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How lawyers fuck up technology!

I rented a car today, given that I don't want to go by train currently. That was some VW Golf, and it had a lane assist which can't decide whether to be helpful or obnoxious:

Either I kept the steering wheel and still steered myself, in which case the lane assist's actions made the steering feel somewhat wobbly. Initially, I suspected a worn out control arm bearing, but that's a long term damage in aging cars, not in new ones.

Or I just rested my hands on my upper legs, as I usually do (palms facing upwards and holding the wheel lightly), then the lane assist worked by itself. It was even smart enough to deactivate itself upon blinking before changing lanes.

However, it complained after about 15 seconds that I didn't steer. I said, shut up and do your job. The warning intensified, and I said, fuck you. Then it initiated some stutter braking to wake me up. Annoying like a reincarnation of Clippy.

I ended up giving the steering wheel a slight tip to the right every 15, 20 seconds just to let the lane assist know I was still there, relying on the lane assist to correct it again. On a long trip, I would have had to deactivate that crap.

Obviously, the VW engineers did their job, but the legal department feared law suits should anything go wrong and ruined the feature!

What was also annoying is that there is no real hand brake anymore in many modern cars. Sucks when pulling off against a hill. Plus that at red traffic lights, I usually put the gear out (manual transmission) and pull the hand brake instead of keeping my foot on the clutch. That's not the same with this pseudo hand brake!

(In case you wonder why anyone would do that:
it's an anachronism that avoids lengthening the clutch wires, decades after cars switched to hydraulics.)

Comments
  • 2
    The touareg, the passat and the tiguan do the same. Its annoying as fuck. You’ll end up turning that shit off
  • 5
    Eurgh, I can't stand e-brakes. The pinnacle of "solving" a problem that doesn't exist.
  • 2
    Reasons why i have a 2001 vw
  • 4
    the worse part is having all that e-shit kinda takes your focus away from driving - eg you don't gaf about people crossing bcos the car brakes on its own, you don't stick to your lane anymore because the car does it and so on..but in reality that shit doesn't work 100% and 0.001% is enough to get you or someone else killed or even worse.
  • 1
    @AlmondSauce You mean the hand brake? It does solve a problem for the manufacturer. Since the regular brakes are controlled electronically anyway due to ABS, replacing the hand brake by a button that actuates the disc brakes cuts down on cost.

    @yellow-dog Modern cars are so ugly that their design alone is a reason for me not to own one. ^^

    @molaram It's definitely pushing drivers to drive on after they should have been taking a break. Also, I had optimum conditions today, dry and sunny. Who knows how reliable it would be in rainy nights.
  • 1
    @Fast-Nop i kinna like how the mk8 golf looks like, but for that price i can buy a blinged out 2014 scirocco or audi a6 lmao
  • 2
    @Fast-Nop I don't count cost-cutting as solving a problem :-)
  • 1
    @molaram I disagree, I drive tens of thousands of kms per year on a Q2 with all the e-shits and I’m as focused and ready to act as on a vehicle without them, I do agree with @Fast-Nop, I will drive longer stretches on it than I’ll be comfortable with on my A3 or R8, cars without said e-shits.

    If you’re a seasoned and skilled driver you won’t lay back - I understand that may be the case for people that start driving a car with assists from day 1.

    Lets make everyone drive a gasoline car pre-2000 with no ABS for a year or two after they get their license to get them skillz. Jokes aside, There should actually be laws against new drivers using assists - for instance, I did a small ~400km trip in a Volvo S90 and that shit drived almost by itself.
  • 1
    @M1sf3t I’m 100% for self driving, the issue is I believe we’re still a bit far from having road legal ones and some (not to say all) parts of the tech are already available today - my point was if someone starts driving a car full of assists and someday needs to drive a “real” “raw” car they won’t have their reflexes sharp enough and shit will happen.

    But ye, I’ve seen videos of the Tesla autopilot preventing accidents and it’s dope, humans would not be able to do some of the saves it does, so for sure the number of people saved by semi-self driving will always be much higher than deaths cause by drivers with inferior skills on “non-assisted” (?) cars due to being used to said technologies.
  • 1
    @M1sf3t if a brand new electric self driving tesla whatever will cost me 0 dollars, catch me in my 1987 bmw e30 m3.
  • 1
    @M1sf3t they've started already in Europe like Germany, I hope I can drive my 2011 Citroën as long as possible because it doesn't have any of that fancy stuff and that's the way I like it. Cruise control, abs, ac, sound system(Inc radio) is pretty much all the fancy stuff you'd want
  • 0
    "Bureaucracy"
    The paper reigns
  • 1
    @M1sf3t The technology isn't new. The lane assist complaints with VW have been exactly the same 5 years ago, and nothing has changed.
  • 1
    @M1sf3t That's when they WANT to improve shit. Here, their legal department has won, and they don't want.
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