Urrrrggghhhh I have an all hands meeting this afternoon and I just don't care...

Fuck yeah it just got cancelled!

This is the correct attitude.

TIL we are not the only ones who call it All Hands 🙌🙌🙌🙌🙌🙌

Wait… is this not discrimination against people without hands?

Whenever anyone organizes an "all hands" meeting they act like it's the most important thing ever, but literally everyone other than the organizer including others of the same rank always treats it like the least important meeting possible, less significant than even retrospectives.

Whenever I hear all hands, I imagine all of those hands jerking off

@lorentz so ours is a pretty chill arrangement, it's every other week started during covid. We're a small company (like 30 people), so it's kinda nice to hear what's going on but sometimes it's just a glorified patting people on the back when not much new is going on (like now)

@atheist We have a department meeting with 35 people every 5 weeks which is about "improving processes" aka. publicly humiliating everyone who fucked up significantly since the last one.

@lorentz shiiiiittttt that sounds like hell

@atheist Whoever's getting roasted can comfort themselves knowing that no one in the call is paying attention.

I guess it got cancelled, but was there going to be some consultants to help with efficiency?

We had one too and the organizer just didn't show up at all. Not sure what went wrong, but -1 meeting I guess xD