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Imagine if a structural engineer whose bridge has collapsed and killed several people calls it a feature.
Imagine if that structural engineer made a mistake in the tensile strength of this or that type of bolt and shoved it under the rug as "won't fix".
Imagine that it's you who's relying on that bridge to commute every day. Would you use it, knowing that its QA might not have been very rigorous and could fail at any point in time?
Seriously, you developers have all kinds of fancy stuff like Continuous Integration, Agile development, pipelines, unit testing and some more buzzwords. So why is it that the bridges don't collapse, yet new critical security vulnerabilities caused by bad design, unfixed bugs etc appear every day?
Your actions have consequences. Maybe not for yourself but likely it will have on someone else who's relying on your software. And good QA instead of that whole stupid "move fast and break things" is imperative.
Software developers call themselves the same engineers as the structural engineer and the electrical engineer whose mistakes can kill people. I can't help but be utterly disappointed with the status quo in software development. Don't you carry the title of the engineer with pride? The pride that comes from the responsibility that your application creates?
I wish I'd taken the blue pill. I didn't want to know that software "engineering" was this bad, this insanity-inducing.
But more than anything, it surprises me that the world that relies so much on software hasn't collapsed in some incredible way yet, despite the quality of what's driving it.44 -
*Makes joke in dev community*
RandomGuy: "well actually, that's not correct. The truth is blah blah blah"
Can you please just for like 5mins enjoy the joke and have a laugh?
All you're doing is stroking your own ego.3 -
Management:
"We're gonna make our own builder that sets up pre configured files.
So we are gonna get rid again of GIT, because with our system you shouldnt be working over each others files if you keep out of other peoples files."
So they basically are saying, we are going back to no version control because you should all keep to the honor system because our system is better.
I'm fucking leaving...
And possibly leaving a poison pill to boot12 -
I started coding in 1994 making .BAT menus for my DOS games. Used HELP.EXE to find commands I could use. Then I figured out how to modify and run GORILLA.BAS (using Q-Basic). Man, when I realized that all BASIC commands were in the OS documentation as well, that was the Red Pill! Just started to copy commands and blocks from the Gorillas game into a new program, read the doc, modify, run and learn. Btw, the first BASIC command I played with was "PLAY" (for music).
At that time I was 10 and there was no Stackoverflow, no Youtube, no tutorials, no Google... no easy path to follow down the rabbit hole.
Ref: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/...
10 -
Beginner: I wrote 1,000 lines of code!
Intermediate: I deleted 1,000 lines of code!
Expert: I prevented code from being written!1 -
instead of ranting why php sucks or your co-worker being an ass in coding, why not have some of this?
12 -
This spring I was working on a library for an algorithm class at uni with some friends and one of the algorithm was extremely slow, we were using Python to study graphs of roads on a map and a medium example took about 6-7h of commission to finish (I never actually waited for so long, so maybe more).
I got so pissed of for that code that I left the lab and went to eat. Once I got back I rewrote just the god-damned data structure we were using and the time got down to 300ms. Milliseconds!
Lessons learned:
- If you're pissed go take a walk and when you'll come back it will be much easier;
- Don't generalize to much a library, the data structure I write before was optimized for a different kind of usage and complete garbage for that last one;
- Never fucking use frozen sets in Python unless you really need them, they're so fricking slow!3 -
My favorite method?
Step 1: Meet Morpheus
Step 2: Swallow red pill
Step 3: Wake up from the Matrix
Step 4: Upload needed Knowledge directly to my brain
Step 5: Go back to Matrix4 -
First year at uni, during c++ basis.
The professor has just finished explaining the while cycle.
Professor: We want the code to print all numbers from 0 to 40 using a counter. How would you do?
Classmate puts up his hand: we do 40 if statements and when we reach the 40th one we stop.
Professor: *face palm*9 -
I write blocks of code like this:
If(condition){
code
}
I'm trying to fix a bug and the previous dev is doing it like this:
If(condition)
{
code
}
Does anyone know any good nerve calming pill ? 😜19 -
Unfortunately it's same old same old.
Deadline approaching, changes keep coming in.
Deadline gets extended due to influx of change requests. Director says "ah the deadline is put back, that means we can add in even more functionality"
Anyone got a cyanide pill handy?4 -
I wanted to be a dev when the only on campus job that paid more than minimum wage was titled "Web Developer". It paid 13 bucks / hour. AWYEAH.
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Top advice to give to a new dev? Go back in time and download devRant, then buy a rubber ducky. Yes, I finally got mine 👍🏻
3 -
I need to stop sacrificing readability for smaller amounts of code. What looks good to me isn’t always best for everyone and that’s a fucking tough pill to swallow.4
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Blue pill: master LITERALLY every computer language on earth and be able to use them to their full potential to create LITERALLY any idea that comes to you.
Red pill: master LITERALLY every linguistic language that exists and be able to speak fluently with every human on earth
...........................
I picked the blue pill and people thought I'm weird.
14 -
Hard pill to swallow:
If you get hired as a full stack dev and then complain that you're doing 3 people's (or more) jobs while getting paid for 1,
You had it coming.2 -
“I sent a document to print but it hasn't come out... I think the printer might be broken”
NO! The printer is not BROKEN just because you can’t print. You see that person over there at the printer? Yes, that one collecting their print job now? THE PRINTER IS NOT BROKEN! -
Went to the mall with mom the other day,
Mum: so what do you want?
Me: (pointing to stress ball) that ball
Mum: stop embarrassing us, are you a kid?
Me: they are stress balls
Mum: take a pill or exercise if you stressed
My mind: I told you not to go the mall with your, fucking kid....
devrant a ni**a really need them stress balls9 -
Spent 3 hours today digging through 3rd party libraries, trying to get them all to work together nicely.
The solution? A one line fix in my own source.
FACEPALM!!! -
Tried getting enough sleep for the Monday and failed miserably.
First, I made my kids washed, like usual, around 6pm. Then tried to put them to sleep. The younger one went to sleep, the older refused. Wanted to play, run, jump, sing and scream. After an half an hour his screaming woke up younger. Now I had two kids to put to sleep back again.
The younger is one year old and requires more attention, otherwise cries.
After serious fight the older was forced to sleep. He tried to jump over me, bite me, kick, hit, eat chocolate, wanted to pee, then jump, run and fight again. I ended up lying him forcibly in the bed, holding his hand by kind of a block, so that he couldn't move to much. Took 15 minutes, but he felt asleep. It was 22. Joys of having 3yo kid.
After more 30 minutes and a bottle of milk the 1yo was sleeping.
At 2am the older woke and cried. I woke, tried to make him calm, he pushed me away and went back to sleep. Now it's 3:40, my sleeping pill wore off, and I won't take another one, because I need to get up at six.
This is how you get a good night's sleep before having a busy week.11 -
When you're sick of Arch Linux ability to brick your system and you try to install a more stable distro like Linux mint.
18 -
Someone just guessed my 20+ character one time password on Microsoft 🤔 2 factor authentication and Geo IP checking are definitely good features.
Well, time to change all my passwords.8 -
$ rsync /media/elements /media/data
... Why the fuck are existing files being synchronized as well.. they're the exact goddamn files rsync!!!
^Z
$ stat /media/elements/some.file
$ stat /media/data/some.file
Hmm 🤔 so they've got the same access and modify times, same size and everything, just that the change time is different.. well, guess I'll have to bite the pill then, syncing everything it is 🙁
Next day: rsync aborted because disk quota is exceeded
What the...
*Checks storage consumption on /media/data*
COMPLETELY FILLED TO THE BRIM
Oh God 😰 I didn't completely copy over a duplicate of that elements directory, did I?
$ ls -sh /media/data/elements
*exists*
$ du -sh /media/data/elements
1.4TB
But why..? All because I forgot a single / in my rsync command.
Please kill -9 me 🙂🔫1 -
A few years ago I would whine, complain and rant about shitty software, which I knew could be so much better than it was. But I didn't yet write software of my own.
Now I complain about shitty libraries, API's and users. Not much has changed really. And every time I write code, I curse myself, and whoever made this trashpile I have to work with. I curse the user to the moon and beyond for using the program wrong. Funny thing is, exactly the thing I was complaining about (input validation, see earlier rant) is also exactly what no more than 5 minutes after release, a user fucked up with. The bot just does not respond at this point. But fuck these braindead retards for users.
In a few years I expect myself to be complaining about shitty compilers and buffer overflows, segmentation violations, bad coding style (don't make your program a fucking colander kthx), and so on.
Next decade I expect myself to be complaining about physics itself, and why the universe is governed by the laws it's governed by. Whoever this God is, he's a fucking retard. Funny thing is, the signs for it are already there. Electron theory! If only those electrons were positrons, then the math would check out properly. Instead of negative electrons traveling from negative to positive, we'd have positive positrons traveling from positive to negative. At least from what I understand so far, this is still a decade away after all.
The point I'm trying to make is that nothing changes, only my understanding of the world around me does, as I tumble further and further down the rabbit hole. Sometimes I wish I had taken the blue pill... Either complain about others' software or perhaps not give a shit at all. Become one of those filthy users I now despise.1 -
Wait this is crazy!
Well I'm not an anxious or depressed type.
But no melatonin pill = no sleep
Worst part is no sleep during the day cause of sun light.
Even taking pills won't guarantee my sleep .
Yes I told my doc and he said "just relax , limit your caffeine "
Have you experienced this?31 -
"This is your last chance. After this, there is no turning back. You take the blue pill - the story ends, you wake up in your bed and believe whatever you want to believe. You take the red pill - you stay in Wonderland and I show you how deep the rabbit-hole goes."
Said to a new team member before they embarked on a journey of pain as I took them through a huge web app made with jQuery (think: 10K lines of DOM manipulation horror), WCF, and sadness. -
// This part of the code should never run
Came across that lovely comment when fixing a reported bug. Guess where the bug was? You guessed it XD1 -
After I received my laser eye surgery, I knew it would become painful after the effect of anesthesia would decrease so I got painkillers in advance.
It was nimesulide.
Even in 2008 ISDB raised a concern about the liver damage and asked for it to be withdrawn worldwide, but I didn't knew it.
So the terrible pain started and I took the pill. Just. One. Pill.
This all started in like fifteen minutes. Eye pain won't go away, but it didn't mattered anymore as I felt really terrible. I never experienced that kind of feeling before and I don't even know how to describe it. It felt like a terrible sensation inside my stomach mixed with an urge to vomit. "This is probably what a liver failure feels like. This is it, I'm going do die here", I remember thinking about as I collapsed.
This whole incident led to an investigation about why the doctors "forgot" to give me proper eye anesthesia drops. This got several doctors fired.
This all got me really interested in how different medications work. I started casually reading popular medical literature and when my depression came, I was prepared, as much as you can even get prepared to a mental disorder.
The thing that probably nearly killed me helped me not to lose my sanity later.4 -
Everyday I get on my train, get off and go into the office, get some coffee, and sit down at my desk.
Everyday, all of us take a Blue Pill, and focus in on this world they give us. We don't consider this a part of our life. Brushing our teeth, flossing, making breakfast, sleeping .. those are also not our life.
Life are all the other things outside of the routine.
But we spend more time in our routine. We spend more time in our loops than outside of them.
Brushing your teeth, making coffee, coding at work, eating, sleeping: these things are your life.
All those other things, they're the escape from it.6 -
A headache starts popping in my head like modals and popups on websites, so I decide I should take a pill and proceed to get myself some water (yeah, I cannot stand headaches for more than 2 minutes).
As I enter, the room is only populated with the "cleaning lady" (she's quite aged), I tell her "hi" and proceed to grab a glass of water.
"Hey, you are good in IT right?"
Oh fuck.
RUNNNNN.
That lady is impossible to escape once she wants to talk to you.
So my skills as a developer were used to configure her facebook...
Hope my headache starts leaving soon, it worsened by a factor of 9000 after that traumatic episode.1 -
My New medication is !AMAZING....
Yesterday went to the Doc (another 100€ sniff) and got a new update on medication...
(check my profile history for the posts last weekend if ya curious).
One of them must be opium or something... I got so high It looked like Opium (I never did heavy drugs).
Now I'm falling all the time, Can't remember much last night and... man... I use/used Cannabis as medicine for years (on and off as needed) ... Still, remember when I could get high... And the highest time was when I learned cannabis it's great to stop suicide (A friend got me so stoned I couldn't move... Even if didn't really take out the tendencies and thoughts to kill yourself, you can't do it anyway...)
But this new Pill... ONLY SHEEAAATTTT...
Only problem,,, I can't really do shit Until my body gains tolerance... and I was doing so much cool ideas in my Office...
Btw, no more Space Again... The more drawers I place, the more stuff gets here...
But I think I'll lose all my energy again for the next months, so, fuck it.3 -
We are all about structures, clean code and many other things that make our life easier, right?
Well... It's not all white and black...
As talked many times, projects can be rushed... Client budgets can be low at the start and only then grow...
Let me take an example:
Client X needs a tool that helps his team perform jobs faster. They have a $500 budget. So... Testing, clean architecture and so on - are not really a viable option. Instead, you just make it work and perform that task as needed. So the code has minimal patterns, minimal code structure, a lot of repetitive parts and so on.
Now... Imagine that 3 months pass by without any notice and clients are ultra happy with the product. They want more things to be automated. They contact developers and ask for more things. This time they have a bigger budget but short timeframe.
So once again, you ignore all tests, structure and just make it work. No matter what. The client is happy again.
A year passes and the client realizes that their workflow changed. The app needs total refactoring. The previous developer has no time for adjustments at this point and hires a new company. They look at the code and rants spill out of their mouth along with suicidal thoughts.
So... What would you do? Would you rant about "messy project" or just fix it? Especially since people now have a bigger budget and timeframe to adapt to changes.
Would you be pissed on such a project?
Would you flame on previous devs?
Would you blame anyone for the mess?
Or would you simply get in and get the job done since the client has a "prototype" and needs a better version of it?
---
Personally, I've been in this situation A LOT. And I'm both, the old and new dev. I've built tons of crappy software to make things work for clients and after years - they come back for changes/new things. You just swallow the pill and do what is needed. Why? Well, because it's an internal system and not used by anyone outside their office. Even if it's used outside the office - prototyping is the key. They didn't know if the idea would work or be helpful in any way. Now they know and want it done correctly.6 -
They will be the first stickers on my laptop. Thanks devRant for hours of fun in this great community!
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The button radius for the Android Pie pill and back button really pisses me off.
I can't tell you how many times my fat ass finger has accidentally pressed home trying to go back in an app.
Having said that, it's still a looot better than the old soft buttons.2 -
It all began during November 5th--a regular day like any other, about to become the weirdest of them all.
I swallowed a funny looking pill.5 -
That amazing feeling one feels all over their body when they finally crack the problem they have been trying to solve for weeks.
Feels amazing. I need more of that. In a pill form. Thanks.6 -
Last weekend I was working on a small project for a friend of mine: a dockerized webapp, plus API backend and DB. I had some problems with the installation on the vps and had to try out different images and never really did a complete setup of my usual dotfiles. Got it running on an Ubuntu distro. Everything great.
It was the first release so I still had to check that every configuration worked ok, like letsencrypt companion container, the reverse proxy and all that stuff, so I decided to clone the whole project on the server tho make the changes there and then commit them from there.
Docker compose, 10 lines of code, change the hosts and password. Boom everything working. Great... Except for the images in the webapp.
WTF? Check the repo, here they are, all ok. I try different build tactics. Nothing. Even building the app on another docker always the same. Checked browser cache, all the correct ports are open. I even though that maybe react was still using some weird websocket I didn't know, but no.
Damn, I spent 5 hours checking why the f*** the server wouldn't make it out.
Then, finally, the realization...
I didn't install the f******* git-lfs plugin and all I was working with were stupid symbolics links! Webpack never even throw an error for any of the stupid images and the browser would only show a corrupted image, when decoding the base64 string.
Literally the solution took 5 minutes.
F*** changes on production, now I do everything on a fully automated CI. -
AppStore says "We're working hard on getting all the 🐛s squashed so please bear with us."
I says "WHAT 🐛s?!" devRant is the 💣1 -
Morpheus: Do you want to know what is the Dark Side, Neo?
Neo swallows and nods his head.
Morpheus: Unfortunately, no one can be told what the Dark Side is. You have to see it for yourself.
Neo: How?
In Neo's right hand, Morpheus drop a red pill in his left, a blue pill.
Morpheus: If you take the red pill, you will join the Dark Side. If you take the blue one, the story will end. After this, there is no going back.
Remember that all I am offering is the truth. Nothing more.
Neo opens his mouth and swallows the red pill.
So... are you brave enough like Neo, to join the Dark Side?
5 -
What it feels like when you tell a newbie coder about reflection and all the stuff you can do with it.
3 -
I started playing around with computers when I was about 3 years old, than at 12 my "Technology" teacher showed us a programmer he and his colleagues made, a free and open source version of Logo, logoit. You could control a turtle and make it draw lines on a plan. Than I got into c++ and web development.
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Dude in my Calc 2 class just bitched about iPhones having "shitty software" referencing that bug from around ~6 years ago, when a specific iMessage text would reboot your phone. IMO, 99% of what Apple does well is software. UI is subjective, but final cut pro is unbelievable in terms of functionality for its price, their software is so well optimized that iPhones have been able to use comparably tiny batteries and still compete. They are consistent throughout their company with software design, while companies like Google are so stratified it took years before their material design had been implemented in all their services, there are still a few that aren't (not to mention the meme of Google killing off all their projects). I hate tablets, but the iPad pro has the best software/hardware implementation of any I've ever seen. Apple's interconnectivity between devices is unbelievable, whether it's Continuity features or the setup process just recognizing group devices around and pulling data to create consistent account info and saving you taps. Siri is shit, but apart from that their software isn't bad enough that you should complain about that instead of...
Their Macs are fucking pressure-cookers, and their fuckin marketing department is like a different company all-together, and their anti-fix-it-yourself policies are so user hostile that they're toe-to-toe with being as abusive to customers as Oracle.
TL;DR the biggest scam Apple has pulled off is not that the sheep still think Android and PC users are living in 2010, but they've convinced the sheep that they know what shitty software is. At that point they're too many levels deep and there is no red-pill strong enough for them.2 -
One week worth of pills for me as a Bipolar-I + Autism + ADHD patient. I have to take them all just to stay sane, productive and anxiety-free, at least partially. Here’s what’s here:
- Hydroxysine — a non-benzo (read not addictive) anti-anxiety pill
- Quetiapine + Lamotrigine — the number one anti-bipolar combo
- Atomoxetine — a non-amphetamine anti-ADHD pill
- Fluvoxamine — an antidepressant with anti-anxiety side effects
45 -
Gotta love when you come across an interesting piece of software with a modern, sleek, and snazzy homepage. Then you press "Sign up" and are redirected to an ancient 90's web app whose first element after the body is a table.
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I am real tired of learning new stuff every day to keep up with technology I just wish someone invent some sort of pill, so when angular js, 3.0 released or vuejs or python or ruby or any new discovery , we just go buy a pill drink it and get smart, sorry if I offended you that how dum i am and that's how I feel lmao3
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I hope there's a pill that I could take to master vim and tiling desktop in an instant. I feel so envious just by looking at a co-worker who's good with that and rocking a cool tiny 60% keyboard. I'm TOO damn comfortable with the normies way of computing.2
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About to work on a small feature for my job's web app since I took a caffeine pill to finish up a college assignment. It's 12:34am; at least it's just a column addition to the DB.
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The more you achieve, the more you are pushing yourself beyond (and away) from everyone else. From your environment. It's just statistics. Thus, the peak transhumanist becomes completely alone.
But, our achievements that literally fight nature are responsible for prolonging our life expectancy, eradicating disease, all other heights we ascended upon.
Transhumanism and environmentalism are opposing philosophical concepts. But with the very first paracetamol pill you voluntarily took because you chose not to feel the pain, you accepted transhumanism.
Transhumanism and environmentalism are opposing philosophical concepts. If so, environmentalism is death.
Transhumanism is life. -
Angular gets shit done. So we basically bake cookies in their angular-cli? Its fuarking great! I choose the RED pill!2
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when your best friend brings you to a psychiatrist, you take the pill he gave you and your friend starts to disappear5
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Ending my Web Technology project for uni listening to "Requiem for a dream"
Link for additional sensations:
https://open.spotify.com/track/...
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