My latest mandatory training:
CSRF can be really bad.

We’ll no fucking shit Sherlock!

The company I work for got new owners a while ago and it’s starting to get more and more corporate.

We get several BS emails a day. They are generally incentives to share company marketing on social media, ‘interesting’ information about managers I neither know nor care about, updates from all the many virtue signalling clubs or the CEOs latest ramblings.

I suspect it’s only going to get worse.
I have no idea why companies feel the need to indoctrinate their workers into the company culture. I just want to do my job and get paid. I have no interest in faking positivity and devoting my life to any organisation.

Might be time to start looking for a new job.

Anyone live in a country that isn’t a complete a total shitshow?

I just want to go somewhere the government aren’t a bunch of lying, self serving arseholes, tech hasn’t been turned into a joke by idiots, I can have a decent standard of living and my kids can get a good education.

There’s got to be somewhere on the planet.

If not, does anyone want to start a new country with me?

We’ll today has gone to shit for several reasons.
Everyone and everything can fuck off and die. Think I’m going to drink until I can’t remember who I am. Obviously after I’ve finished work, picked the kids up, done some housework and got the kids into bed. FML

My motivation has completely gone. Any time I get something that requires even a small amount of thought I can’t find any energy to bother.

Caffeine doesn’t help anymore, I just want to go to sleep for a few months.

Getting requests at work to look at stuff I did over a month ago as they’ve only just decided to test it. The original tickets were a shitshow and I did my best to understand what they wanted but I’m not even sure they knew.

Now they’re coming back with business rules that aren’t working as expected and them not being sure how stuff works.

If I’m really honest, I just don’t care. I want to be helpful and nice and I’m doing a good job pretending but really, bringing myself to even look at this feels exhausting. It all just makes me want to go back to bed for a couple of weeks.

The company I work for is being bought out by a large corporate. Apparently I should be excited. I just feel sad.

Why do people ask me stuff on a Friday afternoon? Just let me nap in peace you fuckers!!

Got a bit annoyed with something yesterday and decided to look at what other jobs might be out there. Not seriously but sometimes it’s good to know you have options.

I went on to LinkedIn for the first time in a while and FML it’s got way worse than it used to be. These are the posts I saw in the 5 minutes I was as on there (I have summarised them a bit):

‘I was having a bad day and ended up saving some deaf/blind woman’s life by rescuing her dog from a river. So if you’re having a a bad day it might end up being good’ - erm no you didn’t, not even your Nan is going to believe this BS!

‘I am a working Mum, it’s really hard for all of these reasons (all the stuff about how you actually have to look after your own child)’ - well no shit Sherlock, did it not even cross your mind that incubating and then raising a small human was going to be time consuming. Even without a job it’s hard enough, there are plenty of working parents that would have told you beforehand.

From a Facebook employee, they are currently going on about inclusivity at Facebook:
‘It’s really important for me that my team know who I’m married to…(I didn’t read the rest)’ - I’m pretty sure that your team couldn’t give a rats arse who you’re married too and only really care if you’re an arsehole or not.

I thought all the jokes about LinkedIn were weird one off posts but apparently not. What is worse is all the people who applaud this crap. Seriously, pixel people are crazy!!!

Me this morning: just got a small ticket, should only take a couple of hours. I’ll be done by lunchtime.

1 hour later: this class is a bit of a mess, I’ll just do a bit of refactoring

3 hours later: why the fuck didn’t I just leave this alone. This is going to take days to finish!!!

3 1/2 hours later: git undo and pretend it didn’t happen

Completely lost all my confidence in dev. Spent a few years as a solo dev, sometimes with just one junior. Was quite happy getting requirements, making design decisions, just getting on with it.

I knew I was lacking in a few skills but was given no time to learn anything, so decided to leave for a more structured company.

Got a job with a great company 18 months ago, good devs, proper development lifecycle in place etc.

I just feel completely lost. I’ve felt stressed since I started, feel like I don’t know anything anymore. I’m not confident in anything I write. I just feel stuck and a complete idiot. I kind of expected it when I started but 18 months later and it’s not getting any better.

Have no idea how to fix this, maybe there isn’t a way. Maybe I’m just done with this career and I need something new. So fed up with it and pissed off with myself.

Sometimes I just want an easy fucking life.

No social media or news for 2 weeks. It was nice to give my brain a break.

Internet people seem even more crazy now than they did before!!

I’m interested to see if anyone has had a complete break from all social media and news for a while and what difference it made to them.

Been feeling increasingly tired and stressed recently and thinking of taking a month off, if I can. All SM and news seem to tell you is how the world is burning today. As much as this doesn’t help me, I still feel compelled to check stuff all the time. There’s absolutely no point as there is literally nothing I can do to make any difference.

So I’m thinking a month off might actually make me feel a bit better. I’m trying to think of downsides but I’m not sure there are any.

I’d have a cafe by the sea and have good coffee and nice homemade cakes.

I actually think about this a lot and then I have to come back to reality and realise I’m not that good at baking and I have bills to pay and there’s a pandemic on so nothing is open anyway.

!dev

Sitting in a vaccination centre waiting for my Covid vaccine.

Not looking forward to it, I hate injections!!!

Things that are pissing me off today, after only 1 1/2 hours of work:

1) Dumb arse questions that ask why stuff isn’t working how they wanted, even though it’s working as per the specifications. Try creating a request once you actually know what you want you fucking moron.

2) Front end. I know some people like it but I don’t. Especially when it’s a complete clusterfuck, spaghetti, several thousand line long JavaScript file that dynamically creates the html, and has functions that run based on css classes.

3) Pointless meetings, I have one later. Arranged by our customer service team, with a client and has something to do with a completed piece of work. I have absolutely no idea what it’s about but half the world seems to have been invited so I’m guessing they want to waste time talking shit about nothing for a while.

I’m seriously considering faking my own death today. Or just being sick as it’s slightly less extreme.

Copied a program out of a magazine to draw a picture of a butterfly on a ZX Spectrum when I was about 7. I was not impressed and decided it was way too much effort.

Got to 19, hated my job and decided to do a part time software development degree. Programming had moved on quite a bit by then :)

What the fuck is wrong with people that feel the need to schedule a meeting to ask me a fucking question.

If something doesn’t work then I’ll need to look into it and you sitting there silently while I look through code is an utterly pointless waste of time.

You can send an email, slack, teams, skype, fucking carrier pigeon, I don’t care. Just stop booking in pointless fucking meetings and learn how to write down a coherent question instead. Lazy fuckers!!

Would anyone like to do my job for me today, I really don’t feel like it. It’ll involve the following:
10 minutes: coffee
20 minutes: find next Jira ticket that is actually ready to be worked on
5 hours: figure out WTF is being requested
2 hours: reconsider life choices, have a small existential crisis
30 minutes: find part of code to change
2 minutes: update code and create PR

That’s it really. Anyone interested?

Asking every other fucking day if your shitty low priority bug has been fixed yet is not going to make me fix it any quicker.
I’ve said I’ll let you know when it’s done, all asking me does is piss me off. Maybe if you had some actual work to do you wouldn’t keep annoying dev with your dumb-ass requests.
Actually I released a fix this morning, I’m just going to keep that information to myself for a while.

Why are some people so incapable of creating a fucking coherent request.
I just need to know the data contract and the endpoint. Not a fucking storyline with random documents that you might have been sent. I’m not interested in picking apart your crap to get to what I actually need.

This is why stuff takes so long!!!

I’m at that point in the sprint where I’m considering if gin will improve things and exactly how much is needed to make it all better.

I sort of understand why they are necessary but I really fucking hate annual reviews.
I can barely remember last week let alone what I’ve contributed in the last year. I’ve got absolutely no interest in talking about my achievements and goals.

My goals are trying not to go insane and earning enough to pay the bills and put food on the table. Beyond that, right now, I really don’t care.

Can’t actually put that on my review documents though so instead I’ll have to make some benign crap up and pretend I’m enthusiastic about my job.

Wish I could just think up this stuff instead of staring angrily at my screen for the last hour.

My family supported me in as far as they happily fucked off out of my life a few years ago.
Neither of my parents were able to accept that I had anything other than ‘a little job in IT’ or that I actually knew more about development than they did. They both like to feel they are massively superior to the majority of other humans on the planet. To be fair to them it probably made me work harder to prove them wrong.

Good to see that some parents were supportive of their kids though. And to the ones that weren’t - it’s their loss!

!dev

Doesn’t matter where you get to in life and what you achieve. Doing the school run will reduce you to the intellect and social awareness of a potato.

Mostly I prefer remote working, today though it’s pissing me off.
I’ve spent most of the day waiting for people to respond to my questions. I’ve got stuff I need to get done today but I’m sitting here waiting on other people to do shit that I could probably do myself by haven’t been shown yet. So fucking frustrating!!!

The futility of working in a bank, or probably any other big corporation.

I was working in a small dev team that made improvements to the applications and processes of the department we were in. I was given the project of creating a small data entry system to track some communications. The comms were currently stored in a spreadsheet and had no validation which made any analysis of the data difficult.

Boring but easy, should have taken about a week.

We had 3 meetings just to define requirements, they took about a month to send me their shitty little spreadsheet so I could actually see what they were recording. Over the next 2 months they kept changing what they wanted. Finally got it finished just before I went on maternity leave.

Went off thinking, that I’ll never have to deal with that clusterfuck again.

Had a baby, went back 9 months later.

First thing I got given was that shitty project back. They hadn’t even tested it - in 9 fucking months! I transferred departments not long after. I have no idea if it ever got done.

And that is on my list of reasons as to why I’ll never work in a large corporate again.

3 days away from some much needed time off. I have stuff that I really need to do but I’ve just been sat staring at the screen for the last hour.
It’s going to be a long 3 days!!

Monday morning. I need to write an API with crap client documentation and we don’t yet have access to the clients API. They don’t really have a clue what they’re doing and create their shit following a script so they can employ people with limited technical knowledge.
Our API is embedded in a system that I don’t fully understand and can’t really test locally.
Fuck this shit, I can’t be arsed and I want to go back to bed.

Every few years I seem to have some sort of breakdown. It slowly builds over months, I get more tired, everything gets more difficult. I’m not able to concentrate, my memory is shit and I struggle with work. I can sit at work staring at a screen for hours not having a fucking clue how to do the job I’ve been doing for the last 14 years. The work builds up, I make more mistakes and this just makes it all worse.
It culminates with me feeling completely detached from reality and wishing I could just stop breathing.
Today was that day, pushed over the edge by my self obsessed, judgemental sister-in-law, who is clueless about when to keep her dumb-ass opinions to herself. Not her fault but was just the last straw!
Luckily I had a therapy session today, which helped a bit.
Just wish it could be done and will fuck off now for another few years and let me get my life back.
Hate this fucking shitty depression. Don’t need replies to this, just needed somewhere to vent.