7
ngCry
76d

Would you just leave a company if you didnt feel respected by the manager?

I work at a small start up, and i usually let those small signs of disrespect pass by, mainly because i think i am imagining it and dont wanna make a fuss about it.

But last week at our daily the manager kind of yelled at me which is upsetting me even today. I don't mind criticizm at all, but i feel like this stuff should be said in private not in a meeting with 5 other devs with which i work every day.

Would you quit? Or am I making a drama about it?

Comments
  • 12
    Find something better first, then leave.
  • 2
    Yelling is never good and you should be able to tell your manager that that is an issue. It's a startup most of the times they have not managed before and they are finding out how to do things on the way.

    He wants to get criticized as well (if not he is just a shitty person)
  • 1
    if it's just the one occurrence then maybe let it slide but if it persists I would begin looking for something else. Everyone has their moments where they let their temper get the better of them and most realize it in hindsight on their own.

    The distinction is whether they either don't care or do it intentionally, or whether they try to make up for it later. You can try to talk to them, but a lot of people don't like being called out on their mistakes whether they feel bad about them or not, especially when they've already realized their error, so its really anyone's guess how that conversation would play out if you brought it up. Maybe at least wait til the 2nd incident 🤷🏻‍♂️
  • 1
    Personally I don't tolerate that kind of garbage. I had a similar thing happen to me a few years ago but it was in private. Long story short I wrote code, documented that it might not work under XYZ conditions and noted that the QA team should look further into it. Of course the product was released without the QA team looking further into it despite the fact that it was right there in the ticket and someone over there said it was good. I walked into the director of engineering's office to talk about it. Behind a closed door he ripped me a new one saying it was my fault. He yelled at me for a good 20 minutes. True or not, unacceptable: be hard on the problem, easy on the people. I hated that guy after that, which I later found out that everyone else did too. Did he honestly think I was going to go above and beyond for him after that?

    I would recommend trying to discuss it with him. How he reacts to your concern in private will be a big, big tell on what to expect going forward.
  • 1
    More information needed.

    Someone yelling at you isn't necessarily a sign of disrespect.

    If you worked in the armed forces, folk would be yelling at you a lot !

    In business, nothing really should be private, otherwise it hampers the flow of information.

    Eg. if you are trying to hide your faults from others, this is not good for the team !

    If you have faults (And who doesn't..), and everyone knows about them, folk can adjust their behaviours to help deal with them better, and some even can help you to improve.

    Hiding that is just a short term solution that benefits you.

    I'd say, take the medicine, learn from it, move on, as you will experience that many times in the future.

    Yelling, emotional outbursts, is just humans being humans, people will even throw things, so you need to learn to duck. :-)

    In less civilised industries, you get a thump if you aren't doing what you are supposed to.

    It's brutal, but its the coal face.
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