I think I might be using weed and social medias to cover for my depression

There's nothing as good as feeling normal, sober, if you prefer to be high more often than not, something is wrong. But you have ADHD afaik. That can be related. Is the married life too boring for ya maybe? No gays that steal your phone anymore like in the old days :(

@retoor I don't know she's driving me mad.

On friday night, she cames back at 10pm, she starts cooking. I'm like "don't you wanna do it tomorrow", she's like "NOOO I'M GOING TO THE LIBRARY IT HAVE TO BE DONE NOW". Then she got mad at me for being silent (like bitch it's 10PM I'm about to go to sleep) and then the food was meh and she left a huge mess.

Then the day after I'm like "Ok I'm gonna clean up", and she arrives and start cooking AGAIN and mess up things I just cleaned up. So we had a huge fight.

And then the day after, it was kindof ok, I started cleaning AGAIN and AGAIN she came and started cooking, even though I was like "please let me do my part of the works", but no, I had to do groceries, and cut things, and help her, and then she's like "WOW YOU'RE NOT DOING ANYTHING".

I'm out of money because she doesn't give a shit about money and if I dare to say "hey maybe we can, you know, not spend everything" she gets mad and call me cheap. Now I owe 30k in backtaxes

@retoor he wasn't gay he was black

ffs I just wanna clean my goddamn house without having somebody messing things up as I'm doing it, is that too much to ask? She's not working, she have the whole fucking week to cook things.

She doesn't have to work to your schedule.

Though why are you cleaning up for her, particularly if it upsets you?

@MammaNeedHummus I mean I want a clean environment and to do my part of the work. I don't wanna be some lazy ass idiot who let his woman do everything.

And no she doesn't but it drives me mad that I'm trying to clean, that she wouldn't let me clean and that she's then telling me I'm not doing enough. It's like she's doing it for power.

I want to clean? Instead of letting me do it, she have to stay and give me directions and do some other shit. I kindly asked her to stay in bed, you can't be nicer than that.

@antigermgerm sounds frustrating.

Tell her you're frustrated and ask is she is too, and ask for help fixing it. Pair program the solution

@MammaNeedHummus we do have a hard time communicating without getting mad at each other :/

@MammaNeedHummus it's more than frustrating, it's breaking my heart seriously. I'm depressed to the point I can't work right, yesterday I broke shit and the things I was supposed to demo were not working

@antigermgerm 🫂

Have you tried the help from those who've trained (and qualified hopefully) to help people communicate (i.e. councillors etc).
Deliberately chose that phrasing instead of just getting straight to 'couples therapy' as people see it as a dirty word

Hope improves for you both ♥️

@MammaNeedHummus I stopped because of money.

Money is a huge deal between us, like she doesn't get that I struggle and I'm struggling partly because of her. I don't wanna make her feel bad about it but she doens't involve herself in our finances at all and i'm the one constantly playing the police. Which is not a role I want to play but I have to

@MammaNeedHummus thanks darling we'll get through :)

@antigermgerm your kind doesn't admit if a black person steals a phone so I don't believe it 😂

@antigermgerm if you guys make a deal about who cleans and who cooks it's clear what everyone does right? Seems that you guys just need some structure and role assignment. If you want, you can make things work with 90% of people. How do you think arranged marriages work (it's considered a successful way of marriage)? People can make it work if they have to. Sadly, my ex was the other 10%. Just crazy. Besides one, I had never fights in relationships. I cut a lot of slack myself.

I don't think it's a good idea to find professional help. It's better to have a good friend that knows you to discuss such things. If you don't have the type of friends to discuss such things maybe it is an option indeed. With my dad it's impossible to speak about feelings or whatever. He doesn't feel things, he does things. He doesn't seem to struggle ever. That's cool for him, but 100% worthless on emotional level. Besides that, best dad ever. Gave good values and has done a lot for me.

@retoor honestly, i think i was stoned and it felt behind the couch

@antigermgerm no, you were high of ketamine in someone's car IIRC. A CAR! FROM A CARTARD 😕

@retoor nah that was a different night. Yes he was gay. No I didn't lose my phone that night I just was extremely weird.

And apparently the guy freaked out because his best friend died of ketamine abuse. Apparently at the end he was removing some little piece of bone out of his non-existent nose so he could snort a little more

@retoor the fact that he was gay cancels out the fact he's a cartard. Come on it's SJW 101