Got the job. Not sure I want the job. Or any job in my field. A quarter century feels like too long for any profession. But I don’t have any other marketable skills. Maybe I’ll be a truck driver. Or wash peoples’ car windows when they’re stopped at traffic signals.

I’m surprised your wrists still work

My fingers are fucked up after years of dev

@molaram problem with trucks is you get fat and fuck up your kidneys and you’re not really traveling you’re driving places and sleeping at night

@molaram semis bounce around a lot in their shocks which a good can can and shocks can offset but not eliminate which puts strain on the kidneys by constantly impacting them according to my dad who used to manage truckers

@molaram yeah maybe you can help me teach him how to die horribly

@molaram yeah except mine were such that the reality was I was all alone in the world and they cut out anytime I truly truly needed them and even given their fucked up nature quietly helped destroy their adult children and sure as fuck helped destroy them when they were still young children.

@AvatarOfKaine My wrists still work but it’s my brain I miss the most. An older mind really does have difficulty with all the new things the kids are into. They need to get off my lawn.

@stackodev what I envy you for is that I had people willfully trying to destroy mine and what I got is a pain filled strong willfullness and understanding of one horrific subsection of human kind.

but I keep having my continuing logical bend to my mind interrupted by sheer survival needs.

its infuriating.

for the last x number of years I've hardly slept or been at peace like I was in normal life, but you know even in normal life I didn't have the feeling of security I needed to be happy either heh

and my brain is getting older as well, i'm past my middle age.

@stackodev though only a few years ago I didn't look that bad and if i got back in shape i wouldn't look bad at all.