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Search - "spots"
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!n case someone is unfamiliar with this joke ::
A man flying in a hot air balloon suddenly realizes he’s lost. He reduces height and spots a man down below. He lowers the balloon further and shouts to get directions, "Excuse me, can you tell me where I am?"
The man below says: "Yes. You're in a hot air balloon, hovering 30 feet above this field."
"You must work in Information Technology," says the balloonist.
"I do" replies the man. "How did you know?"
"Well," says the balloonist, "everything you have told me is technically correct, but It's of no use to anyone."
The man below replies, "You must work in management."
"I do," replies the balloonist, *"But how'd you know?"**
"Well", says the man, "you don’t know where you are or where you’re going, but you expect me to be able to help. You’re in the same position you were before we met, but now it’s my fault."6 -
A man flying in a hot air balloon suddenly realizes he’s lost. He reduces height and spots a man down below. He lowers the balloon further and shouts to get directions, "Excuse me, can you tell me where I am?"
The man below says: "Yes. You're in a hot air balloon, hovering 30 feet above this field."
"You must work in Information Technology," says the balloonist.
"I do" replies the man. "How did you know?"
"Well," says the balloonist, "everything you have told me is technically correct, but It's of no use to anyone."
The man below replies, "You must work in management."
"I do," replies the balloonist, "But how'd you know?"*
"Well", says the man, "you don’t know where you are or where you’re going, but you expect me to be able to help. You’re in the same position you were before we met, but now it’s my fault."10 -
A man flying in a hot air balloon suddenly realizes he’s lost. He reduces height and spots a man down below. He lowers the balloon further and shouts to get directions, "Excuse me, can you tell me where I am?"
The man below says: "Yes. You're in a hot air balloon, hovering 30 feet above this field."
"You must work in Information Technology," says the balloonist.
"I do" replies the man. "How did you know?"
"Well," says the balloonist, "everything you have told me is technically correct, but It's of no use to anyone."
The man below replies, "You must work in management."
"I do," replies the balloonist, "But how'd you know?"*
"Well", says the man, "you don’t know where you are or where you’re going, but you expect me to be able to help. You’re in the same position you were before we met, but now it’s my fault."1 -
A man flying in a hot air balloon suddenly realizes he’s lost. He reduces height and spots a man down below. He lowers the balloon further and shouts to get directions, "Excuse me, can you tell me where I am?"
The man below says: "Yes. You're in a hot air balloon, hovering 30 feet above this field."
"You must work in Information Technology," says the balloonist.
"I do" replies the man. "How did you know?"
"Well," says the balloonist, "everything you have told me is technically correct, but It's of no use to anyone."
The man below replies, "You must work in management."
"I do," replies the balloonist, *"But how'd you know?"**
"Well", says the man, "you don’t know where you are or where you’re going, but you expect me to be able to help. You’re in the same position you were before we met, but now it’s my fault."5 -
A man flying in a hot air balloon suddenly realizes he’s lost. He reduces height and spots a man down below. He lowers the balloon further and shouts to get directions,"Excuse me, can you tell me where I am?"
The man below says: "Yes. You're in a hot air balloon, hovering 30 feet above this field."
"You must work in Information Technology,"says the balloonist.
"I do" replies the man. "How did you know?"
"Well," says the balloonist, "everything you have told me is technically correct, but It's of no use to anyone."
The man below replies, "You must work in management."
"I do," replies the balloonist, "But how'd you know?"*
"Well", says the man, "you don’t know where you are or where you’re going, but you expect me to be able to help. You’re in the same position you were before we met, but now it’s my fault.2 -
A man flying in a hot air balloon suddenly realizes he’s lost. ♨💨🎈
He reduces height and spots a man down below.
He lowers the balloon further and shouts to get directions,
"Excuse me, can you tell me where I am?"
The man below says:
"Yes. You're in a hot air balloon, hovering 30 feet above this field."
"You must work in Information Technology," says the balloonist.
"I do" replies the man. "How did you know?"
"Well," says the balloonist, "everything you have told me is technically correct, but It's of no use to anyone."
The man below replies, "You must work in management."
"I do," replies the balloonist, "But how'd you know?"
"Well", says the man “you don’t know where you are or where you’re going, but you expect me to be able to help. You’re in the same position you were before we met, but now it’s my fault."7 -
When I was in 7th grade, my neighbor (a DoD programmer) challenged me to write a sorting algorithm for a hypothetical super limited environment (he said a satellite). It didn’t have any built-in sorting methods, had very limited memory, slow processor, etc. so I needed to be clever about it.
It took me a few nights before i found a solution he liked. The method I came up with counted the number of occurrences of each number in the array and put them in the appropriate spots in a new array. This way it only required O(2n) running time and 2n memory.
I just learned today that this is called the “counting sort” 😄
I’m proud of little 11 year old me.20 -
A man flying in a hot air balloon suddenly realizes he’s lost. He reduces height and spots a man down below. He lowers the balloon further and shouts to get directions,"Excuse me, can you tell me where I am?"
The man below says: "Yes. You're in a hot air balloon, hovering 30 feet above this field."
"You must work in Information Technology,"says the balloonist.
"I do" replies the man. "How did you know?"
"Well," says the balloonist, "everything you have told me is technically correct, but It's of no use to anyone."
The man below replies, "You must work in management."
"I do," replies the balloonist, "But how'd you know?"*
"Well", says the man, "you don’t know where you are or where you’re going, but you expect me to be able to help. You’re in the same position you were before we met, but now it’s my fault."2 -
Me: tried to HTML like a sad anime girl
(someone spots me)
Dude: yo you're good (I'm just making a bouncing ball in HTML in peace) wanna join our group?
Me: uh sure
(Finds out I just entered a coding competition group going to be sent somewhere minutes later after being added to the Telegram group)
Fuck me3 -
A man flying in a hot air balloon suddenly realizes he’s lost. He reduces height and spots a man down below. He lowers the balloon further and shouts to get directions, "Excuse me, can you tell me where I am?"
The man below says: "Yes, you're in a hot air balloon, hovering 30 feet above this field."
"You must work in Information Technology," says the balloonist.
"I do" replies the man. "How did you know?"
"Well," says the balloonist, "everything you have told me is technically correct, but it's of no use to anyone."
The man below replies, "You must work in management."
"I do" replies the balloonist, "But how'd you know?"
"Well", says the man, "you don’t know where you are, or where you’re going, you expect me to be able to help. You’re in the same position you were before we met, but now it’s my fault."5 -
Customer service fun!
*remotes in to see customer's browser*
Customer: You can only see my browser window, right?
*now does obligatory scan of the rest of the screen to see _why_ customer felt the need to say that, spots suggestively-named JPGs...*
Me: Yes, ma'am! Only your browser window. You said the issue was...4 -
A man flying in a hot air balloon suddenly realizes he’s lost. He reduces height and spots a man down below. He lowers the balloon further and shouts to get directions, "Excuse me, can you tell me where I am?"
The man below says: "Yes. You're in a hot air balloon, hovering 30 feet above this field."
"You must work in Information Technology," says the balloonist.
"I do" replies the man. "How did you know?"
"Well," says the balloonist, "everything you have told me is technically correct, but It's of no use to anyone."
The man below replies, "You must work in management."
"I do," replies the balloonist, "But how'd you know?"*
"Well", says the man, "you don’t know where you are or where you’re going, but you expect me to be able to help. You’re in the same position you were before we met, but now it’s my fault."1 -
>Firefox randomly freezes
>Opens taskmanager
>spots Cortana running but "suspended"
>kills Cortana
>Firefox unfreezes
DAFAK MICROSOFT, GO FUCK OFF WITH YOUR FUCKING USELESS PIECE OF SHIT CORTANA19 -
Holy shit, I'm really impressed with the high tech park my dentist has. She takes pictures of a tooth, a computer makes a 3D model out of that, then she grinds down the tooth as necessary and takes pictures again.
From the difference, the computer generates the data for the tooth crown, including warning spots where it could be too thin so that a bit more grinding is needed.
Then she corrects some spots manually and sends it over to the CNC machine in the next room that cuts the thing from a ceramics block with correct colour. Some heat treatment later, and the tooth crown fits perfectly.
Gone are the days with dental imprints, provisional crown and not quite fitting final crown.2 -
Weirdest thing happened to me today.
My teacher spots me browsing "Hack This Site" and I'm sent to the tech lab for a "diagnostic test" ?????1 -
A few days ago I went to my local bank again to check my balance and see whether some transfers that I've been waiting for have been completed.. as I was walking there - headphones on, music full blast - I was zoning out a bit. Of course I was, not like I have to mind cars in the middle of bumfuck here. There's hardly any in this town. So meh.
Now that day there was one.. I was just about to cross the road and suddenly looked left, and there it was. A mindless meatbag behind the wheel of a killing machine - an average driver. Visibly startled I suddenly stopped and waited for her to drive away. At this point she was about 20-ish meters away and already stopped. Come on bitch.. I already stopped and I am not going to cross this road as long as you're here. Hit the fucking pedal.
So she accelerated again.. and drove to the parking spot at the other side of the road, then stopped there. Oh, cool. Maybe she needs to be somewhere in this town. … Not at all. Bitch accelerates again, and stops yet again 2 parking spots further. What the fuck (ಠ_ಠ).. and I thought that I was an idiot...
Then she accelerates yet again and drives away. Looked after her, astonished by the amount of brain damage she just caused to me. Must've been a Facebook user.. holy fucking shit. Through what kind of black magic do these people get a driver's license?!4 -
I am a student. A Geospatial Engineering student. I made a demo Cordova app mapping incident spots on OSM., now my fellow undergrads think I can hack NSA, program a satellite, build all their dream websites and apps. The College Department wants me to lead an in-house photogrammetric programmable drone project. If they ask I'll say yes... yes I can! shit.😂5
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I'm cracking up...
"chatGPT will ruin the software interviewing industry!!!"
uh.... what does it tell you about our industry if a fucking ROBOT can "ruin" the interview
well, you're right. it tells you that only algorithmic robots do well and subsequently earn the top spots at software companies after interviewing.
creativity, grit, perspective, wisdom? that stuff is absolute bullshit!!! (and as a feeble human I can't figure that out in an interview anyway!!! better just have you solve leetcode problems ad naseum!!! that'll get us the best employee!!!)
god i hate the dumb fuck rat race. good thing i'm not in it anymore! peace out, girl scout✌️5 -
A man flying in a hot air balloon suddenly realizes he’s lost. He reduces height and spots a man down below. He lowers the balloon further and shouts to get directions, "Excuse me, can you tell me where I am?"
The man below says: "Yes. You're in a hot air balloon, hovering 30 feet above this field."
"You must work in Information Technology," says the balloonist.
"I do" replies the man. "How did you know?"
"Well," says the balloonist, "everything you have told me is technically correct, but It's of no use to anyone."
The man below replies, "You must work in management."
"I do," replies the balloonist, "But how'd you know?"*
"Well", says the man, "you don’t know where you are or where you’re going, but you expect me to be able to help. You’re in the same position you were before we met, but now it’s my fault."3 -
Never ever open a computer while breathing...
I got a ticket to fix a computer from the production line that was turning itself off...
When I opened it, a dark dust from hell came right into my lungs... There were more dust in there than I've ever seen in my entire life... Combined...
I'm still sneezing 3 hours later, and a few black spots keep coming out with everything else...4 -
A colleague went to work in his mobile home since he has to spend a few days in our office and he refuses to go on hotel. My office is above a shop and we share our parking.
Now one of the employees of the shop just entered in our office and bitched that the mobile home is taking in too many parking spots.
The parking is more than half empty :')7 -
Feels good to brought dead laptop to life.
Got dead laptop(person who gave it to me for free, said it doesn't turn on, and he got new one and this one is just for recycling), which got some liquid. Changed palmrest, keyboard, changed cable which is connecting to io board with power button, changed thermal paste and it working like a charm. Maybe in the future I will change screen. Screen has some pink spots, but it's only visible on dar theme. Added 16 GB ram, 512 gb ssd. Now I am using it as work computer. Dell Latitude E74507 -
Anyone else have trouble with real life common sense?
Story time:
Yesterday Evening a dog chased my best mate's cat up a tree. Being the genius I am, I decided to climb after the adorable bugger. Fell from about 8-10ft onto concrete slabs on my back.
Main thing first: I got lucky, CTs and X-rays showed no lasting damage. I'm back home and safe now.
What got me was going through the hospital having to hear the story of how I fell out of a tree onto my back and head like an idiot... from medical person to medical person.
I was lying in the bed, thinking "I swear I'm competent!? Why do people trust me!?"
Does anyone else have any weird skill black spots, or common sense break downs?7 -
Last office building I worked at, the company across the hall recycled old PCs for businesses. They had two reserved parking spots in the building parking lot right up front. The signs read "Employee of the Month"
Every day when I came in the owner's $80k luxury car was parked in the middle of both spots. -
I don't understand 'flex' work spots, meaning you choose a different place to sit every day at work. I am a tiny person and most of the people I will work with are giant dutch guys. I need a low ass desk and chair so I can actually see my screen and touch the fucking floor. Let me have my spot, thank you.5
-
I tried LSD yesterday!
Backstory: I have a weird combo of bipolar type 1 and autism. During the day, my brain works inconsistently. Here how my day usually goes:
09:00. I wake up. Uninterested, cold, masculine. No thoughts in the background. No OCD.
12:00. Brain warms up. Thought process begins. Thoughts are short in their length
14:00. Thoughts start to get longer. Stress starts to accumulate. Background thoughts start, now typically 2–3 at a time.
16:00. Twitching begins. Thought chains are now 5–6 concepts long, one following the other. Perception level rises quickly. I start to feel more feminine. It is in this state that I start to spot imperfections and mistakes looking at code or text without reading it. I see it like a painting, and mistakes appear as “visually wrong” parts. This does not depend on formatting.
17:00. OCD becomes more severe. I HAVE to touch all the surfaces around me, evenly, as if my hands were text highlighters, and I had to paint everything evenly, without overlaps or spots that are brighter or darker than the others. Some surface textures become irritating, and feel quite unpleasant to the touch. If I go for a run now, like 3 km or so, I feel somewhat relieved.
18:00. Things are getting serious. Creativity levels through the roof. I speak in long, never-ending, profound sentences. Background and foreground thoughts almost become one. I appear visually drunk and happy, despite never drinking alcohol. Femininity rises even further. Sometimes, when I speak to a small group of people, especially if I go with friends to meet new people, and we go to some bar, new people ask to record my voice or to write down whatever I’m saying. To be honest, this reason alone is a huge boost to how I see yourself.
19:00. OCD is crazy now. Surfaces have soul.
21:00 <— Gotta take my meds and go to sleep here to prevent what comes at 22:00
22:00. All thoughts, both foreground and background, fully became one. Now my brain officially disobeys me and thinks on its own, and I can ride it like a surfer at best. Twitching becomes concerning. I develop a 1000-yard stare. I am officially a female. Physical strength is somewhat enhanced. Pain tolerance lowered significantly.
23:00. Derealization begins. The world around me appears two-dimensional and flat, like a picture. It is hard to get home on foot, even in close (less than one km) proximity. Brain is fully numb. All that thought monstrosity that was building up is just noise now. Zero “flops” available to think about something I want to think about, like how much money I have on me or what time it is.
I go to sleep. I see nightmares. I wake up, and the cycle repeats.
Contrary to a popular opinion, I never take any “brain-boosting” meds like antidepressants, and I think now you can see why. I consume neither alcohol nor caffeine. Neither me, nor my doctors want my brain to explode. I only take lamotrigine that helps to “lower down” mania, and quetiapine, a neuroleptic, that slows down my brain, like a neuroleptic. Both are there to slow down my brain, to kinda “throttle” my brain like a CPU to cool it down.
That said, 100ug of LSD just… brought me my usual 18:00 state, but in the morning?
All that small-dose recreational ordeal? The thing that helps people feel more energetic and creative?
People pay money… for that? To feel the way I feel every evening?10 -
We are so fucked...
-railroads
-highways
-waterways
-?
-super bridges
-fiber optic lines
-?
-4g spots/towers22 -
I hate apples. I buy them at the grocery store. They taste bland, they don't have any smell and by eating them I don't get any positive emotions.
Well, at least this is the conclusion in my head every autumn after a year of eating store bought apples.
Then the end of autumn comes/winter begins and I visit my grandparents, who live in a village. I get a bag of apples (15-20 kgs) and this bag smells wonderful. Heck, the car smells wonderful for a few days after transporting the bag back home.
My grandparents give around 7-8 varieties of apple, mixed. Each and every one of them tastes amazing, even if I have to cut some spots out from a few. They don't always look perfect, but I think these are the noble ones and the store bought would be the peasants.
I know, it's kind of obvious, that the homegrown fruits are better, but it still amazes my tastebuds every year, plus I'm really grateful for having my grandparents.8 -
I'm worried. I would love to internship for my current boss over the summer.
But there are only 4 spots and 10 people competing.
She basically wants an assistant to help with her photography gig. But many of the skills she's asking for are graphic design related minus the website building.
Fingers crossed that what little knowledge I have there can be enough to get me free housing for 8 weeks. Would also love the chance to build a website. Here's to the interview tomorrow.2 -
Working on projects when you're sleep deprived and your hair is falling out is food for nightmares!
Jesus, why am I shedding hair? I'm afraid to look at my scalp and see bald spots.23 -
Oh my god did you know the Windows registry has a folder for icon overlays, like the little checkmarks on OneDrive and Dropbox files?
Guess what. Windows only loads the first like 13 of the registered overlays *in alphabetical order* which has programs fight over the top spots by prepending spaces and whatnot on their registry keys. What a great system...4 -
Somewhere in the svalbard vault where github buried all our code is about two hundred megabytes of pictures of my ass and other pornography stenographically hidden in innocous pictures hosted on github. Why? Because I can.
I did the same thing with stock photography back when I used to be a photographer. If you've used pixabay or a dozen other stock sites theres a good chance you've unwittingly looked at my magnificently sculpted ass (and other parts of me).
Future shenanigans include massive (and unsolicited) deliveries of half finished dildos (courtesy of dildo factory dumpster rejects), public accesible blue tooth speakers put in inaccesible spots, deepfakes of opposing politicians banging uglies, public book burnings not because we hate books but because who the fuck reads anymore?
And orgies, lots of orgies.
Its the end of the world. Let loose with the craziness and party.6 -
Hi everyone here's a question which has caused many arguments in my lurking spots on discord.
What is the worst type of bug? (logic, type, syntax, etc)
//you decide what "worst" means14 -
I once wanted to participate in a free activity that requires signing up for a crappy website.
Unfortunately all spots for the activity I wanted were filled, so I gave it a few minutes and it turned out that the registration is done by sending an HTTP request to a domain with all of the details. So I changed the activity details and selected the hours I wanted and boom - "Thanks for signing up with our site, did you like it ?" Yes.😈 -
I have to say mosh. For those that don't know, it's an extension on SSH for intermittent connections e.g. when on mobile data. I live in an area with several "black spots" and dodgy connections, so I find it really useful.
http://mosh.org1 -
everything microsoft makes is SHIT
for example, windows, and the fact that they bought out minecraft and ruined it with their bullshit "child friendly" feature
vscode's liveshare is ACTUALLY MAKING ME LOSE MY DAMN MIND TRYING TO WORK WITH SOMEONE
just now i was writing code and i realized, it wasn't even updating the file at all, it was just pretending to save changes, while on the hoster's end, nothing changed. at all
i had to rejoin the session 500 times, tell the host to restart, and it was generally a whole nightmare
nothing i typed in applied to the other end, and there were already 50+ errors from nothing in the php file i was working on
and it was erroring out at the most RANDOM spots, where nothing is wrong at all with the code, it was picking up something invalid, but NOT SHOWING ME WHAT WAS WRONG
i rejoined and saw a shit ton of test, an if that i never saw before i rejoined
in general why does everything microsoft make have to be so bad, and unreliable
smh microsoft u can do better4 -
A while ago, i decided to finally learn a bit about the web stack (especially django) and create my first web page. The image shows what it currently looks like.
I am actually very happy with the result. It will be my personal little Home automation software, with progressive apps etc. It runs on the pi plattform and can currently switch an IO to a Relais, which in turn switches on a light.
The applications of this are really endless, which is quite cool and leads me to do more stuff at my home with it. So dear devRant: Does anybody know of some nice hackable light bulbs/spots for my home that i can use? Or other cool hackable hardware that could be applied? -
Okay then, ex-android user there.
It started with Xperia TX - it was flagship Sony phone back then. It blew my mind when I touched it for the first time. You know, exploring android for the first time in my life was amazing.
It ran just well for about a year. Then it started to fall apart. I need to clarify that I kept it non-rooted, full stock. I'm not into that customization things.
At first, I noticed significant lags. They were everywhere. The longer I used smartphone, the more lags I encountered. I did factory reset, but lags haven't gone anywhere.
Year 2. Front camera stopped working. Battery became unreliable as fuck, going down to 40% and then instantly to zero. What?
Year 3. Camera broke. It refused to start, just giving me "Camera is not available" error.
I tried factory reset again. It helped at first, but month have passed and all that issues came back. And it also became sluggish as fuck.
Got Meizu m3s year ago. The exact same story. Long story short, in one year I got this:
1. Black spots on every picture I take. Much likely a matrix issue.
2. Camera also became slow as fuck, requiring about 10 seconds to even start.
3. Vertical stripes all along the screen. I never dropped my phone, it just appeared once and became brighter and brighter every day I used the phone.
4. Two huge yellow spots on screen. I think it happened because phone's cpu heat up the screen and it broke.
But the most important thing is that fucking lags chased me in every app, they were everywhere. Fucking tiny-ass lags. And they're not going anywhere, they're become more and more significant with time.
Don't say me about oneplus, samsungs and other top android phones. They are conceptually the same, the only different thing is hardware.
That's why I switched. IPhone has its downsides, but it's silky smooth. And my friend's iPhone 4 (not s) feels just as smooth as my brand new se.
I'm not going to jailbreak it. I don't need customizing the hell out of it.
I just needed quick and reliable phone, and SE seems to be exactly what I wanted.
Peace to android folks tho✌️17 -
Hi ranters. We need to talk.
I've been thinking, I'm lately getting tired of code everywhere. Suppose one is a software engineer / senior developer. What is one's career path from this point on?
Tech lead? Architect? And then what? Is that all? A dead end?
Management would be also a possibility I guess. But is that a horizontal career change or are there any spots in vertical plane?22 -
!rant
This year marks our 5th anniversary of devopsdays in Amsterdam and the whole team is working hard on making it the most awesome experience of 2017 for anyone interested in the devops movement. :)
I really believe this will make us be less frustrated and rant less! Though, I never want this app to end! =]
But what is an amazing conference without amazing talks? That's where you come into the picture. We have spots open for talks (lightning and non-lightning) and workshops.
If you feel like you have a valuable devops story to share please fill in our CfP here - https://devopsdays.typeform.com/to/... .
You can expect about 300-400 people at a talk and somewhere between 10-30 at workshops.
When is it? 28th-30th of June (2017)
Why Amsterdam? Amsterdam is pretty cool. We make it extra cool and make sure you're never hungry or thirsty.
Hope to see you there!
And I need to see devRanters there to share the best stories!
❤️️ on behalf of the Amsterdam organizers.3 -
So a SQL server walks into a bar to grab a drink. He gets his drink and spots a table with two people sitting down with a spare chair. So he walks up to them and says "Hey, can I JOIN you two?"1
-
"When the light turns green, you go.
When the light turns red, you stop.
But what do you do when the light turns blue with orange and lavender spots?" - Shel Silverstein11 -
So today my company was removing most workspaces with USB 2 connections, DP cables and magsafe 2 power cables. This means that my MBP mid 2014 can't connect to the keyboard and monitors anymore. It already struggled with 4K, so my 2K options were already limited, but now the last few spots are mostly gone. In short: I'm being forced to upgrade.
But tell you what: I don't want to. It feels like a waste to recycle my laptop (even if it's company paid and owned) while it's perfectly acceptably fine. And mind that I will get the latest and greatest i9 for free. Yes, that overheating, throttling failure of hardware design piece of shit. 2 coworkers already own the beast and confirm that it gets really hot really quickly. One of them even has daily crashes (the laptop just turns off) and random reboots. A total waste of money. And my future time. As if it's not enough work to migrate to a new laptop (even with Time Machine).
So, fellow ranters, what do I do? I hope I can leverage the second best MBP (CPU-wise) from this situation, unless there already is a bunch of i9s in the office ready to be used. I really, really don't want one. And I think my current computer is great for what it is, even if it's old. It's a really pro machine for my needs (I'm very efficient, except for Android Studio).
I even consider asking for a Linux machine, but then a whole new world opens to me that may be a step too big (since I barely have hands-down experience).
Enlighten me with your ideas, muggles!5 -
A man flying in a hot air balloon suddenly realizes he’s lost. He reduces height and spots a man down below. He lowers the balloon further and shouts to get directions, "Excuse me, can you tell me where I am?"
The man below says: "Yes. You're in a hot air balloon, hovering 30 feet above this field."
"You must work in Information Technology," says the balloonist.
"I do" replies the man. "How did you know?"
"Well," says the balloonist, "everything you have told me is technically correct, but It's of no use to anyone."
The man below replies, "You must work in management."
"I do," replies the balloonist, *"But how'd you know?"**
"Well", says the man, "you don’t know where you are or where you’re going, but you expect me to be able to help. You’re in the same position you were before we met, but now it’s my fault."1 -
The hype of Artificial Intelligence and Neutral Net gets me sick by the day.
We all know that the potential power of AI’s give stock prices a bump and bolster investor confidence. But too many companies are reluctant to address its very real limits. It has evidently become a taboo to discuss AI’s shortcomings and the limitations of machine learning, neural nets, and deep learning. However, if we want to strategically deploy these technologies in enterprises, we really need to talk about its weaknesses.
AI lacks common sense. AI may be able to recognize that within a photo, there’s a man on a horse. But it probably won’t appreciate that the figures are actually a bronze sculpture of a man on a horse, not an actual man on an actual horse.
Let's consider the lesson offered by Margaret Mitchell, a research scientist at Google. Mitchell helps develop computers that can communicate about what they see and understand. As she feeds images and data to AIs, she asks them questions about what they “see.” In one case, Mitchell fed an AI lots of input about fun things and activities. When Mitchell showed the AI an image of a koala bear, it said, “Cute creature!” But when she showed the AI a picture of a house violently burning down, the AI exclaimed, “That’s awesome!”
The AI selected this response due to the orange and red colors it scanned in the photo; these fiery tones were frequently associated with positive responses in the AI’s input data set. It’s stories like these that demonstrate AI’s inevitable gaps, blind spots, and complete lack of common sense.
AI is data-hungry and brittle. Neural nets require far too much data to match human intellects. In most cases, they require thousands or millions of examples to learn from. Worse still, each time you need to recognize a new type of item, you have to start from scratch.
Algorithmic problem-solving is also severely hampered by the quality of data it’s fed. If an AI hasn’t been explicitly told how to answer a question, it can’t reason it out. It cannot respond to an unexpected change if it hasn’t been programmed to anticipate it.
Today’s business world is filled with disruptions and events—from physical to economic to political—and these disruptions require interpretation and flexibility. Algorithms alone cannot handle that.
"AI lacks intuition". Humans use intuition to navigate the physical world. When you pivot and swing to hit a tennis ball or step off a sidewalk to cross the street, you do so without a thought—things that would require a robot so much processing power that it’s almost inconceivable that we would engineer them.
Algorithms get trapped in local optima. When assigned a task, a computer program may find solutions that are close by in the search process—known as the local optimum—but fail to find the best of all possible solutions. Finding the best global solution would require understanding context and changing context, or thinking creatively about the problem and potential solutions. Humans can do that. They can connect seemingly disparate concepts and come up with out-of-the-box thinking that solves problems in novel ways. AI cannot.
"AI can’t explain itself". AI may come up with the right answers, but even researchers who train AI systems often do not understand how an algorithm reached a specific conclusion. This is very problematic when AI is used in the context of medical diagnoses, for example, or in any environment where decisions have non-trivial consequences. What the algorithm has “learned” remains a mystery to everyone. Even if the AI is right, people will not trust its analytical output.
Artificial Intelligence offers tremendous opportunities and capabilities but it can’t see the world as we humans do. All we need do is work on its weaknesses and have them sorted out rather than have it overly hyped with make-believes and ignore its limitations in plain sight.
Ref: https://thriveglobal.com/stories/...6 -
I'm in Europe and searched for a few spots along my route with Google maps app, the search results contained USA
well done Google.. maybe you need 10 000 new devs to fix that1 -
script closing error-opened tickets from a customer using a tool which just repeatedly clicks on the same pixels over and over again... Error chance of around 50% if other windows open or the ticket window is resized a bit. There was a pretty high risk a real ticket a auto-closed with custoner-information by error...
Everything went well. About 1k tickets were closed by the script while I sat there and looked if it really clicks the right spots. -
Gah. So i replaced my Laptops HDD with an SSD. So far, so cool, but in the process i fucked up the keyboard. Its one of those that kinda click into place. Frames broken in one or two spots and there's a chunk missing at the top. I mean, it still works fine, but it looks ugly where the chunk is missing and the left side feels a bit too soft. And a new keyboard with German Layout would cost almost 70€ (English layout only 30€ WTF!) LENOVO, Y U DO DIS!6
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Oh my... I'm so exhausted and tired of everything. First I got really sick for two weeks and couldn't work. I also collapsed on the floor one night and hurt myself. Well what happens yesterday? You guessed it - I fell down the stairs and hurt exactly the same spots as two weeks ago... (no I was not drunk).
And then I have to work on a holiday today (yes, still with that same fucking shitty shopware project) because I have to attend an appointment in a different country on Thursday (I need Thursday off, but I don't have any vacation left).
So here I'm sitting almost crying in pain because of this FUCKING project, everything hurts, I still can't think straight and shopware is denying my refresh tokens. FUCK THIS JOB. Seriously. Fuck it. I have had the chance to look into a lot of companies and do different things, but this is the worst.
Nobody fucking cared about the project for nearly 8 months, and now that I'm close to leaving the company they begin to act like "oh well it must be done by then". ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME?! I told them a million times I need help and that I won't be able to finish it in time. That's what happens when nobody plans a project, but accepts it anyways because "it brings in money".
Seriously?! This project has been a waste of money and my energy and nerves. We're already 100% over the budget and will never ever see one cent coming from this shitty project. WHY FOR FUCKS SAKE IS IT THAT THOSE PEOPLE JUST DONT SEE IT WHEN A PROJECT IS GOING DOWN THE FUCKING DRAIN?!5 -
Probably my room is where I’m most comfy programming because it’s the place I’m most comfortable in general.
I have a weird unhealthy attachment to my room. When I have to leave to go to a friends and some family’s over night or sumn I am really uncomfortable the entire time until I get back.
I know I’m literally playing into the stereotypical nerd, but what you don’t understand is I am the stereotypical nerd.
You could easily say I just get a really bad case of Home Sickness and I guess that is the case but idk why it’s as bad as it is.
And the honorable mention for programming spots was when I was in high school at my big desk I had for 2 years straight. Damn I loved that spot3 -
It's an oldie, but 1 of my favs :
QA expert decides to go out and have some fun. He walk for a whle spots a random bar and gets inside. After a solid 10+ minutes just looking critically arrond he dicides to stay. Goes to the barplot and orders :
- One beer por favor!
- Here you go - says the barman and continues his job. The man drinks it up quickly and orders again :
- 3 more beers ahora mismo!
- Enjoy - says the barman while serving them.
a few moments later...
- Hey barman, last order and we can round the night up, what ya say?
- ok - simply replies the barman.
- -5 beers! -
Funny login screen bug: the title and the jokes changed, but the image did not.
(This is partly photoshopped, since I couldn't catch all the 3 "hot spots" open together in a single print screen)1 -
TIL the definition of Favela Architecture.
The blue spots are (copied) helper classes and everything is static. -
Coffee + Apple keyboard = I need a new keyboard. ISO 105 layout for Mac (CMD and function keys at the usual spots) are the main requirements. Any suggestions?4
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Does it make sense to buy a Nintendo Switch second hand? What should I look for, besides that the console is clean and the screen has no burn-ins or dead spots?6
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Im writing a thesis for my degree. Does anyone know how to make word automatically update this literature so that the changes reflect in text?
For example the problem im facing is what if i want to insert a new literature between [1] and [2]? Now the new literature becomes [2] and the existing one shifts to [3]. But in the text, the number [2] remains the same, instead of being updated to [3].
Another problem is: what if i delete the whole paragraph that contained references to literature [3] [4] for example? When I do that I'd expect those [3] and [4] points to be deleted in the literature table as well and everything shifts back for 2 spots, but this doesnt happen, it remains in the table while the references no longer exists anywhere in the word document
I have to update manually everywhere and its getting really difficult...
Please help13 -
If I had dev superpowers I would build a program to do pair programming with you. When it spots a mistake it let's you know and shows the best possible solution you should be using instead. #keepOnDreaming
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I like how classes are getting more interesting and challenging But I don’t like how I don’t have time to work on my own projects. I have plans for them and I know where and somewhat how to do things. But between classes, homework, things teachers ask me to do, TA work, and medical issues I don’t have time to do my own thing anymore so GitHub is going to show massive spots of inactivity making me seem dis-interested in things not school related