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Ok story of my most most recent job search (not sure devRant could handle the load if I was to go through them all)

First a little backstory on why I needed to search for a new job:

Joined a small startup in the blockchain space. They were funded through grants from a non-profit setup by the folks who invented the blockchain and raised funds (they gave those funds out to companies willing to build the various pieces of the network and tools).

We were one of a handful of companies working on the early stages of the network. We built numerous "first"s on the network and spent the majority of our time finding bugs and issues and asking others to fix them so it would become possible, for us to do what we signed up for. We ended up having to build multiple server side applications as middleware to plug massive gaps. All going great, had a lot of success, were told face to face by the foundation not to worry about securing more funds at least for the near term as we were "critical to the success of the network".

1 month later a bug was discovered in our major product, was nasty and we had to take it offline. Nobody lost any funds.

1-2 months later again, the inventor of the blockchain (His majesty, Lord dickhead of cuntinstein) decided to join the foundation as he wasn't happy with the orgs progress and where the network now stood. Immediately says "see that small startup over there ... yeah I hate them. Blackball them from getting anymore money. Use them as an example to others that we are not afraid to cut funds if you fuck up"

Our CEO was informed. He asked for meetings with numerous people, including His royal highness, lord cockbag of never-wrong. The others told our CEO that they didn't agree with the decision, but their hands were tied and they were deeply sorry. Our CEO's pleas with The ghost of Christmas cuntyness, just fell on deaf ears.

CEO broke the news to us, he had 3 weeks of funds left to pay salaries. He'd pay us to keep things going and do whatever we could to reduce server costs, so we could leave everything up long enough for our users to migrate elsewhere. We reduced costs a lot by turning off non essential features, he gave us our last pay check and some great referrals. That was that and we very emotionally closed up shop.

When news got out, we then had to defend ourselves publicly, because the loch ness moron, decided to twist things in his favour. So yeah, AMAZING experience!

So an unemployed and broken man, I did the unthinkable ... I set my linkedin to "open to work". Fuck me every moronic recruiter in a 10,000 mile radius came after me. Didn't matter if I was qualified, didn't matter if I had no experience in that language or type of system, didn't matter if my bio explicitly said "I don't work with X, Y or Z" ... that only made them want me more.

I think I got somewhere around 20 - 30 messages per week, 1 - 2 being actually relevant to what I do. Applied to dozens of jobs myself, only contacted back by 1, who badly fucked up the job description and I wasn't a fit at all.

Got an email from company ABC, who worked on the same blockchain we got kicked off of. They were looking for people with my skills and the skills of one other dev in the preious company. They heard what happened and our CEO gave us a glowing recommendation. They largely offered us the job, but both of us said that we weren't interested in working anywhere near, that kick needing prick, again. We wanted to go elsewhere.

Went back to searching, finding nothing. The other dev got a contract job elsewhere. The guy from ABC message me again to say look, we understand your issues, you got fucked around. We can do out best to promise you'll never have to speak to, the abominable jizz stain, again. We'll also offer you a much bigger role, and a decent salary bump on top of that.

Told them i'd think about it. We ended up having a few more calls where they showed me designs of all the things they wanted to do, and plans on how they would raise money if the same thing was to ever happen to them. Eventually I gave in and signed up.

So far it was absolutely the right call. Haven't had to speak to the scrotum at all. The company is run entirely by engineers. Theres no 14 meetings per week to discuss "where we are" which just involves reading our planning tool tickets, out loud. I'm currently being left alone 99% of the week to get work done. and i'm largely in-charge of everything mobile. It was a fucking hellhole of a trip, but I came out the other side better off

I'm sure there is a thought provoking, meaningful quote I could be writing now about how "things always work out" or that crap. But remembering it all just leaves me with the desire to find him and shove a cactus where the sun don't shine

.... happy job hunting everyone!

Comments
  • 0
    That is definitely too long, didn't read - i wait for the movie and hope it restrains itself to the classic 90 minutes plus 30 extra...

    But i wish you all the fame in your new job as an author - may you write the next Lord of the Rings.
  • 3
    "Joined a small startup in the blockchain space. They were funded through grants from a non-profit setup by the folks who invented the blockchain and raised funds"

    so you sold cocaine ?
  • 1
    Good for you, happy to hear that things worked out! Engineering companies ran by business school types is one of the 7 deadly sins imo
  • 0
    I don't think this person is alive anymore
  • 2
    @AvatarOfKaine no, selling cocaine is sssssooooo last year.

    We sold digital native, decentralised cocaine tokens, whose price is pegged against the real thing! Whenever the supply increased, decreasing the the price, our dedicated team of snorters would reduce the supply to ensure an always upwards trend.

    This was going to be a game changer for institutional investors, who previously had no access to the lucrative cocaine market
  • 0
    @practiseSafeHex I looked into to blockchain multiple times and see literally no value

    Even if a nn training wastes electric the model can be reused once properly trained blockchain is terrible
  • 0
    Count your blessings my man. Where I'm from, I've been seeing all my friends search for a job for over a year without any luck.

    I'm sure at least one of them will readily give up his kidney to be spammed with 20 semi relevant emails from employers.
  • 1
    @AvatarOfKaine there are a lot of evangelists ruining it tweeting very pie in the sky crap. And promoting NFT projects that are way over priced.

    Behind all of that is a platform that makes it a lot easier to build a secure and stable application much easier. Also systems that allow the users to vote on changes. And the entire thing is open source allowing people to put forward changes

    Take away all the nonsense and it’s a very powerful platform. Devs have built lending systems like banks, but with a fraction of the fees

    There are also many chains not as power hungry as Bitcoin and Ethereum. That problem will hopefully go away in the future
  • 0
    @RexGalilae when someone is looking for a job, I can assure nobody wants to be spammed with irrelevant job posts

    Rather than upskill on something new to make myself more appealing, or work on a take home challenge, or search for myself. I’m spending an entire day a week reading specs and explaining to recruiters how they’ve fucked up, in the hopes they’ll leave me alone next time. Nobody wants that while looking at their bank account drip down
  • 0
    @practiseSafeHex FWP 🤷‍♂️
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