!dev

Before I bought a couch, I thought I had to get a couch because when I have a girl at my place, she will definitely think I'm a serial killer who's going to murder her.

Now that I have my couch, yeah I still don't have any girls over.

Thank you for coming to my Ted talk.

probably bought the wrong couch then

I thought couches are meant to nail women from the behind

So now instead of just one empty room it's an empty room with a big couch in the middle...

and you thought this is less creepy? Why don't you also add a sink and few bloody bone saws will you?

You should get a barstool and keep a small collection of space jam DVDs (maybe 5 or 10) on it and never let anyone sit on the barstool. Serial killer type stuff

Never mind girls, I bought my couch so I would listen to new music with my main speakers. I have yet to listen to one new album. The couch is the best place to be in though.

You know what girls really can't get enough of?

Guys who have the confidence to do what they want because they want to and not because they want to impress a girl.

Don't be a limp penis and attract girls that want to be impressed. Much like your perceived motives, their vanity is a candy coating on a shit nugget.

Thanks for listening to my Ted talk

@sariel Well said. Thank you!

@electrineer I never knew that, but couches are awesome. A huge change from working and eating at the desk for years.

Brah, logically when one considers what fresh fuckery relationships almost always sneak upon us with, you're actually ahead by a few light years. Look around you, the tragic, the lost... and count your blessings things...