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First week at job as newly graduated from CompSci. And I feel like a fucking monkey trying to figure out how everything works, I have help from the main developer but it feels like I have to ask questions all the time and I can feel the judgement in his voice. Today I committed my first lines of code (phoneformatting) and he basically had to hold my hand the whole way through. I feel like shit atm, I really want to be good at this, I watch tutorials but when it comes down to it my mind just blanks out and I can't figure out how to even write a simple fucking method in php (which he did and my brain just shut down ). Please help me, how do I improve at remembering all these terminologies, I feel like if I keep it up like this they won't have me around for long.

Comments
  • 5
    stop pressuring yourself, everybody is nervous in the first week. Give yourself at least 3 months to blend in.
  • 5
    Yeah, we all go through this at some point. Give yourself some time to get used to all the new things, try not to blame yourself for not knowing stuff.

    As for all the terminology, read some stuff, do some stuff, and it will stick.

    Remember, this is normal, and it will pass :)
  • 6
    The absolute key words in there are the very first 2: "First week". Dude... calm down.

    You will not be expected to produce flawless work without any assistance *ever*, let alone in your first week. One task at a time. Do what you need to do and ask for whatever help you need. After a while, it'll all sink in.
  • 12
    In 20 years you'll be like "It's been 20 years since I graduated from CompSci, and I still feel like a fucking monkey trying to figure out how everything works..."

    Always be a monkey trying to figure out how everything works.

    Stay hungry, learn, and help a few folks along the way. That will make you a happy and successful monkey.
  • 5
    This is the "having-to-master-whatever-I-touch" syndrome
  • 2
    At least you're not a know-it-all graduate who has an answer for everything... even when it's the wrong answer!

    You're there and you're doing what you can and, most importantly, you're learning! You are like the new doctor starting his residency, you know where the appendix is, but they'll just let you hold the clamp... and there's nothing wrong with that!

    And as for your mentor - he needs to take the the bass and judgement out of his fucking voice! He was also once where you find yourself now. I have a junior under my wing and I wish I had that kind of mentorship when I was his age.

    Keep at it! Continue learning! Carry on doing! Stay curious! 😎
  • 2
    @asgs yes sometimes you gotta be like shit I don't know how to do that.
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