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Epic code fight broke out today when one developer fronted himself for leader due to having beat all the metrics by a factor of ten. Claimed he could replace the entire department based on LOC alone.

Another developer told him to fucking zip it.

After almost coming to blows someone managed to explain to him that he had to put his code into a compressed archive.

As it compressed to ten times smaller than the next smallest contribution he declared victory because his compressed better. Another developer joked better call bomb squad.

Comments
  • 4
    and where does your ego fit in this shit show? 😄
  • 5
    A penis / genital comparison and competition based on LOC..

    May I ask... What is NOT going wrong in your company / work environment?
  • 5
    The dark side of brocoding.
  • 3
    Wow. Very important. Much meaningful. Attaboi.

    Guys just whip 'em out and do the measuring right there. And get over it. And get back to work already
  • 2
    @IntrusionCM the muscle man can be found in most companies.

    While to the untrained eye they might appear impressive on the surface when the synthol and padding is removed you're left with skin and bone.

    It is more serious than penis envy. The muscle man truly believes he's pulling the most weight, often all the weight. He may perceive others as pulling against him when their commits wipe out half his code and half his perceived productivity.

    He will often truly believe that he is the real producer and that everyone else inhibits his productivity.

    As he believes he's the top producer then he'll also expect the greatest recompense, respect, privilege and rank. He may believe himself to be a prodigy and next in line for CTO.

    He may behave as a hotshot surrounded by envious rivals. He will likely believe he has imposter syndrome. He may be an imposter. Fake it until you make it.
  • 0
    I thought HR hired mentally stable people overall. Hm, unsafe call to HiredNewguy.
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