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After next 10 days i will be officially out of my student life phase and into the role of a adult, but my habits and mistakes are still that of a person i was 4 years ago. Even tody my poor decision making and practical skills are causing a pain to my loved ones , leading them to take charge, and i am so sad as to why i am the way i am. I wish i could know a way to change, to know of a way to grow.

Tldr : clg/uni fucks up with sudden notices. Immediate actions needed. My confused brain wants to react correctly and in a fail safe way,but confusion in choices leads to my old parents travelling 140kms.

Long version.

(Note 12 -2 days ago is not much relevant)

12 days ago
Situation in my state/country : heavy increase in covid cases by 90k each day, yet govt opening up and judiciary allowing markets/systems to open slowly

11 days ago
Univ drops a bomb : offline college exams for final yr would be happening in next 13 days if everything goes right. We would be giving the datesheet in next 2 days.
Le students:" wtf they can't take offline exams. What's going right? Situation is wrong as always... They bluffin (goes on creating twitter wars)
Le me : yeah its just a bluff

9 days ago : *no datesheet comes* *everyone quiet thinking univ got their brains on track*

8 days ago : univ drops "proposed" datesheet. Datesheet is exactly as they said : exams starting from 22nd, continuous , offline, in the college itself , at very early time

Le students : WTF! THEY REALLY GAVE THE DATESHEET? THEY WANNA KILL US? HOW CAN WE GO BACK TO COLLEGES ?WE DON'T HAVE TRANSPORTS!!? *Angry posts everywhere, but nothing is really happening*

Le me : hmm . Looks like its really happening. No probs. We will start from this monday. I have already some prep, we also have some interviews so Monday is good.

Monday comes . Goes on doing revisions, attending some inteviews,... Etc for next 5 days. Meanwhile i inform my parents that i will be having exams next week. They too busy to pay attention. I too engrossed in my stuff to think about a very important thing : HOW WILL I FUCKING GO?

So here comes the shit story.

Some event happens that brings attention of me , parents nd everyone else to the execution of exams by us.

Here is some maths.

- Exams to start : in next 4 days
- Exam start timings : 8.30 am.
- Examination gate closing time : 8.10 am
: . need to reach college by :7.30 am
- Distance between my home and college = ~70kms
- General route + timings =metro + bus + 3 wheeler = 1.3- 1 hr 40 mins
Thus to reach college using this route, need to get out of my home by : 6am

First metro on my route : 6.20 am

MATHS DOES NOT MATCH!!! I WILL BE LATE FOR MY EXAMS plus there are many unreliability factors like the unsafe nature of buses interms of covid, traffic etc.

So needed a different plan.

So when i thought about it, i immediately came up with an alternative solution. My friend presented me an option 2 and when my parents thought about it , they came with an option 3.

But i was so confused about all the options , that parents just got frustrated and took it to their hands.

Option 1 (mine) : i go by metro till the place from where i take the bus. From their i book a direct cab to college. Cost =$$$ but i will be somewhat safe from covid. Also risk of getting late is reduced as
Parents : nope/maybe. Still too much exertion + traffic risk

Option 2(friend) : i go by metro to the place from where i tske the bus. Friend has a car, will take both of us from there
Parenst Nope/maybe : traffic risk + what if friend gets late? He will run away without u.
Me : friend is responsible.

Option 3(parents) : there's an orphanage run by a known family friend that's at 4kms from my college. Let's shift you there for next 6 days. Mom will also stay woth you there
Me : nope/maybe. Lack of basic facilities ( table, wify) there. Plus mom can't go , her business will get disrupted . Also everyone would he taking the usual route, it won't be much exertion
Parents : mom has to go.. how will we be satisfied that you are staying safely there? The aunt there won't be able to handle your requirements.
Me : I DON'T HAVE ANY REQUIREMENTS! All i need is my mobile and copies and i cans study anywhere, eat anything.. plus we don't have time for all this. I think staying there is good planz let me shift tomorrow

Parents. : No,..okay...umm.. no we have to...
<Everyone confused and mostly angry at me>

======
At the end they decided that i should be staying home and they would be going first there to check. I feel bad that i couldn't give them the confidence in me to take such decisions, or criticizing the only correct risk free choice they gave to me.

[1/n]

Comments
  • 2
    You know the day when i first went to college for registration, my parents were with me and they started talking to some other guy's parents and forced me to make " friends with him", like some 5 yr old . It was suoer embarrassing

    But that guy turned out to be my most supporting and like minded loyal friend in last 4 years due to which my college life was a breeze.

    And today when last 5 days are left for the college they are again taking the pain to clear the hurdles in my path because i am still their baby child who don't know how to make decisions.

    And i am very sorry about that :""(

    2/2
  • 0
    this is very unlike my parents though. my parents never show up or show any interest in my schooling or the struggles of my schooling. all they want is a good report card at the end of a term or semester. they have even stopped asking for results... I know it can be somehow distressing when they try to takeover everything but it's almost the same when they let you do everything yourself. I really cant tell where to draw a line. if there is one actually. I know mistakes I have made when trying to take care of many things on my own which adds more to the pressure on me because I don't know how to explain it to them without getting the "cant you do anything on your own?" lecture and me replying with "it's your fault. you have never shown any interest at all". just let them be parents
  • 2
    Hm.

    The Covid thing is hard. Without a doubt.

    But your parents are over caring...

    Which is a thing that I'm very unfamiliar with... I grew up with grandma and after grandma came family war, since my mum and I had... vast disagreements.

    I want to spare you the cringe and me the necessity to hit myself with a wrench multiple times for several reasons...

    But sometimes... Parents are at least half right. They are afraid because you're afraid.

    It's hard to understand for most of us - but (even the bad) parents have a certain need to see their children succeed.

    (Unless they're really fucked up, but I think that your rant would be _waaaayyy_ different then)

    And reading your rant - if you called me in the same tone and I was your parent, I'd be really worried. 1h 40 m is a lot of time... And Covid. And traveling the distance.

    University degree - depending on country - means a whole lot, since there ain't many options otherwise...

    My advice (I stopped in the last rant intentionally) is to stop moping about the past.

    Reflect on it. Make better decisions in the future. Learn from the failures. Don't let them define your personality or yourself.

    If you don't want to drown - start swimming.
  • 0
    @IntrusionCM you are a lifeboat, thanks ❤️.

    And yeah i guess being a single child makes the parent child relation a lot more overcaring and emotional from both sides.
  • 0
    Go by bike. You still have time to make it.
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