Just want to put it out here... reading this will waste ur time. :(

Having a serious crush on co-worker. I tried not to have a crush on him initially because he’s a colleague and he seems to be much older(max 10 yrs I guess). Age isn’t an issue but ppl say it’s not good to like someone from work.

But then he kept on glancing at me and caught him turning back to look into my cubicle at several occasions. Saw him looking at my direction across the room, hall, turning back to look when he was waiting at lobby, and all the way from smoking corner as well. Could be possible that he just happened to be looking in my direction several times.
Now, haven’t seen him since early feb because of the quarantine. Luckily, I chanced upon his number when everyone in the dept was put into the same chat channel for the Covid19 news. I had this urge to ask what was it all about because we’ve been told to wfh till further notice. Who knows what could happen to us during these period.

So tried to be brave and asked abt why he was looking into my cubicles several times, without coming out weird (I hope). His reply was “dont know”. I don’t know what to make of it. Could have been anything else but how could someone just reply don’t know.

Then came yesterday, my friend was telling me about her experience on tinder. Apparently she’s been using it for fun and she got funny texts from the guys there. So I decided to give it a try. Man, it was so fun swiping left all the way (cuz they couldnt be compared with work crush) till I swiped right for this older guy. We matched!
He was the first one to match, probably abt 5-10mins after I’ve finished setting up profile and all that. It was totally a new experience for me. I forgot abt my work crush in that moment. He had this minimalistic vibe. Didn’t smile much in his photos, gave me calm feeling and looked so cool. He put “Everything is good in moderation” in the bio. He’s the only one comparable for that work crush. Not sure who’s supposed to start saying hi. My friends said wait for the guy, so I waited.
Got a few other matches after him but didn’t like them as much as him. I finally decided to say hi. No respond till today. Given that he put Doctor for his occupation, I assumed he’d be busy. So I waited. Then sent another in late afternoon asking if he plays LoL often (he’s wearing LoL land yard in one of the photos). No reply.

I started to feel weird because this is supposed to be light and fun because who takes things seriously on tinder, right. They’re there to flirt and kill the boredom especially because of the lockdown. And I started to have serious feelings for this one guy whom didn’t even bother to reply. So decided to delete tinder for good. Sent him one final msg that I really wanted to get to know him and I thought he’s a really cool handsome dude. But now that I’ve deleted my acc, he wouldn’t even see my msg anymore.

His profile name is Randolf. I want to get to know him in real life. But is it illegal? :(

Thank u for read this far. I just didn’t know where to put all those feelings. And sorry for wasting your time with nonsense.

  • 5
    Who can blame you? Randy is a catch to say the least. Total thirst trap.
  • 1
    @SortOfTested u mean Randolf Guy?
    Really liked the name Randolf. Now not so sure if I liked the name or the guy, could be both. Now thinking to name my unborn child Randolf 🤔(creepy af)
  • 4
    That's why I waited until they were born to name them ;)

    Though, the first one ran the risk of being named, "MOTHERFUCKHELLWHYDIDINOTOPTFORANEPIDURAL?!?!?!?"
  • 0
    How old are you or how old is the guy? I know one guy who is most likely to use that name and also use the "I'm a doctor" bullshit to attract women.
  • 5
    Oh Lord I'm glad I'm married.

    I listen to this mess at work from all the young bucks and all the dating apps they blah blah blah about. I don't get it.

    A bit of advice about dating people from work, don't shit where you eat.
  • 0
    @SortOfTested wow! I didn’t know what was thirst trap till now. Had to duckduckgo to understand fully, very educational.

    As for the first one, he reminds me of Benedict cumberbatch. Has a sexy deep voice with British accent. I’ll now try to think of him doing thirst trap too.

    Now I feel much better. Thank you! ^^
  • 1
    @rutee07 the Randolf guy put age 32.
  • 0
    @lunadev Blond hair, blue eyes, square jaw, and 6'3?
  • 4
    For the feels and the hearts you get a ++
    Now, it would look like you have a type - older men. You sound like a sensitive soul also. We can't force people to talk to us. Besides Tinder there are other apps so just give those a try instead or do something else to get your mind busy and stop thinking about your crushes. It's also a good time to learn something new.
  • 2
    @PaperTrail I have no other life than work and home. Can u blame this young buck?

    @rutee07 This Randolf looks very Asian tho. He put 🇹🇼 🇨🇦
  • 1
    @lunadev Ah, then no, not him. :)

    Honest question, do people really fall for others that fast? What kind of "feelings" is it, exactly? I'm genuinely curious, not judging.
  • 1
    @iamai thank you ^^ will do. dev rant always keep this lost soul in track.
  • 2
    @rutee07 erm... im not so sure as well. I’d like to think myself as very choosy person. I don’t romantically like someone easily. Well, I don’t like humans easily. Always keep a distance, strictly professional and formal, especially at work.
    But this work crush, it was like an instant connection, sth that I couldn’t shake it off easily. And even when I purposely try to keep myself in check, when I looked again, he’d be looking at me. Then I think started to get attached more? Don’t know.
    And for Randolf Guy, I think I liked him cuz he sort of fits all the qualities that I was trying to replace.
    Guess I’m especially poorly gifted in this love dept. Better get back to learning new tech :D
  • 3

    >I have no other life than work and home. Can u blame this young buck?

    Oh no, not at all. I can't even imagine how you kids navigate single life.

    I try to give advice to the struggling young buck here, but its like "You mean, go out and meet people? Seriously? In public?"
  • 2
    @PaperTrail but it IS scary out there with people, whom I don’t really know. Making friends is ok but even with close friends, it hard to make time for each other especially when we don’t have common interest. Workplace seems to be most convenient place to get to know someone better. Seems navigating single life is easier than being attached? Don’t really know how to deal with another human, also don’t know how not to develop inappropriate feelings.
    Appreciate your advice. :D
  • 3

    >Appreciate your advice. :D

    I have failed *a lot*, so I'm sure it qualifies me for something . The advice I've given the fellas (and a lady or two) .

    - Don't shit where you eat.

    - To meet the 'right' person, its not going to be in a bar or anyplace designed specifically for folks not to be themselves. Volunteer. Volunteer at a hospital, Red Cross, an animal shelter, where ever. My dealings with folks at these places have been have been 1st class. They have been honest, care about people, and a heart for doing what is right.

    If you're just looking for fun+non serious (nothing wrong with that), gyms (yoga/jujitsu studio, spin class, etc), or any group related physical activity. Around our office, the jujitsu dojo is the new 'singles bar'. Its weird, but it works for them.
  • 0
    @PaperTrail oh then, going back to judo dojo shall be top of my list when this pandemic ends!
    I mean at least will be doing physical training and meeting some ppl. Will try volunteering as well.
  • 4
    Well I know a lady who's into me but when she discovered we're age mates she stopped giving me the shots anymore
  • 1
    Age-mate is a term I haven't heard in a long time.
  • 3
    @SortOfTested well she said beacuse she's 29 and I'm 29 then we can't date 🤣
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