8
klutch
1y

I wish there was an api that tracked how many farts are getting blasted into office chairs around the world in real time

Comments
  • 4
    It would be difficult to reliably collect that data. It would probably have to be subscription-gated.
  • 5
    I will fund this.
  • 2
    @bahua yes indeed, but just the mere thought of how fast that ticker would be rolling!!!
  • 3
    1st dataset- total amount of Farts being blunderbussed into chairs globally in realtime.

    2nd dataset- the amount of poor bastards who are locked inside vim AS WE SPEAK and can't get out...in real time, of course!

    3rd dataset- total amount of dollars made as a result of theoretically being paid one dollar for every time someone has asked me how to install AND hack Instagram with Kali Linux
  • 2
    @rutee07 THAT'S HOW IT BEGINS
  • 1
    @bahua A wireless sensor you insert into your ass for detecting farts. Connected to your phone where the APP will collect data.
  • 1
    @NoToJavaScript just wait a 5-10 years iphones will collect that
  • 2
    @KDSBest And then someone will point out that Android had this feature for the past 10 years
  • 0
    I heard there is a cpp lib for it....somewhere
  • 1
    Found something !

    The prototype is already there since 2018

    https://arstechnica.com/science/...
  • 0
    Yes!
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