After days of debugging server errors by tonnes of back-and-forth emailing with my hosting company, we finally arrived on the conclusion that I need to upgrade my account to be able to successfully execute python scripts.

This is apparently because when uploading files, they get encoded into a format that python doesn't like. APPARENTLY the ONLY solution is to create the files with the command line. How convenient that the command line is not made available to plebs not renting their premium package.

I guess this is what you get when paying the equivalent of $10 per year for web hosting.