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Day Week Month All
  • 98
    FUCK WORDPRESS TO DEATH!

    Seriously, I have a degree in computer science and I can't for the fucking lfie of it understand the fucking architecture of fucking WORDPRESS!

    How many fucking times when developing fucking shitty wordpress sites for clients you spent 66% of the time debugging some stupid fucki9ng shit related to the retarded monolithic fucking stupid architecture of this huge retarded abomination which should be killed in a fire with dragonfire.

    How many fucking times while using trellis sage bedrock mother fucking super uber framework bubblegum you find yourself struggling with the fgucking broweser shit sync or some other fucking stupid bubblegum fix shit to make wordpress even remotely a decent experience to work with?

    Even when buffed with a fucking shitton of boilerplate shit code from people who want developers to not fucking kill themselves while working on this fucking piece of shit framework the developing experience with wordshit makes me want to blow my fucking brains out with a desert eagle.

    I seriously can't fucking stress how fucking shit this whole framework is and I seriously hope people stop using it for good. Wordpress was made by a bunch of fucking retarded monkeys who barely knew how to write afucking hello world.

    This is the last fuckign time Im ever going to accept a wordpress project from my clients this fucking framework has driven me mad for fu cking years and i've finally had it with thsi fucking piece of shit framework and i fucking hope it gets buried 1000 km down and never dug up ever fuckign again.

    Wordpress is the single most fucking horrid abomination that has ever been created in the fucking history of the tech industry.
    rant fuck wordpress
    31
  • 63
    IBM

    I have replied to them with scripts, curl commands, and Swagger docs (PROVIDED TO SUPPORT THEIR API), everything that could possibly indicate there's a bug. Regardless, they refuse to escalate me to level 1 support because "We cant reproduce the issue in a dev environment"

    Well of course you can't reproduce it in a dev environment otherwise you'd have caught this in your unit tests. We have a genuine issue on our hands and you couldnt give less of a shit about it, or even understand less than half of it. I literally gave them a script to use and they replied back with this:

    "I cannot replicate the error, but for a resource ID that doesnt exist it throws an HTTP 500 error"

    YOUR APP... throws a 500... for a resource NOT FOUND?????????!!!!!!!!!! That is the exact OPPOSITE of spec, in fact some might call it a MISUSE OF RESTFUL APIs... maybe even HTTP PROTOCOL ITSELF.

    I'm done with IBM, I'm done with their support, I'm done with their product, and I'm DONE playing TELEPHONE with FIRST TIER SUPPORT while we pay $250,000/year for SHITTY, UNRELENTING RAPE OF MY INTELLECT.
    rant wk185 ibm tech support
    11
  • 60
    This facts are killing me

    "During his own Google interview, Jeff Dean was asked the implications if P=NP were true. He said, "P = 0 or N = 1." Then, before the interviewer had even finished laughing, Jeff examined Google’s public certificate and wrote the private key on the whiteboard."

    "Compilers don't warn Jeff Dean. Jeff Dean warns compilers."

    "gcc -O4 emails your code to Jeff Dean for a rewrite."

    "When Jeff Dean sends an ethernet frame there are no collisions because the competing frames retreat back up into the buffer memory on their source nic."

    "When Jeff Dean has an ergonomic evaluation, it is for the protection of his keyboard."

    "When Jeff Dean designs software, he first codes the binary and then writes the source as documentation."

    "When Jeff has trouble sleeping, he Mapreduces sheep."

    "When Jeff Dean listens to mp3s, he just cats them to /dev/dsp and does the decoding in his head."

    "Google search went down for a few hours in 2002, and Jeff Dean started handling queries by hand. Search Quality doubled."

    "One day Jeff Dean grabbed his Etch-a-Sketch instead of his laptop on his way out the door. On his way back home to get his real laptop, he programmed the Etch-a-Sketch to play Tetris."

    "Jeff Dean once shifted a bit so hard, it ended up on another computer. "
    joke/meme jeff dean facts
    4
  • 54
    The Dutch minister of justice and (national) security is joining the countries that are in favor of weakening encryption algorithms so law enforcement "can combat child pornography and terrorism better".

    Oh yeah no fucking great, I was hoping that the Dutch ministers weren't as incompetent on this one as the ones from the US and Australia who want this as well (and probably even more countries).

    Let's fuck over an entire country with false arguments while it won't help for shit!

    😑

    Sources: (dutch)
    https://tweakers.net/nieuws/160786/...
    https://security.nl/posting/634061/...
    rant
    18
  • 49
    Found this on discord.
    Could be copypasta but I decided to share it anyway.

    "I use Linux as my operating system," I state proudly to the unkempt, bearded man. He swivels around in his desk chair with a devilish gleam in his eyes, ready to mansplain with extreme precision. "Actually", he says with a grin, "Linux is just the kernel. You use GNU+Linux!' I don't miss a beat and reply with a smirk, "I use Alpine, a distro that doesn't include the GNU coreutils, or any other GNU code. It's Linux, but it's not GNU+Linux."

    The smile quickly drops from the man's face. His body begins convulsing and he foams at the mouth and drops to the floor with a sickly thud. As he writhes around he screams "I-IT WAS COMPILED WITH GCC! THAT MEANS IT'S STILL GNU!" Coolly, I reply "If windows was compiled with gcc, would that make it GNU?" I interrupt his response with "-and work is being made on the kernel to make it more compiler-agnostic. Even you were correct, you wont be for long."

    With a sickly wheeze, the last of the man's life is ejected from his body. He lies on the floor, cold and limp. I've womansplained him to death.
    random possible copypasta linux gnu
    12
  • 46
    Root encounters HR at her new job.

    So, I left my job a few weeks ago. I was pretty sad about it, so I didn't want to write anything about it. It was a great place to work, with great managers, decent coworkers, and interesting work. I also had free reign over how I built things, what to improve, etc. Within about four months, I authored over half of the total commits on their backend repo, added a testing suite with 90% coverage, significantly improved the security (more accurately: added security), etc. but I got a job offer that allowed me to work remotely, and make well over six figures (usd). I couldn't turn it down, even though I wanted to. So, I left. I'm still genuinely sad about that. I had emotions and everything. 🙁 I stayed on long enough to finish the last of the features for their new product launch, and make sure everything was stable. I'm welcome back whenever, though they don't want to have remote employees, and I want to move, so. that's probably not going to happen. sigh.

    Anyway, I started my new job this week. Rented an office (read: professional closet) and everything! It's been veritable mountains of HR paperwork so far. That's all I've done besides some accounts setup. I've seriously only worked on and completed one ticket so far in two and a half days, and I still have six documents/contracts to sign! (and benefits; that'll probably take my weekend.)

    But getting an I9 thing notarized? Apparently I only have three days before I'm legally unemployable by them or something, idk. HR made it sound ridiculously dire and important, and reminded me like five or more times. I figured it was just some notary service; that takes like 10 minutes, right? So I put it off until my second day so I didn't have to disappear in the middle of my first day. Anyway, I called a bunch of notary services on day 2, and apparently only like 5% of them both do notary services this time of year and aren't booked full. And of those, probably another 5% will notarize I9 documents.. No idea why it's rare, but whatever, I'm not a notary.

    The HR lady assured me that I didn't need any special documents; I should just go there, present my IDs, and the notary will provide or draft documents for everything else. Totally doesn't sound right, but fine; I'm not a notary nor will I ever work in HR, so I'm not very knowledgeable about this. So, against my better judgement I decided to just go anyway. I called around and finally found a place that wasn't closed, busy, or refusing, and drove over there. Waited. Waited. Waited. Notary lady was super slow in every single action. (I should mention that it's now 10am, and I have a meeting with the Senior VP of Engineering [a stern, stubborn old goat who enjoys making people feel inadequate] at 12:30pm.) The notary lady looks like she's an npc updating in slow motion (maybe at 0.25x speed?) and can't seem to understand what I need. Eventually, she tells me exactly what I had assumed: if there's no document, she can't notarize said document, and she doesn't have an I9 for the company I'm trying to work for. (like, duh.) So I thank her for proving the flow of time is variable, which she ignores in slow motion, and drive back home. It's now about 11.

    I message the same HR lady, and the useless wench gawks in surprise and says she's never heard of that ridiculous request before. It took prodding to get her to respond every time, but after some (very slow) back and forth, she says she wants to call the notary personally and ask what they need. I waited around for another response that never came, and eventually just drove to the notary place again to have them notarize the required ID documents. That plus my chat history with HR should be enough to show that I bloody well tried, and HR just shit the bed instead. I finally got them notarized at like 12:10, and totally broke the speed limit the entire way to the office, found the last remaining parking spot, and made it to my office just in time for the meeting. seriously, less than two minutes to spare. Meeting was interesting (mostly about security), but totally made me facepalm, shout "Seriously!? What the hell are you thinking!?" and make slapping motions at some of the people talking. I will probably rant about that next.

    But anyway, I'm willing to bet that the useless wench won't get back to me before the notary closes, if at all, and will somehow try to blame it completely on me if I bring it up again. Passive aggressive bitch. She's probably thinking: "If I don't help her with these mandatory legal processes, it'll be her fault she didn't get them done in time. I mean, they're so easy! She's just doing it wrong." I fucking hate HR.
    rant new job mr. stern useless wench hr
    13
  • 44
    Why do HR people ask stupid questions like the following ones? Everytime I get those questions, I have imaginary answers like the ones right after each question.

    Why do you want to work here?

    - Obviously, because I need the money to survive. I'm not here because I love working for you and having to endure your stress. I'm not that type of a kinky person.

    Are you flexible?

    - Why? Do you want to annoy me when I'm sleeping in the middle of the night because of a sudden deadline or because a god damn employee didn't show up?

    Do you see yourself as a perfect fit for both developer and tech support roles?

    - Read my fucking resume, moron. I applied for a developer role. Nothing else.

    Where do you see yourself in 5 years?

    - As if you would care. It's none of your business, but since we are at it. I see myself as your manager in 5 years. Hope that you like that thought.

    We didn't bother reading your CV. Would you like to tell us about yourself?

    - Nope. Have a nice day and suck my dick. I'm leaving.

    Can you give us your phone number and the phone number of your girlfriend?

    - I didn't know that I am selling my soul to your company by accepting this job offer. I'm not your slave and you will not call me whenever I'm enjoying my private time.

    What's motivating you?

    - Money and the peaceful vibe at work when you are shutting the fuck up when I'm fully focused during my projects.

    How do you handle stress?

    - I dick slap everyone infront of me.

    Do you see yourself as a hard worker?

    - Nah, I'm not interested in sucking dicks, eating her ass and bending over to get a little bit of a raise.
    question stupid hr questions
    11
  • 44
    Our manager is not a developer and he has no idea of what we are doing most of the time, but he thinks that stand-up meetings are the coolest way to control us.
    Sometimes coworkers joke about his lack of knowledge and today I think we reached the highest jerk level: «Yesterday I opened a new branch on the git repository and today I'll continue on this task».
    I struggled to stay serious on my turn.
    rant manager stand-up bullshit meeting scrum
    6
  • 40
    Half life 2 runs smoothly in a 12 year old PC with Nvidia 8500, 1 GB RAM, and a dual core.
    A FPS with wavy water reflection, body physics and huge designed maps which is updates every fucking frame.

    Today I can't run smoothly an IDE with 8 GB of RAM and 4 cores.
    A program which only reacts to events stutters if I write at more than 3 letters per sec.

    I wanna go back. Can we go back? Lets keep the new hardware and go back with the software pleeeease.
    rant bloatware old
    23
  • 33
    What I have learned by learning OpenGL for about 2 days.
    1) C++ and its compilers are clunky as shit
    2) There is a minimal amount of entry level docs
    3) You need 5th grade math to do programming
    4) Comment every single line to not get lost in OpenGL API
    5) The include directory is not in the project but at /usr/local/include
    6) Giorno's theme from Jojo's Bizzare Adventure is fucking awesome
    rant c++ opengl til maths jojo cpp linux
    8
  • 30
    !dev (Please, don't take this very seriously, I'm kind of burnt out)

    I'm not having a good time.

    I can't even write a post to properly explain how I feel.

    I feel disappointed by life and by myself in many levels. Life is disappointing. I am disappointing too.

    I'm having issues to focus, can't even write a couple of lines of code.

    Time to listen to some emo lofi and write about how much I hate myself.

    I wished I didn't feel these feelings.
    I wished I didn't regret so many things I did or didn't do.
    I wished I could fucking understand everything I read, but I don't, everything I read is gibberish, every paragraph makes me feel like I'm drifting in a storm.

    I wished I was happy with my career, with my job. I wished I had a true friend.
    I wished I could finish one goddamn fucking project for once.

    I wished there was something that made me unique, but I don't think there's any.
    I just feel like an ant, and that I don't really matter.

    I don't feel like I'm someone at all, I feel like I'm experiencing a dream, and a rather boring one.

    Programming used to be challenging and fun for me, but it has become this dull and stressful ordeal.

    The internet has shown me that I don't matter really. I remember being a little kid and believing that the internet would not discriminate you, that right from the comfort of your house you could connect to people and be cared for, and collaborate in something.

    But every year that passes I see that I was wrong. I have tried to put in time into people, I have asked people how they're doing, I have cared for their projects. But there's no reciprocation.

    The internet itself has become a thing where the big fish only matters. The top 1k users will get 99% of the attention.

    Fuck nurture, rule competition.

    What's the point of creating a github project that you think it's cool? No one will give two shits about it, it won't make a goddamn difference whether you push it or not.

    You know what fucking matters? If you're an apple or google developer and have thousands of followers.

    Bla, bla, bla, I'm depressed...
    random depressed
    13
  • 31
    Grunt, gulp, bower, webpack, rollup, yarn, npm, requirejs, commonjs, browserify, brunch, rollup, parcel, fusebox, babel,
    wrappers for bundlers, frameworks on frameworks, then for css, theres scss, sass, less, stylus, compass, and for templates, handlebars, mustache, nunjucks, underscore, ejs, pug, jade, and about five billion other word-salad tools, all with their own CLIs, each in some way building on npm, but with their own non-congruent little syntax, like no one realized they were reinventing the same problems introduced by domain specific languages, most happy to announce "configuration takes a little time, but it's worth it!"

    No, it's not. Just stop people. Just stop. You're not doing anyone any favors by creating another lib, all you're doing is tooting your own horn and self promoting. Use what exists and stop creating more shit for new people to learn, to add to the giant clusterfuck that is the 2019 hotmess known as "web development."

    You're not special. You're not important. You're lib or tool will be famous for 15 minutes and no one cares what you've made.

    If you want to contribute to web development, do us all a favor and contribute to global sanity by kindly deleting your contribution and any plans to contribute new solutions to problems that have already been solved.
    rant web js npm
    12
  • 29
    Fucking fuck you STRATO. This cancer of a german hosting provider just should be shutdown for crimes against reason. Our website got infected by some shit (I'd like to not state why, there is only so much pressure my main arterie can handle) and now we are supposed to remove that file. Well they blocked all incoming and outgoing traffic to the server so we cannot connect via sftp, the only choice you got with STRATO. And they wont restore network access for the server unless we remove the file. No logical loop to see here citizen, please move on.
    rant hosting infected server german strato
    25
  • 26
    I feel that I should mention my reason for having joined devRant.

    Although I often write computer programs, I do not consider myself to be a computer programmer, for the problems which I solve often do not pertain to the method which I use to solve a problem with a computer program. Rather, I am an intelligence analyst, and this has been my title for approximately sixteen (16) years.

    I joined devRant not only because I wished to better the computer programs which I write, although this could be better accomplished by again reading the specifications for the programming languages which I use, but also because I wished to join an on-line community of which the members are interesting and competent. As I read threads, I observe that both of these requirements have been matched, with the emphasis being placed on the latter requirement.

    I thank the majority of you for maintaining an on-line community which is not (total) crap. Ha.
    rant
    10
  • 26
    I was so excited about getting a fitbit charge 3 for my girlfriend. coz she wanted a fitbit for a long time.

    she as always was trying to find out what i got so she usually starts a guessing game.

    in the middle of the game she says look i dont need to know anymore ill love it whatever it was. i just hope its not a fitbit.

    so me being someone who is completely ok with exercising the stores exchange policy i tell her it is a fitbit. she swears to me shes wanted one forever but she ddnt want me to pay that much money so i dont need to exchange it with anything.

    next day on the phone, she tells me how much she appreciates it and just was afraid id get one coz she ddnt used to like her dads fitbit. but the other models are really cool.

    what was ur dads fitbit? i asked

    oh just the ugly charge 3 one. she replied
    rant
    9
  • 26
    !dev && rant

    What's people's problem with Wikipedia.

    Earlier this week I told my cleaning lady about how Black Friday was so pointless this year, and apparently it's the first thing she heard about Black Friday (she's in her late 30's and a mother of 2, go figure). Not only that but she believed that it occurred every end of the month because someone else told her so. She said it would make sense because it's close to everyone's payday.

    So I go and look up some information about Black Friday for her. All the DDG results somehow shit or cluttered by marketing wank.. your guess is as good as mine. Anyway, appended Wikipedia to get some reasonably good information quick. And that looked for all the world like that was the case. Apparently it's got to do with American Thanksgiving.. who knew?

    She still didn't believe it. "But that's Wikipedia..." So she looked it up on her own phone on some random local site.. it confirmed that indeed it occurs once a year. Well, confirmed to the extent that there was "2017", "2018" and "2019" on the page... Yeah.

    Finally she believed it. At least she didn't double down on it anymore. But seriously.. you're gonna take the words of one random person over a medium that's constantly being improved under the many eyes principle?

    "People can edit Wikipedia so therefore it's bad"

    I really don't get people...
    rant
    19
  • 25
    Riverbed...the software cost USD $120,000+ and their support was horrible.

    Tickets would go unanswered.

    Their documentation was pretty good but there were parts that were wrong and they would not fix it.

    They would usually close an issue because it was opened by someone else 5 years prior and hadn't been fixed.

    The several years I used it their releases consisted of no tangible code enhancements.

    Several times we provided very simple reproducable issues and there response was basicly "just don't do that".
    random wk185
    2
  • 23
    To get myself into a better relation with golang, I started working on an electronless, cancer free, cross platform lightweight slack client.

    I will be using the Fyne UI lib, and am already in love with it.
    So far my mockup UI compiles into a fully portable >20Mb binary. the netcode shouldnt take any more than that, hoping to end up with a ~50Mb project.

    TL;DR:
    - theres gonna be a lightweight slack client available at one point
    - fyne is awesome, get it at https://fyne.io/
    rant fy golang electron cancerfreene nojsallowed native slack
    8
  • 24
    So... Facebook canceled our plugin since we did not update it to newer version.
    Fine.. I'm fine with that. There was no time for that since there's was some very very very fucking important projects, tasks and side requests requested by administration for customers that are actually not real customers since they don't pay or have a contract yet (or ever will!)
    Administration... Wtf our plugin is not
    working?! We are receiving complaints from (paying) customers!!
    Me. Since you assumed the team leading and revoked my rights on leading the team we are doing shittttt work for non paying customer...
    Administration... Resolve FB issue then do non paing customer work. Hum! bether otherwise.. No, otherwise. No. Do both ASAP
    Me. Sure! It's Friday, I'm overtime already by 10h at lunch time,. So I'm fuck off outa here and pick up on whatever I'm keen to on Monday morning after guide the other colleagues on the crapp you dropped on them with your seagull managent!
    This means I might start on Wednesday!
    Xau
    rant seagull managent usual
    3
  • 23
    About to get me a gun license! Then a gun after that.

    I legitimately feeling like a declawed cat whenever I go around the metro minding my own business risking being groped at least. Sometimes I go home at real niqqa hours and you know how that sometimes goes. Knives and mace don't cut it anymore. Sometimes I get irritated that my boyfriend would not stop nagging me for being out and about at night when I had no choice but to let the rush hour pass just so I can commute home. If I have a gun, he would be assured that I am safe.

    It's about time! 😤
    random quick and easy painless protection
    160
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