Hey Root, remember that super high-priority ticket that we ignored for five months before demanding you rewrite it a specific way in one day?

Yeah, the new approach we made you use broke the expected usecases, and now the page is completely useless to the support team and they're freaking out. Drop everything you're doing and go fix it! Code-complete for this release is tonight! -- This right after "impacting our business flow" while being collapsed on the fucking floor.

Jesus FUCKING christ, what the fuck is wrong with these people?

If I dropped the ball on a high-priority ticket for two weeks, I'd get fired, let alone for five fucking months.

If I was a manager and demanded a one-day rewrite I can only imagine the amount of chewing out I'd receive, especially on something high-priority.

And let's not forget product ownership: imagine if I screwed up feature planning for someone so badly I made them break a support tool in production. I'd never hear the end of it.

Fucking double standards.

And while I'm at it. Some of the code I've seen in this codebase is awful. Uncommented spaghetti, or an unreadable mess with single-letter variables, super-tightly coupled modules so updates are nearly impossible, typos in freaking constants added across sixty+ files, obviously-incorrect comments, ... . I'll have to start posting snippets to show them off. But could I get away with any of it? ha. Hell no. My code must be absolutely perfect. I hear about any and every flaw, doesn't matter how minor, and nothing can go out until everything is just so.

Hell, I even hear about flaws in other peoples' code during my code reviews. Why? Because I should have fixed it, that's why. But if I do, I get yelled at for "muddying the waters."


It's like playing a shell game where no matter which shell I pick (or point to their goddamn sleeve where they're clearly hiding it), I get insulted for being so consistently useless, and god damn, how can I never find the fucking pea or follow the damned rules? I'm so terrible and this is why "nobody trusts me." Fuck you.

I'll tell you why I can't find your damned pea: IT'S RATTLING INSIDE YOUR FUCKING HEADS, you ASSHOLE FUCKING IMBECILES.

That's right: one pea among the lot of them.

goddamn I am fucking pissed off.

  • 8
    I'm convinced that being fired at this point would be a service to you.

    You really need to put up boundaries.
  • 5
    @iSwimInTheC They don’t listen. They just get angry, or ignore it and continue anyway.

    The only reason I’m still here is because I haven’t found something else yet.
  • 3
    @Root I hope you find something eventually.
  • 6
    @Root please start taking care of yourself. You can go and see a doc, tell him that you collapsed. Get a doctors note for a paid sick leave. For one week or even two weeks. Dont even monitor company emails or slack. Fuck it. There are some things that are in your control which you can do if only you would stop being a perfectionist and would accept that you are a human being. Stop working yourself to grave. I worked in 6 jobs in Europe and have never witnessed such toxicity that you mentioned here. Fuck it even if I would notice such bullshit I would probably put in my 2 weeks and would land some chill remote junior position just to feed myself until I find something better. Please do something.

    What they will do to you? Fire you? I assume you will still get paid for sick days and still get paid severance if they fire you, no? Try to relax and start applying to more places, do some interviews if you have the energy/strength.
  • 3
    You rant a lot. I'd say it's time for a new job.
  • 4
    Everyone here is right, of course.

    This place is … full of duck droppings, vomit, poorly executed bad virtue signaling, strutting, and circle jerking. It’s like diving into a sea of diarrhea for a living, and having management both accuse you of causing the smell and demand to know why you complain. To call it toxic is a serious compliment.

    The collapses I mentioned aren’t strictly related; they’re from a health issue, amusingly that I caught directly because of working in this sewer of a company. But the stress certainly isn’t helping with them, nor is their casual disregard for my well-being.

    I’m looking for work, and might just quit outright, but I’ll talk to HR beforehand if I decide to do that. Lots of juicy accusations to share that will do absolutely nothing.

    For now, though, I’m still here simply because I haven’t found anything else, and they pay well enough I can invest the rest and get passive income off it. The goal is for me to never have to work again. :) Not quite there yet, though.

    But yes. The company is toxic as hell and I really need to leave.

    If any of you ever find yourself interviewing for a Cali fintech company, ask if their mascot is a duck. (They won’t offer that bit of sacred company knowledge until you’ve been hired, but might if asked.) And if it is, run away! It’s so not worth the steep cost to your mental and physical health.
  • 1
    @Root Golden handucuffs. You sold your soul mate
  • 1
    You need to find another job. That place is the pits
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