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I feel very terrible. Attending meetings, not able to say anything, I get anxious, my face gets red and heart starts to race. I was never able to get through this situation. This is a big thing, if I set up a meeting to discuss, due to the anxiety I am not able to question anything. I could make a difference that every now and then I ask something basic but due to anxiety I couldn't understand the answer and end up saying yes to thess things although I couldn't understand.
I tried preparing for the meetings but that doesn't work as generally something comes up that I didn't expect and I get so nervous.

Comments
  • 1
    @UnicornPoo Thanks a lot for replying :)

    As a matter of fact, I used to speak nothing because of this crippling fear, I now speak and ask basic questions, the only problem like you said is I am not able to focus on the content and focus on my nervousness. This is something I'll be working on in upcoming months. I really have to stop the negative thinking. I just start to think that I am being judged by everyone that I am not good. I overthink about the small things which make no sense.
  • 0
    @UnicornPoo Thank you, surely I will try this now :)
  • 1
    Sucks to hear, I know what it's like. For me, I got better when I realized that nobody is infallible, and that people who my anxiety believed would crush me for the tiniest imperfection asked me questions that were, in my mind, stupid.

    But they weren't stupid, my questions weren't stupid either and the only one hyper-analyzing situations and expecting perfection was me.
  • 1
    @sudo-woodo That's right. For me also, when I ask questions generally they say it's good question and it's proved when they answer it. I am also overanalyzing the situation but all that happens after that nervousness. In the moment, I'm so nervous nothing makes sense, I ask question but couldn't understand the response.
  • 2
    Mate, it sucks, I totally get it. In part it comes with practice, but it's certainly not as easy as just saying "get over it" like so many seem to.

    There's no one-hit solution I know of - but what might help is to rehearse a few lines you can say in certain scenarios where you don't want to agree because you don't understand, or don't think someone's correct.

    i.e. if someone tries to push you to do something you don't understand, you could come back with "That sounds great, but I think I need a while to get my head around it - can I have a think and then get back to you on that in an hour or so?" Or if someone tries to tell you to do something that you know is wrong, you could say "I don't think that'll work but I can't quite put my finger on why - can we chat in an hour or so when I've collected my thoughts?"

    Regardless, the important thing isn't so much *what* you say but that you've rehearsed it so you can say it reasonably confidently, and don't fall back to agreeing regardless.
  • 1
    @AlmondSauce wow, it's a great advice. I can actually imagine myself saying this in the scenarios happened in the past they fit well. I'll try this. Thanks a lot :) Your advices are always great!!
  • 0
    @UnicornPoo Hey, after reading your comment, I started stopping my negative thoughts as soon as I realised that I am going into the spiral. I am not perfect yet but 10 percent of the time I am able to do this. :)
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