how depressing can life get....

Don't challenge it.

@Stuxnet thats exactly what i learned the hard way

@Jilano hhhh

@kgbemployee dont worry it is a rhetorical question

Life has itsups and downs. If you are at the bottom, it can only get better eventhough your current self might not want to believe it.

up to the point where death begins to genuinely look like the better option

and it can still become much worse beyond that

@jAsE jase i dont even want to know

Do you want to be happy?

@seewithsteve that is the only reason why i am alive and the only reason why i chose to remain to stay alive

@SukMikeHok Nice. I know it's quite a rhetorical question, but I've been in a similar position in life. When I asked myself this question, I answered; 'Of course I want to be happy.'. Yet, at the same time I didn't take the responsibility for myself to be happy.

Life only started to get better when I started to work on it. I watched a ton of personal development videos and read many books about Buddhism, psychology and other self-help material. I started a daily meditation practice. The objective there was to let go of all my negative thoughts. And at the same time to stop identifying with my body.

I realised we are so much more than a mere bag of skin on a mechanical planet. We are not the body, nor our minds. But that is not for you to believe or accept. You have to search for this inside.

I really recommend you to watch Actualized.org's videos on YouTube. And if that material is too much to deal with, listen to Alan Watts chillstep mixes. A different perspective will set you free

@seewithsteve a different perspective@will set you free

@SukMikeHok It's natural for you to reject any change. I know my perspective or my methods might seem ridiculous to you. You don't have to do anything like me. You know what to do to be happy. But it takes commitment and a will to change.

It's all in your hands. You can be happy right now. You just chose not to be.

@seewithsteve i do not have problems with change

@SukMikeHok Okay. That might be. I know nothing about you. Yet you feel the need to defend your position on this. Either way, I don't want to freak you out. Just want to let you know that you can do this. You can wake up smiling. Even when in the darkest of times.

You are a miracle brother and you deserve all the love and happiness in existence.