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Universal rule of opening tickets

Me: *opens ticket on basically ANY ticketing system EVER* (could be internal, from the customer, some random bug online, anything...).

Me: writes detailed explanation of issue, because I know working on tickets is hard. Of course I include that I tried steps A, B, C, and that I haven't been able to do D because of reasons.

Ticket derp: Comments...
"Hey, have you already tried A, B, C? Also you should totally do D first."

WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU? I TAKE TIME OUT OF MY FUCKING DAY TO WRITE THIS SHIT DOWN AND EVEN FORMAT IT NICELY, JUST TO MAKE YOUR MISERABLE LIFE EASIER, AND YOU DON'T EVEN READ IT YOU WORTHLESS LITTLE BALLSACK!? FUCK OFF!

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    Our ISP automatically creates a ticket when there is an outage at one of our locations, they also have that system when there is an open ticket which is untreated they give us a call asking about it. So every other day there would be some first level guy asking calling about the ticket and wanted to know what's up, eventhough THEY created the ticket..

    After the like 4th time talking to the same guy he realized what was happening most of the time. (If we really had an issue we usually wouldn't call first level support, but directly our salesman, so he would directly give it to the right technicians)
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