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Impostor syndrome is too real. I frequent feel stress about tasks that are getting delayed. Saying yes to any task given to me (even if there isn't really time for it).

Most recent I had a 1 man project (which I hate, cause I always think it's better to work in teams). It was estimated to take 1 week and ended up being done 2½ weeks after. Remembered I took 1 sick day, just feeling awfull about the project being so delayed and couldn't get my self to go to work.

Well week after the project was done, I had a "employee development conversation" with my CEO and my boss. (like I do every half year). As always they loved to have me on the team and thought I was doing a great job. Same thing I always hear to these meetings.

Deep inside I know I am doing a good job. Keeping up with new things. But my problem is always taking to much on my plate. In the middle of all the code and stuff, I always seem to forget that I am doing a good job and doing my best and start feeling worse again. It's a really bad cycle and causing me to take "fake" sick days just to cool down again. (which often makes me feel even worse, for letting the project getting delayed more).

// DevRant / DevConfession

Comments
  • 1
    First, writing about fake-sick-days off while having identifying data in your profile is a bad combination.

    How long do you do this job,may i ask?

    It's nice to see, that you feel responsibility for what you do, but you shouldn't feel responsible for what you can't change.

    How does saying yes to any task work at your company? When my superior has a task, we talk about what I'm doing and what I'm having on my list, how it would be in priority and what might be delayed as a consequence. Often it's not my decision how much time is needed or planned. Why should i feel bad about it. It's real life, not some tv episode with a guy typing code superfast because it's urgent and then compiles the shit 2 seconds before the explosion.

    Your responsibility is to do the task as good as you can and update your bosses about any delays and planning related stuff as soon as you know it. Planning the bigger scale is their job, not yours.
  • 0
    @CWins Been here for a year. Really like the job. I think the issue is aswell I just want everything to be perfect, where I should go with the MVP and see if we need the golden solution.
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