How lawyers fuck up technology!

I rented a car today, given that I don't want to go by train currently. That was some VW Golf, and it had a lane assist which can't decide whether to be helpful or obnoxious:

Either I kept the steering wheel and still steered myself, in which case the lane assist's actions made the steering feel somewhat wobbly. Initially, I suspected a worn out control arm bearing, but that's a long term damage in aging cars, not in new ones.

Or I just rested my hands on my upper legs, as I usually do (palms facing upwards and holding the wheel lightly), then the lane assist worked by itself. It was even smart enough to deactivate itself upon blinking before changing lanes.

However, it complained after about 15 seconds that I didn't steer. I said, shut up and do your job. The warning intensified, and I said, fuck you. Then it initiated some stutter braking to wake me up. Annoying like a reincarnation of Clippy.

I ended up giving the steering wheel a slight tip to the right every 15, 20 seconds just to let the lane assist know I was still there, relying on the lane assist to correct it again. On a long trip, I would have had to deactivate that crap.

Obviously, the VW engineers did their job, but the legal department feared law suits should anything go wrong and ruined the feature!

What was also annoying is that there is no real hand brake anymore in many modern cars. Sucks when pulling off against a hill. Plus that at red traffic lights, I usually put the gear out (manual transmission) and pull the hand brake instead of keeping my foot on the clutch. That's not the same with this pseudo hand brake!

(In case you wonder why anyone would do that:
it's an anachronism that avoids lengthening the clutch wires, decades after cars switched to hydraulics.)

  • 3
    The touareg, the passat and the tiguan do the same. Its annoying as fuck. You’ll end up turning that shit off
  • 5
    Eurgh, I can't stand e-brakes. The pinnacle of "solving" a problem that doesn't exist.
  • 3
    Reasons why i have a 2001 vw
  • 4
    the worse part is having all that e-shit kinda takes your focus away from driving - eg you don't gaf about people crossing bcos the car brakes on its own, you don't stick to your lane anymore because the car does it and so on..but in reality that shit doesn't work 100% and 0.001% is enough to get you or someone else killed or even worse.
  • 2
    @AlmondSauce You mean the hand brake? It does solve a problem for the manufacturer. Since the regular brakes are controlled electronically anyway due to ABS, replacing the hand brake by a button that actuates the disc brakes cuts down on cost.

    @yellow-dog Modern cars are so ugly that their design alone is a reason for me not to own one. ^^

    @molaram It's definitely pushing drivers to drive on after they should have been taking a break. Also, I had optimum conditions today, dry and sunny. Who knows how reliable it would be in rainy nights.
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    @Fast-Nop i kinna like how the mk8 golf looks like, but for that price i can buy a blinged out 2014 scirocco or audi a6 lmao
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    @Fast-Nop I don't count cost-cutting as solving a problem :-)
  • 0
    Its only partially the lawyers fault. These technologies are so new they're still working out the best way to implement their ideas.

    Just wait til you see what chrysler has come up with in recent years. They've got what feels like a trani brake wired into the seatbelt sensor and if you take off without your belt on, it gives you a running start before locking up, immediately sending you into the steering wheel. What they should've done was to wire in the disk brakes and have them apply gradually first but the engineers haven't thought of that yet.

    Then they've got this auto stop/start thing that kills the motor any time you let off the gas putting a million times the wear on the starter. I'm praying I get out of this shit before the new models run out of warranty because these days most starters are a bitch to get to and I do work for two people that have vehicles with all this dumb shit on them.
  • 1
    @molaram I disagree, I drive tens of thousands of kms per year on a Q2 with all the e-shits and I’m as focused and ready to act as on a vehicle without them, I do agree with @Fast-Nop, I will drive longer stretches on it than I’ll be comfortable with on my A3 or R8, cars without said e-shits.

    If you’re a seasoned and skilled driver you won’t lay back - I understand that may be the case for people that start driving a car with assists from day 1.

    Lets make everyone drive a gasoline car pre-2000 with no ABS for a year or two after they get their license to get them skillz. Jokes aside, There should actually be laws against new drivers using assists - for instance, I did a small ~400km trip in a Volvo S90 and that shit drived almost by itself.
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    @whiteagle i think they're more going for removing the driver's responsibility entirely. Which will be awesome when it finally works well. A license to drive is already ridiculously easy to get, just no one cares because generally there aren't enough people involved in a traffic accident to put together a class action or a lobby. Worse case they sue each other which only puts more money in the pockets of the people responsible for drafting the law in the first place.
  • 1
    @M1sf3t I’m 100% for self driving, the issue is I believe we’re still a bit far from having road legal ones and some (not to say all) parts of the tech are already available today - my point was if someone starts driving a car full of assists and someday needs to drive a “real” “raw” car they won’t have their reflexes sharp enough and shit will happen.

    But ye, I’ve seen videos of the Tesla autopilot preventing accidents and it’s dope, humans would not be able to do some of the saves it does, so for sure the number of people saved by semi-self driving will always be much higher than deaths cause by drivers with inferior skills on “non-assisted” (?) cars due to being used to said technologies.
  • 1
    @whiteagle knowing how deep the government is into the pockets of the auto companies I doubt that will ever be a major issue. Between the safeties and the environmental stuff I look for them to ban vehicles of a certain age from all major roadways at some point.

    If they don't more and more people are going to wake up and realize that modern cars are not worth the price tag they come with. Companies with work trucks and diesel equipment are already realizing it because all that regen bullshit is killing them in maintenance cost and downtime right now plus the previous generation without it has significantly better performance numbers and fuel economy.
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    And If anyone ever successfully builds a maintenance saas like I was planning it'll become even more lucrative to buy older vehicles because maintenance cost for the more common systems will cost next to nothing.
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    @M1sf3t if a brand new electric self driving tesla whatever will cost me 0 dollars, catch me in my 1987 bmw e30 m3.
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    @M1sf3t they've started already in Europe like Germany, I hope I can drive my 2011 Citroën as long as possible because it doesn't have any of that fancy stuff and that's the way I like it. Cruise control, abs, ac, sound system(Inc radio) is pretty much all the fancy stuff you'd want
  • 0
    @yellow-dog true, tesla has thrown a wrench in things but that will only remain if they can manage to fix their assembly line and produce an economy line before the buzz wears off. They had to cut so many corners to compete that the only thing saving them is the vehicles were initially priced so high that the only ppl that could afford them were those that could afford for it to be down 2 weeks waiting on a warranty claim.

    Don't get me wrong, I am rooting for them and as zaney as he is, I've got a lot of respect for elon even having the balls to try, but if he pulls it off he'll be the first in decades. If not, the minute he folds big auto goes back to making their electric lines look like that godawful prius no one wanted just so they can continue to milk their petrol lines that peaked 10 years ago and now require very little r&d. And they'll succeed b/c all this electronic bullshit they're pushing has another 5 years of development before its any more than a gimmick.
  • 0
    The paper reigns
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    @M1sf3t The technology isn't new. The lane assist complaints with VW have been exactly the same 5 years ago, and nothing has changed.
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    @Fast-Nop damn really? I figured they were slowly rolling out updates each year. Generally that's what they do, rush a half ass feature to production then 5 years later they finally get it working properly. I guess with the safety stuff they can't afford to gamble as much.
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    @M1sf3t That's when they WANT to improve shit. Here, their legal department has won, and they don't want.
  • 1
    i bought two VW Golf from 2012 and i love them, enough technology to feel comfortable, no technology that makes me turn it off
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