if I don't have one. Gotta trick my brain in putting some effort into it.

I have a problem...

And my brain is desperate​

setup my new private project with react, to dive deeper into react.
brain: hey, how about to read a little bit about vue vs. react vs. angular?
me: ok?
me: *reading some articles about the topic*
brain: hey, how about to play around with vue a little bit?
me: ok.

and this is me right now:

What if, the whole world was programmed an run out of code?🌍🌎🌏
~ My brain in the morning

I wish I could type into my brain:"dd if=/dev/zero of=/dev/sda bs=512 count=1337"

To delete everything of my ex gf memories...

She just wrote a message, again...

Stop calling appetizers as 'Apps' would you already?

It confuses my hungry dev brain!

Does anyone else really dislike "foo", "bar" and "baz"? Because fuck me I do. My brain can't process that stuff, I need some actual real world context.

or, maybe i'm just dumb.

Google in my brain and Linux in my heart!

My brain works mostly at night but most jobs starts in the morning. Why?

right my brain, it's​ 2 AM and you're on your full energy. but I will regret that at the morning.

thank you for screwing me!

30 min figuring out what happen to my code. And realize that = is used in if statement instead of ==.

Thanks brain

It's official...my brain stops working @ 2:26 AM

I would like to take a moment to thank my brain.

I dreamed about the code I need to write to create something I was struggling with! Logically it all make sense!

Just needs to try it and see how it goes.

Thank you Brain!

Why do I feel like my brain needs more swap but the HD is full?

If you have "ijk" in your name, you're either Dutch or a matrix.

been a win user for all my career.
started a new job last monday,and had to switch to a mac.

damn, that shit fries my brain.
all the shortcuts, my brackets, everything is different.

Them: why do you like programming?
Me: because that euphoric moment and rush oxytocin to my brain, after finally solving my problem, makes it all worth the hard work and bashing my head into a wall for weeks.

My brain wanted to type 'async' and 'await' at the same time

I typed awync

1. Success in supporting my wife for her personal goals

2. Quality time with my family, especially with my daughter

3. Maintain my current brain abilities

This kind of random stuff happens to me often:

*comes home from going out*
*wants to sleep badly*
Brain: heyyy, why don't we take a look at some vps discounts!!!
Me: please, I want to FUCKING sleep.
Brain: oh come on...
Me: pls don't do this to me..
Brain: But vps discounts...
Me: oh FUCK YOU, I'll go look up some stuff.

My brain can be weird and annoying.

!Dev
I found this on Quora... it keeps me awake as I struggle to find the fourth person. Yes I can see 3 persons and four bottles.

Say hi to my new code/debug buddy.
It'll help me to solve complex issues with his big brain.

So, I spent some time learning c++ and now my brain is completely melted coming from js.

So i look at my phone checking how late it is...
I put my phone back into my pocket...

My brain is like "time = null;"

When I opened my textbook today it took my brain a second to figure out why it isn't in dark mode.

Drinking is all fun and games until you need to come in to work next morning." The fuck is a JavaScript" is what my brain is at the moment.

Dude picking his brain over my coke. Yes I mean attempting to tickle his brain trough the nose hole.
A piece of nasal excrement landed in my coke and made it go fizz, that was how I noticed.

Sometimes I cant trust my brain.

My mouth: "It's probably the cache"
My brain: "I have no fu***** clue what's wrong"

My feelings towards half the people in my class because most a brain-dead cunts with no aspirations or passion for anything they do.

My brain is now giving me solutions when the coding assessment is over
T-T

Java had sex with Javascript and produced scala.. And now its fucking my brain

My brain power allocation:
- 1% — happiness
- 1% — creativity
- 1% — work
- 97% — picking out insignificant details in my past and feeling anxious about them, imagining what could’ve been, or rigorously planning out completely hypothetical scenarios

Before learning the css grid, I fell asleep so fast everytime at night. After the bootcamp

This is the 3rd day and I still can’t sleep on time, my brain keeps on banging my eyes to wake up and try all of the websites that have been piled up on my brainbfor 3 years

P.S. I start learning grid after using bootstrap layout the first time. Not gonna touch it again. It breaks my brain kinda bad

Me: *Run the project and nothing works*
My brain: Do it again

*My friend texting me*

Friend: wtf

My brain: w tf
My brain again: tf
My brain again: import tensorflow as tf

😂😂am brain dead

Me: closes eyes and says to myself how I MUST get some sleep..
My brain: *starts thinking about keywords MUST, SHOULD, REQUIRED and how those are defined in RFC-2119*

Why I just can't get some normal sleep, could it be licensing issue with my brain? 🙈

Damn procrastination, I'm sure I would've finished a thousand projects already, I just hate my brain...

I felt the urge to fuckimg cry after losing my brain cels readign ths

Dear brain, could u please work?

"No you motherfugging arsehole, scratch the sand out of your vagina and make yourself your own processor. Fuck u."

Seems like it's the jolly season of "my brain is uncooperative and unwilling".

When I get myself a coffee in the morning, opening up my IDE, looking at the legacy code.. my brain starts yelling: "out of the way coffee, this is a job for whiskey"

Anybody else physically write notes when studying a new programming language? I do it because it really helps solidify the information in my brain and also makes for good reference.

Just got my first callback for a technical interview in JS tomorrow morning.
WOOOOO

*Brain*

"That's cool fam, but you just lost any ability to write anything in it."

...

Somehow my brain assumes that code is high performance code when its all written in lowercase... :D

Hi.
Programming language types are only two:
- Assembly
- All the rest

I'm destroyed, my brain is melted.
Assembly is hate and love at the same time.

My brain: don't get your hopes up don't get your hopes up don't get your hopes up..

Yoyo games: *clears throat*

Ah, the old locked up non-gui thread. Bastard gets me every time. My monkey brain says "Button still work, so no infinite loop". Oh, but there DO be infinite loop.

Functional programming is folding my brain.

Have been using python for a long time. Can't help roommate with a C project because my brain automatically filters out semicolons!!😢

I’m a developer, not a designer, y r u making me do wireframes and shit, it’s short-circuiting my brain

Why do most docs have grey text color over a white background! It's just incredibly difficult to focus on. And my brain is like a potato to begin with.

My (optimistic) brain at 11:30pm right before bed: "You should totally wake up extra early tomorrow to FINALLY finish that last 5% of your side project that has taken you 10x longer to do than the first 95%!"

My (sleepy) brain at 7:00am: *Hits snooze.* "Eh, there's always tomorrow!"

Just remembered that I forgot to push all day's work..
Now my scumbag brain is going to keep me awake all night thinking about all the shit that can go wrong...
Great

Anyone been through this?

Trying to learn how to program a programming language.

My brain.

Think my brain is drowning in my nasty thoughts.

I wasn't sure whether boobstrap or bootstrap for seconds.

Oh my god my brain is hard wired to write c++ in snake case. Spent 4 years doing it. This code base uses camel case.

Trying out i3 (gaps) now. Time to mess my brain up with all these keybindings from i3, vim, termite, tmux, uzbl...

Could have tried qutebrowser too but sadly it doesn't work in my raspberry pi.

What the hell! Every time someone comes over to my desk and stands behind me my brain disengages from my fingers an I start misspelling and doing wrong commands etc..

Just one more reason everyone should have private office.

It's 2:49AM

my fucking brain starts working in high performance mode right now and sleeps not exist anymore :/

I hope to never encounter Assembly again, my brain hurts

Ah, my brain, MY FUCKING BRAIN!

Got some work from the previous company. Need to update some stuff on their website.

Fine, got the files from the server via sFTP.

Made the changes, before uploading the files, wanted to create the latest backup.

Downloaded the files again, just to realize that I forgot to cd into a different directory before re-downloading the files. All the changes are now overwritten.

Half an hour of work lost. DAMN IT!

My damn brain all day today: 🎼I am a dwarf and I'm digging a hole. Diggy diggy hole🎶

Your brain is like muscle. Use it or lose it. Damn! My brain is obese!

Just noticed the notifications now display ++'d instead of +1'd, my brain can now rest easy knowing...

It took me way too long to understood what I wrote few weeks ago. After looking at the code for few minutes and looking at my db structure, I finally realized. I also instantly remembered that I wrote that "user is shown as ad" comment hoping I will not confuse myself in future. Apparently I failed.

Temporarily added next line of comment to help the future me.

Deep down I know that I should change function name itself to become clearer, more meaningful and easier to understand.

But writing that comment, making those screenshots, combining the 2 images in Pinta and writing this rant is faster than thinking the new name.

Todays story: conversation between me and my brain about a app that i have planned for a long while.

The application is just a huge, specyfic json editor/manager for a game that i like. The game uses json files to determine unit charactetistics. So in order to make modding easier i want to make a tool for that that is fancier and easier to use than a notepad.

Brain> Lets make a app that allows you to mod the game easier!
Me> Good idea. How would you want to make it?
Brain> Lets use C# cause you main that lang currently and you have experience with json parser lib.
Me> That is true. So what do you wanna implement first?
Brain> Oh. I have thought about it before! I want to implement: (10 000 features) and maybe few more later!
Me> It sounds like a infinity project, shouldnt you implement like 1 or 2 features at first and then jump to other ones?
Brain> Yes... but i dont wanna refactor those features latter so let just implement them all at once!
Me> Dammit brain! Let just implement just one feature now! Like a simple json editor. You can use inhieritance to reuse the code later.
Brain> Ok...
* Starts with that one feature but one day later starts coding 6 more *
* Cant publish the app yet, the code looks like shit, gui is unfinished because brain wanted only to test those 6 unfinished features without propely implementing them *
Me> Brain WTF! You said that you are going to focus on one feature at the time!
Brain> I got carried a bit...
Me> ...
Me> Ok. I understand. Let just refactor the code and clean the project out of those unfinished features.
Brain> No. I have a depression now...
Me> FUCK.

* 2 month passes by without any progress on ANY of my projects*

current day

Brain> I still have depression...
Me> Ok i dont care about that anymore! Tell me something that i dont know!
Brain> Oh I have good news as well!
Me> ???
Brain> What about the home server that is going to store all mods made by the users so they can share it? It would be a good practice with networking!
Me> * Gives up *

I almost always program in Ruby but every single time I switch over to JavaScript, I cannot stop adding semicolons to my Ruby code for hours. Brain, y u no readjust!?

My brain goes into infinite loop when an Interviewer asks, what was the hardest thing you did at your job?

Just took me a while to set up my first pi for headless use. Why? Because I'm small brain and added commas in the conf file like it was a JSON object.

Wasted all morning trying to work on my defense. Brain is not responding. Then sat for some data exploration cuz I got tired of wasting time and brain is like "woah! I love this! Let's do this!". 😐

My defense is gonna be a shitshow. FML. ☠️

i'm supposed to use some lorem ipsum when making flutter work to explore most of it's features but of course my meme brain turns on and makes this monstrosity instead

Assembly language broke my brain today

My brain used to be normal and I used to think callback is bizarre.

Now I understand callback and my brain has become bizarre.

My brain says " let's do something exciting today"

My body says " don't listen to that fool"

Burnout hit me. I cant fucking function. I feel extreme tiredness. My brain cant think or work. In fact im feeling numbness in my brain! How can my brain become numb? Thats ridiculous! This has to be a mild burnout or some bullshit. Way too much excessive work and mental pressure. I need a break and this is gonna cost me at least 1 but full day of rest it seems

My brain feels just like this:

⚡️🤡⚡️🤡⚡️
🤡⚔️⚡️⚒️🤡
⚡️⚡️🧠⚡️⚡️
🤡🛠⚡️🔩🤡
⚡️🤡⚡️🤡⚡️

I have a new job in Spain. I'm from France.
France use AZERTY keyboards, Spain use QWERTY.
I feel like my brain is melting (+_+)

I like these rants beginning with "fuck!!!"

It makes me feel unbelievable good!
It literrallycleans up my brain!!!!!!
Fuck!

I laughed harder than I should

Regex hurts my brain.
I'm trying to learn it currently, does anyone have any tips?

Streem all those analytics to my brain.

me: I want to look into using an MVC for my websites...
brain: Nope, not gonna happen, we're gonna stick to the simple inclusion of site pieces directly in the front-end code instead.
me: but but but
brain: I SAID NO!

I hate my brain.

When I want to program it's always when I'm outside doing chores, on a trip or when I'm at my non-dev job.

When I finally get home and ready for working on projects my brain feels like watching Schwarzenegger films instead.

Fuck you brain.

Scala is doing my brain in. That's all. 🤷🤯😵

PO: Is it done yet?
PO: Whats the status?
PO: Any progress??

My brain: Did we have requirements for this, or just a deadline

*Opens IDE*

My brain: oh right! This is that thing that you do to try and convince yourself that coding something will make you feel good about yourself, one day buddy, one day...

Also me: welll... Thanks for the confidence brain *said as I pound down the sixth beer*

My
Brain
Has
Too
Many
Tabs
Open

I'm writing code then used Imperial class instead of Impression class. My brain is on star wars mode.

Feck. My brain bluescreened during a coding interview and I had a major panic attack. No clue what or why it happened. FML.

I need to build multithreading in my brain, i want to learn at least 8 new code languages and techniques at the same time(not to mention normal languages)

My brain.
Couldn't have been a dev without that.

My brain: Testing is a good practice

Me testing my project:

Learning these design patterns literally feels like I'm bending my brain into positions it never thought it could fold...
Shit fuckin hurts. I feel enlightened at the same time though 😟🙌

breakthrough moment

just realized, when reading english books; my brain makes a conversion to my native langauge.

and instead doing conversion, if I articulate the information in the english language itself, I seem to understand better.

My anxiety is over the roof. I have keep 3 media players simultaneously playing Pink noise, Sounds of raindrops and lofi hiphop just to keep my brain grounded.

My god i hate so much reactjs... And will never understand how a normal brain could write such a russian doll code.
But then, i met flutter, god i will puke.

Was interested to code more but had to force myself to bed because I wanted to give some rest to my brain.

Me, converting shit to JSON between a data pull and an API call even though I don't have to just because the data only makes sense to my brain that way.

!rant

Wrote an literal assload of stored procedures for my DB.
Got introduced to Enitity Framework.
My brain just exploded with rainbows and possibilities :D

Not to mention it feels so much cleaner :v

This day sucks, i cant even code or learn on any tutorial ,my brain just wants to know who will sit on the iron throne.

Some times i do things and for a split second my brain goes "why dont u hit ctrl z that'll fix it"

I'd love to start a pet project, but my brain refuses to come up with an idea. 😑
At least I'm used to it, seems like my creativity is not existent.

My body is begging me to sleep, but there is so much caffeine in my blood that brain is not letting me to do so....

Why does my brain just struggle so much with Rust.

So much of the design fundamentals I've learnt over the last 10 years from doing OO in memory managed languages don't carry over very well into Rust, and my brain is sucking at coming up with alternatives, or finds the alternatives I do make ugly.

Frustration is real.

Whenever I do something good in real life I hear my brain automatically say ‘cmd + s’

Sometimes I feel like my brain has a really fast CPU. But the RAM frequency really bottlenecks the whole system.
Any suggestions to upgrade the RAM?

Me: I wrote this block of code right?
My brain: lol yes!
Me: Then what does it do?
My brain:

Just learned how to write a for loop in kotlin and I now want to burn Java to the ground. When I first learned for loops in Java my brain almost imploded.

I wish I had stack callback for my brain. I would love to know how I came to be thinking about sword fighting with stale baguettes at 8 in the morning.

I hate my brain.
Got a compliment, my brain automatically rejected it and judged it.
Then it started to judge the judgement. Then the judge^3.
Then go all the way to the recursion.

For the last few days my brain is making me lose focus on everything because of this.
And the most fucked up thing is, I am paranoid of my own brain, so I really judged my memories and shit. I think I am losing my mind, my uni doesn't have consulting for students either nor I have money.

Any advices from ppl who went to a psychologists will be appreciated. A lot.

Sometimes I've looked back at some code I've recently written and thought, this makes no since... Instead of rewriting it, I just leave it confident in my brain at the time...

Nah I'll quickly fix my arch installation, can't take that long...
- my brain at 12pm (about half an hour ago)

Plottwist: I didn't fuck up the whole system and it's booting again.
I didn't expect that myself

Update from the hackathon:

We decided to create a co-op game where you there is an agent on the field who has to reach an objective, while the operator guides him toward the exit on each level and opens/closes the remotely controlled doors for the agent. We want to add enemies that somehow will try to kill the agent, but we'll see what we manage to do. 🙄

Now I'm currently trying to sleep, but: Went to sleep at 2:15 and I have barely slept 2 fucking hours. Now it's 6:56. Still trying to sleep, but my brain is a cunt. 😲

Joined a algorithm chat group recently, now I am questioning my dumb brain

I wish I could design actually good looking websites. It's not about css, my problem is that I just can't imagine what I would want it to look like. My brain do be very not creative.

Me: ok so let's be producing tonight, work on some new systems and maybe some of my book..

Brain: *no you won't, you'll get drunk, get annoyed and shelf another project like the millions you have and will forget about your book...*

Me: ...

Brain: *exactly what I thought, now sit down and be a good little Dev*

Even my own brain hates me haha

WFH and I got up to get a mouse for my laptop. Five minutes later, I sit back down with a plate of fish. Dammit, brain, wrong animal.

Went in for an interview today and left my brain at home. Never been so tongue tied. And as it were I was the only remaining candidate. FML!

> uses two workstations
> Forgets to commit code on one before moving to the other
> Works on the other and pushes
> Brain does what it's great at and forgets how to reset to HEAD
> Brain convinces me the only way to handle the issue was to commit my half-working code and then pull
It was only 5 o'clock. What the fuck.

Every time I read the abbreviation for Cold Fusion Markup Language, my brain translates it to this:

CFML -> C?! F*ck my life!!

my hand is becoming a bottleneck.

it used to be slow device. upgraded.
it used to be mouse & IDE. upgraded to nvim.

now. my wrist gets sore.
waiting for Elons brain computer interface.

So, today I've read a study that says that chocolate '' improves brain function ". Bullshit. What improves brain function is having a glass of scotch while programming. Damn, I even write code faster. The problem is the morning after when I re-read my programm. I really didn't thought I knew mandarin.

I haven’t seen sun ☀️ for like 3 days. My brain became slow or something cuz I can think about how I am getting my ideas 😂😂

I still don't get why Chrome won't respect the password *autocomplete="off"* attribute. For fucks sake it's my goddamn website u shit brain! Obey the fucking command!!!

My biggest influencer? My Web Dev schools psychologist. Always scheduling breaks in our day.
He continuously reminded us it's a positive thing to walk away from the code and change up the brain patterns.

My friends are getting married and having kids and I'm having pitiful arguments over the most pathetic and useless discussions ever in my code reviews in a brain eating job with no end in sight.

Oops! I did it again. Shredded the brain trying to debug my code. Now, my head is empty with a totally unrelated issue I need an answer to. What happens when one travels faster than light? Uuuurgh!

My head is hurting and my brain feels cloudy after that nap... but should I get back to it? That is the question.

Edit: Just found that my ears are wet inside. This is an interesting but gross development.

I have been in front of this bloody screen for 13 hours now. I'm also ill. And my washing machine broke today and couldn't be fixed. My brain right now:

Connect my brain and communicate to any computer telepathically.
Not humans, I don't want human brains.
But computers. Sweet little bad-ass machines.

I'm reading a paper book right now, and it's eerie. My brain is desperately looking for pixels but finds none. I feel dizzy.

!dev

It's great that people finally start to boycott big tech social media, but I really don't want your brain deprived thought vomit on my mastodon feed.

Guess I'll look into hosting my own instance soonish

The weather is so hot that I can use it as an excuse for the slowness of my brain melted software

Cool these chips better, not my fault

What is semaphore.... My brain refuses to understand.

Become a node on the Internet. IOM - Internet of Me.

1) Write complete systems in my head. Store them in my brain and upload when complete.

2) Provide users access to my brain systems and memories.

If I find a brain implant to do this I will send you the IP.

I'm on leave but my brain won't stop thinking about ways to refactor that one js module I was working on yesterday into a functional one.

The fuck, brain?? I'm doing you a favor here by letting you take a day off!

2AM is the best time to play some Sudoku... My brain must really want to goto sleep now...

Me : Thinking about my social life.
My brain : Error 404

My brain uptime nearly 24 hours today

Thinking about an amazing app.
Me: "I will start doing it tomorrow"
Brain: "yeah cool... LET'S DO IT!!"
tomorrow arrives.
Me : "I will this other app...it's fantastic!"
Brain:" oh my god...I can't wait!!!!"
a month passes.
Brain: "weren't you supposed to do your 46 side project apps??"
Me: "I remembered I already work 12 h/day......"

When I'm in the zone, someone comes to talk to me and my brain forgets how to make words into a sentence.

Cursee's Bizarre Nightmare Series

Dream 3

I was a gay in the dream.

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What in the fuck is happening in my brain?

The nerves in my brain are connected with redstone repeaters set to the highest delay!

Two steps from UAT being done:

Product owner: "Oh yeah, one more thing."

My brain: "You gotta be shitting me!"

My brain, hands, fingers, laptop and VS Code need I explain?

Learning how to hack my brain!

Time for me to have an upgrade too!

!dev

Anxiety in my brain is like Mozart's Lacrimosa is playing out of key and proper arrangement.

So. Fucking. Annoying.

May the code of this universe flow through my brain *wakesup* good morning brothers .........

Being able to debug my brain. But then again, I'll probably crash it. So nevermind

Too many conditions in my brain not allowing me to code a single line.

Spent a little more than an a hour trying to figure out why an octopus deployment tool isn't picking up my project definitions.
Called a colleague to help me, as I explain the situation to him I find out that I created *.yaml files instead of *.yml
Wtf brain! Y u do this brain?

Can't you just use your brain before coming to me for help??!!! The button says "use another account" so, yes, it is the correct thing to click if you want to USE ANOTHER ACCOUNT!!!

Tetris is my own brain relief

When I first met the Logo turtle I was hooked. Then learned Pascal. Saw recursion and my brain exploded. 23 years and still love it every day 🐢

In no particular order:
1. Sense of accomplishment.
2. Keeping my brain busy.
3. Working with smart people.

Was in a meeting. Someone said "fuck records". I was like lol wtf then my brain just realized that he just said "fact records" Lol haha the hell 🤯😂

Not being able to look at people’s faces in person.
My autistic empathic mind-reading hyperperception works best when it has a lot of data, e.g. when visual contact isn’t obstructed by a video compression algorithm. Without that sense, my brain has to work extra hard to read minds. It becomes exhausting. When I don’t have this power for some reason, I feel very anxious. In absence of data, a naturally anxious and depressed brain assumes the worst.

I was assigned a task to troubleshoot some buggy code. I am a developer and I don’t know how to get started. Does anyone else experience this kind of anxiety? Where you’re asked to apply your skills and suddenly your brain just shuts down and you feel like you know exactly nothing? I’m older than most coders in my field. Onset of some kind of brain disorder?

Installed minimal Debian now have to reboot system and install the full system. My brain is running full speed right now!

That's an easy one ! My Brain and willpower !

do you guys also dream about code or is that just my brain? i swear to god, if i see something awful at work i dream of a way to fix it

My thoughts right now:

1. If waifus exist (Alice lol), where are all the husbandus?
2. I want a cheeseburger
3. The picture. My brain in a test.

JavaScript makes my brain ache.

Total brain crash...
Was writing a word doc.
Got interrupted by a colleague
When i got back to the doc my brain instinctively told me: "You idiot, you can't write anything while debug is running"

Spent a whole 5 mins trying to find stop button... wait... this is word....

Is this a bug in my brain?