Guess which handsome ass father fucker finally got a dev job? I DID. But it's a startup. Any important questions which I need to ask them before I take up this offer?

To stop procrastinating, cause I really need to get shit done.

Today I learned that best practices are nothing more than widely used hacks.

JQuery? No thank you, i like it vanilla. Like my porn.

Multitasking : why fuck up a single thing when you can fuck up multiple things together

What's​ better than finding an exploit in someone elses code? Finding a way to fix it.

Talk about 3 in a row

FUCKING HELL! I JUST WANNA STAY HOME AND CODE! NO I DONT WANNA WATCH THAT SHITTY MOVIE AGAIN! NO I DONT WANNA GO DRINKING WITH YOU AND LISTEN TO YOUR LUDICROUS BRAGGING! NO I FUCKING DONT WANT TO MEET YOUR COOL FRIENDS WITH FACEBOOK PHOTOGRAPHY PAGES! NO I DONT WANT TO GET A NEW LIFE, CODE IS MY ART AND ALL I WANT IS TO STAY AND PRACTICE IT TILL MY EYES GO DRY AND WHEN THAT HAPPENS I'LL CODE IN FUCKING BRAILLE!

Best office prank? A few days ago I was walking by the sys admins desk. He was dead tired so he went to get some coffee. I noticed his screen was unlocked, so guess what? I rm -rf'ed some important looking folder!

Jk I don't work in any office.

As a fresher I'm trying to get a Dev job and people around me constantly tell me how hard/ impossible it is and that I should try something else. All I think is "THANKS FOR CHEERING ME ON!"

me : my resolution is to make a github commit everyday!
me to me : write a cron job to do it.

College be like : welcome to web technologies class, proceed to
*5 months of HTML*
*2 weeks of CSS*
*1 week of Javascript*
* Guest appearance by PHP for 5 mins*