15
iAmNaN
6y

I JUST HAD ONE OF THOSE DAYS THAT MAKES ONE WANT TO BANG TWO BRICKS ON HEAD SND END THE PAIN THE STORY STARTS YESTETDAY WITH ISSUES AFTER A MIGRSTION AND THEY ASK ME TO HELP TROUBLESHOOT EVEN THOUGH I'M A DEV DBA AND THE ISSUE IS IN QA/SAT AND I HELP ANYWAY AND THEY CAN'T FIND A VIEW AND SO I LOOK EVERYWHERE AND CAN'T DOING IT EITHER AND IT DIDN'T EXIST IN PROD OR DEV SO I TELL THEM IT'S NOT THERE, AND THEY ARE LIKE, CAN YOU RETRIEVE IT FOR US AND I'M LIKE FROM WHERE? I DON'T KEEP VIEWS IN MY BUTT AND YOU GUYS ARE SMOKING CRACK AND THE GIVE ME THEIR QUERY WHICH CONTAIN THE VIEE ANYWAY AND THEY SAY CAN YOU RUN IT AND IT RUNS AND WORKS AND THEY CAN'T MAKE IT WORK AND IT WORKS BECAUSE IT DOESN'T CALL THE VIEW THEY HAVE ME SO NO PROBLEM THERE SO I FINALLY ASK THEM ARE YOU POINTING TO THE CORRECT DATABASE AND THEY'RE LIKE OH MAN WE TOLD YOU THE WRONG DATABASE AND SO I LOOK AT THE RIGHT DATABASE AND FIND THAT THE GRANTS ARE MISSING AND YEAH THANK YOU FOR TAKING EIGHT HOURS OF MY LIFE BECAUSE WE WERE IN THE WRONG DB YOU GAVE ME AND I HOPE THE FLAG OF A THOUSAND CAMELS INVEST YOUR ARMPITS AND THE CHIGGERS OF A THOUSAND SOUTHERN LAWNS INGEST YOUR SOCKS AND UNDERWEAR. YAAAAAA!!!!

Comments
  • 1
    Sir, what’s your connection string?
  • 1
    Relax take a deep breath. Breath in. I get payed for this shit. Breath out. Repeat.

    😁
  • 2
    @M1sf3t Hope there is a whisky bottle on the bottom of that brown paper bag
  • 2
    eat a snickers :D
  • 1
    Paragraphs would be appreciated
  • 3
    paragraph?
    It's a classical example of "stream of consciousness": a narrative mode or method that attempts "to depict the multitudinous thoughts and feelings which pass through the mind" of a narrator [Wikipedia]

    In this case, anger, shit, shit, wtf, wtf, wtf, kill kill

    I found it also an aesthetically nice rant to look out, with everything so uppercase. Like a wall of solid fucking anger and frustration
  • 1
    @redman he is a DBA that there is pure pinky finger strength.
  • 1
    @iAmNaN with profile change and the pop off, going off right there

    did you go super saiyan?
    sorry you have to deal with this btw

    @deviloper I agree, this is a properly executed wall of text
  • 0
    daughter 1: Why is my name Rose?

    dad: Because when you were born angel a Rose fell on your herad.

    daughter2: Daddy why am I named Lilly?

    dad: When you were born a lilly fell on your head.

    daughter3: BLAAARFFPGLARBGLAAHHGPPHGAH???

    dad: SHUT THE FUCK UP CINDERBLOCK!
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