37
dufferz
6y

Question!

I am 26, and recently diagnosed with autism. An incredibly late diagnosis due to my absolutely amazing ability to keep everything internal.. It has caused my countless headaches and heartaches over the years and its good to finally understand what it is thst makes me how I am...

I am also aware that IT goes hand in hand with autism due to our thought process being so 'logical' and our acceptance of failure is.... Er... Not the best. But we also have the stubborness/determination to keep going, learn what it is we did wrong and improve upon it.

So my question really is, are many of you on the spectrum also? If so, are there any coping strategies that you can share with me/everyone who reads this?

By coping I don't mean just dealing with it, but I mean in the workplace. I've never had a job formally in IT because I never did any qualifications in it. Rebuilt my first pc at age 7 and been hooked since.

I have always been a mechanic because again, logic reasons.

I'm currently in contact with an organisation here in Norway called 'Unicus' who are specialised in employing people on the spectrum, specifically in the IT sector... Have any of you heard of them? They seem promising to me

Thanks for reading guys and please feel free to delete this if this really isn't the place for it, I just feel that within this community there are more of us and I would like to open the door for communication

Comments
  • 5
    You are aware enough to wonder about this. I would venture to think that you will be more than allright. I have worked with autistic people before(aspergers) and would rather work with them again than with the densw motherfuckers that I've had in other places.

    You'll do just fine my dude.
  • 4
    @AleCx04 thanks for the input, it is appreciated.... It wasn't my idea to post about it, my SO helped me write it and gave me the confidence to ask others
  • 2
    I'm not sure if this is a bad statement to make but from my perspective there seem to be a sweet spot for humans that sits somewhere on the autism spectrum between high functioning logical reasoning and absolute social panic. I'd be happy if the bulk of humanity was a bit more autistic. I think it would make for a better world in general.
  • 0
    @DeadInside I muchly agree! I feel there are too many people who could learn so much more and better themselves
  • 0
    Answer!

    I am fine with autists. I even had a friend who was an autist. He became an autist when he was born. When he was outside of his mum's vagina (ffs that sounds so wrong dude... ewww), his body was full with water inside which is normal, but he still had it after a lot of clapping on the back.
    It bothered me that he wanted my attention almost all the time, but thanks to him I learned to have a lot of patience.
  • 0
    @-ANGRY-CLIENT- you've completely confused me lol. I will consider what you said about attention though. I have been know to be clingy
  • 1
    Watch the netflix documentary "dark net" it has one episode where they talk about a programme in USA dedicated to gain autistic people into programming
  • 0
    @wateringdisease thankyou for the advice I will watch it tonight :)
  • 4
    @dufferz 26 huh? I was diagnosed at age 15 (in the middle of high school)

    ...

    I know people who were diagnosed at the age of 2. If I was diagnosed sooner I would have understood my problem earlier, but I probably wouldn't have grown independent.

    As far as advice and coping mechanisms:

    1. Learn the rules of your work/college quickly. You're not in childrens' school anymore you have to be competent. (ask important questions)

    2. Whenever I remember something embarrassing I usually have to distract myself to snap out of it. Usually I can do this rather simply by asking a question.

    3. Eye contact. If you're not used to it already; practice being able to look at someone's face. If they have something really important to say you should look them in the eye.
  • 5
    4. Learn about situational awareness. i.e: If someone is walking away, it's a bad time to start conversation.

    If someone asks, "how are you?", lie. "I'm good/I'm okay/I'm great."

    If someone asks you multiple choice question and you have no solid answer. Say, "I don't know." Do not spend 20 minutes trying to decide in front of them.

    I can't think of anything more at the moment.
  • 2
    @JohnScott thankyou very much for this!! This is the type of answer I was hoping for, it is much appreciated. People don't understand the 'obvious' social signals that we miss
  • 2
    @dufferz Yep.

    I remember how in sophomore year, a friend informed me about a girl who had a crush on me.

    They were like, "She likes you. Couldn't you tell?" I replied, "No. What are you talking about?!!!"

    I was completely oblivious 😂
  • 1
    @Haxk20 had a variety of online quizzes to do and generally quizzed me about my life, assessed how I reacted to him over 6 sessions and at the end I was told to wait for a letter
  • 3
    While not really relevant to your question, I have a 7 year old who is on the spectrum. He is also high functioning. He is very bright, considered savant, but doesn’t show it often because he usually just says random silly things.

    I like to read/learn about high function adults on the spectrum. I often worry about him and what life will be like for him.

    I know that he understands much more than he lets on. Mostly I worry about how other people might treat him, or him having difficulty making & keeping relationships. He is a very sweet boy.

    I wish the best for you. I know we understand much more about autism now than ever before. I hope you can get the resources and support you need.
  • 0
    @KimberlyTheGeek thankyou so much for your input, and i wish you and your son the best in life.

    If I can give you any advice the only thing I can say is to keep him feeling worthwhile and like he is not an issue for you.

    I say this because I haven't talked to any members of my family for 4+ years because I genuinely can't face it. They always insulted me and made me feel worthless, now I'm alone and in a different country.

    All of my relationships with women have ended badly due to my lack of communication and incredibly hard to read body language. Combined with the fact of instead of 'lashing out or having an episode' it's internal, one too many bad days have ended in me locking myself in my room many times and punishing myself. I shan't say how.
  • 1
    Actually, I don't think that I have autism. But I had a lot of heartches especially with my relationships more closer because when I reach the point, I treat them using my logic thinking and not considering my emotions with them, unconsciously.

    After I found that with my SO, I started to go at psychologist and after three months I progressed a lot, first building my own happiness and then sharing with the rest.

    Since childhood, I always been a introverted person. Also, kinda rejected on the highschool so my lack of expressiveness was very deep earlier on my life.

    From my side, I encourage you to try express yourself to the team, even if you think do that is irrelevant, the only way to be more person and less robot is communication. Also do nature gestures when the situation is appropriate, keep eye contact, handshakes, smirks, any gesture.

    Also one thing that helped me a lot, was to put social objectives (like go hang out with someone that normally I dont but I always thought about it) and complete them like tasks. A simple check for people like us is very satisfying.

    Work in your emotions and not in your brain, cheers!
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