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Good Morning!, its time for practiseSafeHex's most incompetent co-worker!
Todays contestant is a very special one.
*sitcom audience: WHY?*
Glad you asked, you see if you were to look at his linkedin profile, you would see a job title unlike any you've seen before.
*sitcom audience oooooooohhhhhh*
were not talking software developer, engineer, tech lead, designer, CTO, CEO or anything like that, No No our new entrant "G" surpasses all of those with the title ..... "Software extraordinaire".
*sitcom audience laughs hysterically*
I KNOW!, wtf does that even mean! as a previous dev-ranter pointed out does this mean he IS quality code? I'd say he's more like a trash can ... where his code belongs
*ba dum tsssss*
Ok ok, lets get on with the show, heres some reasons why "G" is on the show:
One of G's tasks was to build an analytics gathering library for iOS, similar to google analytics where you track pages and events (we couldn't use google's). G was SO good at this job he implemented 2 features we didn't even ask for:
- If the library was unable to load its config file (for any reason) it would throw an uncatchable system integrity error, crashing the app.
- If anything was passed into any of the functions that wasn't expected (null, empty array etc.) it would crash the app as it was "more efficient" to not do any sanity checks inside the library.
This caused a lot of issues as some of the data needed to come from the clients server. The day we launched the app, within the first 3 hours we had over 40k crash logs and a VERY angry client.
Now, what makes this story important is not the bugs themselves, come on how many times have we all done something stupid? No the issue here was G defended all of this as the right thing to do!
.. and no he wasn't stoned or drunk!
G claimed if he couldn't get the right settings / params he wouldn't be able to track the event and then our CEO wouldn't have our usage data. To which I replied:
"So your solution was to not give the client an app instead? ... which also doesn't give the CEO his data".
He got very angry and asked me "what would you do then?". I offered a solution something like why not have a default tag for "error" or "unknown" where if theres an issue, we send up whatever we have, plus the file name and store it somewhere else. I was told I was being ridiculous as it wasn't built to track anything like that and that would never work ... his solution? ... pull the library out of the app and forget it.
... once again giving everyone no data.
G later moved onto another cross-platform style project. Backend team were particularly unhappy as they got no spec of what needed to be done. All they knew was it was a single endpoint dealing with very complex model. There was no Java classes, super classes, abstract classes or even interfaces, just this huge chunk of mocked data. So myself and the lead sat down with him, and asked where the interfaces for the backend where, or designs / architecture for them etc.
His response, to this day frightens me ... not makes me angry, not bewilders me ... scares the living shit out of me that people like this exist in the world and have successful careers.
G: "hhhmmm, I know how to build an interface, but i've never understood them ... Like lets say I have an interface, what now? how does that help me in any way? I can't physically use it, does it not just use up time building it for no reason?"
us: "... ... how are the backend team suppose to understand the model, its types, integrate it into the other systems?"
G: "Can I not just tell them and they can write it down?"
**
I'll just pause here for a moment, as you'll likely need to read that again out of sheer disbelief
**
I've never seen someone die inside the way the lead did. He started a syllable and his face just dropped, eyes glazed over and he instantly lost all the will to live. He replied:
" wel ............... it doesn't matter ... its not important ... I have to go, good luck with the project"
*killed the screen share and left the room*
now I know you are all dying in suspense to know what happened to that project, I can drop the shocking bombshell that it was in fact cancelled. Thankfully only ~350 man hours were spent on it
... yep, not a typo.
G's crowning achievement however will go down in history. VERY long story short, backend got deployed to the server and EVERYTHING broke. Lead investigated, found mistakes and config issues on every second line, load balancer wasn't even starting up. When asked had this been tested before it was deployed:
G: "Yeah I tested it on my machine, it worked fine"
lead: "... and on the server?"
G: "no, my machine will do the same thing"
lead: "do you have a load balancer and multiple VM's?"
G: "no, but Java is Java"
... and with that its time to end todays episode. Will G be our most incompetent? ... maybe.
Tune in later for more practiceSafeHex's most incompetent co-worker!!!31 -
Frack he did it again.
In a meeting with the department mgr and going over a request feature *we already discussed ad nauseam* that wasn’t technically feasible (do-able, just not worth the effort)
DeptMgr: “I want to see the contents of web site A embedded in web site B”
Me: “I researched that and it’s not possible. I added links to the target APM dashboard instead.”
Dev: “Yes, it’s possible. Just use an IFrame.”
DeptMgr: “I thought so. Next sprint item …what’s wrong?…you look frustrated”
Me: “Um..no…well, I said it’s not possible. I tried it and it doesn’t work”
Dev: “It’s just an IFrame. They are made to display content from another site.”
Me: “Well, yes, from a standard HTML tag, but what you are seeing is rendered HTML from the content manager’s XML. It implemented its own IFrame under the hood. We already talked about it, remember?”
Dev: “Oh, that’s right.”
DeptMgr: “So it’s possible?”
Dev: “Yea, we’ll figure it out.”
Me: “No…wait…figure what out? It doesn’t work.”
Dev: “We can use a powershell script to extract the data from A and port it to B.”
DeptMgr: “Powershell, good…Next sprint item…”
Me: “Powershell what? We discussed not using powershell, remember?”
Dev: “It’s just a script. Not a big deal.”
DeptMgr: “Powershell sounds like a right solution. Can we move on? Next sprint item….are you OK? You look upset”
Me: “No, I don’t particularly care, we already discussed executing a powershell script that would have to cross two network DMZs. Bill from networking already raised his concern about opening another port and didn’t understand why we couldn’t click a link. Then Mike from infrastructure griped about another random powershell script running on his servers just for reporting. He too raised his concern about all this work to save one person one click. Am I the only one who remembers this meeting? I mean, I don’t care, I’ll do whatever you want, but we’ll have to open up the same conversations with Networking again.”
Dev: “That meeting was a long time ago, they might be OK with running powershell scripts”
Me: “A long time ago? It was only two weeks.”
Dev: “Oh yea. Anyway, lets update the board. You’ll implement the powershell script and I’ll …”
Me: “Whoa..no…I’m not implementing anything. We haven’t discussed what this mysterious powershell script is supposed to do and we have to get Mike and Bill involved. Their whole team is involved in the migration project right now, so we won’t see them come out into the daylight until next week.”
DevMgr: “What if you talk to Eric? He knows powershell. OK…next sprint item..”
Me: “Eric is the one who organized the meeting two weeks ago, remember? He didn’t want powershell scripts hitting his APM servers. Am I the only one who remembers any of this?”
Dev: “I’m pretty good with powershell, I’ll figure it out.”
DevMgr: “Good…now can we move on?”
GAAAHH! I WANT A FLAMETHROWER!!!
Ok…feel better, thanks DevRant.11 -
Once upon a time there was a shepherd looking after his sheep on the side of a deserted road. Suddenly a brand new Porsche screeches to a halt. The driver, a man dressed in an Armani suit, Cerutti shoes, Ray-Ban sunglasses, TAG-Heuer wrist-watch, and a Versace tie, gets out and asks the Shepherd:
Man: “If I can tell you how many sheep you have, will you give me one of them?”
The shepherd looks at the young man, and then looks at the large flock of grazing sheep and replies:
Shepherd: “Okay.”
The young man parks the car, connects his laptop to the mobile-fax, enters a NASA Webster, scans the ground using his GPS, opens a database and 60 Excel tables filled with logarithms and pivot tables, then prints out a 150 page report on his high-tech mini-printer. He turns to the shepherd and says,
Man: “You have exactly 1,586 sheep here.”
The shepherd cheers,
Shepherd: “That’s correct, you can have your sheep.”
The young man makes his pick and puts it in the back of his Porsche. The shepherd looks at him and asks,
Shepherd: “If I guess your profession, will you return my animal to me?”
The young man answers;
Man: “Yes, why not?”
Shepherd: "You are an IT consultant."
Man: “How did you know?”
Shepherd: “Very simple. First, you came here without being called. Second, you charged me a fee to tell me something I already knew, and third, you don’t understand anything about my business…Now can I have my DOG back?"3 -
This is kind of a horror story, with a happing ending. It contains a lot of gore images, and some porn. Very long story.
TL;DR Network upgrade
Once upon a time, there were two companies HA and HP, both owned by HC. Many years went by and the two companies worked along side each one another, but sometimes there were trouble, because they weren't sure who was supposed to bill the client for projects HA and HP had worked on together.
At HA there was an IT guy, an imbecile of such. He's very slow at doing his job, doesn't exactly understand what he's doing, nor security principles.
The IT guy at HA also did some IT work for HP from time to time when needed. But he was not in charge of the infrastructure for HP, that was the jobb for one developer who didn't really know what he was doing either.
Whenever a new server was set up at HP, the developer tried many solutions, until he landed on one, but he never removed the other tested solutions, and the config is scattered all around. And no documentation!!
Same goes with network, when something new was added, the old was never removed or reconfigured to something else.
One dark winter, a knight arrived at HP. He had many skills. Networking, server management, development, design and generally a fucking awesome viking.
This genius would often try to cleanse the network and servers, and begged his boss to let him buy new equipment to replace the old, to no prevail.
Whenever he would look in the server room, he would get shivers down his back.
(Image: https://i.bratteng.xyz/Ie9x3YC33C.j...)
One and a half year later, the powerful owners in HA, HP and HC decided it was finally time to merge HA and HP together to HS. The knight thought this was his moment, he should ask CEO if he could be in charge of migrating the network, and do a complete overhault so they could get 1Gb interwebz speeds.
The knight had to come up with a plan and some price estimates, as the IT guy also would do this.
The IT guy proposed his solution, a Sonicwall gateway to 22 000 NOK, and using a 3rd party company to manage it for 3000 NOK/month.
"This is absurd", said the knight to the CEO and CXO, "I can come up with a better solution that is a complete upgrade. And it will be super easy to manage."
The CEO and CXO gave the knight a thumbs up. The race was on. We're moving in 2 months, I got to have the equipment by then, so I need a plan by the end of the week.
He roamed the wide internet, looked at many solutions, and ended up with going for Ubiquiti's Unifi series. Cheap, reliable and pretty nice to look at.
The CXO had mentioned the WiFi at HA was pretty bad, as there was WLAN for each meeting room, and one for the desks, so the phone would constantly jump between networks.
So the knight ended up with this solution:
2x Unifi Securtiy Gateway Pro 4
2x Unifi 48port
1x Unifi 10G 16port
5x Unifi AP-AC-Lite
12x pairs of 10G unifi fibre modules
All with a price tag around the one Sonicwall for 22 000 NOK, not including patch cables, POE injectors and fibre cables.
The knight presented this to the CXO, whom is not very fond of the IT guy, and the CXO thought this was a great solution.
But the IT guy had to have a say at this too, so he was sent the solution and had 2 weeks to dispute the soltion.
Time went by, CXO started to get tired of the waiting, so he called in a meeting with the knight and the IT guy, this was the IT guys chance to dispute the solution.
All he had to say was he was familiar with the Sonicwall solution, and having a 3rd party company managing it is great.
He was given another 2 weeks to dispute the solution, yet nothing happened.
The CXO gave the thumbs up, and the knight orders the equipment.
At this time, the knight asks the IT guy for access to the server room at HA, and a key (which would take 2 months to get sorted, because IT guys is a slow imbecile)
The horrors, Oh the horrors, the knight had never seen anything like this before.
(Image: https://i.bratteng.xyz/HfptwEh9qT.j...)
(Image: https://i.bratteng.xyz/HfptwEh9qT.j...)
(Image: https://i.bratteng.xyz/hmOE2ZuQuE.j...)
(Image: https://i.bratteng.xyz/4Flmkx6slQ.j...)
What are all these for, why is there a fan ductaped to on of the servers.
WHAT IS THIS!
Why are there cables tied in a knot.
WHY!
These are questions we never will know the answers too.
The knight needs access to the servers, and sonicwall to see how this is configured.
After 1.5 month he gains access to the sonicwall and one of the xserve.
What the knight discovers baffles him.
All ports are open, sonicwall is basically in bridge mode and handing out public IPs to every device connected to it.
No VLANs, everything, just open...10 -
"Ok, the site looks fine. Now let's move the style tag into it's own file."
*makes css file*
"WHY DOES IT HARDLY EVER LOAD!?!?, I checked the syntax trice"
*Spends 20 min. Asking friends for help, but none of them knows a reason*
"Time to ask the teacher, I guess"
*Teacher comes over, but has no clue either*
Teacher: "Give me the files, let's test it on my laptop"
*Css doesn't load there either*
*Teachers pair programming and trying some serious debugging technics. No progress*
*I decided to look at the sourcecode while refreshing the site*
1. Refresh: Css is loaded properly
2. Refresh: Css is gone, and source turned into various asian symbols.
Looks at the (default) file encoding: UCS-2
WTF NOTEPAD++, I SPEND 2 HOURS OF MY LIFE BECAUSE YOU DECIDED THIS WAS A PROPER ENCODING!
Web programming seems fun.12 -
Once upon a time there was a shepherd looking after his sheep on the side of a deserted road. Suddenly a brand new Porsche screeches to a halt. The driver, a man dressed in an Armani suit, Cerutti shoes, Ray-Ban sunglasses, TAG-Heuer wrist-watch, and a Pierre Cardin tie, gets out and asks the shepherd: "If I can tell you how many sheep you have, will you give me one of them?"
The shepherd looks at the young man, and then looks at the large flock of grazing sheep and replies: "Okay."
The young man parks the car, connects his laptop to the mobile-fax, enters a NASA Webster, scans the ground using his GPS, opens a database and 60 Excel tables filled with logarithms and pivot tables, then prints out a 150 page report on his high-tech mini-printer. He turns to the shepherd and says, "You have exactly 1,586 sheep here."
The shepherd cheers, "That's correct, you can have your sheep." The young man makes his pick and puts it in the back of his Porsche. The shepherd looks at him and asks: "If I guess your profession, will you return my animal to me?"
The young man answers, "Yes, why not?" The shepherd says, "You are an IT consultant."
"How did you know?" asks the young man.
"Very simple," answers the shepherd. "First, you came here without being called. Second, you charged me a fee to tell me something I already knew, and third, you don't understand anything about my business... Now can I have my dog back?"3 -
Welcome back to practiseSafeHex's new life as a manager.
Episode 2: Why automate when you can spend all day doing it by hand
This is a particularly special episode for me, as these problems are taking up so much of my time with non-sensical bullshit, that i'm delayed with everything else. Some badly require tooling or new products. Some are just unnecessary processes or annoyances that should not need to be handled by another human. So lets jump right in, in no particular order:
- Jira ... nuff said? not quite because somehow some blue moon, planets aligning, act of god style set of circumstances lined up to allow this team to somehow make Jira worse. On one hand we have a gigantic Jira project containing 7 separate sub teams, a million different labels / epics and 4.2 million possible assignees, all making sure the loading page takes as long as possible to open. But the new country we've added support for in the app gets a separate project. So we have product, backend, mobile, design, management etc on one, and mobile-country2 on another. This delightfully means a lot of duplication and copy pasting from one to the other, for literally no reason what so ever.
- Everything on Jira is found through a label. Every time something happens, a new one is created. So I need to check for "iOS", "Android", "iOS-country2", "Android-country2", "mobile-<feature>", "mobile-<feature>-issues", "mobile-<feature>-prod-issues", "mobile-<feature>-existing-issues" and "<project>-July31" ... why July31? Because some fucking moron decided to do a round of testing, and tag all the issues with the current date (despite the fact Jira does that anyway), which somehow still gets used from time to time because nobody pays attention to what they are doing. This means creating and modifying filters on a daily basis ... after spending time trying to figure out what its not in the first one.
- One of my favourite morning rituals I like to call "Jira dumpster diving". This involves me removing all the filters and reading all the tickets. Why would I do such a thing? oh remember the 9000 labels I mentioned earlier? right well its very likely that they actually won't use any of them ... or the wrong ones ... or assign to the wrong person, so I have to go find them and fix them. If I don't, i'll get yelled at, because clearly it's my fault.
- Moving on from Jira. As some of you might have seen in your companies, if you use things like TestFlight, HockeyApp, AppCenter, BuddyBuild etc. that when you release a new app version for testing, each version comes with an automated change-log, listing ticket numbers addressed ...... yeah we don't do that. No we use this shitty service, which is effectively an FTP server and a webpage, that only allows you to host the new versions. Sending out those emails is all manual ... distribution groups?? ... whats that?
- Moving back to Jira. Can't even automate the changelog with a script, because I can't even make sense of the tickets, in order to translate that to a script.
- Moving on from Jira. Me and one of the remote testers play this great game I like to call "tag team ticketing". It's so much fun. Right heres how to play, you'll need a QA and a PM.
*QA creates a ticket, and puts nothing of any use inside it, and assigns to the PM.
*PM fires it back asking for clarification.
*QA adds in what he feels is clarification (hes wrong) and assigns it back to the PM.
*PM sends detailed instructions, with examples as to what is needed and assigns it back.
*QA adds 1 of the 3 things required and assigns it back.
*PM assigns it back saying the one thing added is from the wrong day, and reminds him about the other 2 items.
*QA adds some random piece of unrelated info to the ticket instead, forgetting about the 3 things and assigns it back.
and you just continue doing this for the whole dev / release cycle hahaha. Oh you guys have no idea how much fun it is, seriously give it a go, you'll thank me later ... or kill yourselves, each to their own.
- Moving back to Jira. I decided to take an action of creating a new project for my team (the mobile team) and set it up the way we want and just ignore everything going on around us. Use proper automation, and a kanban board. Maybe only give product a slack bot interface that won't allow them to create a ticket without what we need etc. Spent 25 minutes looking for the "create new project" button before finding the link which says I need to open a ticket with support and wait ... 5 ... fucking ... long ... painful ... unnecessary ... business days.
... Heres hoping my head continues to not have a bullet hole in it by then.
Id love to talk more, but those filters ain't gonna fix themselves. So we'll have to leave it here for today. Tune in again for another episode soon.
And remember to always practiseSafeHex13 -
Every programming language I know of does trigonometry in radians.
Yet I have been puzzled for 4 hours whether JS was broken because it kept saying Math.sin(30) != Math.sin(150), trying all kinds of values, looking up basic trigonometry stuff again and again.
After that, 10 minutes of wondering why my json was invalid... right, you can't comment things out.
Then 15 minutes being baffled by a simple script tag not working, because I wrote script href instead of script src.
Finally, I threw a liter of chocolate milk over a $400 keyboard.
I really need to stop setting up new projects at 3am.7 -
Fuck code.org. Fuck code. Not code code, but "code" (the word "code"). I hate it. At least for teaching. Devs can use it as much as they want, they know what it means and know you can't hack facebook with 10 seconds of furiously typing "code" into a terminal. What the fuck are you thinking when you want me to hack facebook? No, when I program, it's not opening terminal, changing to green text and typing "hack <insert website name here, if none is given, this will result to facebook.com>" Can you just shut the fuck up about how you think that because you can change the font in google fucking docs you have the right to tell me what code can and can't do? No, fuck you. Now to my main point, fuck "code" (the string). It's an overused word, and it's nothing but a buzzword (to non devs, you guys know what you're talking about. how many times have you seen someone think they are a genius when they here the word "code"?) People who don't know shit don't call themselves programmers or devs, they call themselves coders. Why? It fucking sounds cool, and I won't deny that, but the way it's talked about in movies, by people, (fucking) code.org, etc, just makes people too much of a bitch for me to handle. I want everyone reading this rant who has friends who respect the fact that YOU know code (I truly believe everyone on devRant does), how it works, and it's/your limitations, AND that it takes hard work and effort, to thank god right now. If you're stuck with some people like me, I feel you. Never say "code" near them again. Say "program." I really hate people who think they know what an HTML tag is and go around calling themselves coders. Now onto my main point, code.org. FUCK IT. CAN YOU STOP RUINING MY FUCKING AP CS CLASS. NO CODE.ORG, I DON'T NEED TO WATCH YOUR TEN GODDAMN VIDEOS ON HOW TECHNOLOGY IS IMPORTANT, <sarcasm>I'VE BEEN LIVING UNDER A ROCK FOR THIRTY YEARS</sarcasm>. DO I REALLY NEED ANOTHER COPY OF SCRATCH? WAIT, NO, SCRATCH WAS BETTER. YOU HAD FUCKING MICROSOFT, GOOGLE, AND OTHER TECHNOLOGICAL GIANTS AND YOU FUCKED UP SO BAD YOU MADE IT WORSE THAT SCRATCH. JUST LETMECODE (yes I said that) AND STOP TALKING ABOUT HOW SOME IRRELEVANT ROBOT ARM DEVELOPED BY MIT IS USING AI AND MACHINE LEARNING TO MAKE SOME ROBOT EVOLVE?! IF YOU SPEND ONE MORE SECOND SAYING "INNOVATION" I'LL SHOVE THAT PRINT STATEMENT YOU HAVE A SYNTAX ERROR UP YOUR ASS. DON'T GET ME FUCKING STARTED ON HOW ITS IMPOSSIBLE TO DO ANYTHING FOR YOURSELF WHEN YOUR GETTING ALL THE ANSWERS WITHOUT DOING ANY WORK AND THE FACT THAT JAVASCRIPT IS YOUR FUCKING LANGUAGE. <sarcasm>GREAT IDEA, LETS GET THESE NEW PROGRAMMERS INTO A PROFESSIONAL ENVOIRMENT BY ADDING A DRAG AND DROP CODE (obviously we can say it) EDITOR</sarcasm> MAYBE IF YOU GOT THIS SHIT UP YOUR ASS AND TO YOUR BRAIN YOU'D ACTUALLY GET TO PRPGRAMMING IN YOUR ADVANCED AP COURSE. ITS CALLED FUCKING CODE.ORG FOR A REASON32
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Devrant black theme is here! Thanks to @Floydian and @Stuxnet for the idea and the tag! You can also grayscale all images, for that late night devrant viewing.
https://github.com/7twin/...
Previous rant: https://devrant.com/rants/1554399/...
89 -
Making a contest site for a client. It's 2 parts, a static part and then a "hub" where the contest actually takes part. I did most of the static part, and uploaded it to show her. She likes it, but wants to be able to change the content automatically without having to talk to me. Ok, I think. The harder part is the contest site, so she's not gonna run away with my code. I give her access to the ftp and teach her what to do.
To my amazement she takes a liking to html. And starts adding some (super simple) tags. They ruin some of my designs but they look fine. Whatever.
Today she messages me saying that the top picture is off. Hmm, I'll check it out. Turns out almost the entire page is ruined. What's even worse is that she inserted a link to a facebook image she has on top of everything, a picture I don't have access to, and yet she's refusing to admit that it was her mistake. It's not even wrapped in an img tag, it's just pure text!!!
Fine. I'll revert to the version I had. No! cz apparently I can't undo all the changes she's worked hard on. So now I have to go through all the markup and check what's causing this -- and I hate frontend!!!
Worst part of this all? She can't fucking be bothered to type out what her whore infested lying mouth wants to say. She has to send me voicenotes, a few minutes long, filled with uhhh ummm let me think, because that brain who thought learning to write <br/> and <em> is bad ass can't FUCKING formulate a thought before sending it. She has to have me stop my music, and stop my concentration just so she can tell me maybe she pasted it by mistake IN A 5 MINUTE VOICE NOTE. tbh the money isn't even that good. I don't know why I'm still here.
PS: it's not missing an include. I checked.7 -
Removed my Facebook account about Month ago. Sister was pretty sad because I'm the one person she can tag in everything. Asked me why I deleted it and I told her it was because of privacy concerns. "Then why don't you make an end to end encrypted social network?". I'd actually consider this...11
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Today I:
Me: "You wrapped 2 p tags and one div inside a button tag....why?"
Other dude: "What do you mean why?" * in condescending tone
Aaaaaaaaaaaand
I lost my shit.
To make things short. My manager told me I have to try harder to not speak to people in intimidating ways.
In all fairness...mr "associates in programming with 0 css experience" WAS condescending when I asked him why he did what he did.
The little shit earned it. And he will probably think twice about his damned tone when speaking to me.29 -
Google: You need a fast website to rank well.
Me: Ok, so why does your Google Analytics, Google Tag Manager, and Google Optimize code drag my site down to the seventh circle of Hell in performance?
Google: You need a fast website to rank well.
Me: ...4 -
Spent 6 hours today trying to figure out why the CSS got all jacked up on a site right before launch.
Turns out, the new college grad who went to school for front end development doesn't know how to specify elements at all.
They made all their edits using the broadest selectors possible, sometimes at the tag level.
Having never looked at the site or mock-ups I had no idea what it was supposed to look like so I spent a lot of time waiting for people to tell me whether things were fixed, and telling what else was broke.
Good thing their college degree means they make 20% more than me.12 -
College can be one of the worst investments for an IT career ever.
I've been in university for the past 3 years and my views on higher education have radically changed from positive to mostly cynical.
This is an extremely polarizing topic, some say "your college is shite", "#notall", "you complain too much", and to all of you I am glad you are happy with your expensive toilet paper and feel like your dick just grew an inch longer, what I'll be talking about is my personal experience and you may make of it what you wish. I'm not addressing the best ivy-league Unis those are a whole other topic, I'll talk about average Unis for average Joes like me.
Higher education has been the golden ticket for countless generations, you know it, your parents believe in it and your grandparents lived it. But things are not like they used to be, higher education is a failing business model that will soon burst, it used to be simple, good grades + good college + nice title = happy life.
Sounds good? Well fuck you because the career paths that still work like that are limited, like less than 4.
The above is specially true in IT where shit moves so fast and furious if you get distracted for just a second you get Paul Walkered out of the Valley; companies don't want you to serve your best anymore, they want grunt work for the most part and grunts with inferiority complex to manage those grunts and ship the rest to India (or Mexico) at best startups hire the best problem solvers they can get because they need quality rather than quantity.
Does Uni prepare you for that? Well...no, the industry changes so much they can't even follow up on what it requires and ends up creating lousy study programs then tells you to invest $200k+ in "your future" for you to sweat your ass off on unproductive tasks to then get out and be struck by jobs that ask for knowledge you hadn't even heard off.
Remember those nights you wasted drawing ER diagrams while that other shmuck followed tutorials on react? Well he's your boss now, but don't worry you will wear your tired eyes, caffeine saturated breath and overweight with pride while holding your empty title, don't get me wrong I've indulged in some rough play too but I have noticed that 3 months giving a project my heart and soul teaches me more than 6 months of painstakingly pleasing professors with big egos.
And the soon to be graduates, my God...you have the ones that are there for the lulz, the nerds that beat their ass off to sustain a scholarship they'll have to pay back with interests and the ones that just hope for the best. The last two of the list are the ones I really feel bad for, the nerds will beat themselves over and over to comply with teacher demands not noticing they are about to graduate still versioning on .zip and drive, the latter feel something's wrong but they have no chances if there isn't a teacher to mentor them.
And what pisses me off even more is the typical answers to these issues "you NEED the title" and "you need to be self taught". First of all bitch how many times have we heard, seen and experienced the rejection for being overqualified? The market is saturated with titles, so much so they have become meaningless, IT companies now hire on an experience, economical and likeability basis. Worse, you tell me I need to be self taught, fucker I've been self taught for years why would I travel 10km a day for you to give me 0 new insights, slacking in my face or do what my dog does when I program (stare at me) and that's just on the days you decide to attend!
But not everything is bad, college does give you three things: networking, some good teachers and expensive dead tree remnants, is it worth the price tag, not really, not if you don't need it.
My broken family is not one of resources and even tho I had an 80% scholarship at the second best uni of my country I decided I didn't need the 10+ year debt for not sleeping 4 years, I decided to go to the 3rd in the list which is state funded; as for that decision it worked out as I'm paying most of everything now and through my BS I've noticed all of the above, I've visited 4 universities in my country and 4 abroad and even tho they have better everything abroad it still doesn't justify some of the prices.
If you don't feel like I do and you are happy, I'm happy for you. My rant is about my personal experience which is kind of in the context of IT higher education in the last ~8 years.
Just letting some steam off and not regretting most of my decisions.
15 -
For my school coursework, we have to create a search facility, now the problem is my class weren't taught this. So 3 sleepless nights and with basically no knowledge of Javascript, I create it. Now, I like my classmates so I don't want them to fail, so I distributed it to them with clear instructions and told my teacher that I'd done this. They asked for my help anytime it crashed but no-one said thanks, they just treated me like an easy route to a pass. I went onto my school private development forums and it turned out my teacher had created a tag for me called 'Unsung Hero' and made a UH appreciation thread that I could read but others could only type their own post. People in my class were praising me for what I'd done and how much I helped. I understand why I do development and why I'll never stop.9
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!rant
A wild "Using this website in incognito mode requires a paid subscription" blocking div appears
Normal people: okay... *proceeds to exit incognito mode*
Developers: huh.. Bitch please.. *inspect element, hide blocking div. Select html tag, remove "overflow: hidden". Profit*
Why would anyone want to block surfing incognito anyway? They should be encouraging it actually..
PS:, While writing this, wondering if content for subscribed users is also locked this way.. Now that would be hilarious.4 -
What the fuck Apple, I thought selling a monitor stand separately at £999 was bad, £360 for putting fucking wheels on your Mac Pro, fuck me.
I had no fucking clue how to tag this, hence why it’s got 3 categories to it
11 -
Oh man. Mine are the REASON why people dislike PHP.
Biggest Concern: Intranet application for 3 staff members that allows them to set the admin data for an application that our userbase utilizes. Everything was fucking horrible, 300+ php files of spaghetti that did not escape user input, did not handle proper redirects, bad algo big O shit and then some. My pain point? I was testing some functionality when upon clicking 3 random check boxes you would get an error message that reads something like this "hi <SENSITIVE USERNAME DATA> you are attempting to use <SERVER IP ADDRESS> using <PASSWORD> but something went wrong! Call <OLD DEVELOPER's PHONE NUMBER> to provide him this <ERROR CODE>"
I panicked, closed that shit and rewrote it in an afternoon, that fucking retard had a tendency to use over 400 files of php for the simplest of fucking things.
Another one, that still baffles me and the other dev (an employee that has been there since the dawn of time) we have this massive application that we just can't rewrite due to time constraints. there is one file with (shit you not) a php include function that when you reach the file it is including it is just......a php closing tag. Removing it breaks down the application. This one is over 6000 files (I know) and we cannot understand what in the love of Lerdorf and baby Torvalds is happening.
From a previous job we had this massive in-house Javascript "framework" for ajax shit that for whatever reason unknown to me had a bunch of function and object names prefixed with "hotDog<rest of the function name>", this was used by two applications. One still in classic ASP and the other in php version 4.something
Legacy apps written in Apache Velocity, which in itself is not that bad, but I, even as a PHP developer, do not EVER mix views with logic. I like my shit separated AF thank you very much.
A large mobile application that interfaced with fucking everything via webviews. Shit was absolutley fucking disgusting, and I felt we were cheating our users.
A rails app with 1000 controller methods.
An express app with 1000 router methods with callbacks instead of async await even though async await was already a thing.
ultraFuckingLarge Delphi project with really no consideration for best practices. I, to this day enjoy Object Pascal, but the way in which people do delphi can scare me.
ASP.NET Application in wich there seemed to be a large portion of bolted in self made ioc framework from the lead dev, absolute shitfest, homie refused to use an actual ioc framework for it, they did pay the price after I left.
My own projects when I have to maintain them.9 -
A few years back I worked at a company as their front-end web developer with one other guy who was their "back-end" developer. PHP and MySQL specifically. He was eventually fired and I took over both development roles. When I got around to seeing his source code and the way he had created the databases, I immediately saw why he was fired. This guy did not understand the concept of loops. Instead of separating out tags and categories with a split / loop, he set up database tables for EVERY. SINGLE. TAG.
i.e. tag_1, tag_2, tag_3, etc. And then to top ot off, instead of looping through the tables, he set up huge conditioks for EVER.LY. SINGLE. TAG.
i.e. if(tag_1) else(tag_2) else(tag_3) etc.
That fucking guy...6 -
LONG RANT ALERT, no TL;DR
* Writes an email to colleague about why I can't create a page on our CMS without at least a H1 title. She wants to me to put up an image with text on it (like a flyer), for multiple reasons, I say I need a textless image. *
30 minutes later:
* Casually plans a frontend optimization project, by looking at files on the CMS, in order to make further development easier and less time-taking*
*** EMAIL NOTIFICATION ***
* clicks *
"Hello, this is [Graphic designer] from the company who created the image with text on it. I do not understand why you can't put display:none on your <h1> tag. Also, being a web company, we are used to making themes and my solution of display:none will work. It's pityful to work on a design only to have it stripped out from most of its concept. If you can't do that, do tell me what resolution you need."
My first reaction:
"Dear [Graphic designer], I am managing our corporate identity, our backend and frontend codebase, I am a graphic designer myself, and am also SEO-aware. For at least 8 reasons (redacted, 'cuse too long), I will need an image without text. As told to my colleagues, I need a 72/96 DPI 16:9 ratio image, 1920x1080 is a good start but may be bigger. Also, looking at the image, it'll have to be in JPG, at 100% quality, exported for the web. Our database software will optimize the image by itself."
Reasons are about SEO issues, responsiveness issues, CMS tools issues, backend and frontend issues.
Instead, I sent following email "We can't. Image please."
I mean seriously. A bit of clarity for you:
In my company, nobody has the slightest idea what I do. They don't understand how a computer works (we all know it works by magic, right?). So of course, when one thinks what we don't know, we know it better than the one who knows, my colleague thought our CMS was like a word document, and began telling me how I should display her bible-length text-infected image, by using some inline css styling display:none.
I tell her "nope, because of my 8 reasons". She transmits that to the agency who's done the visual, now I have this [Graphic designer] not understanding that there are other CMSs than Wordpress on the web, and she tells me, me being one of the most aware on this CMS we have, how I should optimize my site?
Fucking shit, she connects on our CMS for 1 second and she'll get cancer since it's so bad. I'm in the process of planning a whole new rewrite so the website is well designed (currently I am modifying a base theme made by an incompetent designer). I know the system by heart and I know what you can, or can't do.
Now I just received an answer: "so it's only a pure technical problem". NO, OUR WEBSITE WAS CODED BY A CHIMPANZEE WHO THOUGHT WEB DEV WAS AS EASY AS WRITING "HELLO WORLD" ON A SHITTY CMS THAT FORCES DEV USERS TO USE A FUCKING CUM-WHITE-THEMED EDITOR TO EDIT THE WHOLE SITE!!!
I can't just sneeze and "oh look, it's working!"1 -
"Why is this style not appearing in the browser??? All is perfectly written! No missing semicolon."
*staring 5 minutues at HTML source*
"Oh there you go: I put two times class="..." in the same tag..."1 -
Do you have a ‘Drama Queen’ on your team?
This happened last week.
DK = Drama Queen
DK: “OMG..the link to the document isn’t working! All I get is page not found. I’m supposed to update the notes for this project…and now I can’t! What the _bleep_ and I supposed to do now?!...I don’t understand how …”
This goes on for it seems 5 minutes.
Me: “Hold on...someone probably accidently mistyped the file name or something. I’m sure the document is still there.”
DK: “Well, I’ll never find it. Our intranet is a mess. I’m going to have to tell the PM that the project is delayed now and there is nothing I can do about it because our intranet is such a mess.”
Me: “Maybe, but why don’t you open up the file and see where the reference is?”
DK: “Oh, _bleep_ no…it is HTML…I don’t know anything about HTML. If the company expects me to know HTML, I’m going to have to tell the PM the project is delayed until I take all the courses on W3-Schools.”
Me: “Um…you’ve been developing as long as I have and you have a couple of blogs. You know what an anchor tag is. I don’t think you have to take all those W3 courses. It’s an anchor tag with a wrong HREF, pretty easy to find and fix”
DK: “Umm…I know *my* blog…not this intranet mess. Did you take all the courses on W3-Schools? Do you understand all the latest web html standards?”
Me: “No, but I don’t think W3 has anything to do the problem. Pretty sure I can figure it out.”
DK: “ha ha…’figuring it out’. I have to know every detail on how the intranet works. What about the javascript? Those intranet html files probably have javascript. I can’t make any changes until I know I won’t break anything. _bleep_! Now I have to learn javascript! This C# project will never get done. The PM is going to be _bleep_issed! Great..and I’ll probably have to work weekends to catch up!”
While he is ranting…I open up the html file, locate the misspelling, fix it, save it..
Me: “Hey..it’s fixed. Looks like Karl accidently added a space in the file name. No big deal.”
DK:”What!!! How did you…uh…I don’t understand…how did you know what the file name was? What if you changed something that broke the page? How did you know it was the correct file? I would not change anything unless I understood every detail. You’re gonna’ get fired.”
Me: “Well, it’s done. Move on.”9 -
On my first week in the internship, I have to create a small website and it has to be finished ASAP. So I used Bootstrap.
After finishing I tested the website in chrome debugger tools for every screen size (design responsiveness), it was working fine. My stupidity was that I haven't tested on actual mobile/tablet.
The site was live, I send the link to one of my friends and he said "why everything is so small? looks like I'm browsing on PC". I quickly grab my phone and visited the site and it was not responsive on mobile. Started to check the code again, tested again on chrome tools it was working. But not on mobile. Changed the bootstrap file but no fucking changes on mobile.
After few moments of thinking, I realized that I haven't included the "meta viewport" tag. I felt so stupid and it was kind of embarrassing for me.
Now I first include meta tags before working on new project.5 -
Diary of an insane lead dev: day 447
pdf thumbnails that the app generates are now in S3 instead of saved on disk.
when they were on disk, we would read them from disk into a stream and then create a stream response to the client that would then render the stream in the UI (hey, I didn't write it, I just had to support it)
one of my lazy ass junior devs jumps on modifying it before I can; his solution is to retrieve the file from the cloud now, convert the stream into a base64 encoded string, and then shove that string into an already bloated viewmodel coming from the server to be rendered in the UI.
i'm like "why on earth are you doing that? did you even test the result of this and notice that rendering those thumbnails now takes 3 times as long???"
jr: "I mean, it works doesn't it?"
seriously, if the image file is already hosted on the cloud, and you can programmatically determine its URL, why wouldn't you just throw that in the src attribute in your html tag and call it a day? why would you possibly think that the extra overhead of retrieving and converting the file before passing it off to the UI in an even larger payload than before would result in a good user experience for the client???
it took me all of 30 seconds to google and find out that AWS SDK has a method to GetPreSignedURL on a private file uploaded to s3 and you can set when it expires, and the application is dead at the end of the year.
JFC. I hate trying to reason with these fuckheads by saying "you are paid for you brain, fucking USE IT" because, clearly these code monkeys do not have brains.3 -
Damnit...
I'm kind of a perfectionist, which is one of the reasons why I don't post here very often.
I think that my posts have to be the most hilarious or creative ones to even be bothered to be read by anyone.
Now.. I'm kind of not sober, so I'll just write some idéas, jokes and rants in notes on my iPad.. Sleep, and get drunk again tomorrow and maybe post them...
Or maybe just delete this post and be ashamed tomorrow?
I at least posted this under the "Joke/Meme" tag so that people won't be offended, hopefully, by this "none-rant".5 -
!rant
PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT:
For AI, in particular Deep Learning developers, practitioners, hobbyists and otherwise people interested in the field.
If you go into the Pytorch website, click on resources and scroll down you will see a link to "Deep Learning with Pytorch" by Manning publications. This will give you access to the book, a book that if memory serves me well costs about 40+ in printing and the online book format is about 29 (again, if memory serves well)
The book is currently FREE and it does not ask you for an email address, you can just tell them why you want it for and they will give you the free pdf download.
I don't know how good the book is, but have found Manning to publish really good resources.
Do with this information what you want.
And yes, I am leaving the rant tag, so that more people can see this and take advantage of the opportunity in case of being interested and not having the money to purchase the book after the promotion is done and over with. Fuck you about tags and shit.10 -
I just spent almost a semester's worth of money on a certification course. I know it'll help me make more in the long-run and get me out of the job that has started to cause me to become actually depressed, but this price-tag is depressing me. Why are certs so damn pricey???2
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Why mac lovers compare their Mac pro or Mac air with a 300$ windows laptop? Can't you compare it with the same price tag windows laptop?
Because what you are doing is like comparing a Mercedes S500 to Toyota corolla!5 -
Why do some Devs feel the need to over complicate code to make themselves seem smarter?
No, we don't need a wrapper for a <p> tag that builds a normal <p> tag with a message your provide.
Use a normal tag! /facepalm4 -
FRIDAY MADNESS:
As I was so busy coding, one colleague was taking a break and distracts me as he's done with his task. As he approached, I snobbed.
Him: Dude, did you know that there's a generator for all the images in sprite?
Me: really? How?
Him: spritegen.website-performance.org. What's cool about it is that the html and css are already generated just like in font awesome. For example, that i tag...
Me: cool. I wonder dude, why would they use i tag when it makes the text italicize, right?
Him: right. Probably because its used for icons also because icons starts with letter i.
Me: LOL.
Him: LOL. -
Project manager, who i've complained in the past is neglecting critical things that he doesn't want to do, decided today to cancel our weekly planning meeting, to have the below conversation with me 1:1. Its very long, but anyone who has the will to get through it ... please tell me it's not just me. I'm so bewildered and angry.
Side note: His solution to the planning meeting not taking place ... to just not have one and asked everyone to figure it out themselves offline, with no guidance on priorities.
Conversation:
PM: I need to talk to you about some of phrasing you use during collaboration. It's coming across slightly offensive, or angry or something like that.
Me: ok, can you give me an example?
PM: The ticket I opened yesterday, where you closed it with a comment something along the lines of "as discussed several times before, this is an issue with library X, can't be fixed until Y ...".
"As discussed several times" comes across aggressive.
Me: Ok, fair enough, I get quite frustrated when we are under a crunch, working long hours, and I have to keep debugging or responding to the same tickets over and over. I mean, like we do need to solve this problem, I don't think its fair that we just keep ignoring this.
PM: See this is the problem, you never told me.
Me: ... told you what?
PM: That this is a known issue and not to test it.
Me: ..... i'm sorry ..... I did, that was the comment, this is the 4th ticket i've closed about it.
PM: Right but when you sent me this app, you never said "don't test this".
Me: But I told you that, the last 3 times that it won't be in until feature X, which you know is next month.
PM: No, you need to tell me on each internal release what not to test.
Me: But we release multiple times per week internally. Do you really need me to write a big list of "still broken, still broken, still broken, still broken"?
PM: Yes, how else will I know?
Me: This is documented, the last QA contractor we had work for us, wrote a lot of this down. Its in other tickets that are still open, or notes on test cases etc. You were tagged in all of these too. Can you not read those? and not test them unless I say I've fixed them?
PM: No, i'm only filling for QA until we hire a full time. Thats QA's job to read those and maintain those documents.
Me: So you want me to document for you every single release, whats already documented in a different place?
PM: ok we'll come back to this. Speaking of hiring QA. You left a comment on the excel spreadsheet questioning my decision, publicly, thats not ok.
Me: When I asked why my top pick was rejected?
PM: Yes. Its great that you are involved in this, but I have to work closely with this person and I said no, is that not enough?
Me: Well you asked me to participate, reviewing resumes's and interviewing people. And I also have to work extremely close with this person.
PM: Are you doubting my ability to interview or filter people?
Me: ..... well a little bit yeah. You asked me to interview your top pick after you interviewed her and thought she was great. She was very under qualified. And the second resume you picked was missing 50% of the requirements we asked for ... given those two didn't go well, I do think its fair to ask why my top pick was rejected? ... even just to know the reason?
PM: Could you not have asked publicly? face to face?
Me: you tagged me on a google sheet, asking me to review a resume, and rather than tag you back on 2 rows below ... you want me to wait 4 days to ask you at our next face to face? (which you just cancelled for this meeting)
PM: That would have been more appropriate
Me: ..... i'm sorry, i don't want to be rude but thats ridiculous and very nit pick-y. You asked my opinion on one row, I asked yours on another. To say theres anything wrong with that is ridiculous
PM: Well we are going to call another team meeting and discuss all this face to face then, because this isn't working. We need to jump to this other call now, lets leave it here.5 -
I'm feeling like writing this down...
So today I got told off by my boss. Why? Because my job bores me.
My current title, "webmaster", is quite similar to "plumber" where I work. I fix holes on our websites, and I tell "qualified" people (external providers) how a project should be made. Nothing exciting, nothing creative, boring.
So I got told off today for being "laid-back" in a newsletter project (GDPR, looking at you) and not being thorough in my procedures of testing and configuration. Fair enough, I didn't care and I admitted it. It's a boring drag-and-drop done in literally 5 minutes, there's no added brain-value here. Plus I got told off by my IT Manager because our Exchange server would not let me receive test emails. Still doesn't work after a day. Yay.
Then she said "we're doing exciting things here, it's not always the case anywhere else you'd work". And I'm like: "really? I love writing code, seeing things coming alive, investigating why things don't run smoothly, writing efficient code (both in performance and in readability)". I hear many friend devs telling me they're doing that and what they do during their "dev-day"... All I'm doing here is "maintenance" (a.k.a boring) stuff that apparently is "exciting". Adding a <script> to handle google tag manager is hell fun, going through compiled CSS and change color values is also thrilling, finding out if a PDF handler application can handle PDF files, re-plugging a computer monitor to make it work...
I think she meant that I'm not at my place here.
Didn't want to tell her that I have no motivation in doing things I don't enjoy making, i.e, my job.
Good thing I have an interview in two weeks2 -
!rant !notrant !confession_maybe? Bit of a read.
Last year, around September (around 8 months into my first job in the industry), I started loosing motivation to be a developer. By then I had consistently dropped out of 3 or 4 courses for my degree (no penalties as it was pretty much within the starting weeks of the each course). I was think that I do not want to do this. It got so bad that I was looking for other jobs and even trade apprenticeships (I am old-ish so chances of that are so bloody low).
I had my mind set. Including not wanting to finish the degree I had started, which only had 1 year as full time to complete.
My missus supported me in my decision making, but she insisted that I finish the degree as the years I spent on it would have been a waste if I don't. So I agreed, with the idea that I will do this part time when I find another job.
Fast forward to New Years and a very spontaneous decisions was made. I resigned from my dev job and we ended up moving away to another city, two weeks later. By this point on I was so certain that I did not want to be in the IT industry. I had not done any dev work (personal projects or learning new technology etc) outside of the job for months. It had been months since I've visited devrant (to be honest it was not even installed on my phone, mainly because I broke my phone and after having it replaced I had not reinstalled a large portion of the apps I used). I had sold my custom built pc thinking that we do not need two PC's (we kind of don't, she's fine with her laptop) which meant no more dev stuff as none of this stuff was set up on my missus pc. I was looking for all kinds of jobs outside of the IT industry, anything really.
But then something happened. And this is that something. I mean this, deverant. I was flicking through the apps list on google play store, and I saw devrant, and I choose to reinstall it. I began reading rants and comments and I am certain that this made me realise why I want to be a developer. Within about 2 weeks of redownloading deverant I was enrolled full time as a uni student fully motivated to earn my degree.
There are bits and pieces left out of the story. I don't regret leaving my first ever dev job and moving away, it does seem drastic but it changed me for the better I believe. I have the experience from that role and I new fresh start so to speak. I think my missus new this was just a phase, although it felt so certain about it.
I am more of a lurker than a ranter or a commenter on this social platform but I felt that I need to share this. Thanks for reading this. Not really sure what to tag this. Has anyone else experienced this before?5 -
I promised a friend to have a look over his dads website to add a small blog. No big deal, I've got it on my drive, can reuse it just need to adapt it to the environment.
I take a look at what I'm working with and I see the most terrifying piece of "Please, take my data" code I could possibly imagine (And I've seen passwords, in plain text in a script tag). I quote "function queryDB(mode, val) {
var query=" ";
if(mode==="findProd")
query="Select * from Products where ProdNam=" +val;
... (same shit for different cases)
sendQuery(query) ;
}
He literally built the query on the client side sent it to a php script (without validation) and inserted it into the database.
You could literally call window.sendQuery with any sql query and get the result printed into the console.
And other than the plain text passwords guy that wasn't some kid someone knew, this was a "Webdesign" Agency.
Now I took the entire thing offline, called my friends dad, explained it to him and try to sort this out. I would not charge a good friends father but that hack will get a quite hefty bill since my hourly rate just tripled.
And the worst thing : If I publicly name that asshole or warn the people in his portfolio I can, according to Google, be sued. (But, and I assume thats vague enough not to count as bad mouthing, if anyone of you has a customer from Rheinland-Pfalz, Germany with a preexisting page, please have a look at the database interface)
I will call that agency tomorrow, ask for a detailed explanation for why they apparently let trained monkeys write their code and anonymously warn everyone in their portfolio about those flaws...
I don't know if I'm cursed or if there are just that many bad devs but it seems that once a year I have to stumble over some "mistakes" that make me question my sanity.4 -
I strongly dislike people who don't even try to gather information by themselves before asking others.
Now, I'm sure ALL of you have seen this, when someone has a problem with their code, printer, etc they ask you or someone else before just Googling the answer. Like ffs, you really think that you're so special that you feel like other people should Google stuff for you, like I need you to understand that you're not special, you're not unique and there's a VERY high chance someone has has the exact problem as you.
The most common question I see on Discord as a whole is "who ping" or "why ping" or something related. Ffs Discord had a fucking button that tells you who pinged you (yes I know that the sender can delete the message, but this is rarely the case and I always check before getting mad)
On a somewhat related note, I never understood why people ask "who are you" especially when they have a name tag or whatever (and double especially if it's online) like what do you expect them to say? Do you want their life story?16 -
So this i quite a big project, hundreds of files everywhere, pages are rendered using multiple files.
This is one of the latest created page, it was made by my boss, and it just give me the creeps.
I REALLY don't know how he always comes up with shit like these.
I just hate having more than 5 closing tags in sequence...
6 -
I know everyone of us got cool desk setup 🙌🏼 Why don't you share it with tag "mydesk" and lets see who got coolest one 😎
5 -
"Pokemon Let's Go" review:
I knew it would be a very easy game, made to transition Pokemon Go players to the core series of games, but this game is just poorly thought out. The multiplayer was obviously an afterthought; there is no split-screen. When the other player goes off-screen, they are lost off camera. Player 2 cannot interact with anything: they cannot talk to people, collect items, or initiate battles (They walk right through Pokemon)
The game is too easy by design. You cannot fight wild Pokemon, so you end up having 6 Pokemon by the beginning of the game all at full health (And everything gets XP when you catch something, so most of your Pokemon will be up to level 6-10 by your first battles) and the opposition will only have one level 3-4 Pokemon.
This trend continues throughout the game.
The map is tiny. You could walk the whole thing in an hour. Even Gameboy Pokemon maps were larger.
I knew this going into it, but it only has gen 1, which means pretty much no Pokemon, and they're the ones that I'm bored of. Every shitty game starts with generation 1 pokemon then ever introduces anything else. I'm sick of pidgeys!
Plus the hefty price tag of $60 just makes this game not worth much, despite the hype they tried to give it. That's probably why they were to secretive about the gameplay before launch: they knew it was bad,6 -
I started programming in the eighth grade, and the reason as to why I continued was my Computer teacher. She was a really strict person who was generally very irritated with our class, but one day I had decided to actually sit down and do the web page she had asked us to make in the lab.
The page was a very simple one, all you had to do was put a title and below it a paragraph and then a subheading as well that was moving around using the marquee tag.
Since no one generally bothered to do it because we were often left unsupervised in the lab, I was the only one who had finished it.
She came back and saw that I had completed it and no one else; in that moment, the teacher whom we had tagged 'Hitler' because of her rude and mean nature, told me that I had done a really good job and was happy with my effort.
That somehow that made me feel like making the best goddamn web page in every lab class thereafter.
Today I have mostly forgotten how to use HTML and CSS, but that whole idea of writing words and making your computer do shit was beautiful.
If I can say today that I know how to code, it is because of her.
One day I hope to tell her this in person and express my absolute gratitude.1 -
Saw this sent into a Discord chat today:
"Warning, look out for a Discord user by the name of "shaian" with the tag #2974. He is going around sending friend requests to random Discord users, and those who accept his friend requests will have their accounts DDoSed and their groups exposed with the members inside it becoming a victim as well. Spread the word and send this to as many discord servers as you can. If you see this user, DO NOT accept his friend request and immediately block him. Discord is currently working on it. SEND THIS TO ALL THE SERVERS YOU ARE IN. This is IMPORTANT: Do not accept a friend request from shaian#2974. He is a hacker.
Tell everyone on your friends list because if somebody on your list adds one of them, they'll be on your list too. They will figure out your personal computer's IP and address, so copy & paste this message where ever you can. He is going around sending friend requests to random discord users, and those who accept his requests will have their accounts and their IP Addresses revealed to him. Spread the word and send this to as many discord servers as you can. If you see this user, DO NOT accept his friend request and immediately block him. Saw this somewhere"
I was so angry I typed up an entire feature-length rant about it (just wanted to share my anger):
"1. Unless they have access to Discord data centres or third-party data centres storing Discord user information I doubt they can obtain the IP just by sending friend requests.
2. Judging by the wording, for example, 'copy & paste this message where ever you can' and 'Spread the word and send this to as many discord servers as you can. If you see this user, DO NOT accept his friend request and immediately block him.' this is most likely BS, prob just someone pissed off at that user and is trying to ruin their reputation etc.. Sentences equivalent to 'spread the word' are literally everywhere in this wall of text.
3. So what if you block the user? You don't even have their user ID, they can change their username and discrim if they want. Also, are you assuming they won't create any alts?
4. Accounts DDoSed? Does the creator of this wall of text even understand what that means? Wouldn't it be more likely that 'shaian' will be DDoSing your computer rather than your Discord account? How would the account even be DDoSed? Does that mean DDoSing Discord's servers themselves?
5. If 'shaian' really had access to Discord's information, they wouldn't need to send friend requests in order to 'DDoS accounts'. Why whould they need to friend you? It doesn't make sense. If they already had access to Discord user IP addresses, they won't even have to interact with the users themselves. Although you could argue that they are trolling and want to get to know the victim first or smth, that would just be inefficient and pointless. If they were DDoSing lots of users it would be a waste of time and resources.
6. The phrase 'Saw this somewhere' at the end just makes it worse. There is absolutely no proof/evidence of any kind provided, let along witnesses.
How do you expect me to believe this copypasta BS scam? This is like that 'Discord will be shutting down' scam a while back.
Why do people even believe this? Do you just blindly follow what others are doing and without thinking, copy and paste random walls of text?
Spreading this false information is pointless and harmful. It only provides benefits to whoever started this whole thing, trying to bring down whoever 'shaian' is.
I don't think people who copy & paste this sort of stuff are ready to use the internet yet.
Would you really believe everything people on the internet tell you?
You would probably say 'no'.
Then why copy & paste this? Do you have a reason?
Or is it 'just because of 'spread the word''?
I'm just sick of seeing people reposting this sort of stuff
People who send this are probably like the people who click 'Yes' to allow an app to make changes in the User Account Control window without reading the information about the publisher's certificate, or the people who click 'Agree' without actually reading the terms and conditions."8 -
I had to use XSS (cross site scripting) and tag injection to change one tiny CSS property on a bug tracker site where I have no actual file access and can only add custom footer text. Why not just give me file access, or at least some way to customise the CSS, you stupid thing!2
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!rant is a logic operator, right? As in NOT rant. So why do I so often see them on actual rants?
And for that matter, who cares? If there's a [Read More] tag, you'll click if you want, regardless.
Why is this a thing?8 -
Boss: “Our ecommerce conversions in Google Analytics are less than the actual pace of orders.”
Me: “Nothing has changed in the tracking code or setup. It must be our goals setup which you have to have a Ph.D. to understand, plus whatever mood Google’s algorithms are in today.”
He’s not mad at me. We’re both just confused why Google AdWords, Analytics, and Tag Manager have to be so damn hard to get right. I’ve never been able to do it right. And most data is thrown out because people browse websites while logged into their Google Account, which makes their clickstream disappear and become unattributable because of understandable privacy policies. I don’t want my data tracked when I’m logged in either!
So now we have had to hire specialists at several thousand dollars per month to figure this out. -
well... I decided to build my own network for my home lab and then I head out to go shopping.
I went for a router and I told this guy what I wanted
a good router that could allow me access the internet when I want over my phones hotspot or supports USB tethering.
guess what? this blessed guy sells me a router locked to optus. I saw the "yes optus" tag but I was so fucking stupid and clueless.
why? I was just too fucking stupid to trust a fellow Nigerian by telling him I have no idea of networking and how routers work.
the router ? netgear n300 dgn2200
did it have the features I wanted at least ? no
he refused to collect it back and I sold something very dear to me to be able to buy that crap. I thought I could solve all my networking issues at once.
fuck these people, bad government bad people.
I'm done crying over it though.
any ideas on how to go around this?
I've been looking and looking for the past two days, for a less destructive option.3 -
Hate to admit but I am really not feeling react thus far... a function to output an H1 tag that takes many times longer than just creating an H1 tag... why?4
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A) "Why did you do that?"
B)<typing>
A) "Hello? I'm talking to you..."
B) "Sorry, i missed to tag this Commit. please see the commit history for your questions. That's why i use the DVCS.1 -
Why do game studios force social/multiplayer in single player games?
Single player sandbox? How about we make it a multiplayer co-op?
Just fine 1 on 1 brawl? Hey how about you find a team and tag team? No? Too bad fuck you, no points to you for a whole fucking season.
Ugh.15 -
I (junior dev) hate it when my boss tells me to do things that totally don't make sense...
I'm managing an internal site which requires a login to access. Why the hell should I change every damn article in the cms, so robots meta tag is set to no index. It's behind a fucking login and Google won't be able to index it! (except the login of course)
...
I did it anyway.2 -
When you accidentally forget the wk98 tag as well as the time it happened...
Thank you guys for caring about the anime I lost. Love this community2 -
Is it OK to punch a game dev who codes stupid numeric bugs?
So my wife got into Stardew Valley, that admittedly awesome comfort game farming simulator.
She went pretty far in the game, and found some item that was supposed to highly increase the damage she could inflict onto cute little monster thingies.
It didn't work as intended.
Since equipping the piece of shit all her hits did 0 damage. She tossed the item away but the problem persisted. And on and on...
She took to the googles to try and find some explanation, and apparently that is a fairly common bug for mobile devs.
Then she called in the big guns (that is how I'm calling myself in this case, you will see why).
Apparently there is some buggy piece of shitcode somewhere in the game with a numerical insecure routine that overflows the attack modifier. I.e. if it was supposed to increase from 1.990 to 2.010, it actually went all the way down to -0.4.
She was lucky her attacks weren't increasing the monsters' HP.
We found a forum post where some dude said that he managed to edit the game save file and reset the negative-value attack increase modifier variable. Seems easy enough at first, but my wife uses iOS. Nothing is ever so straightforward with apple stuff.
We did get to the save file, she emailed it to me (the file has no extension and no line breaks in it, so we facepalm'd on a couple attempts at editing it directly).
I finally manage to get it into my personal 11-yo laptop... that won't open a single line file that big.
Cue the python terminal. Easy enough to read the file into a string var and search for the buggy XML tag. Edit the value and overwrite into a new file. Send it back to her by email. Figure out how to overwrite the file in iOS.
Some tense moments while the game reloads... and it works!!!! Got some serious hubby goodwill points here.
Srsly, this troubleshoot process is not for technophobes. It is out of reach to pretty much every non-techy user.
And now back to the original question: If I ever manage to find the kid who coded a game-breaking numerically unsafe routine and shipped it as if every test in the planet had waved it bye-bye, can I punch them? Or maybe buy them a beer, let's see how I get to cash that hubby goodwill tonight :)7 -
Me: *opens devTools*
Firefox: yea bro lemme just ..uh.. hmm yeah so this is the css for the element, see?
Me: Thanks.
Me:
Me: this makes no sense, why would I ever do that?
Firefox: also you can't have width on an anchor tag. I can't put that rule into effect
Me: I didn't put any width on your inline element, you sure about that?
Firefox: yea try using display: inline-block
Me: No. I'll just delete that. *checks file*
Me: Maybe that line is wrong because IT DOES NOT FUCKING EXIST!
What is this shit? I just restarted you! What else do you need, a reinstall? Drink too much over the holidays?
It's like the css editor has become a shallow tray with rules on it, and as soon as you bump it a little everything spills over and then Firefox just thinks oops, I've got this font-size: 200% lying around, lemme stick this into the hr tag which makes sense because THERE CAN'T BE ANY TEXT IN IT.
9 -
What a week... I feel like I am on here ranting more than usual.
The Marketing Director and Project Manager keep telling me to let them know when I am stuck on tasks so they can unblock for me, but I FUCKING DO. I don't understand why they keep telling me to speak up, because I use multiple channels to tell those who are the blockers that I need an update.
I add comments on my Monday.com tickets and @ the relevant people, I send MS Teams chats to them, we even have a daily standup where I mention that I am stuck, as well as a OneNote daily update that gets sent to management where I mention that I am stuck and tag the people who need to help me out.
I have been stuck on a task for two sprints, which should have taken me a couple of days to do.
I really feel like I'm talking to brick walls, am I that unimportant? This is supposed to be "agile scrum kanban blah blah blah sprints story points people over process bullshit". I hate it. Y'all are doing it wrong... Fuckin robots.
I need a fuckin drink, thank God it's Friday.7 -
Well I noticed one thing here.
You write any post regarding coding, bad management, juniors or whatever shit, this community welcomes you
But you dare to put wrong tag or category, all are like where the fuck is report button? can I dislike this post bla bla..
Why so with wrong tag21 -
That moment when you have hundreds of lines of code for your website, then you wanted to add a simple modal which looks great on w3school.
Then you recreate the modal on your site, click the button and nothing happens....
So now, you are spending hours trying to figure out why it's not working, new file to test, tried another modal concept, change the CSS, refresh the page until the F5 button doesn't even work anymore!!!
To find out, there is a extra "." in the href file tag plus the tag is in a id not a class
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So..there is 2 of us working on a Wordpress site, my job is front-end and make it look nice, the other persons job is to do some backend development(dont ask me what and why, I have no idea). Basically, I was waiting for the other person to finish his part so I can do front end development. I was expecting it to be just a theme, and then I fix it, add new stuff, etc etc, like usually..but the horror I saw, THE FUCKING "BACKEND" PERSON HAS ACTUALLY MADE A FUCKING THEME EVEN THOUGH IT IS MY FUCKING JOB. Now dont get me wrong, I wouldnt mind if I did almost zero work and got paid, but..THE FUCKING THEME WAS UGLY AS A TWO HEADED DICK SMOKING A FUCKING CIGARETTE. There was STRONG RED FUCKING EVERYWHERE, padding between posts was basically -20px. Well ok, I could have just started making a new theme, but there was already some stuff in this one we needed so I went it it and tried to make it look nice. And trust me, it is great now, great colors, fonts, shadows, button animations, everything, even looks great on mobile.
I started making some changes to the header, and I noticed that post title changes also..hmm wonder why..So I inspect element and what do I see, TAG OF THE FUCKING POST TITLE IS <HEADER>???? WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK, IF YOU TRIED TO DO SOME FRONT END, AND YOU SAY YOU KNOW SOME, WHY DO FUCKING FUCK WOULD YOU DO THAT???????? WHY THE FUCK WOULD YOU DO MY JOB IF YOU SUCK AT IT??? DONT DO MY FUCKING JOB, I SUCK AT "BACKEND" AND I DONT FUCKING DEAL WITH DATABASES OR TRY TO MAKE THEM FOR YOU!!!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARHHHHHHHH FUCK -
I'm so PISSED OFF because of all the problem fixing I do. Most of the time, I take tutorials which have 6 steps a and 10 lines of code plus some config, and ALWAYS there is a problem somewhere, where it hasn't been covered in the guide. WHAT THE FLAMING FUCK? I literally spend days after days to figure out, that it's a problem with mostly one file/value, and no goddamn guide ever mentions the dependencies, if you don't have the defaults set for somewhat reason. And it's like this with every motherfucking tutorial I do to implement something, and most of the time I do understand what I'm doing, but THAT ONE VALUE/TRICK/FILE/SETTING/XML TAG/CODE TO A NUCLEAR SILO IS NEVER MENTIONED, WHY?!?!5
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Stack Overflow people have profound buffallo bullcrap on their skulls, they are some software engineers who have fucked COBOL and BASIC, probably somewhere like NASA, just pondering out where someone post a question. They're probably some etilist cult banging a prostitute while delivering that awful downvote imitating the slap they give the chick during sex. They desire questions such as
"RANDOM_fuck_module_Abdul.method() not working in python" or "how to dock the dock by undocking" (tagged: AWS). Not things like "why does the audio tag not work in a PC but works in w3school tester?" or a genuine programming question. Fuck.
We don't tail recurse or loop abc for k in godfuck loops, huh? We make simple things as: a form, a http request to dell.
I hope there penises get rotten in the hell. Period.
this is just a part of SO.13 -
What in the actual fuck GitHub?!
Why can't I edit a file direct on the web UI? I was able to this morning! If I can't edit against master then why the fuck is the icon there?!
Also, why did you add the unnecessary step of "add tag" when I am fucking CLEARLY adding a new fucking tag.
8 -
Recently in Instagram followed a tag #coding and #programming.
I get shitty post unrelated to #coding and #programming are you getting that stuff as well?
And why am I getting provocative pictures of lady coders?13 -
Talking about the Open Graph protocol (http://ogp.me/)
Why the fuck does the Facebook Object Debugger tell me that my image in the og:image meta tag could not be loaded when I put a HTTPS link in there, but when there is a HTTP link with a permanent redirect to the HTTPS link it can load the fucking image.2 -
I love this wk108 tag. Have a lot of stories related to it.
For me , my mentors are the reason i am what i am today. In this crazy selfish world where people only want to run faster than the others, having nice helping people around is great.
(Val titanLannister=xx)
(1)class 6-10th, xx is a curious, but poor boy with no desktop/mobile , but still loves cs classes due to various ,caring teachers.
(2) class 11th end,programming for the first time that year, hates programming, one day when everybody goes out for lunch, xx tears down while talking to his cs teacher "why can't i score good marks when i was the best till 10th? Is programming so tough?" . I remember him giving me a little but greatest motivational lecture followed by 40 minutes of the most basic concepts in which i might had asked him a 1000 questions. "You are my chaempion", he used to say😂 (bad accent) . But god, if he hadn't motivated me that day, i swear i would have left all this and go for business. Thank-you, lokesh sir💗💗
First year : tried to go for a competitive learning course. Mann, am not cool in that stuff. Again was about to break (i was among the top scorers in school boards and had designed many small games back then. I should have been good here too, but nah... the other guys were like bullets .)
Oh my, my deepest bow to this amazing teacher SUMEET MALIK (oh sir, you were so good) .
How this guy taught? Well, he first explained the concept. Fo those who understood, he gave them question 'A', for those who didn't, he repated . For those who understood , can do question a again, and those eho did A already gets an even advance question B. And this cycle went on until the weakest student(usually me) understood the concept.
And no, it never happened even once that class finished with even a single child not doing all questions he gave.he used to teach very less concepts each class and would go to everybody's desk to check they understood the concept, the question, its working, weather we implemented or not and weather our implementation is correct or not +our doubts. Hell , i even took doubts with him for hours after the class and he always just smiled💗(oh sir, am so sorry for being so dumb)
Real Doubt classes, doubts on whatsApp, revision assignments , tests , competitions,... damn, i haven't seen a teacher with this much dedication. At one point of time, that institution was famous for our Sumeet sir's classes 😂
Then last year, i got another mentor . Harshit bhiya. The guy is awesome, and a little extra swaggy 😂. He got a lot of chill, with his big AAD badge, a bag full of stickers and his every day association with people at udacity and google. As always i tried to overwhelm him with my ton of doubts in class, but he use to just give me a few pointers/links, after which i was like quiet for the complete session😂. He gave me a lot to think/work upon and i got a kind of career to work on.
I also think of mentioning a fucked up depressing-bot assholic friend of mine, but he don't deserve to be in this list of my best people. Just fuck you mann with a blockchain of dicks, if you are reading this.1 -
I'm starting to FUCKing hate those 1-5 lines minified 3rdparty javascript snippets that everyone seems to be bombarding their website with.
Why on gods ungodly earth would you ever dream of injecting this kind of style into my <head> tag.
Without any warning whatsoever.
You couldn't be FUCKing bothered to be thinking about the consequences, before pushing such an update to your production server.
That's how you leave your users website broken, or ugly af.
I know it's an easy fix, simply remove the snippet that injects this crap, if only I was allowed to say "no don't keep this FUCKing crap" to the customer.
2 -
Git Commit Part 3:
28d48b0 This is why the cat shouldn't sit on my keyboard.
95df68f I must enjoy torturing myself
c5acfc2 Fix my stupidness
3a57702 I hate this fucking language.
6cb212a Too tired to write descriptive message
292b1e2 That last commit message about silly mistakes pales in comparision to this one
f4a091f Does not work.
5af1ca1 small is a real HTML tag, who knew.
e7d2d84 Best commit ever
f54d32b de-misunderestimating
f587ca1 Added translation.
352e29c Future self, please forgive me and don't hit me with the baseball bat again!
54403a6 Now added delete for real
9f42f38 Who knows...
5df8457 more ignored words
56bd0ef Added missing file in previous commit1 -
I have good knowledge frontend/backend web development but i didnt know php cause i heard so much shit about it. I finally made up my mind to learn it.
I fucking hate php
>>> MAMP doesnt fucking work when i installed it
>>> After it finally works, I change the sql password. WHY THE FUCK DO I NEED TO GO TO LIKE 10 FILES AND CHANGE THE GODDAMN PASSWORD IN EACH ONE.
>>> php doesnt work if the <?php tag isnt at the top -> this shit wasnt even mentioned
>>> why the fuck would you use '->' for everything when a simple '.' would suffice.
>>> useless class system (more like a pseudo class system)
>>> foreach ($list as $item) dafuq that is not even correct english, what is wrong in "foreach ($item in $list)"
i hate php10 -
Does anyone else have a boss who is supposed to have a lot of technical but you have to explain everything like your talking to a newbie that can't seem to follow logical arguments?
Tag: I already proved it's not... Why do you still think it is1 -
Today I asked a question on RPG stackexchange, I made some typos, didnt format it nicely, added a wrong tag.
Within a minute I had 10 upvotes and an answer, people formatted my question and people improving the answer.
I was so surprised that people actually where nice. StackOverflow is one of the few stackexchanges that really sucks...
Why are devs such jerks?2 -
<!doctype confusedRant 😕>
Plot: we need to release our website in two weeks which holds at least a thousand pages. All these pages are manually migrated from the old website, which doesn't have a database. Current status: 650 pages/1000 are completed, 40 different templates need to be adapted. I'm alone on these templates, my colleagues create the pages and fill the new database
So I'm working on the templates a WebDev coded for our website on a licensed CMS, and had this decently simple html block that looks like a square and consisting of roughly this (Emmet style):
a.area > blockquote > strong.title + p
After adding another <a> element inside the p, I noticed that my <a> wouldn't display and bust the whole look of the square.
Just for more details, the CSS the dev made is ultra specified (meaning each element is too precisely "described" : div.class .child .child2 { /* styles */ } when it could be .class .child2 for example). Also, the templates he made need to be compatible with any "module" the website has, thus the need of this high specificity
So I fired up the DevTools to check what happened, and had:
Expected: a.area > blockquote > strong.title + p > a
Actual result: some new a.area were wrapping the <strong>, the <p> and the <a> I just added. The source code was not showing any of this but just the rules I initially wrote - the expected result
Wtf?! I thought the JS the dev made was adding elements. I disabled said JS, and bam, these a.area were still wrapping everything!! What black magic would add these stupid tags I never asked for.
So I went looking in the CSS files in case some wizardry was happening, but everything was OK.
I tried changing my structure, changing tag (swapping a.area to p.area or without .area), HTML just said "nope, have those please".
Eventually I rewrote my own module out of frustration after three quarters of an hour fiddling with this stupid "module". I hate losing time for such shenanigans and under a lot of pressure because of deadlines.
Still haven't figured why those <element>.area would wrap everything out of nowhere...3 -
This story happened to everyone, and i am sure that if i search, i will find dozens of similar stories, but the different here is, i tried, i really tried, in a hundred different ways to achieve my goal !
When you are stuck on a problem, let's say, that you have a program, project, website ... and need to achieve something technically weird (or hard) and need some help to save you time on experimentations. The first thing a lot of people do is : Google.com && put search dorks.
But, at a moment, google gets "dirty", you use it so often that he always think to know better then you what you are looking for.
It reminds of "Ted", the movie (for thows who know it) where they asked : "Hey ! Why does google always suggest us to look for black dicks ??"
It is exactly what happened to me, i got results who doesn't have anything to do with what i was looking for !
You can give it a try now : type "semantic web RDF to RDB"
You won't find anything, except results related to : NOSQL DBs, which is totally annoying.
Something else, i once google swift to get some updates, what results did i got ? Taylor Swift ... (musician)
I often get 2 or 3 results from google, which made me thinking that i somewhat reached the end of internet, or that people are so dumb that i will have spend hours trying to figure my solutions, but, before doing that, other solutions had to be tested.
1- TOR : Google tracks his users and uses its algos and bullshits to return results as close as possible to the user's demand (big fail ...) so how about moving to a different country ? DL TOR browser, open, setup, go to US, open google (got us version YAY !) enter my keywords, and, nothing, still nothing, more results for sure, but nothing related to what i was looking for.
2- VM
Pop a VM, launch TOR, use Hidden mode, delet all cookies and stuff (it is a new VM but who knows).
Use keywords (now in UK). Here they are !! my results !!! i finally found some decent results about my keywords !
But, i have the required knowledge to do this kind of stuff, but how about people who rely heavily on google ? they can't change country, clear everything, trick google to think you are a new user, they have almost biased and flawed results. I tried duckduckgo (i love them) but they are not that efficient.
Google says not to anything evil, but they ARE EVIL, miss guiding people, suggesting corrections who have nothing to do with the keywords, or results totally unrelated in any way to the keywords while results exist in other countries ???
Ever since, i don't pay attention to google at all, and started thinking that google's algos are manipulating people, i don't know if it is done on purpose or not, but the result is the same, people have biased results based on their country, on their tag, on their ID, and the recent keywords.
During that period i was cursing google every funcking day, and i am still doing it, too much trackers, too much manipulation, i will end-up enclosing myself in darknet.4 -
rentRant
Simply rent a high rated rant and feel awesome at least once in life (and get free swag). Don't miss this opportunity!
Only 13.37 a month! Order cow!3 -
I must assume that whoever designed jinja2 was either on crack, or hadn’t used template systems before. This thing is too fucking complicated, and doesn’t make sense. From their docs:
“Jinja2 supports dynamic inheritance and does not distinguish between parent and child template as long as no extends tag is visited. While this leads to the surprising behavior that everything before the first extends tag including whitespace is printed out instead of being ignored, it can be used for a neat trick.”
My response: “I don’t give a fuck!! I need this fucking website to be fucking done already! I pass data into a fucking template engine, and the engine applies my fucking markdown!! This is bullshit!! Why am I still trying to understand your fucking nonsense?!? AGGJCDJVFD&@!?&@$?)@&!SHHHVBSHK!!!!!!”
*desk flip*
Fuck you to hell you jinja fucker3 -
So another story of our stupid trainee, this fucker talks to a customer while i was comming back from my lunch break. He aks me if i can tell him how to fix the problem of the customer. I walk over to his place and look at the error message. It says: "Tag: customer_country is missing. Needed by supplier". Sometimes i wonder why this dude is even here.
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Wanted to make a script for batch downloading lyrics for the mp3s on my phone
✔️Read ID3 tags to get title and artist
✔️Scrap a lyrics website
✔️Add a USLT frame to store lyrics within
✔️Lyrics show up on Clementine/Amarok/Whatever
❌Lyrics show up on my phone stock music player
Why the ffffffuuuuuuck!!! As if the ID3 lyrics tag were documented enough, now my phone gets picky and can't find them...1 -
Trying to setup a fucking google tag manager to get the fucking google analytics working.
Few years ago it was a 10 minutes work. Now I'm already at 4 hours. Fucking sick
WHY I say why I have two fucking equals accounts, FUCKING THE SAME.
And one is working the other one doesn't give a shit about my analytics.
Ehi, Tag manager, I just set up a Tag called "YourMother" related with its trigger called "Fuck" using same extra variable called "anal"
Can you just show it in my anal-ytics, fucking please?9 -
Spent a couple of hours trying to figure out why my flexbox css wasn't rendering as suspected. Finally discovered that the html tag I tried to apply it to didn't support display: flex;
Gah.3 -
Friend of mine during workshops yesterday:
F: "Shit, my copying is broken (ctrl c shortcut)"
Me: "stack overflow down and/or broken copy/paste - worst nightmare"
F: "oh it works again... For a moment there i was afraid im gonna loose my job..."
* I guess the comedy of situation doesn't translate well to rant, but still, it was funny * -
I would have needed to smoke enough crack to think that learning a new language was a good idea and then even more to start. As soon as I hit having to learn things I move straight onto black tar heroin.2
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I have lost track of the whys, but I'm writing something that loads a datastructure not unlike specifications of C types (plus struct single inheritance and generics) from any DLL-s tossed in the same folder, then organizes them into a pretty database. Now I just gotta keep gradually broadening the scope until I get to the feature set of the modern C# type system.
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I just loaded a css file with a script tag. And spent 20 minutes wondering why the hell I was getting missing semicolon errors. :/1
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Hey Devranter's from mumbai
Why not we meet somewhere in Mumbai?
Please tag other ranter's in comment Who are from Mumbai.
@Floydian17 -
https://youtu.be/yYUuWWnfRsk
I used to dream of systems which were built into the infrastructure for a variety of reasons
One was I didn’t feel object detection was likely good enough to handle various objects say to stock shelves in warehouse like stores
The other was power
If the stretch works one might wonder how many of them they’d have to employ to schedule them to recharge themselves throughout the day
It’s a shame humans as is can’t be trusted with too much free time given how the boomer generation and before willfully poisoned the minds of so many of their offspring creating this mess
We might have reached a point where life was mostly personal Enrichment and study and exercise and leisure where we all lived over a 100 years had minimal offspring reduced our destructive footprint on the world and well you get the idea
With more people working in closed shops we might have even reached this tech sooner
I wonder how prohibitive the price tag is how fast it runs out of power how destructive it is to non durable goods and the what other faults that have kept us from advancing into the golden age the last time I posted this before way way back now
Or maybe rich perverts don’t want to give up their monopoly of control over other peoples lives once were forced to change our lives economic system to adapt
Issue of course is population size
The replacement to honest labor and ingenuity or making a better world in the USA has been a short cut we commonly call slavery and that creates incentive for them most of evil people to breed continually and sell their children
Population in a time period of extreme leisure under normal circumstance would likely fall off
Humans would want to enjoy endless travel which is another problem if we keep cars that are based off fossil fuel
Much like increased tech has the trade off of increased usage of energy that is dirty like our nuclear plant problem in the USA where many places aren’t even carting their waste to Nevada down the 10 mile tunnel they’re supposed to be
So we’re stuck
Oh well
Hopefully there is reincarnation
Maybe I’ll come back as a cat
People just had to pull their insane shit when I was alive
Why couldn’t it have Ben something Normal like war or occupation or just hardship of some form instead of designed hardship to control good people and pattern bastards into this weird shit I see all around me because they’re both evil and afraid of losing what they have
Doesn’t this seem familiar ?
It should
Just like the competitors to Boston dynamics I’m looking up have been spawned as a result of YouTube presenting me with the same video as part of its algorithm heh
And also be because I mentioned that before6 -
Something like what the optgroup tag does in Excel.
Anybody?
Why is something this simple so hard to find how to make? -
fallacy of a "good child". m:mom/dad s:son/daughter , o: outcome.
counter : 1
m : Son, can you do this thing x for me?
s : yes sure
o : son is good
counter : 2
m : Son, can you do this thing x for me?
s : yes sure, give me 5 mins
after 5 mins...
--case 1 : m is still waiting, s comes and does the work
---o : son is bad since son let m wait
--case 2 : m did half of x and says "just teach me how this part is done, and i will do it on my own". s teaches
---o : son is bad since son didnot do the task
--case 3 : m does the whole x work
---o : son is bad since son did not do the task
counter 3
m : Son, can you do this thing x for me?
case 1)s : why can't you do it yourself? i taught you last time?
--- o : son is bad
case 2) yes give me 5 mins
---o : same as cases of counter 2, i.e all are bad
counter : misc
m : why didn't you do x for me beforehand? why do i need to tell you everytime?
case 1 s : woah! when did you say to do it each day?
--- o1 : son is bad since he cross questioned
case 2 s : oh am sorry, i forgot
--- o2 : son is bad as he intentionally forgets
----
am i not seeing enough politics in the office each day to handle another black tag on me? i sometimes delay a task assigned to me, sometimes want other to just understand and do it on their own. but why does it always end up making me a bad offspring?1 -
At work we use a custom python library to parse XML responses from an internal API to objects. I literally spent half an hour pondering why an if statement was misbehaving. Turns out it parsed <tag>false<\tag> as obj.tag = 'false' instead of the boolean False which obviously made "if obj.tag:" misbehave 😒
-
jinja templates make me look towards html in a whole new light. are we 'inserting' data to an already rendered page? am i really mixing server code with ui ? It doesn't feel so. there are if else and loops being executed for html code, like wtf?
I don't know but everything feels so good. like i was literally hating every piece of website i was writing in php. everytime i wrote <div>....</div> followed by <?php ... ?> followed by another html tag /php tag in a fuckin php file, i wanted to kill someone from w3c.
WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALLOWING THE MIXUP ?WHY IS PHP FILE HOLDING HTM TAGS? WHY?WHY?WHY?
But this... this is beauty. their is separation of concerns. jinja has some big powers, we can loop, repeat, make clauses, inherit other html classes, load html content into blocks, set variables,
but main concepts like file handling, response/request handling,calculations,etc are all being done in separate python files. I know that these jinja templates also might be running python in background, but atleast a developer cannot fuck up that code.
we can be sure that if correct jinja codes are written in html, then it would load correctly. And wherever devs doesn't fuck up, the output is better to understand and more maintainable/scaleable3 -
Man I'm annoyed!
TL;Dr what does it mean "we're trying to reduce options to a minimum", why don't you go closed source!? why don't you remove themes!?
For anyone who uses rofi, they would know that a few months ago an update made it more compliant with the free-desktop spec, that it only uses the first .desktop file for the given Name tag.
I only found out about this recently as I was only able to update Manjaro recently, and it really annoyed me, cause it took me a while to figure out why tons of my desktop entries disappeared.
Turns out someone made an issue about this, and the given answer was: "that's against the spec". Ok, fine. But when I asked if they could add an option to still ignore that aspect of the spec (i.e. --show-duplicated), the response I got was: "going against the spec is a no-go". WHAT!?
There are so many things that have behavior that goes against the spec (ex. gnu-utils), why can't they add an option to do this!? An OPTION!?
When I decided to try (I don't know C yet) and make a PR, the first and last (it got locked afterwards!) comment I got was:
" As explained on #941, this is a no-go. We want to reduce the number of options to the minimum, and non-compliance to a well-defined and widely implemented spec is definitely not something we want."
Why are you so closed minded!? Yes compliance is amazing, but it's not a safety standard, it's okay if you *give an option* to go against the spec!!!!
WHAT THE HECK!?!?!? WHY!?!?!?
Why is a open source project closed to new features that are part if the scope of the project, and require minimal maintenance!?11 -
Dammit! CSS is such a huge pain in the ass. I just want to use a <style> tag inline with a class to control margin positioning of one friggin’ image. (Yes, I know it’s better in a CSS file but this is a temp fix that will be reverted soon.)
<style>
.30-day-seal {
margin-top: -27.5em;
margin-left: 39.5625em;
}
</style>
<img class=“30-day-seal” src=/path/to/img.png”/>
Nothing happens. Only if I use a style=“” attribute directly in the img tag.
I’ve even tried:
<style>
img.30-day-seal {
margin-top: -27.5em;
margin-left: 39.5625em;
}
</style>
And
<style>
.30-day-seal img {
margin-top: -27.5em;
margin-left: 39.5625em;
}
</style>
And even
<style>
img .30-day-seal {
margin-top: -27.5em;
margin-left: 39.5625em;
}
</style>
Why do I suck so bad at this?! Still!?6 -
<script type="text/javascript" src="js/somscript.js"></script>
why is the closing script tag a fucking thing ?????
why would you just do /> ?????51 -
I couldn't find a program for this so I'm making one. Cli based. Have a json object you need to unmarshal in golang? Yeah I was getting tired AF making structs for all of them with the json tag name over and over, so I'm mid way through a python script that generates the structs for you. I'll link it here when I'm done.
And if you're wondering why python? Dynamic object definitions. That's why it's trouble in go in the first place.3 -
okay let's put a platform tag at the end of a gem in the gemfile, because it only works when you don't use the mingw platform on windows:
gem 'eventmachine', platform: :ruby
so far so good. Now lets remove the gemfile.lock and let bundle rebuild the dependency tree again (to make sure nothing gets left there):
bundle install
Resolving Dependencies.....
...
Fetching eventmachine 1.2.7 (x64-mingw32)
...
Why bundle, why?? :(
Now to fix that, i have to:
gem uninstall eventmachine
and:
gem install eventmachine --platform=ruby
every fucking time.4 -
$tag = taxonomy_term_load($tid['tid'])->tid;
And that ladies and gentlemen, is why you do code reviews. -
Did I miss something?
why do I remember img tag <img src=https://test.com> used to include cookies of test.com with samesite flag None from cross-origin.
But now it just don't
I am confused -
!Dev
Fuck people using trace rifles in momentum control. How the hell am I supposed to kill someone who kills me in two rounds and also fires at 1000 rounds per minute. I was trying to get the catalyst aka upgrade for the seasonal weapon which is pretty bad and the upgrade makes it usable but I am getting ripped apart after my first kill because someone can kill me with 2 bullets wherever he shot me.
Yes momentum control is supposed to be a gunfight mode and it comes around rarely but that does not mean a broken weapon can roam around killing anybody in sight before they even know you fired a shot at them from some lane. Shotguns do the same but you need to get close. Shotguns are still a problem but at least you can dodge or counter with a shotgun since your radar tells you someone is nearby and snipers need a headshot. These weapons can fire at your toe and you are dead. Oh the devs knew that such fast firing weapons wil be op and needed their damage and made them use the same ammo as shotguns, sniper and non heavy grenade launchers. However the game mode gives all weapons a damage buff which is enough for trace rifles to be broken. Yes you can use other primaries but what are you gonna do when a auto rifles kills you with two shots to the toe. And since they burn ammo quickly and take more rounds to kill then their counterparts like shotguns which use he same ammo as them they spawn in with 50 in the mag and anybody who is using shotguns snipers or grenade launchers give them ammo and they only need two rounds to kill. Also after I kill 50 PvP opponents I need to kill a few hundred opponents in PVE or PVP to actually apply the upgrade and who you kill does not matter.
Seriously and the second weapon I want to upgrade which is able has tracking but you need to aim down sights after hipfiring the tracking shots
which dl negligible damage so they explode or aim down sights and shoot which deals more damage but I am probably not going to have enough time before some random kills me again.
And this is just the first game. From what I heard it was supposed to be a fun game mode which focused on gunfights with your primary not the infamous laser tag show of Prometheus lens which happened a few years ago but now all trace rifles can do that. Oh and I still need to get 50 kills there for a seasonal challenge so I can get the free version of the premium currency and I can only skip one challenge and I have already skipped one challenge since it requires a dlc K don't own.
Seriously why cant some actual good game come up to challenge this. All the competition seems to be third person shooters. Also most of the guns don't feel good and lore is pretty lacking but lore is not top priority. The only competition is Warframe which is not my style, Titanfall 2 but I get insane pings from here so no multiplayer so after the story nothing to do unless I want to do airtstrafing which is useless since I can't play multiplayer. Granted Titanfall 2 is not a looter shooter but the guns feel good and the movement is too good and Halo 1 - 3 since I heard 4 and 5 are pretty bad and I have only played halo 1. I might complain about jackal snipers in halo 2 but at least they have fixed spawns.
Maybe I am overreacting since it is my first game of momentum control
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