My manager thinks I am Superman! and he is so confident that can do any shit he wants me to do.

Yesterday he asked me to merge an ancient code hotfix (literally ancient) with latest branch of changes.

1. Hotfix is really old, most of the things are hardcoded, very specific to a stone age client.

2. Code documentation does not exist.

3. Developers of that code are probably dead.

4. Many Libraries which code uses are deprecated.

5. It's a legacy code, so no one has fucking idea what a particular clumsy block of code do, or what will happen if you remove it.

'if it runs don't touch it' policy by management.

Despite all this shit I successfully merged the the hotfix, refactored outdated code so as to run the application.

Showed this to my manager in full swag!

He was surprised at first, and asked me to show the code changes.

'Code review' was done by comparing files πŸ˜…

Manager: Dude, you have changed these lines, why? Explain.😧

Me: those lines won't work with new build, with new libs.☺️

Manager: then why can't you do old build with new changes?πŸ™„

Me: umm.. wait... what???πŸ€”

Manager: the code was working previously, it must be working even today without these changes.😑

Me: it was not working hence I made changes and now it's working fine see! ☺️

Manager: you have removed this, this and this!!! 😑

Me: but I also added that, that and that!πŸ˜”

Manager: "don't touch it' if it works!"😑

Me: ... Idk what to say!
(In the back of my mind: "Don't touch it even it doesn't works!")😌

  • 1
    @irene all Developers of that piece of code are resting in hell.
  • 3
    @irene how to tell your manager to fuck off gently without loosing job? πŸ˜…
  • 5
    @kalex You can be firm without being rude or insulting. You’re the developer. Your boss is just as afraid of losing you as you are of losing the job.
  • 2
    It's funny when I have smelly code with a strict "don't touch it unless it DOS", I don't touch it.

    Touching something while not touching it... Complexity will raise.

    And @irene is right. Stand your ground. Say it can't be done and explain why it can't. Chances are, he's not a total moron and will understand if you explain.

    If he's a total moron, why aren't you looking for a new job?
  • 0
    I think you meant "figuratively", otherwise this hotfix would have to date before year ~500 AD. It really grinds my gears that you go to the trouble of adding that additional note to clarify that your use of "ancient" was in fact not figurative.
  • 0
    @arraysstartat1 lexical nazi rant, yes!!

    So, as too much people, he uses literally to emphasize. And when this pattern redundancy becomes higher it tends to get on my nerves, as any redundant pattern.

    That being said, ancient also carries the sense of "so old, it/its creators disappeared". So, he might be talking about code so old that no one in his company was there when it was created.

    There is also this rhetorical form "hyperbole", to put emphasis on something but an extreme exaggeration. And that's a grammatical form.
  • 1
    @jotamontecino @arraysstartat1

    now you both literally crashed this thread...
  • 0
    There is a balancing act here that is, frankly, frustrating.

    We all want managers who know enough tech to understand when we explain things to them and then let us do our jobs but not ones who know enough tech to tell us how to do our jobs or try to do them for us.

    Or, failing either of those, managers who know we know tech and they know management and agree to stay on their side of the fence while protecting us on ours. These are the rare ones.
  • 0
    @jotamontecino Yeah, I get that figuratively "ancient" would mean very old code, like COBOL or even something like 10 years old. I'm not sure if saying "literally ancient" is correct choice if he wanted to put this much emphasis on how old it is. I think that left on default with figurative meaning would have been enough.

    There is also this issue with some people who think that AngularJS oraz Symphony1 are "ancient", just because those developers are most likely young and never had to work with those languages when "dynamic HTML" meant submitting form in guestbook. Really dilutes this term even further.
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