Compiled Gentoo after ~5 days.
It's not ever yet though.
My kernel is now 7.3M, and it contains almost everything I need. Even my network drivers (intel) firmware is built-in.
It boots straight off UEFI (default BOOT/bootx64.efi), and
Managed to install X, Waylan (sway!)
Got dvorak programmer's keyboard defaulted.
df -h:
root 4.7G/14G (exact) used
boot 21M/127M (exact) used
var 701M/~5.5G used

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRGHHHHHHHHH

Was doing the installation from a Live CD (UEFI) during school hours, with my toughpad not working and no mouse with me. I feel bad for TAB.

I am, at this moment, still compiling...