2
donuts
32d

A colleague on my team just confronted because she felt offended a lot by things I've said...

I don't recall saying anything that could offend her though other than an email yesterday that sorta triggered the convo.

But I'm like wtf.... Maybe I'm just not good at talking to ppl.... Especially girls

Comments
  • 6
    Give us some examples 🍿
  • 0
    @SortOfTested I needed to run a report she usually runs but rest of the team was off.

    I found the instructions and well it felt unclear. I had issues getting the right data formatted correctly for an app to consume.

    So after spending an hour trying to generate this report for a user. I also reply to her basically saying why the fck isn't all this automated. This is a monthly report...

    And she's like well yes there's a learning curve and everyone else seems to get it and usually takes her a few minutes. If you really want maybe u can update this stuff urself...

    She didn't mention any others specifically. But after what she just said I just basically lost it. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

    Best solution I guess is to just avoid her... Save us both the headache... Mostly mines.
  • 2
    sounds like she's one of the growin number of people that mistakes feelings of being offended with feelings of being told they're wrong. Then again, just to give her the benefit of the doubt, it could've been the way you said it, perhaps you were too harsh and to the point, or maybe she's just the type of person that requires a disproportional amount of compliments to accompany any criticism they're required to ingest. It's really anyone's guess these days, so many offenses, so little time 🙄
  • 4
    It all depends on how you said it. "Could we automate this as it's a monthly report?" or "I think should..." would be the proper way. Expressing the idea in a way that shows your frustration is unprofessional. Saying that you are frustrated is of course ok.
  • 0
    Also I just remembered the list of "everyone else" just included the people that taught her how to do it...

    And then she's like "for example just like everyone else if the person who wrote the code was no longer on the team u'd need to figure it all out anyway" and well to me that's the exact reason why I want it automated....

    So it's so simple a computer can understand it...

    Yes there's readability/design too but at least all the info is there... And you don't have to guess.
  • 1
    @M1sf3t I was going to mention KISS but thought she might be offended .. for a few reasons
  • 3
    @billgates yea i cant imagine that going over too well. First impressions being what they are, I doubt avoiding her will help either. Eventually your going to have to communicate and it will most likely go just as badly. Better you let her see that it wasn't personal and that your just that blunt with everyone. Ideally she'll become conditioned to it an the situation will get better. Maybe even throw her an occasional compliment to help smooth it over better. Worse case, she just continues to think your an asshole 🤷🏻‍♂️
  • 0
    @M1sf3t thinking next time I have a lot of free time... I'll probably automate this.... but keep it from her and the team.

    I'm estimating this as a 1 day task...
  • 0
    Put a smiley face after each sentence. For example: F*ck you 😂
  • 0
    @WildOrangutan I would need too make an app for that... which now involved reverse engineering data sent over HTTPS.... Which isn't possible?
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