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kiki
24h

I am the keeper and protector of a specific joke I made up while at rock bottom, that is so dark (vantablack levels of darkness), cruel, insensitive and inappropriate in any context to any person, that I'll probably never tell it to anyone.

It's clean. It's not about sexism, racism, religion, war, discrimination, rape and other sensitive topics often joked about. It's also not gross --- it won't make you vomit. It's not personal and doesn't doxx anybody.

I don't even know if I can tell it at any dark jokes contest without being kicked out immediately.

I'll give you just one hint: it's about being in the wrong place at the wrong time. There is no plot twist like "this place is your mom's vagina" --- nothing like that. It's just about being in the wrong place at the wrong time.

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  • 5
    23h
    The right man in the wrong place can make all the difference in the world. Wake up, kiki. Wake up and smell the ashes.
  • 6
    23h
    Is it as bad as when I went to my group of friends in school and asked the group "hey, when was the last time you considered suicide?"
  • 1
    23h
    @BordedDev it's not "bad". there are contexts when saying "when was the last time you considered suicide" is appropriate, namely when you're a therapist who's talking to your suicidal patient. Also, your joke will be at home in cards against humanity.

    The sinister nature of my joke is that for years now I can't think of a single scenario where uttering those words would be appropriate, or at least expected
  • 1
    23h
    Getting Final Destination vibes.
    Related: the artist "Lous and the Yakuza" has a song called "Hiroshima" in which she sings (in French) "You are my little bomb, you explode like Hiroshima". The first time I heard that I was baffled at how outrageous that sounds.
  • 5
    22h
    go on tell it, we're waiting.

    And if you're not going to, why bother hyping it up?
  • 2
    19h
    @BordedDev huh? Not that weird question honestly.
  • 2
    19h
    @SidTheITGuy indeed, it's not that there is a moderator. Kiki, build a bot network sharing this a few thousand times. I'm sure you get away with it.
  • 3
    18h
    The jokes I won't tell online are pedophile jokes my brother told me when I was 10. Also, at that age my brother exposed me to audio recordings that sounded like a pedophile uncle molesting a young child. To this day I have no clue if it was some dark humor or the real thing. Later in life I learned what a snuff film was and realized those audios my brother had might actually be real. If it was real who knows if they killed that child.

    I also learned later in life why people were being abducted. Some of the sickest shit you will ever come across. Way worse than JS on backend.
  • 1
    17h
    @YourMom no, mine's not of that kind, not even close
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