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A is for Assembly, a wizard's spell
B is for Bootstrap, so bland and the same. And also for Brainf*ck, will blow you away
C is for COBOL, your grandad knows that
D is for daemon, your server knows what
E is for Express.js, you node what is coming
F is for FORTRAN, which is perferct for sciencing
G is for GNU which is GNU not UNIX
H is for Haskell using functional units
I is for Intance, An action of Object
J is for Java plays with them Always
K is for Kotlin, Android's new toy
L is for Lisp, scheming a ploy
M is for Matlab, who knows how it works
N is for Node a bloatware of code
O is for Objective Pascal, you did not expect that
P is for programming, we all love to do that
Q is for Queries, A database is made
R is for R, statistics are great
S is for Selenium, you have to test that
S is for Smalltalk, let's make it all brief
T is for Turing Test, how human is this?
U is for Unix, build with all talents
V is for Visual Studio, built with all laments
W is for Web, lets build something cool
X is for XHTML, remember all that?
Y is for Y2K, I'm tired as f*ck
Z is for Zip, let's zip is all now.
Get yourself coffee and back to the grind.8 -
Ok story of my most most recent job search (not sure devRant could handle the load if I was to go through them all)
First a little backstory on why I needed to search for a new job:
Joined a small startup in the blockchain space. They were funded through grants from a non-profit setup by the folks who invented the blockchain and raised funds (they gave those funds out to companies willing to build the various pieces of the network and tools).
We were one of a handful of companies working on the early stages of the network. We built numerous "first"s on the network and spent the majority of our time finding bugs and issues and asking others to fix them so it would become possible, for us to do what we signed up for. We ended up having to build multiple server side applications as middleware to plug massive gaps. All going great, had a lot of success, were told face to face by the foundation not to worry about securing more funds at least for the near term as we were "critical to the success of the network".
1 month later a bug was discovered in our major product, was nasty and we had to take it offline. Nobody lost any funds.
1-2 months later again, the inventor of the blockchain (His majesty, Lord dickhead of cuntinstein) decided to join the foundation as he wasn't happy with the orgs progress and where the network now stood. Immediately says "see that small startup over there ... yeah I hate them. Blackball them from getting anymore money. Use them as an example to others that we are not afraid to cut funds if you fuck up"
Our CEO was informed. He asked for meetings with numerous people, including His royal highness, lord cockbag of never-wrong. The others told our CEO that they didn't agree with the decision, but their hands were tied and they were deeply sorry. Our CEO's pleas with The ghost of Christmas cuntyness, just fell on deaf ears.
CEO broke the news to us, he had 3 weeks of funds left to pay salaries. He'd pay us to keep things going and do whatever we could to reduce server costs, so we could leave everything up long enough for our users to migrate elsewhere. We reduced costs a lot by turning off non essential features, he gave us our last pay check and some great referrals. That was that and we very emotionally closed up shop.
When news got out, we then had to defend ourselves publicly, because the loch ness moron, decided to twist things in his favour. So yeah, AMAZING experience!
So an unemployed and broken man, I did the unthinkable ... I set my linkedin to "open to work". Fuck me every moronic recruiter in a 10,000 mile radius came after me. Didn't matter if I was qualified, didn't matter if I had no experience in that language or type of system, didn't matter if my bio explicitly said "I don't work with X, Y or Z" ... that only made them want me more.
I think I got somewhere around 20 - 30 messages per week, 1 - 2 being actually relevant to what I do. Applied to dozens of jobs myself, only contacted back by 1, who badly fucked up the job description and I wasn't a fit at all.
Got an email from company ABC, who worked on the same blockchain we got kicked off of. They were looking for people with my skills and the skills of one other dev in the preious company. They heard what happened and our CEO gave us a glowing recommendation. They largely offered us the job, but both of us said that we weren't interested in working anywhere near, that kick needing prick, again. We wanted to go elsewhere.
Went back to searching, finding nothing. The other dev got a contract job elsewhere. The guy from ABC message me again to say look, we understand your issues, you got fucked around. We can do out best to promise you'll never have to speak to, the abominable jizz stain, again. We'll also offer you a much bigger role, and a decent salary bump on top of that.
Told them i'd think about it. We ended up having a few more calls where they showed me designs of all the things they wanted to do, and plans on how they would raise money if the same thing was to ever happen to them. Eventually I gave in and signed up.
So far it was absolutely the right call. Haven't had to speak to the scrotum at all. The company is run entirely by engineers. Theres no 14 meetings per week to discuss "where we are" which just involves reading our planning tool tickets, out loud. I'm currently being left alone 99% of the week to get work done. and i'm largely in-charge of everything mobile. It was a fucking hellhole of a trip, but I came out the other side better off
I'm sure there is a thought provoking, meaningful quote I could be writing now about how "things always work out" or that crap. But remembering it all just leaves me with the desire to find him and shove a cactus where the sun don't shine
.... happy job hunting everyone!10 -
Heres the initial upgraded number fingerprinter I talked about in the past and some results and an explanation below.
Note that these are wide black images on ibb, so they appear as a tall thin strip near the top of ibb as if they're part of the website. They practically blend in. Right click the blackstrip and hit 'view image' and then zoom in.
https://ibb.co/26JmZXB
https://ibb.co/LpJpggq
https://ibb.co/Jt2Hsgt
https://ibb.co/hcxrFfV
https://ibb.co/BKZNzng
https://ibb.co/L6BtXZ4
https://ibb.co/yVHZNq4
https://ibb.co/tQXS8Hr
https://paste.ofcode.org/an4LcpkaKr...
Hastebin wouldn't save for some reason so paste.ofcode.org it is.
Not much to look at, but I was thinking I'd maybe mark the columns where gaps occur and do some statistical tests like finding the stds of the gaps, density, etc. The type test I wrote categorizes products into 11 different types, based on the value of a subset of variables taken from a vector of a couple hundred variables but I didn't want to include all that mess of code. And I was thinking of maybe running this fingerprinter on a per type basis, set to repeat, and looking for matching indexs (pixels) to see what products have in common per type.
Or maybe using them to train a classifier of some sort.
Each fingerprint of a product shares something like 16-20% of indexes with it's factors, so I'm thinking thats an avenue to explore.
What the fingerprinter does is better explained by the subfunction findAb.
The code contains a comment explaining this, but basically the function destructures a number into a series of division and subtractions, and makes a note of how many divisions in a 'run'.
Typically this is for numbers divisible by 2.
So a number like 35 might look like this, when done
p = 35
((((p-1)/2)-1)/2/2/2/2)-1
And we'd represent that as
ab(w, x, y, z)
Where w is the starting value 35 in this case,
x is the number to divide by at each step, y is the adjustment (how much to subtract by when we encounter a number not divisible by x), and z is a string or vector of our results
which looks something like
ab(35, 2, 1, [1, 4])
Why [1,4]
because we were only able to divide by 2 once, before having to subtract 1, and repeat the process. And then we had a run of 4 divisions.
And for the fingerprinter, we do this for each prime under our number p, the list returned becoming another row in our fingerprint. And then that gets converted into an image.
And again, what I find interesting is that
unknown factors of products appear to share many of these same indexes.
What I might do is for, each individual run of Ab, I might have some sort of indicator for when *another* factor is present in the current factor list for each index. So I might ask, at the given step, is the current result (derived from p), divisible by 2 *and* say, 3? If so, mark it.
And then when I run this through the fingerprinter itself, all those pixels might get marked by a different color, say, make them blue, or vary their intensity based on the number of factors present, I don't know. Whatever helps the untrained eye to pick up on leads, clues, and patterns.
If it doesn't make sense, take another look at the example:
((((p-1)/2)-1)/2/2/2/2)-1
This is semi-unique to each product. After the fact, you can remove the variable itself, and keep just the structure in question, replacing the first variable with some other number, and you get to see what pops out the otherside.
If it helps, you can think of the structure surrounding our variable p as the 'electron shell', the '-1's as bandgaps, and the runs of '2's as orbitals, with the variable at the center acting as the 'nucleus', with the factors of that nucleus acting as the protons and neutrons, or nougaty center lol.
Anyway I just wanted to share todays flavor of insanity on the off chance someone might enjoy reading it.1
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