186

Welcome back to practiseSafeHex's most incompetent co-worker!

*sitcom audience cheers*

Thank you, thank you. Ok so far we've had a developer from hell and a CEO who shot to fame for being the first rectum to receive a passport and be given a job.

2 pretty strong entrants if you ask me. But its time to slow it down and make sure everyone gets a fair chance. Its not all just about the psychopaths and assholes, what about the general weirdo's and the stoners who just made life awkward?

So here we go, Most incompetent co-worker, candidate 3, "A".

"A" was a bit of an unusual developer, despite having a few years experience in his home country, he applied for an unpaid internship to come work with us ... probably should have rang alarm bells but hey we were all young and dumb back then.

I had to say I felt very bad for A, as he suffered from 2 very serious, and job crippling personal conditions / problems

- Email induced panic attacks
- Extreme multifaceted attachment disorder (also known in layman terms as "get the fuck away from me, and do your job" syndrome)

While he never openly discussed these conditions, it was clear from working with him, that he had gone undiagnosed for years. Every time an email would come in no matter how simple ... even the services team asking to confirm his staff ID, would send him into a panic causing him to drop everything he was doing and like a homing missile find me anywhere in the building and ask me what to do.

Actually "A" also suffered from a debilitating literacy issue too, leaving him completely unable to read our internal wiki's himself. Every week we had to follow a set of steps to upgrade something and every week to mask his issue, he'd ask me what to do instead ... no matter how many times I sat with him previously ... must have been truly embarrassing for him.

But "A"'s finest moment in the company, by far, was the day where out of the blue, at the top of his voice (as if wearing headphones ... without wearing headphones) he asked

"DO YOU KNOW ANYONE WHO SELLS POT?"

... why no, manager of the entire department standing behind you, I do not

... why no, tech lead talking to manager, I do not

... why hello 50% of my team staring at me ... no "A", I do not!

Needless to say all our team meetings were a little awkward for the next few weeks after that but hey who doesn't like being thought of as a stoner / drug dealer by their team mates huh?

Will A make it to the top of the list of most incompetent? Well he has some truly logic defining competition yet to be announced.

Tune in later for more practiceSafeHex's most incompetent co-worker!!!

Comments
  • 19
    godaaeem man. Such a career XD
  • 9
    I'm loving these, and actually hoping for your sake they're not true...

    Otherwise, you have a lot more patience than I would have had.
  • 16
    @Admin-who @michaelrosmane

    This is all 100% true and more shockingly from the time A joined the team until I handed in my notice with R (different company) is only 1.5 years.

    Theres another 4 / 5 years left to discuss, its going to be an exciting week!
  • 10
    This is great!
    10/10 would watch
  • 10
    @practiseSafeHex your ++count is interesting.
  • 14
    One step closer to hell
  • 5
    This is just getting better...
  • 10
    @theNox @ewpratten

    Well as you can see form the rants, I have been developing in hell for quite some time. This is now just the badge of honour to confirm it
  • 2
    Man you took so much time to make part 3. I'm getting addicted to this, I need a story every hour.
  • 10
    I am hooked to this series more than breaking bad.. 😂😂

    Btw I am keeping track of the names of people too.. Until now its TRA_____.. Waiting for that surpise too.. 😅
  • 3
    @bitsnpieces glad I’m not alone with the name thing either hahaha
  • 3
    @bitsnpieces you are in for a horrible surprise when you realise I wasn't clever enough to think of that, and i'm literally just using first initials lol

    I might just start making them up to spell out something now
  • 3
    Kinda feel bad for this guy. Seems like he has some serious mental issues
  • 2
    Damn. But the real question is... do you know if anybody does?
  • 2
    And this is quality content!
  • 0
    Dude you are killing me, this content is rad!
Add Comment