I'm feeling very bad for the choice I make...

TLDR: I started looking for a new job, just because the salary wasn't enough. Talked with my boss, he agreed to raise it and I agreed to stay. Two weeks after that (today) I talked with him and told I will be leaving.


Starting January, just arriving of three weeks on vacation in another country to see my girlfriend, I started looking for my first house, to live with my girlfriend. Because of this future life (she arrives March 13th), I started to look for a new job which pays more. By now, I have worked there for the past three years.

At the end of January I found a house and had some good proposals, so I talked with my boss that it was possible for me to leave in the near future because I really needed the money, despite really liking to work there, so he made me a proposal to give me the increase I wanted (250€) and I agreed.

Just after that, I started calling the companies to say that I would not be available anymore. I usually try to be the most honest as possible with these things.

Past a week, I was talking face to face to a recruiter to say the same thing, but this time he increased his past proposal and showed me the company he wanted to send me; it was one of the unicorns of Portugal and with a really really great technology stack, and after convincing me that I could be wrong about the decision I had made (well... I recognize I can be wrong sometimes), I agreed to go in a meeting with the company.

Past Thursday I went there - Well... I was wrong. I really loved the culture of the company (the thing I most like in the one I'm right now), I would be working with a great technology stack, and having a really good salary.

Today I talked with my boss and said I will be leaving in April 23rd. He told me that didn't think it was right the way I handled this, because, if he knew with some antecedece, he wouldn't have made a proposal for a new development that only I could do (I did the analysis for it), and would be searching for a replacement sooner.

Right now I'm 22 years old, junior developer, going to live with my girlfriend in the next month, and the only one in the company who knows PHP with its stack (Linux, MySQL, Apache).
Before all of that I had a net salary of +- 750€, and it was increased to 950€ after the proposals, and in this new position it will be 1150€.

I don't know how to feel. People usually said that I have to start thinking a little bit more about myself (my bosses included) and I tried this adviced... :(

  • 2
    Job changes can be really hard. Don't worry. As long as you did good work at your previous company, and like the new company, it's all good! It's very hard to do it the "right way"! And everyone's definition of right way is self serving. You'd have regretted not accepting the new proposal anyway!
  • 2
    As long as you give reasonable notice, you shouldn't feel too bad. It's almost a 20% raise at a higher profile company. He should be happy for you.

    P.s. Portuguese is always a trip for me when I see it in writing, makes my brains cell work in a way they don't usually have to.

    My brain: antecedece... antecede... notice! >.<
  • 2
    Don't give yourself a hard time. Put the personal thing and feelings aside, it's just a contract.
  • 0

    You have a really good point. I hadn't thought about it that way.
  • 1

    Yeah... The problem is that I could have gone there by my company recruitment area, too. He probably felt bad for me just leaving, a little bit out of no where. I feel bad, too, but I understand his point of view.

    Ps: We do have lots of words that have similar etymology with English, but most of not so much :D
  • 0
    My brain reads it first as spanish, thinks, "that's not quite right," then tries for english
  • 1
    Two month's notice is almost too long. I don't know what it said in your contract but it's stupid for your boss to criticize you about it.
  • 0
    Its weird to see this economical income difference!
  • 0
    You're feeling bad for somebody who would replace you in a heartbeat if they found someone cheaper.
  • 0
    Also if he loved and valued you that much he would have been paying you more from the beginning. He's probably sad because it's difficult to find someone as good and young as you, willing to settle for subpar payment. Don't let him guilt trip you, he's your boss not your mom. I've changes jobs several times and I've never regretted it.
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