12
rutee07
20d

I feel stupid.

I'm not familiar with any of the new tools we are using and there are so many concepts in web development that I know nothing about. I'm googling the shit out of everything, trying to cram other people's years of experience into my brain, and I feel like I'm annoying my colleagues.

All of a sudden, the compliments feel like "That's a good job for your level of understanding. I lowered my standards for you a long time ago." Yeah, yeah, it's dumb to overthink like that. Every time my manager wants to have a meeting with me, I feel like he's assessing if I'd still be useful in the future or adapting well into the new tools like, "Oh, you're learning too slow. Maybe we have to let you go and hire someone who's been using this and that a long time ago."

Please don't tell me it's impostor syndrome or some shit. I really don't know much about this side of the field and those set of tools. I learned a few during my months of stay here and managed to get my tasks done. I just want to vent because I feel like my team deserves a better developer and I'm trying to be that. I just can't help but wonder if they are better off with someone else.

Comments
  • 5
    Sounds like you are in dire need of a good spanking.
  • 2
    Snap out of it right now, baka!
    You are good as is. Try things one by one. There is no need to overcomplicate it if you go with plain JavaScript. Day-three of MDN and beginner articles, week of practice, and you'll fetch some useful stuff for your application.
    If you need assistance in JS, Vue and small libraries, I'm all ears: vintprox#2594 in Discord
  • 5
    You seem keen on learning, and for me as a teammate of yours, this would be more valuable than anything. At least you want to get better and bring your team forward.
    Don't stress too much about it.
  • 1
    Does it echo, in your head, when you start to think? 😛

    Yeah, you're dumb. Like the rest of us. (a smart one would become a stripper fresh out of high school. 💃)
  • 1
    @NoMad I thought the echo in my head is normal. Self doubt incoming.
  • 1
    @Benutzername brain 404? lol.
  • 1
    @NoMad 500, something went horribly wrong.
  • 0
    @Benutzername 🤣🤣🤣
  • 3
    Oh waw, so rutee07 has a sensitive side to him?

    I thought you're one od those pumped up programmers who cruise through life without any issues and always take the lead of projects

    I guess I was wrong. Nah listen, that feeling is normal, the question is how you respond to it. Do you shutdown, or do you take the iniciative

    I learn by inserting myself into all the issues the company is having and listen to the ones talking about it and provide rubber ducky ideas. And eventually it just sticks to you. Just put yourself into a spot where you need to use the tools you want to learn and do your job, the rest just happens
  • 0
    @Hazarth I knew that @rutee07 is sensitive since the rant he left about caring what will his coworkers think about finding dildo in his cabinet
  • 1
    Dude, front end web is fucking insane right now. I have done almost all backend for years, with some contributions to Mastodon (React).

    Don't fret. The new web frameworks and component based stuff and webpackers .. it's bonkers and insanely complex. I totally get your frustration, as someone who has done front end for over a decade before this modern JS framework era.

    It's not just you friend. The majority of developers have no idea how most of these pieces actually fit together.
  • 1
    I've been doing this for 20 years, as far as my non tech savvy collegues are concerned I am a magician, and I still feel this way. I decided that I don't get paid enough to worry about it. We drink beer on friday.
Add Comment