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My friend asked me to put a PC together for her(on paper) but she bought a notebook anyway by herself, the only thing that saved her from my anger is the fact that she made sure it matched the specs as closely as possible with what I put together for her... I just hugged her and complimented her because I was quite impressed by what she managed to do on her own.
"I can't work, my new computer is so slow. Please make it faster!"
I can't and won't make your computer faster, because you bought it yourself eventhough you said I should send you an estimate for a new one.
And the fucking software you complain about being slow is none of ours and neither did we install it you crackhead.
By the hammer of Thor, don't ever fucking call me again you shitpiece!
Next time you ask me for an estimate, I will give you my stump two-sided axe through your head while laughing hysterically.
rant
idiots calling for "help"