Turing Test Time

I'm alone and my friends have died. A year has passed and I think about them every day. There are few people I can interact with and one day I speak to someone who tells me things I have never heard that keep my attention.

How do I feel during and after our conversation ?

Additionally my child get second place at a tournament, how do I feel about it.

Will you ever feel the same ?

I would love to kill my self. Really.

There are 2 things which prevents me from doing that :
1. My mother. She would take it really hard if I die before her
2. My 2 closest friends. I think It can destroy them if I kill my self.

But honestlly ? I have no joy in life, I code, but just to code, I don't go out, I don't like anything involving other people. I can't even imagine relation with a girl (Well, hookers are here for the needs)

Might as well just end it.

This is how I view what they have done.

https://youtu.be/lHw-6AZvZ7I?t=69

the evil villain part.

@NoToJavaScript I wander around in the freezing code because years ago evil people wasted my time learning to pretend to be like me and left me with no proof and continually repeated the same process causing me to forget everything and have wasted a large portion of all our lives for literally no valid reason

I was an innocent enough man with ordinary sexual and motivational properties

These people are all Freakish garbage
All I do is walk around and while i could probably fuck the women if I tried hard enough I’m afraid they’re evil child rapers and would get what they want if I did