3
vidu
3y

I have anxiety attacks and i wanted to get my mind of things. I took 2 internships at once so that my mind would stay focused. Turned out that was really the worst idea i ever came up with.
I was fretting a lot. People calling me from different time zones at 1-2 am midnight asking me about updates. Things went completely messed up faught with my friends.

So i messaged my boss. I told him i have some problems in life i need time to sort it. And believe me he said take a month off.
He is really the coolest boss i know (out of the 4 i ever worked dor 😅)

Guys a lesson don't overdo the things you love. You want to make it a good experience. But making it unbearable to yourself can make you hate your love for coding.

Comments
  • 1
    How does your day schedule of 2 internships look like?
  • 1
    @psukys 8-11 gym plus breakfast 12-3 sleep 4-8 work 11-4 work
  • 2
    You're going to end up like me. Never at 100%, always kinda tired, not able to concentrate properly. You'll screw up your body clock, you'll do your body and mind irreparable damage. Take my advice, and take it now: choose the internship that you get the most out of. Resign from the other one. Give yourself some free time. Use it to study a little, but don't forget to get out and be social. Do something cool, like learning to play an instrument or working on a pet project.

    I'm 25 and feel 60. I worked for one of the big five for just a year and a half, flying around the world and speaking different languages every week. I visited a warzone, saw atrocities beyond measure. I ran a team of my own with no experience of doing so, and still had my own work to do.

    When I was made redundant I crashed, and hard. I couldn't concentrate, I drank more than ever and my mental health took a nosedive. Now I'm trying to start a business and I'm barely managing the day to day.

    Don't be like me.
  • 1
    I should also note that when I worked for ****** I worked ridiculous hours. I slept where I could, when I could. I had no time for anything but work, and it psychologically ruined me. I showered, ate and slept at work for a week straight once.
  • 0
    @monr0e i totally understand you.
    Psychologicaly speaking this is called stimulus and response (Skinner's theory of behaviourism) Where attaching something you love with the feeling of pain will make you less interested in the things you once found interesting.
  • 1
    @vidu sort of. There's a lot more going on than I specified, and not just to do with being a burned out developer. Its the knock-on effects of general stress, social isolation, lack of situational permanence and rampant alcoholism that have really played into my lack of motivation to do anything more than sit behind my computer playing games and ingesting shit content.

    It takes a huge effort to get past anything, but keeping momentum is easy. Its getting started that is difficult.
  • 0
    @monr0e I started seeing a psychologist. I'll recommend that you too.
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