HP printer: *starts acting on its own*
*pulls plug*

NOW WHO FUCKING OWNS YOU, FUCKING PIECE OF SHIT?!! WHO PAID COLD HARD FUCKING MONEY FOR YOU HUH, FUCKING PIECE OF SHIT?!!!!

Don't you ever dare to do anything again, unless I fucking tell you to, fucking worthless piece of shit, that can't even do its printer jobs properly!!! WORTHLESS FUCKING PIECE OF JUNK!!!

Guess I'll leave it unplugged until I have a new print job for it at this point. Geez, can't even trust my fucking printer to do what it's supposed to anymore!!! Long live the world in Big Brother. Lest we forget that there exists such a thing as fucking ownership!!!

@davenall It already can't use its half-full cartridges anymore for whatever reason, so I doubt that cleaning them out at this point will be in any way useful. If that was the case, it should've done this several months ago. Yet it didn't, because they get you not on the razor, but on the blades.

Speaking of cartridges, did you know that they're only worth about 50 cents a pop? Yet somehow they cost €10-50 a pop, again.. for whatever reason I really can't comprehend.

@Condor thats why I buy a new printer instead of cartridges, thats cheaper.

@Condor a tiny elf stuck in your printer was shouting for help. He was trying to draw your attention by using your printer. Now the little lad is left to die in there. All alone. In the dark and alien place.

Save the elf, Condor! Save him!

As for the price -- printer manufacturers started this like 10 years ago. Or even before then :) they lower their printer prices below what they are worth and catch up on cartriges' price, which is oh so high. It's like Apple nowdays :)
people are forced to buy new cartriges from the manufacturer, bcz they are cheaper than a new printer and another vebdor's cartrige won't fit in your printer. And quite often the rule 'the cheaper the printer, the more expensive the cartrige' holds true.

Now it's quite okay while you're a business or an avg Joe, bcz you can spend a better dime for the device itself to save on its components later. But if you're a government institurion you MUST buy whatever matches your requirements AND is the cheapest offer. Which automatically ties you for high maintenance costs for upcoming like 4 years. Gov institutions have no other choice here. Boy does that make printer vendors happy :)

I think Apple is doing the same thing with their devices and addons. Except Apple does not lower the devices' price - they make everything expensive 😁

@netikras nee printers can be had from 25 euros, 4 cartridges are 32 euro (when getting offbrand)

@Condor They might cost 50 cents to make, but they are worth $10-15. There is pretty big difference in meaning for those two, since the second one indicates how much people are willing to pay for them. No reason to sell them cheaper if you won't make more profit.

@arraysstartat1 keeping the prizes artifically high is illegal

@davenall they can be refilled though and even the shop owned by a turkish man (turkish shops are really cheap in the netherlands) the ink is expensive as hell

That's why I have a Brother printer that was expensive enough so that Brother earns the money with the printer. The toner cartridge is third party, no problems.

Oh, and just because I'm paranoid, I have blacklisted the printer for internet access in my router.

.

@netikras however to be fair to Apple, every apple device I've had I've gotten minimum 5 years use out of and it usually failed due to outside circumstances.

I've rarely had a printer not shit the bed within 18 months. Usually right after getting new cartridges...

I decided it's cheaper and more convenient to ditch my inket printer and take a walk to the copyshop. How much do you print stuff these days anyway? Twice a year? Tax-declaration and other goverment stuff?

@heyheni Maybe not a bad idea for me to consider that as well, if there's any nearby. Printed out an entire book in a copycenter near my former school for about €10, bonded and everything. Just imagine how many cartridges that'd take on an inkjet.. the bloody book is over 200 pages. And then they can deal with the printer issues too.. win-win! Perhaps I'll just keep my printer for scanning, but it's not really useful for much else anyway.

Or buy a shitton of printers - new one after the initial cartridge dies, just for the components because they're loss leaders anyway.. let's see how long printer companies can hold up at that rate :v

This is along the same line as printing something and getting random ASCII out.

@Parzi well at this point it's not printing out anything anymore 🙃 I took a peek inside it a while ago, but apparently the paper dispenser thingy now got in an erroneous state (a paper jam without paper apparently). It was a chintzy plastic thing with springs and shit on it that was assembled in such a weird way, I've probably reassembled it wrong. Not that I'm still worried about it though, that printer is awaiting destructive disassembly and salvaging of the components.. I want to see just how shitty it really is :3