Alright guys, I need some advice now from you..

My employer is super impressed with my worked and they are willing to relocate me to the US (Seattle).

As you all are aware that I am actively trying to move out of my country but lately have realised that no matter what, it's home.

Also, I am way to close to my mother and don't want to leave her alone for an extended period of time as both my parents are ageing and I cannot be a selfish fuck to ignore them during their last phase of life.

I want to make the most to spend time with them.

Some key points that I need help with
- I am more inclined towards the UK/EU than US
- Need to spend time with parents/family
- Need to secure some cash for some key life moments

Some challenges:
- Cannot take parents along because they'd not be able to settle for more than 1.5 month outside for various reasons
- If I am moving out, why shouldn't I go to a place I love than a place I don't?

Some plans:
Plan A: Move to Seattle (6 months) > FAANG > Get a high paying high in India (all this in 2 year duration) > Settle down > Periodically travel Europe and explore hobbies

Plan B: Move to Seattle (6 months) > FAANG (optional) > Find a job in the UK/EU (4.5 year duration) > Fullfill EU dreams > Get a high paying job in India > Settle > Continue exploring hobbies

Plan C: Stay in India with current company (6 months) > IJP or EJP to the UK/EU (5 year duration) > Fullfill EU dreams > Get a high paying job in India > Settle > Continue exploring hobbies

I need to pick one while keeping in my that I can spend more time with parents and fullfill my dreams as well. I am confident that money will follow and I'll save enough for my retirement. Willing to trade off some extremely high paying jobs for a happier lifestyle.

@UnicornPoo good point.

I can be in India twice for atleast a month each (employer is flexible - 2 weeks WFH and 2 weeks leave).

And they can visit for 1.5 month twice a year before they get bored out their skulls.

With that we arrive at 20 weeks of times together in a year of 52 weeks which is ~38.5% of the yearly time together.

Which doesn't seem that bad either actually.

@UnicornPoo flight time is 24 hours with additional wait time of 5 hours in case I rush for any emergencies and no flight is available at that point in time.

Have you ever been to Seattle? I mean, do you already know you won’t like it?

@atrabilious no, I have not been to Seattle. I did put forth a request to allow me to make a few trips so that I can get a sense of air.

With respect to liking it or not, I don't generally follow well with US (and it's a very personal thing) and I have been more inclined towards UK/EU because that place interests me more for countless reasons.

Well for one, is Indian salary going to be enough for taxes and life expenses in USA? Considering this, and the fact that you want to be closer to your parents, plan C sounds relatively better (in my opinion). Another thing you should consider is what's your parent's age and health? If they're good now, it might be a better idea to actually prioritize success for now and see them less, so when they become older/less healthy, you will have more money/time and ability to support them. While if they're not so good now, you might want to prioritize taking care of them now while they're still with you.

@SoldierOfCode they'd pay me US wages, which would be a fuck ton of money in Indian currency.

They are in good shape with god's grace.

You should invest in the stock market with high paying dividends and become an income investor. Don't rely on active income alone. Have multiple sources of income.

@Devnergy ofc. That's a current side project being worked on while I make this another decision.

Answering is hard ... Especially as the sum of factors involved is extremely high.

I'm unfamiliar with both countries.

I've looked at national jobs before and what has helped me form a decision was to write down random thoughts for a week in a notebook...

Most of it made me realize a few things:

I'll need to have a look at the relative cost of living (food, shelter, electricity, travel costs, local transport costs, moving costs, ....) and at the cost of public services.

-- public services e.g. for health issues, visa, passport services, legal consultation (reminder: different country, legal advice highly recommended), ....
-- local costs should be clear
-- costs for moving and travel on seperate pages as they quickly add up
-- example: extra fees for luggage, customs, legal documents, ...

When I've crunched the numbers down, the question is: Will the salary be enough? I realized for quite a lot high paying jobs that the salary would be totally eaten away. Either by living costs, e.g. flat… or transport costs... Or insurance costs (I'm a living train wreck, US insurances won't cover me without selling my organs on a regular basis).

My personal goal was to reduce stress and find a job where I could work based on my own rules (despite my rants, I've succeeded. no more 60 - 70 hours / week, I'm down to 40 and less).

I highly recommend making a list for these aspects too - working in FAANG is pretty useless when you're unhappy with your daily life.

Traveling back is stress. I gave up my national search as soon as I thought about it... Traveling for > 1h to have a weekend or few days with family is a burden, especially when you have to plan in a day or two for recovery from traveling and additionally a day or two for desasters (flight delayed, sitting somewhere in the nowhere cause train stopped...).

A lot of additional random thoughts: Culture, Gastronomy, Making friends, Education, Safety net (How can I get away if it all fails), Work Law (Can I quit?)....

@IntrusionCM all the relocation cost you mentioned would be covered by my employer so no worries on that.

I am with you on less stress and willing to trade of crazy high salary for that.

Cost of living is something I need to figure yet but based on Glassdoor my company pays ~150K for my designation in Seattle.

I am not entirely familiar with taxes in the US and other costs but I assume post taxation I'll have at least ~100K USD and CoL expenses could be ~50K a year.

So some additional arithmetic needs to be done but seems achievable.

In the long run, less stress and me being able to pursue my hobbies is what I am looking at.

@Floydimus Yeah, my message was less of an precise answer and more of an stimuli.

I would double and triple check what the employer understands under "relocation costs".

Best is having a law safe definition....

Sitting in an empty flat was by the way one of my worst nightmares xD

Regarding taxes etc: You find lots of information on government sides...

In germany, 40 % for taxes is common by the way. :)

@IntrusionCM I understood your point and just replied to few specific (thinking out loud).

I did read some relocation policies and it's sorted. It's a big firm so they got their shit.

I agree on living in an empty apartment. Setting up everything could be a task.

40% in Germany would be absolutely worth it man.

US I saw that the slab I could be in is 24% but all that could be figured out.

@Floydimus All in all.

*Slips in the Roxette drag*

listen to your heart *sings*

@IntrusionCM haha I'll be in EU soon and we'll then hangout lot more often.

Tbh get US permanent residency then take remote jobs. The time difference will be a bitch but if you are selective you can find ones that won’t have many meetings. Or once you’ve got a bit of FAANG under your belt no one will doubt you as a free lancer.

Also if there’s a similar option just across the border in Vancouver, your parents could be able to eventually get Canadian Super Visas which are 10 year visas

@jeeper

1. Getting a PR of the US will need me to stay there for quite a long time which I don't intend to.

2. Even if I get a PR, the job market and how companies operate would change by then.

3. Even if they don't change, the time zone gap would be a nightmare for both, company and me to work which will be stressful that I no longer want.

4. Same as US, not a big fan of Canada and another reason is climate. I have lived in a humid region for all my life. Anything below 27°C makes me shiver. Canada is super cold and parents won't move because of many reasons and language barrier is one of them alongside cultural differences.

”Save enough for retirement” - sorry mate I was with you and going to try and help you out until that line. That just got me. Dumbfounded it’s a reality. 🤯

Also, just Europe.

@100110111 what was shocking?

Not sure whether sarcasm or something else.

@Floydimus shocking that having to save for retirement is a thing

@100110111 Europeans don't save?

@Floydimus one doesn’t have to. Many do, though, since more money to spend when you’re retired is more money to spend. But it’s not a neccessity.

@100110111 I think this statement isn't true...

Many states warn that one should have a private retirement plan as many systems have an uncertain future.

Looking at the news the last 2 years I wouldn't recommend relying on the government :) ;)

@IntrusionCM well I don’t think people my age will ever see retirement age anyways, so hardly matters, eh?

@100110111 I doubt that model of relying on government would work even in Europe.

@100110111 I don't know what your age is... But retirement savings are in general a good idea.... And the plans of some government's to increase the working age to e.g. up to 70 only work because people don't have an retirement plan.

@Floydimus I think points 2 and 3 can be overcome. They aren’t strong enough to outweigh the potential monetary upside.

1 and 4 vary by value system. I’m looking at it as a constraint satisfaction problem against the constraint of maximizing earning. You’re looking at it as a constraint satisfaction problem of maximizing comfort and family time.

@jeeper either way, not keen on US for longer term.

Hello how're you doing today