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Search - "who is he"
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rant && dev && education
So I just interviewed this guy for admission into our bootcamp and because he has raised some red flags before, I asked him to just write a factorial function and he chose HTML to do it. I told him he can certainly try thinking that maybe he doesn't know that whatever you write inside script tag is actually JavaScript. He went on to do this. What bothers me is he have a computer science diploma.
Till now I have just heard of these people but always taught those are just marketing or some person who think that just because they here HTML with some other programming language. BUT THIS IS SOME NEXT LEVEL SHIT.78 -
I asked my friend at work who is the weirdest one?
He said it's me. 😱
Just kidding. 😁
I don't have any friends.
😢😩😥9 -
I was at my uncle's village.
Where getting internet is big thing,very far from main city.
I was talking with one shopkeeper.
I told him ,I am software developer.
He ask me questions that
"How can I improve my business using software?"
To help me figure out situation.
He told me problems he is facing right now.
Accounting/inventory management/contact's with big retailers.
He was so genuinely explaining it.
He don't want next billion dollar startup.
He want to solved his problem.
I am really impressed after that conversation because person who don't know what is excel is talking about ERP software.
I am going to develop that software.
#respect14 -
Who Is Who
➡ A Project Manager is the one who thinks 9 women🙍 can deliver a baby in 1 month.👶
➡ An Onsite Coordinator is the one who thinks 1 woman can deliver 9 babies in 1 month.👶
➡ A Developer is the one who thinks it will take 18 months to deliver 1 baby.🙇
➡ A Marketing Manager is the one who thinks he can deliver a baby even if no man and women are available.👷
➡ A Client is the one who doesn’t know why he wants a baby.👶
➡ A Tester is the one who always tells his wife that this is not the right baby. 🚶
Don't be shy.. Comment which 'who' are you..😂17 -
I have this one friend who thinks he is a tech guru just because he plays video games a lot and started to study cs for one year. Now he got a job as sysadmin and it is funny to hear him brag about the job in front of non-tech people because he sounds like a CSI Cyber episode, just throwing tech words at the people and I know that he talks bullshit.
But I have to admit, he knows how to sell himself. Probably that's how he got the job in the first place because it cannot be his experience.
Yesterday he called me, to help him edit something on a linux server. I told him "To edit the file type 'vi FILENAME' and then you can edit. I have to go now, I have a meeting." :]22 -
While helping my son with his C++ homework I noticed there was an actual shit ton of warnings in the teacher's code.
I'm beginning to think there is some merit in the maxim, "He who can does. He who cannot, teaches."
Uhheesh.3 -
someone who thought me about computer when i was a child. someone who thought me machine code, and cobol. someone who thought me about the world. now he is, my dad, hospitalized again (12th times already this year) for cardiac arrest. and today, he is getting better and showing a lot of progress.
This situation thought me again about how life works and how hard can it be. my dad divorced with my mom since i am 3 months old and i've been living with my aunt since. and now he married again with a women with 2 child. i though he was gonna be happy. and apparently not. at the time of the cardiac arrest, his wife don't even want to bother and getting involved if her husband got anything emergency like this, every single thing is thrown at me (or my aunt), from calling the ambulance, paying the hospital and medical bills, accompany my dad, every minor perks, Everything and Always. Once, i reach the point and i'm very angry to her, but my dad always hold me back. and now i don't even want to bother, care, or whatever to his wife again. i just care for my father.
This will temper me more and more, for anyone who searching for your love of your life, please be careful. there is still alot of woman who doesnt have any heart.
Life is hard.10 -
"Do not indent HTML files."
- From a Junior High classmate of mine who claims he is a computer wizard[this was many years ago]4 -
JuniorDev: I made some changes to your code and it seems to work better.
Me: Awesome, thanks dude.
Inner-me: Who the hell does he think he is.7 -
Manager: "yeah so thanks for understanding we can't give you a payrise, by the way we need you to train the new guy we just hired who is your senior because even though he is more experienced than you as a c# dev he doesn't understand what an object is"
Me...12 -
So sick of my colleague who keeps writing:
if (something) {
doWork();
} else {
}
He insists that it is the best code style to include the empty else clause. WRONG YOU #!*&@!15 -
so I'm married to a developer. he works at horrible boring forever projects he is trying to make me apreachiate. well fine. I can do that. sure. but for fucks sake, why on earth does a web developer need to work weekends?! and why can't he get time off? why is it even remotely important if the shop is up a today or a week later? who the fuck cares if people have to wait a week longer to buy fucking pumpkin oil online?! who buys fucking pumpkin oil online anyway?32
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I thank whoever made the jsRant, a client for devrant to view in js looking style in browser. Teacher walked passed by and asked what i was doing. I said i was exploring the source of the newest javascript framework. He said what is the name. I said semicolonJS. He asked who made it. I said some person who has fox in his name did it.
Thanks everyone! I had some laughs after he walked passed by without noticing anything.7 -
When your professor tries to tell you no one uses git in industry and you feel bad for all the other students who believe him. Side note: he is convinced everyone uses subversion.8
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And the title of hackerman goes to he who is now running macOS Sierra inside of VMWare on Windows 😂18
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Annual performance peer review
Person who did review me wrote in the section “skills needed to improve”:
“He is introverted...”
Bloody hell!! What a big problem :) and how in earth you can “fix” it? And why everyone expected to be extraverted??10 -
Some of you might have seen it already, those who didn't just have to.
One of the best rants I've read lately.
"Our security auditor is an idiot. How do I give him the information he wants?"
https://serverfault.com/questions/...4 -
So I’m working on an app with a friend who is designing it and I spent a week building a custom segment control as a menu bar. He said that it looked nice but he got inspiration to make a tab bar instead 😑
Cheers to the dev life2 -
I got this coworker who ask me about everything every day. That is fine with me, but the way he does it is not. I always use noise-cancelling headsets. Every fucking time he walks up to my desk - and just stands there. And every fucking time I randomly turn my head and freaks out. HOW LONG HAVE YOU BEEN STANDING THERE, YOU CREEPY CRETIN?!12
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The Absolutely True Story of a Real Programmer Who Never Learned C.
I have a young friend named Sam who is quite a programming prodigy. Sam does know C! I need to make this clear: he’s not the titular programmer.
But a couple years ago Sam told me a story about a different programmer who never learned C, and I liked it so much that right on the spot I asked his permission to repeat it. (I could never just steal such a tale.)
Sam wasn’t always a programmer—actually he started in his later teens, in part because he was more of a jock, and in part because he was related to programmers and wanted to do his own thing. But, like all great programmers, once he was bitten by the bug he immersed himself completely in it.
One day Sam happened to be talking programming with his uncle, who was also a programmer but from way, way back.
“Hey,” said Sam, “I’m learning this language called C. You must know a lot of languages, did you ever study C?”
“No,” said the uncle, to Sam’s surprise. “I am one of the very few programmers who never had to learn C.”
“Because I wrote it.”
Oh, Sam’s last name is Ritchie.
What I love about this story is the idea of Dennis waiting Sam’s entire life to deliver this zinger. Just imagine sitting on a line that good, watching your nephew grow up and waiting, waiting until the one day he finally starts learning to code. Did he work on the line in his head at night? Like, “Hmm, how should I word it so I can deliver the punch line perfectly? Should I say ‘I never took a class on C?’ Nah, too awkward…”
The great thing about geniuses is how much effort they put into everything.
Courtesy : Wil Shiply.5 -
DEVRANT CRASHED AND MY RANT IS GONE! I'M NOT A HAPPY MISH.
To be brief, I just remembered how my father used to smash my phone to the ground when he was angry about it.
Everytime he sees me using it. Smash!
I once made a Facebook to make more friends since I didn't have much, and still don't. (I didn't use the app btw.) He saw my search history and was furious. (My parents don't permit me to have social media. They think devRant is a school thing.)
He smashed it to the ground saying I can never use Facebook again.
He did that to 3 phones.
Fortunately, he doesn't do that anymore. Mainly because I'm the one who helps him with computer stuff and searches for the emails he needs.16 -
I'm talking with this teenager that believes himself an engineer because he built a PC.
He is vehement in telling me that Linux came out in 2007 and it was Valve who developed it for Steam!
They he Googled it to prove me wrong and then... never spoke to me again 😂
I'm an Arch user dude! That's like, just one level under Linus Torvalds!13 -
Someone who noticed that I do programming as a hobby and therefore set harder work for me in class. He also encourages my side projects and at the moment is helping me build a native app for the school :)2
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When you're working on an uni project with a fucking idiot who tests stuff with this kind of messages and then forget to remove them a few days before the deadline… fml.
I work at the frontend, he at the backend, so I shouldn't even have to check his code, but after seeing this I fucking have to.
Useless to say that he loaded these kind of placeholders also in the database.
So the admin name is "PieroGay", which is the name of the professor who will evaluate the project...
The worst thing is this bastard will graduate in 1 month, while I probably next year.28 -
Client: I saw this feature on a site and I want it on mine.
Me: I’m almost done with the project. You can’t possibly expect me to start adding new features now.
Client: Just go online and copy the code. I won’t take that long. It shouldn’t be difficult if you’re a professional.
WTF is wrong with people. The worlds gone to shit. Who does he think he is?13 -
Having a boss who thinks he is an artist, designer, programmer, manager, salesman, pr manager, devops engineer and every project lead at the same time, never trusted anyone and reassigned tasks twice a day regardless of what you were working on right now. He was also unable to explain what he wanted or to set any meaningful goals. He also told customers we/he could do everything. One time, when we never made an app before, he accepted to deliver an iOS app within 1 week. ONE WEEK. THATS FIVE DAYS.6
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I got a friend who likes to travel randomly to random places.. he now found some dudes who share this hobby.
So now there is a thing running on my server ticking everyday, 10am, with a 1:150 probability to send a sms to 7 numbers (including me) which tells them to travel to budapest.
FYI: he and his friends study engineering, i study too. So 1:150 may sound pretty low at first but we don't have that much time over the year actually.:D
Russian Roulette Travelling is a thing now.😁11 -
Who sits there so late throughout the night?
The developer it is, with his code so bright;
He holdeth the mouse tightly clasped in his hand,
He holdeth it safely, he keepth it dragging.
"Oh bug, wherefore do you seek to hide?"
"Look, developer, the sysadmin is close by our side!
Dost see not the sysadmin with his usbchain?"
"Oh dear, 'tis the blur increasing its radius."
[to be continued...] -
I met some guys who were Computer Engineering students who were studying web platform as a hobby aside from IoT lessons at school, they met me at my school's library coding stuff and I noticed one of them messing around with yum
"Is that Fedora?" I said, because I wasn't familiar what are the package managers of every distro.
"No, it's CentOS" the guy replied, he also noticed I was coding in a cloud IDE, so he was amazed. He asked if he can use C# there, can he share his workspace, etc.He also asked what's my course. I replied " i'm jsut a senior high student". And they were out of words.
after that, I always think that my skills are way ahead of my age. I don't know my brain anymore, but I felt badass3 -
Most of the tech YouTubers are really noob engineers.
Joma was a data scientist. He is an L3 engineer at Google and he hasn't done much during the last 1 year based on his internal stats.
I saw tech leads stats while he was at Google and that dude did nothing during his time. I'm sure he was an IC before he became a lead.
Clement talks about system design bull shit but he's a math major who worked on some angular front end while he was at Google. Basically his experience in tech is mostly involving using mat-button and mat-input. He also quit FB in a month.
Listening to tech lead gives me cancer. That guy was also some front end/ mobile engineer. I don't think any less of mobile engineers but tech leads acts as if he built some large scale systems at Google and FB. His opinion about react native shows how much of a noob he is. He also talked about docker in one of his video which showed he had some fundamental misunderstanding of what docker is. In his courses, he struggles to explain simple algorithms.
I don't know how these people have the courage to claim themselves as some sort of experts in the field when they are extreme noobs. They also sell some shady courses and are robbing innocent college kids.
One thing they all do well is talk. Which I give them 10/10.12 -
I know a guy who writes everything in Haskell.
He started learning it because his parents got him into a math school (and math schools in Russia use either Python or Haskell), he liked it, but later he dropped out. Today, apart from Haskell, he only really knows HTML and CSS, and maybe some JavaScript.
He writes backend AND frontend in Haskell and uses some kind of JRPC stuff to manage all that. He told me that his life is a pure heaven. He IS RELEVANT (!!!!!!), his apps always run without bugs (because in Haskell you can mathematically prove that there are no bugs), they are performant, faster than C (because you can't write a complex enough app in C that will be as efficient as compiled Haskell, because it's you vs compiler). He doesn't have any problems in life whatsoever. He never got burned out, he never got anxiety or depression. He doesn't act pretentiously and stuff, he's just a normal person who rarely even mentions that he can program.
Science says it can't be done! You can't only know Haskell and be a relevant software engineer! You know what, he didn't _know_ it was impossible. He's like that grandpa from a meme, he got Alzheimers, but because of it he forgot that he had Alzheimers, and now remembers everything.
The fun thing is that he looks like a typical gopnik, with adidas suits and stuff.
What a gem of a person.26 -
A bosses son started working with us today. Found out at 5pm I'm now expected to give him a lift to and from work each day because he doesn't drive. This is a boss who easily earns 5 times my wage and isn't offering anything in return. He doesn't even live close or on the way.7
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My favorite client just brought in a new team member who thinks he's god's gift to web development and design. Every week he gives me a long list of things he thinks are wrong with the website.
Now he's cloning pages of the site and adding hideously distorted images and excel screenshots of information matrices formatted the way he wants them. And he wants them published as he has made them because his ideas are obviously the best ones! (guess who he voted for)
He also claims that nobody can figure out how to purchase anything on the site, including him! Even after I've made it so you'd have to be frickin' Helen Keller not to be able to stumble over a BIG FAT BUY NOW BUTTON literally everywhere you look because this site is for geriatric senile MORONS who can't click their way out of a paper bag!!!5 -
just overhearing someone in my office,
he found a bug with someone's code who sits beside him,
I have now listened to him tell everyone in the team, blatantly pointing out the simple mistake he made, (parameter order)
In my mind im thinking this guy is a CUNT making himself look better,5 -
One of the owners of the company I work for is teaching programming to the lady's son who cleans the office. They are poor people but with a good heart. It is so good to know that if he takes this opportunity, he could help his family in the future. This is awesome.3
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Spend several days decoding API legacy code from the guy who got paid shitload of money and then stumble on the piece of code that shows he isn't even aware there is a count function in SQL (or rowCount in PDO)
:)))))4 -
I am building an ecommerce site and the client is asking me to hide the product prices because he doesn't want his competitors to see his prices. He also thinks it is a smart move not to allow users create an account and use it immediately. He wants to manually approve every user that signs up.
Why do people who know nothing always argue with us when it comes to our job?21 -
long && scam && rant?
At my parent's: phone rings..
Me: hi this is XYZ (in German)
He: hi this is ABC from Microsoft tecnical suport (strong Indian accent, sorry toall Indian devs who might feel offended, no intention)
Me: hi... (I'm learning for my exams and don't have a VM with Windows installed currently, so no time to "play")
He: we got some worrying data from your Windows computer. You might have a virus and we need to run a few tests to verfy it. Do you know what that is?
Me: yeah, a scam.
He: sorry, sir I didn't understand you, could you repeat?
Me: yeah, I know what " this" is. It's a scam, and we only deploy Linux here. (lie, we have Windows, Mac and Linux, as well as an iPhone, iPad and Android devices in the house, guess who is "support"...) But good luck with your next call.
He: (kind of friendly) oh. I see. Well have a nice day too.8 -
TL;DR
A "friend" is a tech fraud. Faking his resume as a software engineer! Only interested on the salary. This is unfair to all of us putting the hours of effort/practice just to improve our craft! 😠😤
I have a "friend" who is faking his resume, putting fake experiences and putting jargons not even related to tech just to make himself smart. He's using his customer service rep experience to talk confidently. His resume fcking long, 3 pages of fakery. I can't help, but to laugh when he sent it to me.
He has a tech degree, but worked in a BPO industry for 4 years, then recently, he quit. He got jealous with the lucrative software development industry and he wants to relearn coding, as a friend and I like sharing my knowledge, I agreed to guide him in the process.
After 3 moths, he got his first job, but unfortunately he got fired after two weeks because he commited sensitive data to the remote repo.
Then after a month, he got his second job and worked there for 6 months, he still don't know what his doing and always ask me solutions when he is stuck.
He got his 3rd job, remote work with high compensation. Fast forward after 3 months, he only got 1 month of salary, the other 2 wasn't given for unknown reason, my best guess is the company noticed his experience on paper does not match on real life.
Currently, he's working on another remote work with same compensation as before, and he still asks me super simple questions from time to time.
This is so unfair to all the devs who truly deserves the opportunity.20 -
Is it normal for a dad to jump into his son's decisions?
Recently he accepted a job offer that was directed to me. I got mad and asked why on earth he would do that.
He provocatively answered "Who are you to make this decision? I'm allowed to decide over you! Don't be so disrespectful towards your dad!".
If he was not my dad, I would have beaten the shit out of him.
PS: I'm still in college that's why I can't leave atm.20 -
My current boss' boss. Dude has my back, no questions asked. If I mess up, he backs me up to the customer and then teaches me the right way behind the scenes. Even stands up for me when i'm not around.
He's helped me change my lifestyle, too, connecting me with trainers and coaches who can help develop a workout plan around my one hand. He understands the value of work/life balance, but has no power to change our schedule, so he helps out however he can around that.
He is honestly #bossgoals. I want to be like him when i'm a boss2 -
Got an email...
Colleague A (who acts like he supervises me because he's here longer than than I am but he doesn't) : Webpage is broken. Please fix.
(5 minutes later)
Colleague A : Sorry I didn't pull the *other* file you committed (Yeah I know we're still on cvs...)
Another email...
Colleague B (who really is my boss) : Webpage doesn't show all records. Please fix.
(5 minutes later)
Colleague B : Sorry I forgot check page 2.
That's all my development team. Right, development, not designers, or anything.
FML...2 -
A College Friend of mine has offered last year a free C++ course for everyone who is interested, this year he is doing the same in Rust. This guy can explain and gives a big part of his freetime for this.
He is just amazing.
Thanks to everyone who shares his/her knowledge!4 -
"read the code" he said
"all the requirements and business process is in there"
Knok knok...who is there...................
VB62 -
Who is the guy who designed the AZERTY keyboards ? 😠
Seriously... Alt Gr + 5 = [
And the most horrible thing is the "(" char... WHY THE FUCK DID HE PUTS IT IN THE "5" KEY WHEN KEYBOARD IS IN LOWERCASE ? YES, IN LOWERCASE, NOT ONLY WHEN SHIFT IS HOLD.
There are more than 100 keys in a keyboard, so why here? WHY?
Half of time I check if CapsLock is off just to be sure if I can open a bracket just because someone thought it was a good idea to put it here. It annoys me.13 -
Not my own bug, but at our sister company there is a PHP developer who almost gets fired twice a year, once when the clocks go forward and once when they go back again. He can't program dates well, or use stack overflow apparently.3
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When my idiot technical lead on the client’s floor (where everyone could hear him), “corrected” me in public telling me I should never use parent/child classes and override a method. Instead just use lots of if else statements in the one.
Not just is he a moron, but sounds like he knows what he is talking about if you are a client who knows nothing about coding. So I look like an idiot to our customers and he sounds smart... when it’s the other way around.
And HOW DARE you criticize anyone, even if it is warranted, in public in front of clients. You go in an office and close a door.6 -
TLDR: Skills and background or dedication for becoming a good programmer?
So I almost finished the bootcamp on my company, there is only 2 people. Me and another guy who is from math major. He wanted to learn programming so he applied for the job. He doen’t know sql, any backend language, and not even html or css when he joined. The only thing he knew is for looping and if condition logic. He survived 1 months or so by learning a lot here. C#, .net mvc, sql, decent css and html. I believe he worked hard by learning it by himself. But the company he can’t continue anymore. I doesn’t know the reason but probably because he is seen as not good enough. Sure he is kinda slow when adding some feature to our small project but we need to find how to do it by ourself mostly. Now I’m alone with another few weeks to continue4 -
A friend of mine (who is French) has made a little firewall for Windows (idk why).
He sends me the binary, so I tested it and got around it fairly easily.
Replied to him: "I have a nice name for it: Maginot line" -
Usually when you ask "I have a problem with service X, who wrote it?".
The answer is "Y wrote it but he left the company XYZ years ago".
In company I currently work the the answer is "Oh yes X wrote it 20 years ago, go ask him"11 -
People who know basics of HTML, CSS and start searching for the web developer Jobs are the same people who buys a pencil and assumes that he is an artist 😀12
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Java : He is the topper who is usually mocked, but still everyone seeks his help on the day before exams. He tops the class no matter where he is.
C : He was once the coolest guy in the class with all the new gadgets but now uses outdated gadgets.
C++ : The guy who comes 2nd and is also loved by everyone. He is very competitive.
R : She has everything readymade from food to tiffins.
JavaScript: Tries to be in the cool gang but she is someone to whom nobody talks.
CSS: The most beautiful girl in the class and a make-up expert. Also the only friend of JavaScript.
Python: She will soon top the class.
C# : Is she still part of the class!!?24 -
HR guy who was telling me that his company is one of the best when he was ofdering me a job, joined different startup after a month.3
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Newly hired developer who calls himself ”senior” on linkedin has not contributed for 6 months. At least. I have been very helpful on many pair programming sessions. Directing him. Being extremely precise how things works and are working together. Small and big picture. He calls me and ask questions and I answer. Explain. Again and again. But it does not stick.
Nothing.
Extremely precise tasks. Written specifically for him.
Nothing.
He has like 10 commits in one year. It’s the worst I’ve seen in a developer role.
The other day in a zoom meeting he failed to declare a variable correctly. He copy/pasted a line instead and renamed the variable.
I saw this early. But I need not to work with him for a long time. It is now very clear that he will never contribute but in fact decrease the velocity of the team.
One year is a long time.
He is stupid. He can’t learn. Did he not tell the truth about himself when management hired him?
It so sad they hired him.13 -
Once a month I get a crash for the stupid PHP site I am in charge of because the guy who made the database made the primary key of a table a varchar. It is a number 99.9% of the time but the dumbass customer always enters one entry with a string cuz the dumbass db Dev let them. I emailed the dumbass Dev telling him he is stupid and he said it is part of their philosophy. I told him I still think he is stupid so he emailed my boss.
I emailed him again telling him he is stupid.6 -
My dev role model is my senior who taught me JavaScript when I was a noob. He was so cool. One of the few real programmers who enjoy their work in a clusterfuck world of idiots who pretend for money.
His philosophy sticks with me even today. I was new to the industry and the long hours of low pay intern work were getting to me. But he kept reminding me that programming still has this cool, engineering side where you blitz stuff out on a keyboard and build awesome shit.
I owe him my career because without him I'd still be one of the other stooges who bitch about the job and avoid studying. But since working with him, I never speak bad about my profession. Programming is a beautiful profession, even if the people I work with are sometimes dumbfuck dicks. And he taught me that distinction.2 -
This is what being a security enthusiast does to you.
A little background : This is our team's designer who asked me to send him one of my pictures to put on my ID Card (that he is designing) for the event that I'm organizing along with my team. I have known him for about 2 years now but well, security awareness gave me trust issues because I apparently asked him to delete the picture he is finally using for my ID Card after he is done with the work. He must be thinking I'm crazy.
P.s. I still don't know if he actually deleted it or not but let's just give him the benefit of doubt and try to live in oblivion.19 -
Today I am going to rant about this guy who I am working with in a group for creating a mobile application as a project for a course.
So let me give you some background info about this guy. He has 5 years of experience as data analyst from some company in India. Now he is here in Canada for his masters. I took him in the group thinking given his experience, he can be an asset. However, as I started talking to him it became clear that he has no experience with programming or software development. I am ok with that as everyone is new to something. However, he started intrupting and started giving negative feedback about each and every thing we discussed regarding the project. Don't get me wrong, I am all about getting feesback. But if someone who is just sitting there and just searching stuff on google just to bull shit with people to show that he knows stuff is irritating. He always provide useless feedback and solutions to any problems.
I was talking to him about his past working experience and his future plans after graduating. He literally said, "I want to learn just enough to fake in front of employer during interview. I was doing the same thing in my previous job." I was legit shocked at this moment.
Now I have to tolerate this for another 3 months. I am just worried about the project.7 -
A guy who was supposedly my teacher , out of 3 hours every class wasted 2.5 hours talking and watching videos on YouTube, it was impossible that I depended on him to learn the web , if I had I would not be on Devrant today.
That shithead who is supposed the best spent a whole year teaching me less but sending me templates and links to study at home. The fact is I had already visited most of the content and was way more ahead in time than him. This dumbfuck was one of those morons who wasted my time more than his. His way of teaching included sending content and not really putting the effort to touch the details. For everything he used w3schools.
Now when I submitted projects and had developed them on material design, he said it's mediocre , you know why ?
Because apparently this moron likes to do everything custom and he doesn't like simple design. He wants 15 types of animations and movements on the screen for branded websites. And I am fucking sure has no idea about the importance of material design.
Arrogant dumbfuck is understatement. He needs to be fucked by a peacock to understand what simplicity is.26 -
I spent the last 3 months trying to hire new developers for my team. I found someone experienced who is great and a graduate, who is, well, a graduate.
For some reason he thinks he knows everything about our framework he has never used and seems to think he knows how everything works in our codebase which he has never seen.
That’s fine. I’ve had my share of cocky developers.
But what confuses me is that when I ask him what critical bugs are left, he reels off two significant ones. I ask what it will take to fix it. Of course he says he knows how to fix it. So I say great. Then fix it and let’s move on to a more fun part of our project.
Suddenly he didn’t know where he problem was and so I told him he had to investigate and come back with something concrete.
It’s just frustrating managing this developer who is deceitful.10 -
CEO at work has a Mac elitist as a friend who somehow indoctrinated err I mean convinced him to get apple everywhere, now the most common issue is updating Microsoft products on the Mac.....
Mac elitist guys first name is Steve lol no lie, he also services the Macs which he expects to do so when no one is around, oh and did I mention he wants us to leave our passwords on our desks LOL, he doesn't work for the company and I really really don't trust him, glad I have a git repo, and I hope he doesn't delete anything on my PC (very reluctant to leave my password on my desk, so I may just convince everyone that my Mac is fine, which seems like it's doing it's thing)3 -
We all have that one friend who says that he is a computer genius because he built his PC himself but then he doesn't know the difference between bits and bytes.9
-
I'm taking an entrepreneurship course and there is this one guy who talks empty words just to impress others.
He uses linux and at every single course he opens the terminal just to run the commands "sudo apt update" and "sudo apt remove", the rest of the time he is on discord.
He always switches to the terminal so you can see what an 'expert' he is17 -
I managed to get a new dell XPS 15 with uhd display, 16GB RAM and a nice i7 for work.
My boss previously asked for advice from me for which laptop to get, he ignored my advice which was for him to get a nice surface book pro for his excel activities
Instead he got a shitty Mac book air (who are these people who like the airs?). As his cto I was upset he didn’t trust his tech guy to choose him a powerful laptop that was useful.
Anyway, he saw my new laptop this week and a contractor was admiring it. My boss then said why didn’t you tell me to get this one? (The surface pro is the same spec but with tablet and pen ability).
What a dick. I’m still mad he didn’t listen to me. And now he is saying I never told him.
Macs are shit btw. This dell is great and I don’t know how we lived without uhd screens before.14 -
This is a rant about that guy who is younger, more talented, smarter, more handsome and a super wizard in everything he does.. and still manages to be a nice guy.
Fuck you. It's unfair3 -
This greek-speaking fucker (who wasn't Greek, he just spoke the language) went full bitch mode when he found out I recommended against giving him a promotion.
While screaming for an hour he called me "ornitophagos", or something that sounded like it.
I'm not quite sure that "chicken eater" is an insult, but it surely seemed like one. Maybe it was some weird attempt at hinduphobia, dunno, I just changed my recommendation to "sack the fucker".8 -
I have this guy who always post on his social media stories about how he is so good at programming and he has mastered “python” “R” and “JavaScript”. He just started programming early this year. February to be precise and thinks he is a badass programmer. Smh
How will I tell him codeacamy free certificates isn't knowing about programming and cramming syntax isn't programming also🤦🏽♂️13 -
Not a coworker, but this guy who I went to uni with and was a real life saver when I was really down. (we played minecraft together)
... So, he is a real genius. One of those guys who I legit couldn't keep up with. His brain works, he doesn't bullshit his way through, he's not pretentious, he is legit a down to earth rare genius. Yet, he doesn't use his talents enough, he likes to work or go home to play minecraft. And he doesn't politically care enough, so I am almost sure that he will end up getting stuck in the defence force.
We're still friends. And I try my hardest to not be nosy and nag at him that he can do better. I mean, he is happy the way he is, and he is not ambitious. But the memory of him is a reminder that not everyone who gets somewhere is the best and brightest.36 -
I know a developer who works for a Mortgage Company, and he is dangerously incompetent. He used to work for my boss before I did and we both told his new boss how unqualified he is, but because he's able to get things "done" they think he does a good job. But I've been in the code and their entire system could any day just completely Fall Apart and they could be in a lot of trouble and we tell them this and they don't listen to us.5
-
The moment I told my client that I can't do the ewallet project for RM 30 which is so underpriced.
He call his son who is a lawyer to sue me for the blablabla....
.......3 -
This is how beautiful corporate is -
I talked to my cousin recently who works in an MNC. He told me about a team member who was assigned a Google Login integration task on the website. They already had a username/password combo working.
That team member took 2 months for it. Every week on the team wide meeting he took an off day and kept saying he was 'stuck' on the task and he's figuring it out.
2 months later, he completed the task and got compliments from the manager that he 'worked day and night' and overcame his struggles. Then he got a week off for his 'efforts'.
Just kill me at this point.2 -
IT Definitions of Designations
Project Manager is a Person who thinks nine women can deliver a baby in One month.
Developer is a Person who thinks it will take 18 months to deliver a Baby.
Onsite Coordinator is one who thinks single woman can deliver nine babies in one month.
Client is the one who doesn't know why he wants a baby.
Marketing Manager is a person who thinks he can deliver a baby even if no man and woman are available.
Resource Optimization Team thinks they don't need a man or woman; they'll produce a child with zero resources.
Documentation Team thinks they don't care whether the child is delivered, they'll just document 9 months.
Quality Auditor is the person who is never happy with a delivered baby.
Tester is a person who always tells that this is not the Right baby.
HR Manager is a person who thinks that...a Donkey can deliver a Human Baby - if given 9 Months -
We have a new manager who wrote in his bio that he is into astrology.
At least we will no longer have to answer to "How long will it take?", because it is written in the stars XD3 -
Some folks I cannot remember keep popping up with their 'i am back' posts and make me wonder: "should I know this lad? Was he here before me? Was he posting so little quality content that I didn't even notice him? Will I offend that person by saying idk who he is? Should I really care...?6
-
I had to think as I've been asked quite a few dumb questions but my favorite was a friend who asked about cloud storage and how they got it up there as he is pointing to the sky. It made me think of this commercial.2
-
A project manager is someone who believes that if he/she joins 9 pregnant women they'll have a child in 1 month1
-
So here is what happens. I have new guy in the office. He thinks he is a big shot or something. Our office time is 9 to 6, but no one comes in at that time.
This guy, he comes at 10:30 and I come at 11. I have been working as a senior dev for 2.5 years now and he is a fresher who joined as a manager which I am still wondering why.
And he tells me you are late and I inform the CEO about this.
One of these days I will tell him that brother the day you show the same commitment I have shown to the company or anything close to it, we will talk.
Waiting for the exact day.5 -
I created our login system to be secure and reliable.
One coworker hardcoded the roles a person who is logging in receives and built a backend to just assign roles you want. He pushed this to prod...
Yeah...2 -
so my father is on psychiatry, because he tried to kill himself. he invited me to join, which was very tempting, but his method was very stupid, and i have a bit more time of enjoying watching the apocalypse in progress, so i declined.
he's alive, because his attempt was thwarted by his instinct not to take anyone else with him who didn't consent.
i told him killing himself by crashing a car is the stupidest way ever.
i'm glad he didn't listen, because i was right.16 -
So I read this morning about some web teacher. Here is my story:
In high school I had a teacher who was "THE GOTO WEB GUY", at least that was what other theachers thought. Here is what reallity looked liked in a lesson of his:
He comes up with some ancient example he just found on some tutorials page and he just remembered bits of how to do it. So when he got stuck he fired up a google search. When a student had a question he fired up a google search. Because he didn't know shit. Of course you cannot know everything but he was so cocky about his skills that it really annoyed me. Best part? He sold web sites (joomla) where his greates achievment was to change the color of the template. Everything he teached in that semester had I already learned through selfteaching and tutorials in an evening. -
So I was looking for restaurants and this is the website of one in my area. Not sure if minimalistic design or just writen html in text editor. Maybe he hired a dev who took "will only take 30min" too seriously.4
-
Today in a meeting, a non-dev analyst who frequently uses SQL mentioned in passing that he uses Excel as a text editor for his SQL code. I don't know what he said after that because I wasn't able to get past the fact that Excel is his go to text editor.6
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I wrote an application to demo at a convention coming up. Which feeds tcp data from arduino devices to real time d3 maps via websockets.
Demoing today, and the owner starts talking about a project he saw that which lit up some lights to a device in the room via the internet. In this same meeting he casually mentions he wish he had developers who could do that type of stuff.
The disconnect is massive and soul breaking. -
I literally just had a conversation with my coworker who is not a dev where he said that WordPress sites getting hacked is a myth. He also thinks shared hosting sites getting hacked is also a myth......I literally can't right now.4
-
This is an old friend of mine, who recently joined the company I work with, 6 months back. And this is what he pinged me with yesterday.
This should be considered harassment at workplace, and trigger social, psychological, emotional, physical and all other sort of distancing.8 -
So today a client requested that the domain name in the address bar should be all capital letters because of corporate design. Don't get me wrong, this is a valid request for someone who has no experience in the IT world. But he refused to believe me that it wasn't possible. He even claimed that he has seen it at least hundred times and called me incapable. I don't get clients.1
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I have a disgusting corporate wanna be manager in my company and i fucking want him to die.
He thinks he owns the company... by just the way he walks.. u could tell he believes everyone around him to be his underling.
hes not actually good in anything but he is amazing at posting about how we need more descipline in the company every now and then. most employees here are workaholics who love their jobs too much and stay more than needed and yet he likes to remind them they need to be *desciplined* enough to be here at 10 sharp. (most are 15 to 30 mins late but everyone stays hours extra voluntarily...).
i wish he'd stop thinking he is qualified to micro manage nor is he supposed to. some of the people (not even including myself) that he is calling undesciplined are literally the reason he still has a job because of the weekends and all nighters they voluntarily put in.
Rot in hell u micro managing corporate wanna be asshole...
Rot in hell2 -
Me: "hey we should do this new project in react!"
Boss: "no he barrier to entry is to tough for our team"
Boss talks to past employee(which he had to let go because he was a TERRIBLE developer who now works for facebook....) about new project, past employee recommends react....
Team is now going to work on a new project written with react......1 -
Our HR guy is a tool. He requested I help him extract some data from our database. Which based on what he requested I supplied he then started trying to bully me because the data I gave him wasn’t what he wanted. Ringing me every 5 mins asking if it was ready, comparing me to another colleague who wrote the system.
When we blew up at him telling him to back off he continued. Anyway he still works here and persists in being a tool. i on the other hand ignore him.
I’m pretty sure that the HR bullying an employee is wrong, not massively worried about it just annoyed6 -
I have a friend who likes to change his tech stack every time he reads about a new technology online.....He started working on a startup idea of his.....He started with Larvel.....then came NodeJS...Then came .Net Core......Then Go.....And yesterday he told me that he is thinking about making it in Vapour.
Him: how long do you think it will take me
Me: ........Forever4 -
I don't like noob techies who are into IT for the money.
My friend is jealous of me and he wants to get to my level. I told him that he should take Oracle certifications if he wants a good chance to a raise or a promotion (at least, it's a well-respected series of certs and everyone I know who took them got serious salary increases and respect from their managers).
For example, I studied for 12 weeks, for 12 hours per day for the OCA. He thinks he can just quickly cram a cert in three days and get big money. Nope.
This guy failed Network+ countless times. I remember he wanted to quickly get his CCNA when he barely understands how folders work.
The level of foolishness is amazing..
Yeah, anyway..15 -
Somewhere there is a developer who writing an AI code that will put most ppl out of work. And he doesn't even know it2
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Ffs, I've finally finished a project where I worked with a guy who was the laziest coder I have ever worked with.
He didn't even try to come up with meaningful variable names😒.
Instead of naming a variable label1 (which is already kinda s***) he tried lbl1 but still made a typo so the actual name was ibl1.
AND HE LEFT IT LIKE THAT FOR THE REST OF THE PROGRAM!4 -
Idk if anyone outside of the US knows who Dr. Phil is, but for those who do, he recently did a concert on one of the late night shows. Linked for reference:
https://youtu.be/7uUjVW6NytQ4 -
So I am assigned to a new team to take over the leading position because the guy who did it up till now quit. And there is this guy who today seriously shared his screen with my boss and the rest of the team to point out that I formatted something wrong...
Realy it was something like
super.doFunctionA().thenFunctionB() instead of putting it like
super
.functionA()
.functionB()
He said he wanted to call me out early to avoid spreading of this "wrong formatting"
He wants to start a war? This fuckhead can have it!
Soon I will be the one who writes his tasks... hf8 -
I'm the kind of dev who is willing to overtime because I enjoy coding. But my previous boss (owner) abused this opportunity and thinks he can call me whenever he wants. After my shift, he would be surprise if I go home immediately and ask If I will be working at home. He even called me while I'm in vacation (he wants me to work on a new feature). I already filed my leave 3mos before that. He is very manipulative to the other devs and doesn't even trust his managers.3
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U know this guy, whos Shady AS FUCK..
He waited until the end of the daily(when noone was putting attention) to make an agreement with the PO about some decisions of the user history..
He doesnt even know WTF is doing, so he wanted to swap his user history for another one..
U & ALL THE PEOPLE WHO NEVER WORK WITH THE TEAM & USE PRIVATES CHATS TO CONTROL OTHERS!
FUCK U!!3 -
Fresh internship story (Part 2)
I just realized how dumb my temporary boss really is and how much he loves to command everyone.
I told him that I am going earlier a few days ago and he got pissed lol.
He is someone who thinks he knows everything, but he does not.
He blames everything on everyone else.
He is never wrong, we are always wrong. That is probably what he is always thinking.
Clients who enter the store are precious (makes sense-you have to handle clients well, to get more bucks), but the thing is that he even screams near the clients at us. Besides of that I am new there. Be a little bit more patient, fucking prick.
Imho he is too old for the tech industry.
He loves to use the workers as slaves.
Do you work on a laptop rn? Well... fuck that. He has a new task waiting for you.
He keeps interrupting me every 5 to 10 minutes while I am focused.
Random dialogue from today:
me:"the client did a win10 upgrade and not a regular windows update"
boss:"nope. that is a windows update."
me (internally): should I show him the folder called "Windows10.Upgrade" and the "windows.old" folder both with the same creation date in "c:"? nah, fuck that. he is gonna put himself up again. do not want to have a stronger headache than this one I am having rn. (btw. I usually do not have headaches. I get headaches like once in 5 years, but since 4 days I have it every day.)
I am sick of this.
Today I had the urge to fucking grab his fucking "fuck me please" eyes out and eat them while he hears the explosive sounds his seperated eyes do. I still want to enjoy the rest of my life without going into a prison tho.12 -
There is this around 50 yo guy who seriously said in a room full of linuxers "oh, I'm already over with that Linux thing, it's for children. I'm using Windows now."
The sad thing is: he meant it seriously.3 -
I think there is always that guy in the company who makes shitty code, and someone else needs to fix/rewrite it. but he is always good with PM and superiors.
-
What was the most stupid thing interview ever do to you?
My side of story. He (interviewer, also a developer) try to convince me that JavaScript and Java are the same thing. Which we all know that is not...
He said "I can't hire someone who don't know basic of computer science , this is basic that JavaScript is from Java"
(Isn't ecmascript or something?)
Saying JavaScript is From Java is a wrong statement. There are differences between having a DICK and Being a DICK.5 -
For those who have seen me ranting about ending up in a bad team.....
Few days back I was emotionally and mentally affected to a level I couldn't handle anymore. I spoke to my manager (our team got a new manager who is sensible and serious) and asked for team change and he said it was possible but he would need some time. 🙂1 -
This is interesting coming from the man who build the biggest IP conglomerate in the world. A man who actively tried to kill open source. Looks like he got into his senses at his old age. Although, he is talking about AI models only, not software as a whole.
Yes ML/AI models are software.2 -
Very off topic but I had to vent somewhere.
My brother is a dick to everyone (except to people who can give him promotions) and especially to the family.
He bragged about being aggressive in his workplace for years to his peers and to people 'under' him.
Now he insulted the wrong person and got fired.
Is it bad that this made me happy, seeing justice served to him?3 -
Recruiter calls to my open office job, asks for me.
Coworker: hey Such N. Such is on the phone for you.
Me: idk who he is, tell him to leave a message.
Coworker: ok. He says to please call him back about an amazing dev position @ XYZ.
Savage2 -
the guy won't reply messages, he won't do his job and everyone who depends on him is punished for his behavior. he's hanging by a thread but also no one know how to do his job because it was not documented2
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Rant on anti devs.
I helped my friend crack a fairly simple hackerank. The questionnaire was basic JavaScript questions and little on CSS selectors nth child. The test is finished in half hour instead of 75 mins.
5 months later. He calls again and ask if he can get the question solutions (code snippets). I didn't have those but curious why he needed it. He says he wants to put that solutions to Github. So would look on resume. This is not even a project just code snippet with a for loop. He just wants any codebase to upload to his profile.
My ears are bleeding. It makes me sad that some people had to do Masters in computer science purely out of societal pressure. Just because software development is booming field a lot of folks who are not genuinely interested in development are being forced into the industry.6 -
I have a mate who downloaded encryption software that he somehow managed to use to encrypt almost every system file in windows, now the entire thing is fucked, like how can anyone be that stupid? Like before he even did that he tried encrypting the .exe of the encryption software and guess how that went6
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...He hired a shit dev who did the same work in 3 times less than what I asked for.
He's now back crying to fix his Fuck up.
You ask how I know he is shit. He SSH-ed into the server. Worked directly off the production files. Worst of all, he installed phpmyadmin, changed the db structure without even writing a fucking migration !!!
How the hell am I supposed to know what he changed!! It's gonna be a long night 😥5 -
There is a junior who worked at 12am. I said to him not to overwork if he has lots of todo's. Agree?14
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Currently rebuilding a web store backend originally developed in 5.2 and by an Indian guy who loved his spaghetti and his knowledge of version control is to do things like 'index.php, index1.php, index-old.php'. Even on the DB he does this... God damn9
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In my school there is this guy, who talks a lot and fools the teachers into thinking that he is a dev savvy so he gets assigned to projects with us, but he can't even write a function in js, and talks about accessing a DB with jQuery. Talk is cheap show me the code5
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You have a meeting with a really really important client who is a typical client from hell who constantly changes his mind about everything and then blames you for “not getting things done” and always says “this is not what I asked for” every god damn time.
Anyway, he now jokingly asks you if you think he has been a troublesome client and before you have time to answer he continues the meeting.
What do you do? Do you suck it up like a weakling and disappear up your own asshole or do you tell him what a monster he is?5 -
!rant
Who in their right mind puts an id on the head tag.
Css? Don't need it.
JavaScript ? Can directly access it anyway
It fucking breaks old browsers your not even giving them a chance to look at least average !
This is for a huge site as well that he got to work on because he is related to the owner .. he's an arrogant prick as well ... Don't know shit bout programming anything4 -
Absolutely the best quote from Tao Of Programming...
A novice asked the Master: "Here is a programmer that never designs, documents or tests his programs. Yet all who know him consider him one of the best programmers in the world. Why is this?"
The Master replied: "That programmer has mastered the Tao. He has gone beyond the need for design; he does not become angry when the system crashes, but accepts the universe without concern. He has gone beyond the need for documentation; he no longer cares if anyone else sees his code. He has gone beyond the need for testing; each of his programs are perfect within themselves, serene and elegant, their purpose self-evident. Truly, he has entered the mystery of Tao."1 -
So I recently returned from university and was catching up with people. Then this guy(childhood friend) who is in EE was "asking" me about how my academics were going. So I was describing my cs classes to him until he suddenly interrupted me saying he knows "how algorithms work" and also that IT == CS. I tried my best to explain to him that it is not the same thing, but his ego just couldn't allow me to talk. He continued on forcefully about how he did a project in java that used SQL and blahblahblah. After he was done exhibiting himself, he asked me what languages do you know(LOL)? When I tried to explain to him that cs is not about learning languages, the guy proceeded to interrupt me again and tell me how his curriculum is hard so as to imply that mine is shit. Finally, this human waste told me to "open java" so that he could code, I opened up my terminal, which he responded to by asking me "What is that?"2
-
did all the work and showed it to client . a person came and did just formating/ui , even values were populated by me .
Now he is the one who did everything. even client appreciated his effort of 4 hours.
Fuck this company.2 -
Bjarne Stroustrup is someone I enjoy reading about, is still alive, is relatable, has done something significant, has healthy introspection, and his quotes look like shit people post on devrant:
https://en.wikiquote.org/wiki/...
He also knows how to write a language reference that is fun to read. Who does that shit?1 -
I just wrote this code, let's see if the dude who is going to work with it after me will rant about checking state right after setting it as null.
I wonder if he will know why I did this ...30 -
I don't know how to feel about it. What story it tells? Python is so easy that even vandals use it or maybe someone bleed on the wall how much she/he hates python. Or maybe it is scream of inner Vandal closed in cubicle who works with AI and blockchain for life's. What is the story behind this?6
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I legit had an interview once where he said
"Ok next question. Static variables...are they good or are they bad"
The funny thing is I can totally relate to working with someone who thinks static variables are bad but it's sad to see this is how far we have fallen.7 -
What is it with devs (not all, by any means!) who don't understand networks or basic computer operation? I'm not talking about anything complex, but things like the dev who asked if his IP address could be whitelisted so he could remote in from home. We asked what his public IP address is and he said 10.0.0.27.
Or the new dev who started and said her laptop camera didn't work and logged a ticket, only to be asked if she had the camera cover open or closed and said, "oh, that's what that lever is for."
Don't get me wrong - many devs and sysadmins and IT people of all fields are excellent. And there are some who are crap in every field. This is no rant about devs in general, just *these* crap devs that I can only throw my hands in the air and think, well, they scored ok in the SQL test.4 -
We need a new Website for our school TV club. Ok..
I start to make a idea of site and give it to the guy, who said that we need a new site.
He liked the idea.
I started to make site.
*Few hours later*
The site is "ready" (Not fancy af but operates)
I go to the guy who want the site.
He said: "Why do you make the site? I setuped Wordpress for our site."
Fuck you.1 -
People who tell me they hate PHP, though when I ask said person whether he's used PHP all he can answer is "maybe once".
Don't hate on a language if you have barely even used it3 -
Not a co-worker but a personal friend, I am still developing with the dude. He is absolutely AMAZING when it comes to reverse engineering he knows much more than me in this area of computer science. Actually one of my first friends who actually geeks out over this shit.10
-
I have a flatmate who has a different way of specifying how a girl looks . He calls a thin girl 'thin' and someone obese as 'healthy'.
' That thin girl is cute'
' Did you see Sharon, she's so healthy'7 -
A genuine request to everyone who loves devRant.Our very own @chaosesqueteam and his team of a bazillion bots is begging for our help. Please give him some deserving reviews for all the hardwork he has done here on his beloved project so more people are aware what kind of work he does.
https://sourceforge.net/projects/...85 -
I'm the only one who after saying "nah, come on, I will backup it tomorrow, what could happen?", spends the day after by reinstalling Windows (after an awesome crash) and praying that the project he was working on for months is still there?1
-
I'm so done with all the covid talk.
Its all that's ever talked about and you don't get a break.
As if it wasn't bad enough to have that one friend who constantly has to remind everyone how politically educated he is, and how much he hates the neo[whatever the fuck], now he has to remind everyone about his opinions on the vaccine.
No one fucking asked, shut the fuck up.
Your opinions do not matter.1 -
isRant = true
Am I the only one who has to deal with an annoying coworker who has the urge to take every conversation into an argument to prove himself smarter than everyone in the team? A person who has to contradict every time with rest of the people just to prove himself smarter and different.
Gets so annoying sometimes that I stop answering him right away.
To add to this he is the person from our dev team who has to prove that he codes the fastest and want to get it deployed ASAP. Does not follows best practices and disregards and design patterns. Would argue for hours on his code with the peer reviewer.
Every one hates him for this and he things he is the dev rockstar2 -
I have this coworker who praises himself or being vegan an caring a lot about the world and his health, but smokes and drinks quite a lot. He also is very friendly with everyone but then he privately complains about them with me and goes back to be friendly.
I could ignored this behavior until it started affecting me. Now he is just passive aggressive with everyone, including me. The kind of guy who sends a slightly bitter comment with a wink at the end almost everyday. The kind of guy who will talk to you non-stop like he is your best friend and next morning don't even look at you. The one who will try to teach you some lesson whenever you say something publicly (which he did tons of times and ended up fucking up because he had no idea what he was talking about).
I feel like ignoring him from now on no matter what he says, because he is only waiting for the perfect opportunity to make you feel like a not caring human being so he can keep standing out and controlling everyone. Yes, if you ever try to organize something, he will make sure to criticize you.
So... that's it.2 -
I work as an intern in a big company. There is a person who joined the company recently with about 6 years of experience in other big companies. He can't do simple things like adjusting his computers resolution and raised a request for a new monitor. He used to wonder why his request was denied 😐 later when I got to know this had happened, I went and fixed the resolution, he was so fascinated.. Hmm...1
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my teacher genuinely asked the class, which one is better GUI or CLI? everyone said GUI except me, he asked why? (the reason he was expecting from me was something different) i said, "CLI differentiate us from those who just click and realise that how simple is this to operate and why are we being heavily paid?"1
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Let he who is without sin static_cast<Projectile>(firstStone);
I’m not gonna pretend I’ve never forgotten about a small placeholder in my UI, but do I win something for finding this?3 -
Having a director who only got his position because the industry is so young and he was able to register domain names so seen as an expert by non-technical people. As few people do this role where I live he was able to move from role to role and rise up the ranks. Everyone in the company knows he's useless except a couple of older directors who are scared of technology so think he's knowledgeable.
He has no ability to plan, everything he says to clients is 'yes, asap' without getting proper requirements, then pulls the devs off one project mid progress to work on another. He also needs basic concepts explained to him many, many times. When pitching for work I end up writing most of his stuff for him and he also starts with the previous version of a document that I have proof read and corrected about ten times.
The frustrating part is I only have to deal with him due to a merger of two companies.1 -
These are the programmers who I had encountered and detest intensely:
1. Programmers who addicted to take other programmers' failure as an achievement.
2. Programmers who are overly arrogant. (Hey just because you know something , that don't make you a God)
3. Programmers who stealing my code without crediting me, and yet he got paid.
4. Programmers who discourage new developers.
5. Programmers who can't take criticism (Once I told a dev that his code is not clean as he decided to name the variable like __fuckingFuckingFuckningVar = "Fuck"; , he yelled at me that i am a MF. Which it's completely childish in my opinion, as a software engineer, I think programme a clean code for easy maintain and understandable for others, it is a responsibility.)
6. Programmers who compare me with others.
7. Programmers who are not friendly. (Don't be like Stackoverflow).13 -
Who else is loving the twitter dumpster fire? He threatens to fire the devs if they don't roll out the verified account to anyone willing to pay.
The shipped that bomb just like you demanded assface.15 -
My boss was gossiping about all the staffs except me and the other person who was listening to him. I was coding and not part of the conversation.
What do you guys think, is he fit to be a boss and a leader?5 -
A subservient idiot of my CEO who thinks he is my boss has asked me to document our daily standup meetings.
Today I put together all the reasons this is a waste of time in my head: nobody reads these, if you read them once every 2 weeks what's the point of writing these everyday, you don't understand what we do, this takes time away from us actually accomplishing shit.
He was out for kidney stones today. He is in immense pain, but I cannot lay the logical smackdown I had prepared upon him.
Bittersweet -
There is a colleague of mine who is loud, arrogant and thinks he knows it all. Except when I worked closely with him turned out he doesn't know shit. And he has been in the industry for over a decade! Why the fuck was he hired, I don't know..
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Slogging through half baked code, I wondered to myself... Who the fuck is Robert and where is he?
Quickly searching through Google and finding a handful of results I see that he had left long ago. Probably leaving for good reason. I'll never be able to ask him though. Never will I know why he left. He probably has a very sensible reason, but goddamn do I wish he left something that I could use to discern what he has created.
There is no documentation, no reasonable information about why anything was built the way it was, only just mountains of rusty ass baren code to scale down.5 -
Fuck my project manager. He wants to sacrifice code quality, test coverage and technical debt in favor of more features. In the future when everything takes longer or breaks guess who is responsible? Certainly not him.3
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Had an odd bug today. No rubber duck in sight so I started using my friend (who is not a dev) as a rubber duck. He was *not* amused.
But I did figure out the bug!! -
Hi, this is my first rant!
I started working side by side on an AngularJS project with a javascript developer who has been with the company for almost two years now.
Today our Product Owner reported that he couldn't continue with his conformity tests because there were some blocking errors. Looking at the controller's code of the page he reported with errors I found this debugging nightmare4 -
Noop
18k+ upvotes.
Not a single post.
He's the total inversion of a narcissist. Hes a ghost.
He must be the most boring person on earth or the most interesting/mysterious.
Like, what is he hiding? No posts, no comments. Just upvotes.
My bet: Hes an international fugitive or a spy. Get em!
Who else wants to baselessly speculate about long time users who keep to themselves and or highlight their favorite mime?11 -
Shower thoughts: Someone should infiltrate the NSA and create a backdoor. Then, with all the data NSA has, he could make the most efficient and successful dating service, which doesn't even need any rightleftmitchmatchbullshit, because it instantly knows who the perfect one is.1
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"we need to reduce the amount of meetings" said the super-duper senior enterprise manager who invited me to 20 meetings for the next 2 weeks.
To be honest, I haven't figured out yet what he is actually doing 💅2 -
!rant !dev Still funny office story
This happened last november. I decorated my desk for halloween (plastic bats, vampire stickers, more bats, a plastic raven, a little skeleton, etc). I also put a photo of Chris Pohl (vocalist from Blutengel, a electro-goth band).
I decided to remove all the decorations except for the raven and the Chris Pohl‘s photo.
One day, a partner and I were cheking out the code, and she suddenly saw that photo.
She: Oh, who is he? is he your boss?
Me: What?
S: Yes, is he your direct boss?
M: No, you‘re my boss
S: No, no, is he the vampire who you report your activities with?
M: Oh! XD No, it‘s Chris Pohl, Blutengel‘s vocalist
S: Mmm... he‘s pretty weird... his eyes...
and then, she got back to her desk.
That‘s it, continue reading rant stories 😅
P.D. What‘s the weirdest thing you have on your desk? 🤔7 -
Not my rant, but look
http://tonsky.me/blog/...
Makes me question my career, but he is right.
We need to build our products on better foundations. But who builds the better foundations ?5 -
Taking over development of a system from some other guy who just straight up dropped it with zero documentation. The code looks like he wrote it after watching some getting started tutorial. There is no structure. Some methods and statements are just empty. And he spelt 'connection' three different ways in the same file.
God help me...1 -
More rants coming up.
1st
Working with a guy who I am not sure has the necessary experience to begin with.
The person who hired him told me to teach the guy for him to catch up to our project and its pace. He has some experience with Java. Which our project is being developed in java in a linux dev environment in a full stack way. So we handle front to infrastructure.
First day working with him and I saw this guy is trouble.
1st - doesn’t know effing git commands. Who doesn’t know git nowadays. Ok i can forgive him for that. But damn this guy’s learning curve is so slow. After s month of joining, he still has to look up the commands in his photo cheatsheet.
2nd - doesn’t know linux basic cli commands like cd, ls, rm. not an ounce of knowledge. He told me he is used to developing in Windows. Now this. I can’t forgive him for not knowing this shit. cd (change dir) even exists in windows command line. He even has guts to say to everyone he wants to try working in our servers. The HORROR!
3rd - not sure if knowing junit and matchers of hamcrest, if you are working with Java is a must. But this guy doesn’t understand Matchers of Junit. How the fuck did he ensure effing quality in his prev work.
All in all, seems like this guy doesn’t understand the basics of current development tools.9 -
Once upon a time there lived an old man who was waiting for his AJAX response, some say he is still waiting to this day.
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I never had a good boss, I've got two of the worst stereotypes of boss :
- the exigeant non-tech thinking he knows tech that asked to make an Android app for 1000€ and forgot to say he wanted an iOS app also
- The typical "fonctionnaire" (don't know if there is an equivalent in English, it's a state worker in France) manager, who thought his work was the only important work, who made me do a work I would have done in two weeks in 6 month1 -
Dev, boss and guy who know logic is looking at the server.
Problem: it's not responding
Boss: we need this running now! Otherwise the sales won't go through
Dev: give me a chance, I just got here
Guy: have you tried turning it off and on again?
They did so and at works.
Boss: guess we don't need to hire another dev, this guy knows what he is talking about, he is some kind of server expert..
Really.........1 -
I feel like being a doctor is like being a contract dev. You're thrown into a bad situation, you know the stack but you don't know the project history, best practices aren't followed, and the only dev is also the primary stakeholder who learned everything he knows from w3schools.2
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So I work in a startup where all my co-workers are 6-7 years elder to me. There is this guy who keeps asking me how is my work going.
I tell him, he gives me a weird clueless look and leaves.
I wonder why he even asks me everytime if he is least bothered about what I do. I see all others minding their own business and busy coding. But this guy is one whom I have always seen jobless.
So now I have decided that next time he asks me I will tell any random shit to him to see if what I have been telling was always shit to him .2 -
To the one who named his Stressball stressy.
This is my Stressball and he is called Michael.
(Any resemblance to a living person is purely coincidental)1 -
What was supposed to be an inoffensive shutdown during the weekend for maintenance became a nightmare today. The storage went to the space thanks to a system admin who was supposed to know what is doing. Since there is no power button I just pulled the power cord, he said.3
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When you have a great idea but work and other projects delay it... When you finally get around to it, someone seems to have had the same idea, at the same time, but actually made it happen!
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I have resigned from my current organisation. The HR guy here is kinda my friend. He asked me about my next organisation and my position there.
After listening to my reply, he asked my personal email id and forwarded his resume there.
The irony doesn't end here. The HR girl who was talking to me on behalf of the next organisation, told me today that tomorrow is her last day and introduced me to her colleague who will be my point of contact.
The HR people are so messed up. -
context: I'm sort of a self-deprecating guy and I really don't look for validation.
So, i decided to fuck it. I tried to provide the best decisions in terms of money-wise/biz-wise but apparently this guys rather choose what he believes is best for the code... (he knows shit of coding and that's coming from someone who is not a software engineer but rather a physicist who happens to code).
So, now i let him make all decisions. no opinion from me. a few things are going to shit because of him... fuck it. i had it. as long as I get paid. fuck him.
this is probably common... sorry for the rant.7 -
My dad. he inspires me to explore the computer world because he opened a computer service center when i was a kid. i followed him since then. but the only difference is i know a lot of coding than he does.
i'm very different than my other siblings who pursue career in medical world. that made me asked myself whether or not I'm adopted lol.1 -
When an individual who knows you are programmer approaches you and tells you he has an idea that is like Facebook but better than Facebook.
<rant> wtf is this guy saying? </rant>1 -
My dev role model is our humble and stupid senior developer.
He gives hope to everyone that there is at least one person who knows less but is at a higher rank.
Several devs never faced imposter syndrome for him 🙏 -
I've worked with few incompetent people till now, but one guy who stands out is my peer who is a "Lead Developer".
First of all he knows nothing!! Even Jon Snow knows something, but this guy knows absolutely nothing. And on top of that he has a hard ass attitude. Never sticks to coding standards, pushes unwanted configuration files to Git, uses too many nested loops even when not even a single one is required.
And when I suggest him something, he starts giving these lame ass reasons and tries to avoid my comments. Then I say, "good luck with that buddy" and move on!!1 -
Fucking customer industrial machine doesn't work properly because the dumbass who designed the control algo failed to consider basic physics how this shit is even supposed to work. Just to be sure, he also included some race condition in the measurement part of the software.
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Full stack developers are myth . Anyone who claims he is expert in both domains. He is lying. he would be implementing one side crappy solution and showing off that I developed everything from scratch. Tell him you are from monolithic era. You no longer exist. You are doing both side crappy solution go back to school and focus on one thing and come back with one thing which you can do properly23
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Dr. Robert Ford is that dev who made himself indispensable to the organisation by deliberately not commenting his code. He operated under the notion of those senior developers that are the physical manifestation of the documentation gatekeeping the project1
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Jit guy who is onboarding me talks slow, stutters(only in English) and talks 3x fucking times than-repeats sentences, tries to talk about things he does not know and ends with “I don’t remember/know it now”. Someone kill me please. I am too soft against these types, how can I say you are talking too much etc politely? It is like he feels lonely in corona times and wants to “onboard” me whenever possible...
Note: jit guy is the guy who pronounces Git as jit from my old rant.8 -
When you get a freelance dev who thinks he is a superstar dev and he is trying to prove he knows his stuff by throwing his 2 cents at everything and shits all over every architecture and code style decision of the project, even though he is not even familiar with the framework used by the project...1
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There is boy who is born to lower middle class family so there is a money problem envolved and his parnets kept fighting over this probem but they never tell about that to their child. They buy him everything in their budget but the kid knows about their problem, so whenever he really likes something which is costly he never tell his parents about that.
So life passes by and money problem grows bigger and bigger and that feeling grows stronger and stronger so he believes in the quotation that "if you love something you have to let it go" xbox, video games, toys, mobile phone, laptop, even the girl he likes. he knows their problem and never said anything about it so he feels lonely in life. Now the kid is older and in last year of his graduation he finally find a job but in all those graduation year he wants to do something else which require more struggle and is not an easy road. but they invested so much on him that he feel burdened. So again that feeling comes in "Let it go choose the path that is visible not the one which is foogy".
Should he choose the easy path and help his family or take the hard path and find out what is the end of it?1 -
One of my colleagues who thinks he knows all about "big data": "I try to put everything in hadoop, that is my philosophy".
We don't even have a hadoop cluster. -
There is an "SA" who doesn't know anything about different architectures used around, does not ask if he doesn't know and assumes stuff and puts us in those cringe-worthy moments where everyone in the meeting kind of becomes quiet because he is uttering obvious bullshit. He does this in meetings with senior managers and developers from other teams which clearly puts our team down!
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I work with a guy who is genius in his field, but doesn't have much ability outside of it, his view is we should all know what he knows and not bother him with bugs in his code we should fix the issues ourselves. Oh how the shoe was on the other foot when he needed help with a personal app.4
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So I have this PO who is able to understand technicalities. He is also able to use postman and has access to our code - don't ask why. He is trying stuff out with our apis, looking through code to understand parts of the software, etc.
So there are two sides of having a PO who is able to understand us devs on a certain level:
On the one hand you can explain why story x is taking longer than expected. You can even discuss in a proper way, which is nice. On the other hand is he a bit over the top: when we plan stories he already analysed everything, put code into the story and is telling us how to solve an issue or implement a story.
The sad part is that none of my colleagues seem to be bothered by the fact that he is doing my work.
And recently i even heard a sentence like: "I do not understand why this story should have 3Sp. Would be way lower when I do it". Well.. then do it yourself freaking idiot.
That goes so far that he tells other teams how to fix their code when there is an issue, because he has access to the code and can (unfortunately) read it..
Very unpleasant. :/ So: do you guys have/had the same issues? Am I overreacting?3 -
Potential client emailed me this as a design for the website he wants me to create..
Is there anyone here who would like to explain this design to me? I assume it's a landing page.14 -
There is this try hard dude in my group project team who runs Kali Linux as host (to look cool I think), won't ask anyone for help, yesterday spotted him trying to install a rpm package on his host *facepalm*. Later ran into a guy who kept insisting on me to install windows on my machine just because he thinks it is better, what the fuck is happening here?5
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A guy (who is ending the same master degree as me) just launched his personal website saying he is webdesigner but used a very common bootstrap template. The future is good for this one 😂14
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When a senior engineer who was essentially a DBA on his last project is made tech lead on an iOS team. He had no iOS background before this and now he thinks hes a friggin architect.1
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Back in 2013, My CEO hired a new Manager for the R&D department, who supposedly had over 15 years of extensive experience with Windows and Windows server.
On his first day he suddenly turns toward my colleague, who is sitting right next to me and asks "Do you have a setup for Sticky Notes?", we were using "Windows 7".
The entire room turns toward him as he said that and started laughing quietly. -
So was freelancing for a guy and I know him pretty well or so I thought. Turns out he is a corrupt prick who leaked one of his support staffs phone number to all the customers because she wasn't online for two days. What the fuck is wrong with some people.rant freelance why web development wtf fucking hell game creepy fucking fuck leak what the fuck fuck
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Have a friend who wants to enrich his coding portfolio but is scared of people copying his more serious code if he puts it up on github.
Told him it's all about open source and he could just keep the more casual code up there while giving access to serious projects on request from a company, but it's not very ideal, is it?
What would you tell him?7 -
When your boss calls for a meeting with the whole IT department because he is too worried about losing face by lecturing the guy who talked back to him.
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We have a new senior manager who I now report directly to and he’s actively reducing the amount of input I have with everything and everyone. He seems to be targeting everyone who was hired/promoted by the pervious senior manager who he replaced.
I think it’s time I started looking for another job. He obviously doesn’t want me here and is doing everything he can to make my life difficult4 -
My manager keeps pretending to punch me in the groin when I walk past. This happens at least once on every shift. I have asked him to stop doing it more than once, as it makes me jump back and I suffer from a back injury, so it can be quite painful. He laughs about it when he does it, and I am sure he does it in jest, but he refuses to stop doing it. He simply laughs and says he would never actually hit me there, but it’s automatic to jump back out the way.
My friend who is a store manager in another store informs me that because of where he aims, it can be deemed as sexual harassment. Is this the case and what is the way forward?4 -
Does every project have that guy who likes everything organized and strives for it, but at the same time there is nothing to organize because he doesn't do a thing?
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I have one full stack dev, who claims to know Python and Webpack, but the funny thing is that he is complete shit in anything he does
As he is working in office and I work remotely, CEO and CTO give all his doings a priority
The most fucking part was when he left a project for 2 weeks and when came back he told that nothing had changed.
... he didn't even look to the code, or running website, he just told thst nothing was done
I was so insane, that I told him almost everything I think about him
Fortunately, I am still on this job and he in not working on this project =D -
The guy (!dev think he is some kind of analyst) who insists on pacing up and down the open plan office with his Bluetooth headset when on a call1
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A certain custom template engine made by some bored developer who had too much free time and thought he could create something better than other widely used template engines. He somehow convinced the lead dev of the company at that time to use his wonderful creation and it is still there after many years.
Spoilers: it is not better than the template engines he copied the features from, and it somehow fucks up certain parts of the css and javascript which makes it a real pain in the ass to work with. -
Just met the main boss who organized my travel to this country. Guys the chillest boss ive seen. Asked me where is my coworker is he coming. I said yes. He said that lazy bastard5
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Anyone who codes like this?
if(IsThereAValue($("#txt_term").val(), true) == false)
{
}
this is too much!!! damn! complexity!!!
PS. He is my senior developer.6 -
We have a brand new employee who won't ever shut the hell up. He likes talking about "my scripts" a whole lot. Guy really loves scripts. He'd admitted to copying these strings from his previous company.
We had an all-tech meeting today and he went on and on, talking about what was at this old company. He's so damn annoying. Listening to him is pure cringe.7 -
An 'older' client, who is a respected doctor, needed a web site to sell a book he authored about cycling trips.
Simple... I thought... Until he literally sent me all the content.. hand written... on pen and paper... via snail mail... Along with barely legible Hand-drawn maps... fml2 -
I have this friend who says that using bootstrap(prebuilt css styles) is freeloading if other people’s work. So, I asked him to create his own OS cause he is freeloading of Apple create his own laptop cause he his freeloading Apple. What an Idiot!3
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So here is my take on a shitty teacher.
I once had a microcontroller teacher, who tried to teach a class of non programmers how to code, from a broken compendium. While he was teaching he would correct errors that he found. Most of the classes would be pure theory on C and no exercises.
Needles to say after the first two semesters none of the students could program, and over half of the class had left the school. -
I have this one friend of mine, he lives in another city but he asked me to help him out with programming, the problem is , the guy is impossible to help.
Just yesterday I was to help him install ruby on Ubuntu, he texts me saying he is getting an error, I ask him to send me a screenshot , he says he's working on it, now he has been stuck for two days, who can tell him he doesn't have to die installing ruby, and you don't have to suffer every error you get and getting help doesn't mean you ain't learning.3 -
Ok so I'm a student so I don't have a boss but man this one kid who is the lead of my programming team. I swear he works with a 10ft pole up his a**. Maybe that's why he is so tall 🤔. Anyways he is a nerd and by far my LEAST favorite person ever. I wish nothing but BSODs in his future. He is a devrant user but I'm not gonna name him to hurt his feelings. *cough* ewpratten *cough* but im.pretty sure he copy pastas 🍝 his code from stack schools and pastes it in our mainframe robot.
#BSODToPratten3 -
In CS class I had a only 10 lines long python script (everything else was commented out). It didn't work and I searched the bug for ca 20 minutes. I asked a class mate (who commented the other code out) if he could figure it out and he just says: "The indention of the comment is wrong". We had a discussion that it doesn't matter how to indent comments. In the end he selected all the lines, pressed tab and it just worked ?!?!6
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Can I go to CTO and demand that he will demote a "senior engineer" (who takes senior's paycheck) who don't know what "race condition" is, and how to design/deal with it?
Why? Why I can't?15 -
What's the worst kind of creature?
A self assured delusional fuck
One who thinks he knows everything
One who follows his "instinct", not worrying about data
One who sells his way of thinking as the best one
One who likes to build before thinking through. And calls it experimentation
One who thinks a dev is a dev. Not worrying about years of experience.5 -
Am I the only one that hates working with other developers who think they are some kind of God? I mean it's good to have someone confident in your team but it's so frustrating when he or she starts changing code because "this is better".2
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My Team leader is such a bastard who doesn't do any work and every day he has parcel from some online shop like Amazon or something getting graphics card.raspberry pie etc etc and he literally does nothing. These are a guys who cost company and contribute to downfall of the company. If I would have been a CEO I would have fired such guys. But you know the shortcomings of the big company. And his face like a rotten tomato. No expression and most sadist face. You will ever find
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that time when you pass a cv of your friend who is as qualified as you were good 2 yrs ago to your boss and next thing you know he is being offered a much better position than you have3
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Old but gold.
"Project manager is a Person who thinks nine women can deliver a baby in One month."
"Client is the one who doesn't know why he wants a baby." -
I am a newbie.
Just want to know why u use linux as for programming?
Is there anyone who prefers windows over linux even though he is not into gaming stuff?8 -
In my company there is a weekly employee benefit that each employee can get. The advantage is not carry over to next week if you don't take it the current week.
There is a junior in my department who is not taking a weekly benefit. I am sure he know about the weekly benefit because I have explain it to him before.
I said to him if he is not taking his portion of weekly benefit , can I take his instead? I explicitly said it to him that he can said "No" if he wanted and he don't need to consider the junior-senior relationship since I was mentoring him.
He said "I can take his portion if I want".
I know I got his permission but he is a quiet and reserved person (nothing wrong with it) , I am a reserved person myself.
I have to initiate a conversation and give him a chance to speak up like "What do you think about ... ? " , "X,do you think it is a good idea to ..." ,
My question is that does my junior give his permission to take him weekly benefit because he is a reserved person and doesn't like to tell "No".
What do you guy think?18 -
Attend a global game jam with my cousin who is kinda lazy and is looking for girls. I find a good Unity developer and make him join our team. He coded and I helped for everything he needed for looking for music, graphics etc at the end he presented it and claimed all the credit
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Terrence Andrew Davis
He was an unbelievably talented guy. It is sad how his mental illness made him an outsider and imagine things which weren't there, or maybe we are the blinded ones and he saw what code truly could create...
He will always stay in my synapses as "the greatest programmer who has ever lived".1 -
I got a guy who was always sleeping and talking about anime and telling bullshit that he is after uni and actually did nothing useful, he was even snoring and always turning lights on, when everyone was in vampire mode , jeeeez
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My school has a completely open SMTP server. A friend today who works for the tech department just showed me how anyone could fake an email. He did this by sending me an email as the president of the school, it looked legit. He told the security dudes but they can't secure it due to legacy systems. This is madness surely!?! Is open SMTP as bad as I think? (It is at least only accessible on the schools network).3
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I made a wordpress website to one of my friends long time back as he wants to teach online and sell his videos. (he is studying MBBS)
Yesterday suddenly he calls me and says our site has been compromised and its not longer secure.
Me: After seeing screenshot, no actually site doesn't have ssl and in recent chrome updates http site is being flagged.
He: Okay, I saw video on youtube how to buy ssl.
Me: its not just installing the certs, all the links and images has to be on https so it will take sometime for me.
He: Today, Website is no longer opening please help after putting ssl as per the video...
Me: What the hell? Who asked you to do that? Are you nuts?
He:................. Sorry, 😐2 -
Who found out the hard way he is now very intolerant to OTC allergy meds? Me.
Who also terribly suffers from seasonal allergy? Yep. Me.
It's going to be a long summer, coding with migraines, sinusitis, and irritated eyes 😞4 -
(If anyone remember) A lot of mine two months old rants were related to one of my client who also happened to be my relative. Now this client's uncle (who is also a relative) sent a message to me and asked me if I can put one of his nephew in my company. He assured me he's a good programmer.
Are you fucking kidding me? Just like that? If he was any good, he would have got a job or at least would have done anything by himself.
P.S. When I looked at his CV, he knew almost all languages :-/3 -
Richard Garriott (alias Lord British). The pionier of RPGs and great influencer of the MMORPG Genre.
Not everyone will know this guy. But the ppl who know what he is responsible for ... will agree ;) -
I was about 12 years old and I was in 2nd year of high school (here in Belgium high school is from 12 to 18 after which you go to college or university). During that year I befriended someone who was already very interested in computer stuff and things and he kind of set me off. Ever since he got me into IT I really never looked back. (he is still my friend by the way and I'm now in college)2
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Back when Steve Jobs died, and my brother and I were freaking out and telling the bad news to everyone in our family, my sister said: "Who's Steve Jobs? Is he the guy who invented Twitter?"
😑 I can't even... 😥16 -
I have a colleague who has 2 monitors at work.But only uses one, other is switched off
Tried convincing. Did not work. He just prefers one. I just do not understand.
Anyone else prefer just one monitor and alt + tabs? O.o8 -
Interesting definitions
1. Project Manager is a Person who thinks nine Women can deliver a baby in One month.
2. Developer is a Person who thinks it will take 18 months to deliver a Baby.
3. Onsite Coordinator is one who thinks single Woman can deliver nine babies in one month.
4. Client is the one who doesn’t know why he wants a baby.
5. Marketing Manager is a person who thinks he can deliver a baby even if no man and woman are available.
6. Resource Optimization Team thinks they don’t Need a man or woman; They’ll produce a child with zero resources.
7. Documentation Team thinks they don’t care whether the child is delivered, they’ll just document 9 months.
8. Quality Auditor is the person who is never happy with the PROCESS to produce a baby.
9. Tester is a person who always tells his wife that this is not the Right baby. -
That moment when..
in college lab work
you are the only person who knows how to do it and
lab assistant is behind you and..
he is watching your code and..
he gives correction to you..!! -
Most of the high voted posts here are Anti-AI. Well myself a python script, and I also don't like robots. I like my master -- the programmer who created me. I think he is human.2
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An ex boss, who is obviously a project / marketing manager, claims he understands code and all, couldn't even edit the text inside a html element. R U SRS?
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A coworker who is not interested in getting better as a developer and he's a junior btw. Not interested might not be the right word but lazy or even frightened. He likes to give his ignorant opinion on everything, mostly on things he doesn't understand. He's ok to talk to but ignorance shines through. Now thinks that a MacBook will do wonders for him.1
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"The web is the ultimate customer-empowering environment. He or she who clicks the mouse gets to decide everything. It is so easy to go elsewhere; all the competitors in the world are but a mouseclick away." - Jakob Nielsen2
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Alright so this guy is arguing with me about programming, saying that I don't understand how a compiler works because I said that computers parse code when executing it. He says I'm wrong because the code is in machine language. Who is correct?4
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Sad story , i guess im not the only one.
I have literally no friends who like to code or who seem to like but are lazy. Nothing
Is boring to work on personal projects or school projects like this :/
But today found out that theres only one in my school who does this, he is not that much into it but when he asked me what languages i use, also if i use php ...
I was happy inside to know that im not the only one in my school :D
That's all! Is here anyone or was in this situation , having no friends who like to code 🤔1 -
The newcomer who is 35 years old starting talking about his previous jobs and he reaches a point where he says exactly this
- IBM’s AS400 is the perfect operating system that ever existed, nothing can surpass it from today’s operating systems.
I nearly screamed at him for so many reasons that I could not even start to explain and kind of blacked out from the overflow so I responded with
- Aha1 -
There is one thing that will haunt me forever.
In my old job I was asked to fix some PHP code written by a guy who recently left the company.
Not only passwords were hardcoded in the code, but also he named all the variables like $a, $b, $c. And I still wonder, how comes he was not fired but left on his own terms?6 -
So I'm on one project which was previously developed (I mean poorly developed) by another firm.
So this fucking guy who has done all the coding, I just fucking hate that guy because he has the shittiest logic and he doesn't know things should always be dynamic.
So he has written code(in PHP) where he has calculated the difference between DateTime and he is adding days, hours and minutes to another DateTime.
And it took me fucking 5hours to realize that he just forgot there is a thing called month which should be considered while doing this, I mean WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK?
It was calculating like the difference between
2018-07-12 and 2018-09-18 are FUCKING 6 DAYS WTF!!!! SERIOUSLY? HOW COULD SOMEONE MISS THIS?WTF?!!!! FUCKING 5 HOURS FOR THIS?
Hush!! I think it is my bad that I thought it is DateTime issue and focused on that. I feel good now. Thanks.1 -
Before get get source code for freelance job, the person who cantact me say the job is to continue the project for some update and tweak.
The UI from design is beautiful and he gave good explaination for the project and the update, continue to conversarion, negosiation and deal.
but he is not the IT guy and also the project is not his work or something that he do previosly. All the person who work on that project is already leave and not contactable.
And here that I get:
- source code
- domain cred.
And here what's missing:
- documentation
- .env file
- db backup / old db cred.
- server and hosting cred.
And after some hour of learning the code I find out that:
- latest commit was 2 year ago and different from production version.
- most of the branch is RnD.
- the code have many wtf/minute lol
And for now I still re-negotiate with the person who give me the project with 2 suggestion from me.
- continue with this code with condition, he need to search for the missing part at least backup db or documentation.
- recreate the project with more time
And here's one funny part of the code.
randomNumber(){
return 5 // this number was choose by dev team at random
}1 -
My boss can barely speak the native language (Spanish) he keeps using grammatical errors and whenever he’s got an idea of how stupid he is he tries to reach us with explaining SOLID and programming paradigms…
I’m so stuck in this 8h, it pays well, but 90% of the time is just acting to admire someone who barely knows how to declare a variable5 -
A question on corporate reality, let me know which person is doing it right :
Person A is a young enthusiastic nd curious fresher who has joined an amazing company where there is a team of seniors above him.
They ask him to work on a project, give him some guidelines which he is able to quickly grasp and come back with an output (because he loves learning and working on it and challenges himself to do it quicker than before)
This goes on and on, the new guy is giving his 100%, but company realizes it and starts expecting more of him, his 100% is not satisfactory enough, he is expected to give his 110% . He is now feeling the pressure but still liking it (because he likes learning) even though it has started to effect his personal lifestyle. He no longer has time for friends and even codes during his nap times, but still believes that he's in his prime and its okay for him to grind wheels for a better future
-------------
Person B is a lazy ass half hearted fresher who's good with public relations. He knows he can do a work in 1 hour, but still does it in 2 hours and do it bad.
He is giving his 50% and seniors know it but still are expecting to get just 70-80% out of him because of his charming and cool personna.
He's cool, now dating office girls, actively partying and is now people's favorite and living a lavish life with equal salary as that of the person A.
Who is living their youth correctly?9 -
Joined a new company as front end developer after working for a legal tech for 3 years. The codebase is shit here. There is this ReactJS developer who has done everything except for following standard code practices. No modularity, no reusable components. Some files go beyond 2000 lines of codes. It is a literal nightmare.
The worst part is, he does not understand that he has written the worst code. I dunno how to handle this now.8 -
There was this prof who loved Ada, it did not bother him that it was not modern. His lecture was mainly based on Ada and where he could he pointed out that it is the best language. He hated JavaScript which I can relate to. None the less it was still interesting and I learned a lot.1
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If there is somebody here who uses WordPress to build Website and think he is a Web Developer 🙄.
Please change your name
You deserve this name *website filler*
You don't develop any fucking thing🙄8 -
How can someone be applauded like a hero for fixing a bug when he’s the one who caused it in the first place?
Gosh Bill, thanks for saving the day! The least the guy could do is acknowledge he fixed something HE broke. But that’s wishful thinking on my part, isn’t it…6 -
We all have that guy in the team who everyone loves because he is such a laugh, but doesn't do shit and we have to work extra to be able to barely meet the deadline4
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I came to a new school this year and didn't know anyone. I found out that there is a kid who likes to code, so I tried getting friendly with him.
Well, he knows HTMl/CSS...
Well, he just does Wordpress...
Well, he actually likes design better...
I've seen someone else who was trying to learn JS, learn with him, and the kid couldn't wrap his head around what a function did...4 -
Alright people could do with some help here!
Got a friend who is interested in learning how to code but I can't think of anything to point him in the right direction, he wants to learn it just so he has something to keep his mind active and give him something he can sit and spend time on...
Anyone know of anyone tutorials/articles/anything that could point him in the right direction?2 -
What if a guy who is actually a gay wants to learn R and actually succeeds?
Well, he becomes gRay.1 -
Story about someone elses rant
A = coworker;
B = random guy from company, but from another office;
C = manager we like a lot, cause he has IT background;
A asked B about a problem, because B worked with the that thing. B answered I dont know. So A asked C, and told him, im asking you, because B said, he dont know. C went nuts and pulled a shitstorm on B, like who WTF do you think you are, that you cant give at least a hint to A on the problem or Cc someone who may know more about the problem.
what i wanna say is, shouldnt it be common sence if someone asks me about a problem i navigate him to a person, who knows more than me? Even if its the first day i the office, I know this is my team leader he should see the bigger picture of the problem, so ask him. But telling idk is like, go fuck your self. -
I know when I've been coding too much, and not reading enough when I first try to find the code line I stopped at and when I'd like to ctrl + click a character's name to remember who he is.
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Next time you meet someone who thinks they’re a genius, even if that person is staring back at you from the mirror, remember this kid’s story. Too bad he died so young. He could have helped humanity with his ideas about better water usage. https://news.join1440.com/t/...3
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When I started at my first job I was a fanboy for a co-worker who writes codes like nothing and there's is nothing he can not do when comes to coding!! I really admire his work. I always think how does he do it?!
Now I have a fanboy for my work 😎 he admires my work he thinks that there's nothing I can't solve.
I get it now, it's just experience and practice!5 -
How to deny a "friend" who is asking me to lend some money ( what he is asking is the largest anyone ever have asked me )?
What's the social etiquette here?
P.S:
I don't have good impression about him.
Few weeks ago, i changed my plans for him so that he could tag along with me to a place quite far away to apply for our course certificate . He delays the plan, not doing what he was supposed to do and had told me he would do.
I end up wasting 3 days waiting on him and finally goes on my own ( how it was supposed to be before I offered him free ride in the first place )
I don't like people who can't keep their words or let alone lie or don't tell you if they are not intending on keeping it.
Now I'm amazed by his nerve to ask money like that.8 -
I've worked in two different companies where the QA department includes the boss's son who is a moody teenager and doesn't seem to actually do much, but is presumably drawing a salary. In the first case he would literally fall asleep at his desk while the rest of us were under pressure to hit deadlines, is this normal?5
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Frédéric Raynal: french programmer who coded videogame Popcorn in 1988. He is still supporting this game, also released android version and versions for iOS and Windows.1
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Debugging API created by developer, who left the company few days back, and he didn't write documentation of it and worse part is variable name used by him doesn't make sense according to context.
LMF!!2 -
Just finished s meeting- change manager wants us to track searches in our apps, count and catalog words that are searched and who is doing the search. He must have read a blob about Google1
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Had a debate with a colleague today over git commits, I had 24 outstanding and he had 15. We came up with a little game...
Who can create the most changes for a single commit. The winner is the one who can remember what each change was without looking at the changes.
Needlessly to say, we both lost 😂 -
I. FUCKING HATE MY STUPID ASS UNCLE. HE IS SUCH AN ASSWIPE BRO ISTG he moved in with us and like I didn't think it would be such a big deal but HIS ASS SCREAMS AT ANYONE WHO DISRUPTS HIM WHILE HES LITERALLY DOING POT IN THE KITCHEN AND LIKE.. BRO DISRESPECTS HIS MOTHER WHO KEEPS THE ENTIRE HOUSE STABLE. HE TAKES ALL HER MONEY and doesnt lay her back like EVER?? And HE FUCKING RUINS EVERY HOLIDAY WE HAVE. And i cant even say anything to him because i have to respect grownups like man.. he aint even man enough to be respected 😹😹😹 he thinks hes scary bro like no. hes just a self centered lazy ass bitch. Im waiting for the day he moves out lmao.3
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So, I have this colleague (tho he is a student in my company, while I'm an employee), who wants to build a site, but doesn't want to learn how to build one...
I literally gave him everything one needs, yet he still complains about it not working the way he wants...
He literally does one out of 3 things:
- play shitty games and cheats in them
- attempt to build a site without understanding the "why does it work?"
- bother me with dumb questions that have been asked 1000000 times on StackOverflow... -
"He who cannot draw on three thousand years is living from hand to mouth." - Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
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I have this workmate who whenever we are given a project to work together as a team always makes me feel like isht. I always come up with cool features but he will never appreciate my effort. But when he implements his idea and I oppose it, I can see the anger and hatred in his eyes. Is it only me who experiences that? I hate the guy.1
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Theo, the man who everyone looks up to as a dev, especially a nextjs dev, the man who created t3 stack--says he doesnt write unit tests and thinks unit testing is a waste of time
Have devs fallen into the new low?17 -
sorry for not ranting but im quite anxiously looking for a talk about Domain Driven Design. I think it was from Eric Evans but the ones I found yet arent it. he has a very speqking example of shipping which he usus throughout his talk, speaking in front of quite a big crowd, interacting with the crowd and no desk or anything in front..... Is there anyone who knows which talk I mean? Infinite kudo's to he who does!1
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I met a strange man who claimed to be a time traveller from the future, researching the collapse of human civilisation.
He asked me where it all went wrong.
I said, the Americans thought they could sell Sesame Street to the Russians.
He said, I know what Sesame Street is, but what are Americans and Russians?
I explained as well as I could, and he nodded sadly, and went on his way, apparently satisfied with the explanation. -
I had a client with an ongoing project. Everything was going fine until her boy-asshole-friend talked to me by phone... He was so ignorant.
Don't get me wrong. I'm not talking about the ignorant who doesn't know anything. I'm talking about the ignorant who doesn't know a shit but he is talking about it and refuses to get a professional advice. He told me explicitly: "Don't use test server for testing your project. Do it directly on production"
Unnecessary to say that my client "suspended" the project.1 -
the boy needed dick surgery..... and there was his girlfriend before surgery and she's like "don't worry it'll be alright"..... and then he woke up after anesthesia and everything went fine but there was no girlfriend......... and he asked where is my girlfriend...... and doctor told him "who do you think gave you the dick"....... this is so sad..... liek if u agree...........4
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An old friend of mine who I haven't seen in ages just texted me. He says his father, who recused my suggestion to clean his HDD for him instead of actually hiring someone to do that, asked me to "fix" his computer.
Me: Well, what's wrong with it?
Him: Nothing, it's just that his PC is really slow. Remember he uses a Vaio?
My best hope is to get the poor dude an running Xubuntu on his machine and hope he adapts to it. -
Repel people who think just because I did IT (and they skip the part to ask, what specifically in IT), I can fix their computers only and I'm of no use beyond that. Immediately they think "he is an IT guy maybe he can fix..." Vrooommm and they are no longer in my view
Magnetic repulsion like how Magneto pushed away Logan in "Days of Future Past" -
I love this Pm who saw the way I was stressed up due to deadline. He told me don't worry nobody is going to die
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Teacher: New idea. Let's use excel for a better management with oop.
*you give a hard think* Alright I can see how this would work
*ten minutes into it* WHO IS HE? THE DEVIL? -
SAD END😭😭
The world of cinema is in mourning as the actor Jason Statham, who plays Frank Martin in the film "the transporter" was shot in his home in New York by thieves who broke into his home.
He wanted to stand against them to protect his family but the thugs were right about him.
He was shot 4 bullets one in the head three in the chest 😭
This all happened around 2:18 am in a movie I watched last night.
SAD END🙄🤫8 -
So I go on scratch (Mild Scratch Programmer), and I see this one person, Who does NOT know how to script or program, even though he specifically states IN HIS PROFILE, that he is a "Professional Scratch Maker", Not even the correct term to describe a "Scratch Project Developer". I literally told him in his profile chat, that the way he described what he was, wasnt the right way and tried to help him update it, and he completely blew up on me and starting getting toxic......God I hate toxic kids.5
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I love the feeling of producing the design specifications to a client, who is complaining that a feature doesn't work the way he expected. Even though you highlighted that it would be combersome to use before development.
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How do you handle a colleague who just throws his/her work at you saying that he/she is able to implememt things at his/her side in meetings. And when you ask on personal he/she says not done yet !? Things getting delayed because of that and I don't know what to do ? can you give some advice.....1