How do you survive those days of pure despair, when you just want to hide or run away, when everything you do seems meaningless? How do you find the strength to keep moving forward when the voice in your head keeps asking "what's the point?"

I hoped this would go away (or at least get easier) with age, but here I am, almost in my thirties and still haunted by the same thoughts I've had since I was a teenager.

  • 4
    Met with friends and get wasted. Or slept. Or bought something good that I like. Or watched series. Or read mangas.

    Well whatever I did, I always have this in my head and probably the most helpful thing for me. This is not the first time I have felt this. I have been there, I have done that. And here I still am.

    Just sharing my experience ✌️
  • 3
    Fuck those days!

    Grab a beer, a tub of ice cream, and binge watch some dumb TV series. Tomorrow will be better, if even just a little.
  • 5
    Repeat after me:

    I deserve to be happy now.

    Seriously. Don't put your happiness on hold for some major life event. Graduation, getting a job, paying off your debt, getting married, having children, buying a home, etc. For two reasons.

    1) None of those things will magically transform you into a happy person. They're happy events, but their effects will fade.
    2) You will never be compete. You will never be done. There will always be something looming on the horizon that you want to get done. That's a guarantee.

    Do things today to allow yourself to be happy. If you don't, then you will grow to resent almost everything.
  • 3
    Even the most religiously devout will tell you that life is not supposed to be miserable. Happiness is not a reward for suffering or achievement. It's a prerequisite for success and functionality.
  • 3
    Occasionally the same demon will enter my thoughts if I've had a stressful week. I would recommend this: life isn't a race, it's a marathon. Take a break out of the week to recharge, take a walk, meditate, etc.

    I've generally found that it gets worse if I'm about to encounter a major life change such as me graduating college this year + a major job change. That's a lot to take in at once. Eventually the stress got to me enough that I ended up becoming a practicing Buddhist, but I'm not saying it's a solution for everyone.

    Hang in there man.
  • 2
    Porn, meds, exercise, taking a break and doing a context switch, bringing the pain forward by facing the dreaded thoughts and questions right there and then, reading, drawing, taking a long walk during dusk, listening to poets reading their own poems, watching movies (blockbusters, cult classics, artsy-fartsy), seeing how bemused we all are, in our own particular ways, shrugging and/or laughing at how absurd it all is, finding meaning in finding meaning, etc, etc.
    Some days are bullsh, some days aren't. Myself, I try and aim at that sweet spot of caring just enough to keep going.
  • 1
    @Bitwise I don't believe in any higher power, although sometimes I think that nature/life is just too... perfect... to be just a result of some random factors. Anyway, I'm not in the mood for this conversation right now. We can pick it up some other day if you want to.
  • 2
    Thank you all for your words.

    @Condor and @bahua you two specially.
  • 0
    @Bitwise don't worry, you didn't make it worst. I'm sorry if I gave that impression.

    My mother is atheist, so I was raised without any religious influence, which means faith doesn't mean much to me. Instead, since she is a biology teacher, I grew up with a good understanding of how life/nature works in a scientific/biological point of view.
  • 1
    @Bitwise so, to me, life isn't worthless even without hope, because all life is precious.
  • 1
    @shellbug if you recognize the life of others is as precious as your own life then you may be inspired by trying to inspire others. Try to make someone laugh, or show them a solution to their problem. You may indirectly see a way out from your own.

    It's way easier to see through others than ourselves. And they may end up helping you see something about yourself that isn't true and hiding the light within.
  • 1
    No need for overly religious or anything like that. Just honest questioning of your beliefs by trusted friends can help you get unstuck from repeated untrue thoughts. What is real? That which is real withstands questioning. That which isn't falls away. Truth is much kinder than we give it credit for.

    Once negative thinking is lessened or gone for a while you can see and feel better and that frees up the energy to be able to enjoy, be creative and make your own meaning whatever you want it to be. If you journal or have people that can point out to you when you get like that and remind you it doesn't last forever you could see that pattern in yourself and realize it is like the weather a passing storm cloud.
  • 3
    One hour at a time
    One line of code at a time
    One cup of coffee at a time
    One swig of whiskey at a time

    That's how i do it. It doesn't make sense, but most things don't. You tend to get to a place where things affect you lesser and lesser.
Add Comment