55
Wisecrack
30d

this is the state of hiring tests:

1. can you take an english sentence, and without a tutorial, write a for loop?

2. okay now write a full parser. but not in the language we want to hire you in.

also we can afford to pay you in bananas, experience, and exposure.

p.s. we also need you to do this backend test because this is a backend job even though the ad is for front end and you specified an hour ago when the interview started that you only trained for front.

on the positive side, we have a ping pong table and a bean bag chair. and a two hour commute. Think of the benefits!

Comments
  • 20
    It makes sense, really. There's always money in the banana stand.
  • 7
    ping pong table and a bean bag chair??
    that seems fun.
    my office has 19th century chairs from craigslist and a broken carrom board with missing coins that's donated by a meth dealer
  • 2
    And those bean bags are reason for back and neck aches due to extremely poor ergonomics.
  • 7
    @F1973 look at this man. *slandering* our bean bags.

    this is an outrage.

    I demand a trial by combat.
  • 5
    @linus-torvald "yo bro
    see I need an APP. like amazon. but for meth."

    ".....thats illegal sir."
  • 3
    @SortOfTested thats also where the south american guerillas hide their machine guns.

    as is there custom.

    you know what they say "a banana in hand is worth two miniguns in the bush."
  • 3
    @Wisecrack *whispurs silently* meet me behind the building at 6...
  • 2
    @linus-torvald is this about storming cuba again?

    it is isnt it?

    fine, i'll build the boat but you're paddling.
  • 1
    2 hour commute? Damn i’m hesitating about taking a job with up to 3 hours a day
  • 1
    @bad-practice We need some sort of rule of thumb or flow-chart for whether or not to take a job with long commutes.

    First crack at it:

    No job with more than 3.5 *total* hours of commute per day (discounting trucking/taxis/etc lol).

    For every 30 minutes after the first 30, yearly salary should be hourlyWage*hoursTravelledPerYear.

    This does not account for the high end of the curve (lots of travel), or a general "misery curve" from too much travel.
  • 1
    @Wisecrack also depends on the kind of traveling. Public transport should be rated lower then the car. Unless the car is paid for or you are able to travel first class. There was also a factor of the kind of projects i would be working on. The level of interest there wasn’t high enough. Rejected the job in the end!
  • 0
    @bad-practice public transport is entirely out of the question.
    cars only. why?

    maybe its just me but I not, one, not two, but three job interviews that way. one was a bus no show (I confirmed it). and twice the bus driver saw me and picked back up speed. no I'm not shitting you. maybe it was because im white (eh racism cuts both ways) or they were simply behind and said "fuck it not stoping for one guy".

    and besides thise times there were others.
    one time they drove right on oast. called and clarified. "not scheduled for that stop." (lady on the other end sounded like it was her first day and I had the bus schedule pulled up on my phone)

    another time, the bus drove by w/o stopping, I called it in and they insisted the driver claimed to have stopped. I videoes the stop starting a few minutes before the scheduled time just to prove it, and the bus arrived kn time and I got to video it driving right back. THAT phkne call ended in blanket denials by the and bus company. and more.
  • 2
    @Wisecrack yeah i prefer driving car but here in Holland in the center of Amsterdam there is just NO way. Unless you (or the company) wants to pay €10 an hour for parking + gas money.

    You also have the risk of cyclists, they are everywhere in Amsterdam as well.

    I had jobs were i had to walk 15m everyday to and from my car because the boss was too cheap ass to arrange a parking spot.

    But indeed, better then dealing with crazy folks and weirdos on a daily basis for sure.

    Question; you’re white, and your avatar is brown? That’s just a 404 from my side. Please send bugreport.
  • 0
    @bad-practice
    I read that initially as "I had to walk 15 meters to my car," and thought, "either that's the wrong metric or europe's tolerance to traveling any distance is truly getting out of hand." 🤣
  • 0
    @SortOfTested i meant minutes hehe. Having a skateboard in the back of your car helps!
  • 0
    @bad-practice amsterdam sounds lovely.

    im white with some puertoguese.

    I just make my avatar whatever to throw people off for fun.
  • 1
    @linus-torvald don't suppose y'all hiring?
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