Seriously, ChatGPT?? What other use could you have in this historic moment?? Guess OpenAI forgot to train opportunism into its models.

If people had antlers, would you be basically ok with that, or would it cause some kind of issues?

I gave up trying to use generic numbers in rust and just converted everything to f64

now I can do math

stupid system

*moves into a new language, converts language to JavaScript*

Forgive him, for he believes that the customs of his tribe are the laws of nature.
— G.B. Shaw

Why is it that companies feel the need to ask, “Why do you wanna work here?” Or “What made you apply?”

Ah, idk, just spitballing here, you’re hiring and I’m unemployed.

I need money, and I heard you pay ppl to do work for you. 🤷🏾‍♂️

I have bills to pay and u have the money to satisfy that need.

Good enough or should I keep going?? 🙄

Washington is awesome, Microsoft is awesome, I love this place

I really gotta stop accepting food from other people

my birthday was the other day and my roommate wanted to get me something special to eat for free

I said I keep dreaming of the samosa salad from Indian places he would get and I would keep stealing a spoon full of to try (this was after I got sick and insensitive to food so I was cautious)

he insisted it was from this fast food place... that's weird. I don't think it was. he insists all Indian places have it on their menu but he just didn't know. and he was getting this fast food's place one and that's the one I liked. ok. I consent.

I go running, come back, shower, hungry and food arrived, so I scuff down half the samosa salad thing
now I feel like trash
and it tastes nothing like it
it has fucking BBQ sauce in it. no yogurt. it's supposed to be Indian. what the fuck, sweet-ass bqq sauce? the spiciness is some retarded white people taste. this isn't the punch of Indian food.
30% of the mass is cucumber. wat. there's fucking pomegranate seeds in it so you can't even chew it. what am I even eating. the samosa pieces are all soggy and not crunchy like I remember. the spiciness sucks. there's no yogurt to counteract it either. just pathetic

and now I feel like garbage. I feel sick to my stomach. because that BBQ sauce was a lot more sugar than you could taste.

I fucking hate my life. I hope I don't get sick from the food, cuz I have food insensitivities... and I knew before when I took spoonfuls of what he ordered they didn't effect me... but that wasn't this.

this fucker literally lied and used me to order food guilt-free under the pretense of "hey it's your birthday and I wanna get you a meal". and he orders disgusting fast food that isn't even food. "for me". while lying to me. me who can't even eat the damned cherries I love without my brain degrading because those are too much sugar. what the hell is wrong with this guy

I know I got downvoted for this before but fuck I hate fat people. I don't want to eat fast food. I want real food. I don't want to get sick off fake fucking BBQ sauce infused with disgusting sugar. all this guy does is make excuses for the food he wants to eat. maybe I'm just literally food insensitive watching him eat himself to death I don't know. I feel like puking

I swear nothing good anyone ever does for you is ever for you. people are rotten.

Sufficiently advanced XML is indistinguishable from satire

I may have accidentally found a legit factorization method that converts factoring to a combinatorics problem over a graph, with a time complexity that is the factorial of the logarithm of the semi prime being factored.

I don't know if this is supposed to be good or not, and I don't want to post it prematurely like I almost always do. Not at least until I study its properties better, but it's still a pretty interesting find I think.

It's amazing how companies like Autodesk and Adobe see Linux as some "toy". When we talk about Linux we are talking about a professional workstation. My entire company uses Linux (currently Fedora 39) on its workstations, and all of our servers use FreeBSD. Not because it's free, but because it proves to be better than the alternatives to what we produce. We pay for licenses for JetBrains, BricsCAD, MATLAB and I still happily pay STEAM to play my Civilization, Doom Eternal, CS2 and I use Proton to continue my adventures in Diablo and Star Craft, all PAID. Adobe and Autodesk, be ashamed and instead of talking about market share, admit that you do not have competence.

every time I encounter code that's not rust I get jealous because it's so much easier to understand what it's doing lol

but it's also ugly tbf

I’ve been making so many crochet things to give as gifts to coworkers during an offsite.

when prototyping generics just seem evil...

I could, but I should not.

it beckons =-=

git checkout -

^ this takes you to previous branch btw.

Hello fellow desk slaves - how we doin'?

Used to be if I was good enough, now it's if work is going to make me a worse person than I was when I started (passionless and not apathetic)

I fucking hate being a Dev sometimes.

G i v e m e f u l f i l l i n g t a s k s p l e a s e

Not these shitty ones with API documentation riddled with holes 🫠😥

My crude MS Paint-like drawing I made when bored in a meeting.
It was of sexy squidward screening in the background while I presented to two managers and switched screens around in a corporate meeting and they saw it for a good 40 seconds on the big monitor 🫠😅😁

Fuck. Mobbing really does fix everything wrong with development*

*Unless your colleagues are complete cunts

DevRant is making shit jokes at 3AM in comments with tech strangers online

Have a good weekend 💃🕺

Straight women are so boring sometimes.

They don't realise how basic guys and life is.

Straight guys don't tend to be that complicated.

Dick is dick. Enjoy your time while you're alive

Fuckers didn't even give my account access to the fucking soap action I was calling after 3 weeks of email chains and other back and forth.

First the credentials I was given "we're fully set up" and now this BS??

Fucking test your live and sandbox environments work BEFORE you let your clients start their integrations.

And if they have issues, try to emulate the e-2-e test and prove you can complete the transaction yourself BEFORE emailing back 🤦

Change my mind

Today I learnt you can ride cows like you can a horse

If you ever feel unwanted, just know that someone, somewhere, has wanked about you at some point

They're masochists ofc, but it still counts

Please don't mutter your ideas on calls or trail it off mid sentence to mouse level's of sound 🐁.
It's so awkward having to ask what you've said every few moments.
*Especially* if we work together all day all week

N.B. speakers on max volume + auto-captions are already on so I can piece together what you said.

Conversations are so difficult otherwise

That is all

TL;DR: I hate how management doesn't listen to devs (even Dev managers).

We need to sort out our release process where I'm at. It takes a Dev about 2 solid days to complete and it's hideously involved and ripe for human error. They're completely out of action until it's done and it happens once a week!

It's stopping us releasing business critical bug fixes and features that need to go out. Instead the work just sits in develop for days doing fuck all.
Can't be agile if it takes so long to deliver value 🙃

Plus makes any fuck ups by our department look worse as it takes an age until it's fixed which reduces their collective trust in us and our opinions.
Making any improvements we want to make harder todo as they're harder to convince 🙃

Has anyone had any success getting automated releases?
How did you convince management to prioritise it?

I need to convince someone who has some influence in my company and ask how they got that influence

I know I was one at some point, but juniors can be so frustrating at times.

After some pairing for a while they're quick to adopt the "Dev" mindset and think as far as they need to...

... but with this latest batch... that day couldn't come sooner 🫠

Having to explain how exceptions work again is the last thing you wanna do under tight time constraints 🙃

Question for the old timers: is it possible to work as a dev for the rest of your life and be happy?
.
.
.
Does it get any better or is dev burnout baked into the business model of every company?
The CEO flat out admitted it was exactly that where I'm at a few weeks ago 😞

I didn't know they 'patched' the balding bug in men, but apparently there are real medicines now that can prevent + stop it in men?

https://nhs.uk/conditions/...

Looking at some of you guys 👀