I think GDPR is a pain in the ass but my employer has lied to my doctors about my medical information so suddenly I really like GDPR.

To the housemate that wondered into the kitchen at 4am and turned the oven off at the perfect time for the chicken I'd forgotten about, thank you.

Signed,
Person eating not-burnt chicken

I need a polite way to ask someone if they're brain damaged.

Manager: Keep the debug logs
Me: I won't use them as I use the status report or run it manually to see the problem, but fine whatever.

1 week later

Manager: the debug logs are hard to read, the status report is hard to read too but it's a bit more concise
Me: Yes. The fuck you want me to do? I don't use logs and don't care. You can write code, make the logs more useful to you if you want to use them.

Running is good for sleep. I wish my lungs weren't fucked, but I ran anyway.

Ya know when you're working on a personal project, and you add a feature thinking it's a really good idea, then you don't touch the code for 6 months and it's still a good idea but you've got no idea what's broken and no idea what you need to do next?

So when we having an IRL meet? I think something was discussed a while ago.

If you don't test for it the bug doesn't exist.

"All due regards".

None. No regards are due. If you didn't work out I thought you lot were assholes from the body of the email, you're not going to work it out from the sign off, but still. You've got the social skills of a toothbrush.

I'd love to play poker with these people though. Can't bluff for shit.

Every year my work sends out a "mental health awareness week" email including some "useful resources" and the biggest problem for my mental health is those assholes.

I like coming up with novel passive agressive ways to say fuck you.

How can so many people be shit at their job, and all in one company?

Someone's going to be fired. Not me. When I joined my current company I was severely unwell. The survival rate for the state I was in was only slightly better than cancer (at 2 years less than 3 in 4 survive). I told work all of this. As far as I can tell they did nothing. As far as I can tell they didn't belive me. They've now got shitty about my performance and have actually asked for an independent review of my health. It is bad. It's significantly better than it was and it probably sounds worse than it is, but it is bad. They don't even know how much worse it was when I joined because they DIDN'T GET AN ASSESSMENT LIKE THEY WERE SUPPOSED TO. Someone is getting fired. HR hasn't responded to my emails since last Tuesday when they got the assessment. The only person that's said anything to me is my manager, he was in a bit of a grump last Wednesday (I don't think they'd told him yet) but he's being nice today, not a single word of criticism.

Someone is getting fired.

Manager: "add this"
Me: *adds the thing*

One week later:
Manager: "Remove this we don't want it anymore"
Me: Fuuuuuuuckkkkk

If I publish this I'll have to credit chatgpt.

Doing work disability paperwork. They've filled in paperwork saying they've provided all necessary and recommended equipment. I literally have paperwork of them declining to provide equipment recommended (and would have been paid for) by the government.

Fucking wild. Gonna be fun.

My company: "you don't have a choice what you work on"
My company on legal paperwork: "we've given them choice of what they work on to support and develop them as best as possible"

Both of those are verbatim quotes. I laughed. I mean, I now want to punch someone, but I laughed before the violence.

I feel like the social good of tech never really came to fruition. Like my local store can probably tell I have poorly managed ADHD from my irregular shopping schedule and caffeine/sugar addiction but all they use this info for is to try to sell me more salty peanuts.

The peanuts are tasty tho ngl

Pushed decrypted ansible vault to work repo. Time to cycle some s3 tokens.

Shithead manager.

Complaining that I'm a "senior" and he expects more from me (ignore that he's been making that complaint for 3 years and it's only been my job for less than 1)

Now complaining that I'm taking time to teach someone about something that they don't actually need to know.

I'm so fucking done with this job.

Wait, am I actually meant to read the code in your review? I just skimmed it and hoped it works. I also think you're an idiot so I accept these are conflicting positions to hold.

I hate to say it, I think Macs are going to beat windows. (update: or maybe Windows is just going to fade and the market will be split?)

Not better hardware, or value, or experience. Windows is just getting more and more ads.

I was thinking, gee I want something like Linux, but well supported hardware.

That's a Mac. Shit.

Happy "doubt every news story and reddit post" day

Dear HR,

You're so incompetent, had I followed your instructions I'd have broken the law and endangered my life.

Get fucked.

A.

I had a suggestion a week ago. I was told to do a different (simpler) approach. The current approach doesn't work and I'm about to point out the problem basically means I've got to go do what I originally said.

The same bit of shitty configure I wrote to make ansible work with MFA has been duplicated across a dozen repos and projects and someone has broken it because it doesn't work with their setup. Their setup doesn't follow company policy and that's why it's not compatible. But apparently we need to have a "discussion" to decide what to do...

Apparently one of the data scientists doesn't have write permission to main branch. I've got to review and merge. This is a stupid policy that's going to waste my time...

My manager decided to skip today's meeting because he micromanaged me enough last week.

Genuinely I don't know if that's growth...

My manager is complaining I'm committing broken, incomplete stuff.

Before my manager was complaining I didn't commit enough.

My manager is an asshole.

Someone's asking how we should do things and I want to say fuck it we ball, but apparently I'm senior or something so gotta instead say "whatever you think is sensible" then get told I should give my own professional opinion but I also just don't care.

Sad day for avoiding responsibility.